Chapter 68
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Translator: 8uhl
Chapter: 68
Chapter Title: Discovering the Fun of Acting
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Nam Yeonsu, who had been sitting comfortably in his chair, turned to me with exaggerated surprise, as if he hadn't even noticed me coming over and sitting next to him.
"Uh, uh?"
"See? It works when you just do it."
Nam Yeonsu wore a dreamy expression, then slowly nodded at my words.
"Yeah, it was really amazing. I've never acted so freely before. I still can't believe it."
"That's the magic of acting."
"Haha, is it? Siu, do you always act with this kind of feeling?"
"Feels good, right? Isn't that why we actbecause it's fun?"
"...Because it's fun. Yeah, you're right. I act because it's fun. I'm a top actor."
"Exactly."
Whether he's a top actor or not, I wouldn't know.
Nam Yeonsu, his face flushed with excitement, spoke enthusiastically.
His cheeks were rosy, beads of sweat dotting his forehead.
He finally looked his age of eight.
"Just now, the director told Woojoo to speak more slowly with emotion instead of that sharp tone. I thought, what if Haeseong talked like that?"
Nam Yeonsu finished reminiscing to himself and soon began excitedly spilling all his feelings from the shoot.
He looked just like a kid experiencing something fun for the first time, so I listened with a warm smile.
Ah, that scene.
I'd wondered why Haeseong came on to me stronger than expected.
Must be because he acted with that in mind.
"So that's why your tone changed back there?"
"Yeah! Did you feel it? When I did that, the lines suddenly came alive. Right? You felt it too, Siu?"
Nam Yeonsu chattered away in an excited tone I'd never heard from him before.
Normally, the moment shooting wrapped, he'd just stare at his script.
It was like a completely different kid.
"Yeah. Spot on. I felt great filming that scene too."
"Right! Exactly. I was bummed it got an OK on the first take."
It was probably because we only tweaked the tone slightly without any ad-libs.
Plus, Nam Yeonsu and I nailed Director Chai's directions perfectly.
Still, to think he'd feel disappointed that shooting ended early.
Seeing that, mischief sparked in me, and I grinned.
"Wow, is that the genius actor talking? I should tell the other directors."
"What! No, Siu. This is just between us."
At my teasing threat to tattle, Nam Yeonsu jumped up from his seat to stop me.
His plea that this was our secret sounded awfully earnest.
"The audio director was saying our shoot today dragged on so long his arm's gonna fall off. I should tell him it was your fault, Yeonsu hyung."
I kept teasing because it was so fun to watch.
Then the strength drained from Nam Yeonsu's hand gripping my arm.
Huh?
I turned to see him staring at me, his eyes brimming with reproach.
To think he'd look at his lifesaver like that.
"...Siu, you're starting to talk just like Woojoo."
"No way. That's your imagination."
"Really?"
"Really, really."
Nam Yeonsu tilted his head at my deadpan response and begged me not to tell anyone yet.
I magnanimously replied that I'd think about it.
"It's not that I talk like Woojoohyung, that's your mistakebut have you heard? Some actors get so immersed they start resembling their characters."
"Really?"
As I shared stories about other actors, Nam Yeonsu's eyes sparkled.
Seeing that, I finally knew for sure.
I'd suspected it from how he acted on set or how happy he was just now, but this kid...
He's dead serious about acting.
Maybe as much as I am?
"Yeah. Ever seen interviews with those legendary actors who can't shake off their roles for a while after filming?"
"Whoa. That's cool."
"Right?"
In the end, it was like declaring I'd tease Nam Yeonsu like we were rivals in the drama from now on.
But oblivious, he hung on my every word, full of wonder.
"You don't even watch actor interviews? They show them on TV."
"I didn't know they did that. Dad hates it when I just watch cartoons and play, so he never turns on the TV."
His dad must be insanely strict.
For a split second, Duke Hugo Battenberg came to mind, but I shook my head to chase away the gloomy thought.
"Aren't news shows educational? Ask him to let you watch a few hours a day. Oh! Say you wanna do monitoring."
"Monitoring? Oh, like what Director Chai does?"
Nam Yeonsu pointed in surprise at the production team huddled around the main monitor.
Well, that counts as monitoring too...
I pondered how to explain, then continued.
"Hyung, you've been in a ton of projects so far. Don't you watch them when they air?"
"Huh? Uh... I catch some sometimes. But I'm not old enough for the ratings, so I'm not allowed. Dad says he'll watch later and make me study it... Just the scenes he picks."
What kind of nonsense is this?
Why can't an actor watch his own work!
That was the decisive reason I chose drama over theater.
On stage, I can see my co-stars or the overall scene, but not my own performance.
Before, I never gave it a second thought.
I figured it was just how it was.
But after watching videos of Moon Heesung's stage recordings and then seeing my own acting filmed on camera at his house for the first time, my mind changed.
Sure, I had biases against dramas, but how appealing is it to watch myself act on TV!
In the TV dramas I binge-watch obsessively, no less.
So I started doing dramas to try something new and to see my own acting with my own eyes.
The result? Total satisfaction.
Watching my performance alongside everyone else was pure bliss.
And now he's saying he can't do that?
"Huh?"
"I-I mean, Dad watches and explains it to me instead. Like, 'You had few lines this episode,' or 'Lots of lines,' or 'This part wasn't great...'"
From the sound of it, it's not exactly praise...
I clicked my tongue inwardly.
Not even allowed to watch his own broadcasts.
Then he can't properly grasp his own expressions, face, or acting.
"Just tell him straight: 'I want to watch this drama myself.' It's a family drama, right? No edgy stuff, and I'm a big kid now, so I'll watch my own scenes. That's monitoring, isn't it?"
"Hmm, but isn't this rated 15?"
"...You can watch with parents."
Good lord.
Watching at home, and he's that strict about ratings? First time I've seen it.
It's not like going to a theater.
Even theaters let you in with mom, dad, or an uncle!
"Uh-huh. Do you monitor every day, Siu?"
"Yeah? Of course."
It's the most important thing.
What acting worked, what needed work.
Objectivity is crucial for actors.
Plus, there's one more thing I absolutely have to check.
How good I looked.
How much screen time I got today.
I'd watch the live broadcast every week, soaking up heaps of praise from my parents watching along.
That time has become my favorite part of the week lately.
Sometimes I had to watch our drama on set, but that was great too.
Uncle and staff showered me with praise instead of Mom and Dad.
Even on weekdays, I'd tune into reruns.
Mom loves it.
And monitoring lets me connect viewer reactions from articles right away.
Well, I don't just watch my own dramas.
"Got it. I'll ask him. If I say you do it too, Dad probably won't mind."
"Awesome! Let's keep acting like today from now on. It'll be super fun, right?"
Feeling like everything was sorted, I spoke lightly.
But Nam Yeonsu's face clouded over at my words.
"Uh-huh. I hope so."
Oh no.
I'd only torn up one script, not all of them.
He'd probably go home to stacks of new scripts covered in his dad's notes.
That bitter expression said he knew it.
Like he could already sense his future, as if today was his last.
I swallowed a sigh that bubbled up.
Couldn't sigh in front of Nam Yeonsu.
Having died and come back once, one saying hits home hard.
Overly common, but no one lives your life for you.
Might be too much for an eight-year-old like Nam Yeonsu.
Well, my double-life makes it hit harder for me.
But time flows equally for everyone.
It won't compensate for my lost years or take responsibility.
Flip side: I can't live anyone else's life for them.
"Still, I was a bit scared at first, but it was fun once I tried. Good thing I learned there's acting like this."
Watching Nam Yeonsu force a bright smile, I muttered without thinking.
"You're not someone's persona, hyung."
"Huh...?"
Nam Yeonsu blinked at my sudden words.
Persona.
In the film world today, it refers positively to an actor who's like a director's 'alter ego,' always collaborating.
But I recall a trivia show saying it's not such a great thing.
Heard it on TV I leave on all day, brushed it off then, but now it fits Nam Yeonsu perfectly.
They say this mask called a persona forms and strengthens from family and social upbringing.
Its origin: the masks actors wore in Greek theater.
But that's for the stage.
Offstage, shouldn't the actor remove the persona and live as 'themselves'?
Yet Nam Yeonsu always seemed to wear a mask.
Not one he chose, but forced on him by others.
In his case, his strict dad had built it solid.
Wearing a mask in daily life, living as someone's doubledoesn't make sense.
Wasting talent as a puppet, alter ego, or shadow? Nam Yeonsu's gifts are too precious.
"Do what you want, hyung. Today's expression was the coolest I've seen on you."
Frustrated and angry, I spoke more forcefully than usual.
"Like a top actor."
At my final words, Nam Yeonsu looked struck.
He fell silent, lost in thought.
His face seemed confused, maybe even sad.
You lose more staying trapped in the egg than breaking out.
But you'd have to hatch first to know.
Just like how I found new life after meeting theater and starting to act.
I hoped Nam Yeonsu would start fresh with acting too.
No way he could wait till his next life like me.
I didn't think one day would fully crack his shell.
But his expression suggested I'd at least made a golden dent.
I sincerely hoped Nam Yeonsu would hatch soon.