The Remake Begins
Regression. Five years ago. Just moments earlier I had been reading a novel. I must have dozed off halfway through, because the world around me suddenly changed. Refusing to accept reality, I shut myself inside my room. After several days had passed, I finally realized this place was absolutely not a dream. 'The sensations are far too clear for that.' If this were a dream, I should have woken up long ago. Yet no matter how many days went by, I remained trapped in this state.
I stared at my reflection in the mirror for a moment. 'This face is disgustingly handsome.' Features so sharp they looked like they had been meticulously sculpted. The proportions were so perfect that any professional model would have been sent running in shame.
“Huu… Yeah. Let’s try to think positively about this.”
One thing I had learned over those few days was that this world was none other than the novel I had been reading. In that case, I could treat the situation as being in my favor. I hadn’t finished the story, but I still possessed a decent amount of knowledge about it. Besides…
'It’s not like I possessed some random extra.'
Elric von Vandesar. In the novel, he was a supporting character who appeared as a degenerate noble professor. Of course, as a degenerate noble he was naturally a villain, but it was undeniable that he wasn’t the worst kind. In reality, the guy was the eldest son of the empire’s ducal house. 'Though the original body is beyond saving.' Still, with Elric’s wealth, even that problem could be fixed quickly enough.
'When I think about it this way, it’s actually not bad at all.'
Back on Earth I had no close friends or family. The only number saved in my phone belonged to my part-time boss. That was it. So there was no real reason to feel attached to my old life.
“Yeah. Since I’ve already fallen into a novel, let’s just start over fresh.”
That was what I had thought at the time. Roughly five years had passed since then. In those five years I had done incredibly stupid things. Back then I had trusted my half-baked knowledge and acted without thinking in this world. For example…
'Creating a weapon that could even crush the legendary holy sword used by the protagonist.'
Or using that same weapon to give the protagonist’s heroines a thorough “education.” And because of that education, they had suddenly fallen for me. 'Up to that point, it was still fine.'
The problem was that their obsession went far beyond simple affection. It was so severe it reminded me of that one anime moral: if you swing your dick around recklessly, you’re going to get fucked. 'Ugh. Just thinking about it gives me chills.'
In truth, for one of those five years I hadn’t advanced the story at all. Instead, I had spent it running away from the heroines who were obsessed with me. One of my actual students had even tried to lock me up. And another…
'Tried to force her sexual preferences onto me.'
There was even a heroine who had turned into a genuine masochist after my training. She would approach me with those crazed eyes, silently begging me to hit her. 'One of them pulled a sword on me while asking me to dance.' Under normal circumstances I would have overpowered them, but the problem was that the one swinging the blade was a Grand Master. A rare sword genius who was now called the Sword Saint. And that woman was obsessed with making me dance with her sword. How the hell was I supposed to not run away?
'There are a few more, but…' There was no end to it if I started listing them. In the first place, trying to explain it right now…
“I see. So you are the hero.”
At that moment, a woman narrowed her eyes at me. The horn on her forehead and the ominous demonic energy radiating from her made it obvious. She was undoubtedly the Demon King. 'Who would have thought the Demon King was a woman?'
She possessed bewitching beauty that could make anyone lose their mind. Her figure was perfectly proportioned—curves where they should be, elegance where they should be. Especially her chest, which seemed almost dangerously powerful.
“Well, you could say it’s something like that.”
“Hmm. But I remember the hero being young…”
“Sorry, but I’m not old.”
It wasn’t a lie. Excluding my previous life, I was currently in my mid-twenties. By Earth standards, I was still definitely young.
“I see. Well, let’s set that aside. By the way, what is that bamboo spear?”
“Huh?”
The Demon King was staring at the legendary holy sword I held and asking about it. I answered her question with full confidence.
“It’s obviously the legendary holy sword!”
“That? You’re calling that the legendary holy sword?”
She stared at me with an expression that practically screamed what kind of bullshit is this? Then she spoke again, face full of disbelief.
“No matter how you look at it, that’s just a plain bamboo spear… And how did you break into this place with that thing?”
“I beat the shit out of everything in my way, obviously.”
Of course, I had actually sneaked in until I reached the castle. As I was thinking that, an explosion suddenly rang out.
-KWAANG!
The sound of something exploding echoed in my ears. The Demon King must have heard it too, because she crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes.
“It seems your companions…”
“Shut up. Let’s finish this quickly!”
She looked like she had a lot she wanted to say, but there was no time. I had to defeat the Demon King before my eyes and return to Earth. 'Otherwise those obsessed heroines will catch me and drain me dry!'
Without a moment’s hesitation, I charged at her with the bamboo spear raised.
When I snapped out of my thoughts, I let out a hollow laugh at the sight of the Demon King collapsed with her eyes rolled back. 'No way. Is the Demon King this weak?' I had expected her to be incredibly strong, yet she had passed out after taking a few hits from the completely fair and impartial Jukchang. If I had known it would be this easy, I would have taken her down and returned to Earth much sooner.
While I was feeling dumbfounded, voices suddenly rang out.
“Professor Elric. I found you…”
“Please don’t run away, Professor.”
“I have been searching for you, young master.”
“Sir Elric, let us dance.”
“Professor. You will be happy if you come to me.”
At some point the heroines had cleaned up all the monsters outside the castle walls and entered the Demon King’s castle. 'Fuck. What the hell?!'
It was true that their individual strength was overwhelming. But there hadn’t been just one or two demons outside. There had been close to fifty thousand! Fifty thousand! And yet these five had broken through that overwhelming number and reached this place. 'Wait, are they actually the protagonists here?!'
What should I do? The reason I had believed I could defeat the Demon King and return was because of the message that had appeared on the first day. As I recalled, it had said:
Defeating the Demon King will grant you a reward selection.
The reward in question was either return or remaining in this world. Originally I had planned to choose to remain, but the moment I saw the heroines’ madness, I changed my mind. If I stayed here, I would undoubtedly end up captured and living as their prisoner. Therefore, I absolutely had to escape this place!
'But why isn’t the message appearing?!'
I had defeated the Demon King exactly as the message instructed, yet nothing had shown up. It was then that the heroines began slowly closing in on me.
“Young master, please don’t run away.”
“There’s a wall behind you anyway, isn’t there?”
“Come here. All you have to do is hit me, Professor.”
“Let us dance, Sir Elric.”
“It’s okay, Professor. I won’t hurt you.”
Their eyes were filled with madness. The moment they caught me, the consequences were painfully obvious. 'Fuck. Is this the end?!'
The instant I fell into despair, a beautiful notification sound rang in my ear.
-Ding!
Due to the author’s imperfect ending, a remake is now beginning.
An unexpected message appeared before my eyes. 'What? A remake?' In other words, it meant starting over from the beginning. Which meant regression. 'What the hell is this bullshit all of a sudden?!'
It was supposed to let me return after I defeated the Demon King. Instead, this author was starting a remake from the beginning. The moment I began cursing the author internally—
-Flash!
A pure white light suddenly burst from the message, enveloping not only me but all the heroines as well. After that, my vision went completely dark.
A sudden pure white light swallowed me. When I slowly opened my eyes again…
“This ceiling… isn’t unfamiliar.”
A familiar ceiling filled my vision. Seeing the same ceiling I had looked at five years ago, it seemed I had truly regressed. As proof of that, a system message appeared before me.
The remake has begun.
“Huu. Fuck. You said you’d let me return, you piece of shit author.”
The profanity slipped out before I could stop it. Then came the response.
I’m sorry. The readers kept leaving so many malicious comments.
The author sounded incredibly apologetic. Wait, because of some malicious comments…? While crazy women were trying to kidnap me, this bastard had regressed me over a few bad comments? He clearly had zero conscience.
“Wait, more importantly, you could send messages like this the whole time?!”
I’ve been able to do so from the beginning. I simply thought it would be better to watch quietly. Also, we can converse even if you speak only inside your mind.
What a thoughtful consideration, you bastard author! I cursed him internally and let out a deep sigh. Then I asked him a question.
'So what exactly did the readers say?'
Things like: why did the Demon King die so suddenly, what is this rushed development, how could the Demon King be defeated when the story has barely even started, and so on.
'Hmm…'
For some reason it felt like they were sniping at me specifically. I still didn’t understand why the author had possessed me in the first place, but it was my own fault for going along with it. 'Then why did you possess me?'
Possession stories were trending at the time…
'What a pathetic reason!'
The fact that the reason was simply “because it was trending” left me at a loss for words. Of course, I had thought possessing this body was a gain for me, but still.
'But did you really have to do a remake? Couldn’t you have just revised and edited it a little?'
Even an author cannot interfere with everything in this world.
'Hmm. I see.'
If that had been possible from the start, there would have been no reason to force a regression from the beginning. In other words, even the author wasn’t an omnipotent god who could do whatever he wanted. 'If I play my cards right, maybe I can return on my own?' I might even be able to get revenge on the author while I was at it.
Is it just me, or did I suddenly feel a chill run down my spine?
'Of course it’s just your imagination!'
It seemed he couldn’t read every single thought after all. Only when I had a clear intention of conveying something did it work. The author continued.
Anyway, as I said earlier, even an author cannot do everything. The same goes for ‘other authors’ as well.
'Hmm. Why are you emphasizing that?'
Well, that is…
'Why? Did something happen?'
Since I had regressed anyway, the yandere heroines who had been chasing me should be gone now. 'I swear I won’t act without thinking ever again!' The moment I made that firm resolution and smiled with deep satisfaction, another message appeared.
As a side effect of the remake, your heroines have also regressed while retaining their memories.
It seemed that even in this new round, I was fated to be unable to escape the heroines’ obsession. Shit.