How Much Longer — 2
Dreams are always sweet — and always, in the end, hollow.
That is why people rarely content themselves with a dream. More often, they let the world a dream shows them mend their hearts, and then go back to living in the real one.
But if even a dream offers no refuge, what, then, is such a person supposed to lean on?
Ever since that day, the Sword Saint Na Yerin's dreams had been nothing but darkness.
Before that day, reality had been so happy that she never dreamed at all.
Her birthday.
The day everyone in her sect had gathered to bless her.
That night was where the Sword Saint's unerasable nightmare began.
And so the nightmare was always the same.
She walked out of the darkness, and there before her appeared the Hongseong Sect.
And blood.
Her senior sisters. Her junior sisters. Her martial uncles.
At the far end of it all, where every one of them lay fallen coughing up blood, stood the Sacred Hall — the building where the Sect Leader of Hongseong resided.
And before it, a woman always sat waiting.
A woman with hair black as ink — a woman whose most striking feature was the crimson stains left upon her fallen Hongseong robes.
In the eyes that showed through her tangled hair dwelt weariness.
And gladness.
But the Sword Saint could not smile at her.
Though she had always smiled for her.
Though she had revered her and followed her all her life.
One glimpse of her master lying fallen there before the woman was enough to strip the Sword Saint of any expression at all.
The only words the woman ever offered were—
"...Why?"
It was always the same. Even knowing it was a dream, the Sword Saint asked, every single time.
And the answer—
never once did it come back to Na Yerin.
"......"
Slowly, the Sword Saint opened her eyes and looked around. She was in a small garden inside the Hongseong Sect — though in truth it was so bare a yard that calling it a garden felt almost embarrassing. A garden ought to have proper flowers and shrubs, ought it not? All that grew here were weeds and wildflowers, seeds that had drifted in on the wind at some point and taken root uninvited.
Even so, the Sword Saint loved this place.
She always had, ever since she was a child.
As always, she swept her vacant gaze over her surroundings, then bowed her head once more. It was all long past, yet what happened that day remained a scar carved deep into the Sword Saint's heart.
And that scar — each time that day came around, each time her birthday drew near — bared its hideous face a little more.
"Master!!"
The Sword Saint, who had been lost in thought staring down at her own hand, lifted her head slightly. Coming toward her where she sat on the garden bench was none other than Sa Yun — the last disciple Hongseong had ever taken in. Fine talent, and a character finer still. With this child, carrying Hongseong's will forward would be no trouble at all.
Toward the ash-grey-haired girl bounding up to her with a beaming smile, the Sword Saint reached out her hand.
"Hm?"
To the girl who drew near, puzzled by the gesture, the Sword Saint reached out — and slowly began to stroke her hair. The grey strands slipping between her fingers were soft as spun thread, and as a smile settled on the Sword Saint's lips, Sa Yun grew flustered.
"Oh! Th-thank you, Master."
"There now. What is it?"
"Ah — it's time for your meal, Master."
"Is it that time already..."
Lately it had grown hard to feel the passage of time at all. She knew why. That day was drawing near. The scar kept showing itself.
The Sword Saint smiled thinly and lifted her hand from Sa Yun's hair, and Sa Yun peered up at her searchingly for a moment before asking,
"Master... have you been unwell lately?"
"I have. It has been a little hard. But there is no need for you to worry. I am the Sect Leader of Hongseong, and your master."
The Sword Saint had never once hidden her condition from her disciples. When she struggled, she said she struggled; when a thing was beyond her, she said so; and when she could do something, she said she could. That was how it had to be — for she knew all too well what had happened the last time it wasn't.
Even beholding the strange sight of a master said to rank among the ten strongest under heaven admitting to weariness, Sa Yun had never once thought her weak. Whatever else was true, she was a master worthy of every measure of Sa Yun's respect.
"Shall we go?"
"Mm — let's be off. What's for supper this evening?"
"Barley rice, with changwi greens and osunchae! Oh! And Senior Sister Ryu Hyeon boiled eggs for us! And Senior Sister Hyeon Hwi made dumplings with pheasant, too!"
"My, my! A feast fit for royalty!"
"Yes, Master!"
"Come, then. Everyone will be waiting."
Cupping her disciple's hand gently in her own, the Sword Saint smiled — and with that alone, the scar within her heart began sinking, little by little, back into the dark.
But the Sword Saint knew.
Buried though it might be, this scar would never heal on its own.
I take up my brush on a day when the summer heat rages ever fiercer.
The first thing I must report is that something truly wonderful happened a short while ago. I simply had to tell you about it, Uncle.
I already told you I'd be visiting Chang'ungwan, didn't I? Hehe. Something happened there that made my heart soar.
It was that I, too, performed a true act of chivalry — as befits a disciple of Hongseong.
That was where I first learned that Demonic Cultists and monsters attack Chang'ungwan quite often. And it happened just as we arrived. Goodness — a Demonic Cultist actually brought jiangshi along to assault Chang'ungwan, if you can believe it!
It nearly turned into real disaster, but we held the jiangshi at bay, and everyone came through without a single injury. A true blessing, isn't it?
If you hadn't told me about that hidden realm, Uncle, so that my skills could grow, and if I hadn't obtained the sword, it would have been very difficult to stop them. Of course, Innkeeper Yu Wol's help counted for a great deal too.
Anyway — once we had beaten the jiangshi, Eldest Senior Sister Hong Ryeon finished off the Demonic Cultist. And then the child we rescued, and the child's father, called me a heroine of chivalry.
The spirit of Hongseong prizes chivalry above nearly all else. To act in a moment of crisis without sparing one's own life, and to move for the sake of duty rather than gain — that, they say, is chivalry.
Until now I never truly understood it, but that day I came to know, just a little, what chivalry means and what the spirit of Hongseong exists for.
Hehe. I had thought it would be nothing more than an outing, yet it became a wonderful experience instead.
If I keep growing little by little like this, will I one day become someone who can help others without any gain in return — someone like you, Uncle? I truly hope so.
The late-summer heat only grows fiercer by the day. Please take care of your health — and if anything ever weighs on you, Uncle, tell me whenever you like.
Because Heroine Sayun will come running to help you!
Ahaha... it's embarrassing even writing the word "Heroine." I'm not nearly at that level yet. But you'll forgive me, won't you?
Oh — and one more thing. Lately my master has been struggling a great deal... might there be some way I could comfort her? If it's no trouble, I would love to borrow your wisdom.
— From Sayun, who is always thinking of you, Uncle.
I set the letter down beside me and checked the box. Inside lay a worshipper's tablet engraved with Chang'ungwan's insignia.
I turned the tablet with its Eight Immortals emblem this way and that, set it down, and picked up the scented candle.
Haha. This was the one she picked out with me.
Back at the candle shop, she had grabbed it up, insisting it was the scent she liked best.
I never imagined she would send it to me.
In any case, I would accept it with gratitude.
— knock, knock.
Just then, a knock sounded at the door. I tucked Sayun's gifts away inside the safe, then spoke.
"Come in."
"What were you up to?"
"Just seeing to a little business."
Chae Jin tilted her head at the stack of letters lying on the desk — the ones the Courier Gate's couriers had delivered earlier, along with Sayun's.
"From the Cheonghoe Merchant Guild and Ha-O Gate? Do you have to go to Yangwi Fortress again?"
"I do have to go. But not on their account. The Cheonghoe letter concerns new goods — there's no real need to read it."
I set the first letter aside and unfolded the one from Ha-O Gate. Then I laughed.
"What is it? If it's good news, can't I laugh along with you?"
"Hm? Here, look—"
"You were reading it anyway. I'll just read along, that's all."
I held the letter open, and Chae Jin read over my shoulder as though it were the most natural thing in the world. A pleasant fragrance drifted from the long, silky hair spilling down beside me and tickled my nose.
"Hmm... a routine briefing, huh. So this is how you trade intelligence with Ha-O Gate?"
"It is."
Just as she said, the letter was a periodic report from Ha-O Gate on the current state of affairs. Ever since the New Four Black Lotus Alliance had taken a heavy blow a while back, their movements had dwindled — but the smaller and mid-sized factions, it seemed, were still locked in their endless wars of devour and be devoured. Left as it was, the letter warned, open war could break out within a few months.
Though it would not be on the scale I had first anticipated.
"That sounds dangerous. Does that mean our Seomhwachon falls inside the danger zone too?"
"Most likely. If the Monsoon Hall, the Blood Formation Sect, and the Nine Moons Hall mean to strike at Wang Hwi, the current leader of the Four Black Alliance, they will have to pass through Seomhwachon to do it. That said, their strength has been badly sapped, and with Hongseong Sect standing here, I doubt they would come recklessly..."
"And one must always prepare for the worst, no? Besides, there are still those Iron Blood Dan bastards who attacked Hongseong Sect before. For all we know, they'll slip in among them and join the assault."
"Just so. By the way, Lady Chae — I've been thinking of inviting the Sword Saint. Do you happen to know what she likes? With the situation this dangerous, we'll need to work hand in glove with Hongseong Sect to ride out the crisis, so I'd like to have her over for a meal, at the very least."
"...Ah. Now that you mention it, the Sword Saint hardly ever leaves Hongseong Sect, does she."
"You know of it too, don't you?"
"It's famous, isn't it? How the Sword Saint rarely sets foot outside Hongseong Sect."
She flashed a sly grin.
"Serve her wonderful food. They say she's fond of Dang-gwa — those sugar-glazed sweets — so why not simply give her Dang-gwa?"
"Isn't that treating her a touch too much like a child?"
"My father always calls the Sword Saint a child too, you know," Chae Jin said with a laugh.
And the next day, I put the very same question to Hong Ryeon, who had stopped by on her patrol.
"My master? There's nothing in particular she fancies... but she does love Dang-gwa, so why not finish the meal with Dang-gwa?"
How could the two verdicts be so perfectly identical?
There would be no trouble deciding what to serve, then... though it left one question — if I invited her, would she actually come?
At that question, Hong Ryeon lifted a hand to her lips, pondered a moment, then nodded.
"If you're the one doing the inviting, Innkeeper, she'll come — but ask her to come alone, and she won't."
"Is that so? Then..."
"Send the invitation saying you've asked a couple of other guests as well. Then Master will come too. Honestly, it's been hard on me as well — Master's been so downcast lately."
With that, Hong Ryeon gave me a lovely smile.
"Thank you, always. I'm forever in your debt."
"Oh, it's nothing. Not for something like this."
After all, I would be racking up plenty of debts of my own before long.
Helping one another along — that was simply how people lived together.