Our Cafe is Open for Business
6. Our Cafe is Open for Business
The Dark Magician Girl YouTuber stared at me with a pouty expression after failing to spot any trick no matter how hard she looked. “Could you maybe pick it up again and set it down somewhere else?”
“Of course. As many times as you like.”
She must have decided there was some kind of magnetic device hidden in the table, so she asked me to move it. I lifted the statue exactly as she requested and placed it on the floor. Still nothing.
Other streamers gradually approached, touching the statue or trying to lift it themselves.
“Wow, this is actually insane.”
“How on earth did you do that?”
No one here had come believing the “only good people can lift it” claim. They had all shown up hoping to create some decent content, but when the statue truly refused to budge, they grew genuinely fascinated and focused on their broadcasts.
Since things had already reached this point, I decided to put on a little more of a magic show. I turned to the Dark Magician Girl, who was still circling the statue with a puzzled look, and said, “Would you mind standing on top of the statue?”
“On the statue? Like this?”
As a well-known magician herself, she followed my instructions without complaint, almost like she had become a magician’s assistant. She climbed onto the Cerer Goddess Statue, wrapping her arms and legs around it. Her eyes sparkled with anticipation for whatever trick I was about to perform. The other streamers and customers were all watching intently.
“Perfect. Just stay still and don’t move.”
I grabbed the neck of the statue she was perched on and, with one hand, lifted it effortlessly.
“Huh? Wh-whoa?!”
Highly trained muscles were indistinguishable from magic. I activated my Sex Power and poured strength into my arm. The result was superhuman strength that should have been impossible for an ordinary human body. Enough to casually lift a statue with a roughly 50 kg woman sitting on it using only one hand.
“Whoa!”
“Is this real life?!”
“He lifted that with one hand?”
The onlookers expressed their disbelief. Of course, no one was more shocked than the woman actually sitting on the statue. As a magic expert, she knew there had been no trick at all. If this had been pure muscle power, it would have been physically impossible. If I had been some hulking brute, people might have suspected something, but my appearance was completely ordinary. She was clearly convinced there must be some hidden magic trick she simply couldn’t see.
I slowly lowered the statue back down. She climbed off and began waving her hands around the statue as if searching for invisible wires. When she found nothing, she looked straight into her camera and spoke.
“Listen, most tricks like this are done with the person on top in on it, but I only met this guy today. I didn’t help with any part of the trick. Plus, I can’t find any wires or hidden devices no matter how hard I look. I came here to expose the trick, but I seriously have no idea. Is it actually true that only good people can lift it?”
The famous magic YouTuber had declared GG. She might not have been the greatest magician alive, but she was well-known enough that among everyone present and watching the stream, no one understood magic better than she did. The voices crying “fake” gradually lost their power. Other YouTubers joined in, confirming there were no devices anywhere.
Han Gaeul’s core fanbase was still small since she had only recently become famous, but these other streamers already had large, dedicated audiences. Once they vouched that the footage wasn’t manipulated, their fans would defend it on their own.
“Seriously, how did you do that?”
“Hey now, isn’t it rude to ask a magician to reveal their trick?”
Someone had even brought an electromagnetic detector, but it picked up nothing. They kept insisting there had to be a trick, but after failing to prove it, they quietly backed off.
‘Does this mean it’s resolved?’
Park Nayoung looked over at me and smiled as if to say “good job.” I smiled back. The manipulation controversy wouldn’t vanish completely, but at least a good portion of the malicious comments would disappear. On top of that, a bunch of YouTubers had shown up uninvited. Combined, their subscribers easily exceeded a million. If they uploaded today’s footage, plenty of new customers would come flooding in.
Just as I was about to let out a sigh of relief, someone suddenly stepped forward. It was the man who had bought cake earlier. He glared at us and shouted, “You’re all in on this together, aren’t you?!”
* * *
YouTuber Jinsoo Woo. He used to work as an informant for the cyber wrecker channel IssueWrecker before quitting to start his own YouTube channel.
‘Even those IssueWrecker bastards have hundreds of thousands of subscribers. Someone like me should hit a million easily.’
Reality, however, showed only a hundred subscribers, making him sigh. When he first crossed a hundred, he thought growth would come quickly, but no matter how many videos he uploaded, his subscriber count refused to budge.
‘Damn it, what the hell am I supposed to do?’
He realized connections mattered even for YouTubers. Without mentions on bigger channels, growth seemed nearly impossible. Then he received a message from his former employer, IssueWrecker.
- Let’s work on something together.
The request was simple. Go to the cafe where Han Gaeul had filmed her ad and cause a scene by claiming everything was fake. In exchange, IssueWrecker would help grow his channel.
‘Shit, I can’t turn this down.’
Even fallen rich families lasted three generations. IssueWrecker had taken a huge hit after losing a bet to Han Gaeul last month. Nearly half their subscribers had left, and views had dropped sharply. Still, they remained one of the more successful cyber wrecker channels. Presell, who mainly did live streams, had been completely ruined—every time they went live, the chat filled with insults until streaming became impossible. IssueWrecker, however, only uploaded edited videos, so they simply ignored the bet and deleted negative comments while continuing their activities.
Though they had forgotten the bet itself, their grudge against Han Gaeul remained. They were trying to manufacture new drama. Jinsoo Woo accepted the offer and headed to the cafe.
Until he arrived, he hadn’t thought it would be difficult. Just make a fuss about the food tasting bad, kick the statue over, and leave. Simple. But once he got there, he realized this was anything but simple.
‘Damn it, this wasn’t part of the plan.’
He had intended to cause trouble quietly and slip out, but cameras were rolling everywhere. Combined, the subscribers of the people in this tiny cafe exceeded a million. If he caused a scene here, he might end up on national news instead of just YouTube tomorrow. He had wanted to be mentioned on famous channels, but not like this.
Still, he couldn’t just walk away. Whether it was news or YouTube, once he became famous, people would clap no matter what he did. Pretending to be a customer, he entered the cafe and ordered a slice of cake to go. After observing the atmosphere for a moment, he took a deep breath and shouted, “You’re all in on this together, aren’t you?!”
Countless cameras and eyes turned toward him. A man who looked like either the part-timer or the owner approached. From a distance he had seemed unremarkable, but up close the pressure was overwhelming. It felt like facing a tiger at the zoo.
“In on it together? If you’re suspicious, feel free to try lifting it yourself.”
The tone was calm and steady, yet somehow carried an oppressive weight. A primal fear crept up his spine, as if he would be devoured the moment he turned his back. Desperate, he blurted out whatever came to mind to keep causing trouble.
“You must have installed some kind of special device inside the store!”
“Then let’s try it outside. Here, give it a lift.”
The statue was carried outside. There shouldn’t have been any devices, so it should have been light, but it didn’t budge at all. He pushed, pulled, and even kicked it, but the statue remained completely still.
“Anything else you’d like to say? If you keep making a scene, I’ll report you for property damage and obstruction of business for kicking the statue.”
“Hic—hiccup!”
The threat of a police report made him hiccup involuntarily. Mocking laughter echoed from behind him. He had walked in confidently, but he left in shame. Without another word, he fled the cafe without looking back.
Once home, he set up his camera to criticize the cake and took a bite.
“Damn it, why does this taste so good too…”
Tears streamed down his face as he remembered his miserable situation. He had hoped to find some flaw in the taste, but the cake, soaked in his tears, was ridiculously delicious.