The Returned Saintess’s Exorcism Broadcast – Episode 8: Chaos at the Hospital
Cheatu, the nation’s premier broadcasting streaming platform, got its name from the phrase “I’ll give you a cheat key for your broadcast.” It sounded like it promised to give your livestream a pair of wings, yet it was pure Korean wordplay that had somehow become the official name.
“This is a total mess, isn’t it?”
The demons had broken through, but the company sat far enough from the front lines that the building itself was still standing. Every single employee had shown up for work and the streaming service was still live. So the real threat was no longer the distant monsters; it was the endless flood of new broadcasts happening right in front of our eyes.
“Want to shake hands with a demon? Is it even right to gamble your life on this?”
People were lining up to film close-ups of demons, to fight them, to interview them—anything to boost the viewership numbers and subscriber count. No matter who was watching or how many there were, the situation had become a perfect storm for streaming fame.
“This broadcast is going to be shut down.”
A monitoring staff member stepped straight up to a woman with a skin condition that looked like it had been bitten raw and forced the stream to end. She was live, screaming, and the entire office had to watch the uncut footage.
“What the hell happened to everyone? Are we all crazy? Is the world actually ending?”
The team leader let out a dry chuckle. The employees wanted to say, We’re the only ones who haven’t lost their minds in this madness. Instead they held it in and asked for an explanation.
“It’s probably because of this broadcast.”
“What? The Inquisitor Hanai stream where she catches demons? What is this garbage?”
“From the logs, it used to be a prayer broadcast for the Inquisitor.”
“What? Is it even a fake religion stream? Are you worshipping demons now?”
The team leader tossed out the joke, but when he saw the week’s hottest clip the smile vanished from his face.
“This is the clip that’s blowing up right now.”
“What? Real? Is it edited?”
“Yes. It’s real-time.”
A beautiful woman in a nun’s habit cosplay was fighting a vintage pistol and a thrusting sword, winning every time. She looked more trustworthy than the detective standing right beside her.
“Hey, this violates broadcasting rules. It’s too violent.”
“I already tried to cut it in the middle…”
“Tried? Why didn’t you?”
The team leader was about to start grilling her when the employee simply started clicking the mouse and keyboard. Mouse clicks and keystrokes were faster than words.
“Look at this.”
“What? Blocked? When the hell did you even make this?”
“I don’t know. Every other stream got forcibly terminated, but this one won’t.”
“Then block the account entirely.”
“That doesn’t work either.”
“What the— Why can’t you block the account? Is there anyone here who actually knows what’s going on?”
The team leader scanned the room, but everyone dropped their eyes. No one knew. He muttered, These useless freeloaders, yet even he had no answer. The new hire lifted her hand timidly.
“Can I… say something?”
“Sure. Go ahead, newcomer. Show us how clever and sharp you are.”
“If there really is a god who can’t be stopped from broadcasting…”
The team leader slammed his desk with a stack of papers. “Yah! Who the hell recruited you? The moment the monsters appeared we couldn’t even block a massive hack and now you’re trying to give us all high blood pressure? Just find out who’s helping this fake nun and get her on the spot!”
While the team leader stormed off to smoke, the employees grumbled.
“How are we supposed to know the god we don’t believe in?”
“Yeah. Don’t let it get to you, Jiyeon. The team leader just needed a punching bag.”
The older colleagues patted the deflated newcomer’s back.
“Sorry for saying useless things.”
“Jiyeon, stop that.”
“I really feel like quitting this place.”
“Maybe staying here is better than going home?”
“Better? Think about it. If this company really has a god’s protection, walking out would be the dumbest thing ever.”
The others laughed it off as a joke.
“That was hilarious just now.”
“Yeah. Does a god actually exist?”
“If a god exists, it must be some kind of monster that can’t even stop this woman from streaming while she’s supposed to be saving the world?”
The employee who had been cursing the very idea of gods grabbed the can of soda she had left on her desk.
CHEEIJK!
“Aaaah!”
“Oh my! Are you okay?”
Soda sprayed straight into her face the moment the tab was pulled.
“I must have been cursed for mocking the gods.”
“Shut up and grab a towel or something!”
While the others laughed and played, Jiyeon kept her head down so she wouldn’t trigger another disaster. She reopened the browser tab she had hidden earlier.
The stream she had been secretly watching showed the woman in the nun habit talking with a doctor in the emergency room.
***
“How did the accident happen but you’re perfectly fine?”
“Because the god protected me.”
She had insisted on going home, yet they had forced her into an ambulance. Even in the ER they checked her over and found her unharmed. A saintess who could use holy magic would never stay in a hospital this long.
“Everyone, I’m fine.”
-After the car accident but still alive? That’s gotta be god’s protection.
-Mercy, the goddess, protected you.
Once the viewers realized she was truly unharmed, the chat flooded with relief messages.
-Detective Minjae, are you okay?
“Detective Minjae? I’ll be fine.”
“Fine? I’m going to die from post-accident pain.”
In contrast, Detective Minjae was barely holding back a sob. Even though he had been the one who fought to protect her during the crash, the pain he had been ignoring was now crashing down on him. It was only natural.
“I told you I’d treat you.”
“I don’t need it! I don’t believe in any of that holy stuff.”
She could heal with a simple magic spell, but the detective refused every offer. If he said hospital treatment was better, then she would stop helping.
“Doctor, can I be discharged?”
“Discharged? Are you sure? Post-accident pain can hit you much later.”
“I’m sure. I’ve seen more injured people than me.”
Even at the biggest hospital in Seoul, the ER was packed. Patients were being turned away to other facilities because the waiting room was full. In this situation, a perfectly healthy saintess taking up a bed was an absolute nuisance.
Plus, they rejected my offer to help heal the injured.
When she tried to use healing magic, the hospital staff had flatly refused. To them it looked like a nun in a habit spouting magical nonsense; of course they wouldn’t trust her. Yet she understood their reasoning perfectly.
They said that anyone infected with the plague is hopeless, so they should burn them or prepare for zombies. I’m sure they’ll handle it on their own.
The hospital was full of patients and people. If a plague carrier walked through these doors, infection would spread uncontrollably. Hospitals were ground zero in every zombie movie for a reason.
“Then, Detective, I’ll be going. Call me if you need anything later.”
“Sure. If you’re okay, I could have driven you home.”
“I’m fine. But please watch my broadcast later.”
“I might not have time.”
With that she stepped out of the main building and froze. A patient in a hospital bed was being pushed toward the elevator. Normally she would have passed by, but the patient’s belly was swollen to the point of bursting, veins and arteries clearly visible.
A plague carrier.
She had specifically told them not to let any in.
“Stop!”
She summoned the pistol just as the doors began to close.
“Wait—!”
“Is that a prop gun? Or a real one?”
The hospital security guard slowly approached her, a mock musket in hand.
“Stop that elevator right now!”
“I understand it’s urgent, but please wait for the next one.”
“No! I need you to stop the elevator!”
At that moment a deafening explosion thundered from above. The ceiling lights flickered on and off.
“What? Is this a terror attack?”
“Terror attack?! That was it?!”
Chaos erupted the instant the sound hit. Only she knew exactly what had happened.
“That elevator stopped at floor three. What’s on the third floor?”
“Excuse me?”
“What’s on it?! Pay attention!”
She grabbed the security guard by the collar and shook him hard. He answered in panic.
“Surgery room and ICU.”
“Then stop the elevator and immediately isolate the third floor. No one in or out.”
“Ma’am, what kind of—”
As an Inquisitor she issued the order, but it carried no weight here. She needed someone with actual authority over the building.
“Detective Minjae!”
She knew he would listen.
“Ma’am! What was that explosion?”
“You heard it. We need to seize control of this hospital right now!”
“Excuse me?”
“Not ‘excuse me’! We have to stop this hospital from becoming the plague’s first foothold!”
“First foothold?”
“If you don’t want to see more people die, I need your help, Detective!”
The detective didn’t understand the situation, but the mention of human lives made him straighten up. He slammed his hand on the desk.
“Everyone, stay calm!”
People rushing to leave and the crowd still talking made it impossible to control. In the end the detective had no choice but to fire his pistol into the ceiling.
-[loud echo] REVERBERATION
The gunshot was shockingly effective. It silenced the entire room instantly.
“For the investigation of that explosion, the police will take control of this situation from now on! Everyone stay still and hospital staff please cooperate. This is an emergency!”
The detective’s title was truly convenient. The security guard who had ignored her orders immediately turned off the elevator power.
Detective Minjae, you’re going to be a huge help from now on.
With control in his hands, there was only one thing left to do.
I have to purify this hospital.
She raised her rapier and pistol once more.