Too Much Carrot – I've Dug My Own Grave
"The carrot was too much, the carrot was too much. I've dug my own grave."
"Come on, come on, hurry up!"
"Set up the shade there, yes, yes, right there. Huh? Oh, perfect, good. Just a little more to the left!"
The castle servants bustled about, erecting various structures with machine-like precision, as if preparing for a grand festival….
"We're screwed…."
Chloe, tucked away in one corner of the crowd, rubbed her dry face in despair.
All she'd wanted was to defuse the situation by suggesting Rosetta join them, but looking back now, she realized accompanying the Grand Duchess wasn't as simple as she'd thought.
For starters, escorts were mandatory. And they couldn't be half-hearted ones—no, at minimum, it had to be the knight commander level.
"I believe this is our first time meeting like this. Allow me to introduce myself again. I'm Brumen."
"Ah, yes…. Hello. I'm Chloe."
Brumen, the Second Knight Commander of the Grand Ducal House. With such an important figure gracing the event, an impromptu introduction was in order.
"Tch…."
"What's wrong, miss?"
"You really don't know?"
"Pardon?"
"Forget it, I'm going to Viola."
"Eek…."
Marian watched Chloe shake hands with Brumen, her eyes narrowed in a glare, but she didn't want to whine and risk Chloe drifting further away. Still, watching her chat with some strange uncle she barely knew was unbearable, so she bolted toward Viola like she was fleeing.
Once Marian was out of earshot, Brumen, who'd been subtly gauging the mood, cautiously spoke up.
"By the way, what exactly does this game of hide-and-seek entail?"
"Oh, that? Mind if I ask why you're curious? You'll see it soon enough anyway…."
"Of course. I've trained quite a few young masters and ladies myself…. Unfortunately, the results weren't great, and there's a world of difference between watching with understanding and watching blind. I'd like to learn."
"Ah…."
Brumen. Apparently, he'd been the one teaching self-defense to Rosetta's five step-siblings.
In that case, it made sense—he'd naturally want to study Chloe's methods, especially after the first five had gone ahead and failed. The Evergreen Grand Duchy would endure long after his retirement, and future heirs would face assassination threats too.
To help them withstand those threats efficiently, to wash away the stain of failing to protect Rosetta's five children.
Maybe he even dreamed of penning a manual or two on countering assassins before hanging up his sword.
Chloe pondered briefly, then nodded and began.
Brumen didn't seem to have ulterior motives.
"The lesson I've prepared is ultimately for dealing with assassins, from an alchemist's perspective. However…."
"I'm a knight. I know. I taught the three young masters and two young ladies the knightly way. But none of them could fend off an assassin."
The sturdy eldest and second sons had weathered a few attempts at first, but they'd broken in the end.
"Frankly, the knightly methods aren't ideal against assassins."
A seasoned knight might manage, but children of nobility—trained for barely a decade, and not even full-time—building their foundation the slow-burn knightly way…?
Against assassins who pulled every dirty trick in the book, it was no wonder they couldn't hold out.
"That's why I'm hoping to learn this time. Not for the current generation, perhaps, but for the future—I plan to suggest alchemists or mages as tutors for the young masters and ladies."
Of course.
"That's only if my methods prove effective, right?"
"True enough. After all, the orthodox path is still the knightly one."
"Well, I can teach martial techniques. I know plenty on that front."
"I know. You're a former assassin, after all."
"And yet I didn't teach them. Why do you think that is?"
Brumen tilted his head, prompting an answer, and Chloe laid out her plan.
"The key is approaching it as a game."
"A game?"
"Boys love playing with swords and such, but girls often don't. It's too dangerous from the start."
"Fair point. Even Marian's two half-sisters took quite a while to pick up a sword…."
Exactly.
"So, I create an environment where they get familiar with alchemical artifacts—ones you can just throw to use."
It was considerate of the young masters and ladies, swamped with etiquette, politics, and estate management lessons.
Chloe knew the basics of the knightly path: mana cultivation, building mana reserves, forging sword aura, honing battle sense, and so on…. Honestly, it was all too clichéd.
Way too complex for kids under ten to start.
"My upper limits as a martial artist may be capped, but for self-defense, an alchemist's skills are plenty. Assassins don't lug around weapons of mass destruction, after all."
"Well…."
"An alchemist who gets hooked and studies harder than anyone? I guarantee…."
No assassin will touch them.
Swallowing the rest, Chloe glanced toward Marian, who was sneaking sips of black tea from Viola.
Marian had already reached the point of experimenting with alchemy and crafting artifacts on her own.
"She might beat me today."
"Hm…. Is that a good thing?"
"Absolutely. If she can catch someone like me—a top-tier assassin—then she'll handle just about any threat."
Chloe hoped Marian would succeed in hunting her and claim that wish ticket.
Even if she had no clue what form that wish might take.
#
"This should about cover it."
"Don't you think you've gone a bit overboard, Duchess?"
"When the lady of the house graces us with her presence, this is the least we can do. You know nothing of dignity—and it's becoming a problem."
"Haha…."
While Chloe chatted idly with Brumen, the viewing platform for Rosetta to watch her and Marian's game had been completed in no time.
With the castle's manpower mobilized en masse, it featured not just a sunshade but plush sofas too….
A veritable portable villa, built solely for Rosetta.
Is this the kind of power a Grand Duchess wields, commanding people like this…?
Chloe was struck anew by how the Grand Duchess rivaled the Grand Duke in authority, as Rosetta sipped her tea and shot her a glance.
That look….
After all their time together, Chloe could read it clearly: What are you waiting for? Get on with it.
"Shall we start then, miss?"
"Yeah!"
With Marian's bold reply behind her, Chloe took position at the center of the training grounds.
Marian, like last time, wore a practical dress and stood opposite her.
No pants, for realism—when facing assassins outside the castle, an Evergreen lady like her wouldn't don trousers abroad.
Anyway.
"You know the rules, right, miss?"
"Yep. I catch you, I get my wish ticket."
"And if I get close enough to touch you like last time, you lose?"
"Don't worry, you won't catch me. Now…."
"Now?"
"I've got something for that."
Now she had a way to heal her.
The guilt of zapping Chloe with lightning had eased a bit.
Swallowing those wicked thoughts, Marian gripped the thunder orb she'd compressed to extreme levels over the past few days.
Ready to unleash at any moment.
"This time it'll really hurt, so don't resist too much…. The more you fight, the worse you'll get it."
"We'll see. I'm not one to take a hit lying down."
But neither Chloe nor Marian gave the signal.
The two traded subtle barbs of pride, awaiting the word from the eldest here: Rosetta.
"What are you waiting for? Begin."
At Rosetta's sudden, nonchalant command, Chloe's evasion began.
Getting close now would just trigger the shrimp-catching seaweed artifacts—she'd drop one and get bound instantly.
Plan: keep distance, play for time, drag it into an attrition war until Marian's artifacts ran dry….
"I failed to double the compression!"
"That…."
As if mocking Chloe's attrition strategy, Marian revealed her transparent artifact pouch, plunged her hand in, and hurled thunder orbs wildly.
"But I settled for 1.7 times and boosted the quantity instead!"
"Ah, wait…."
Dozens of orbs crackling with lightning rained down on Chloe like a storm, leaving her tongue-tied on how to dodge.
"Whoa…. That'll sting…."
Rosetta, well-versed in magic, instantly gauged the vicious zap packed into those thunder orbs.
She clocked it, but….
"What'll she do? Brumen?"
"Pardon, is it dangerous?"
"Very. Assassins are walking blades."
"Ah…."
"Even if just one blade on her body survives, a tenth of that barrage hitting bare skin would knock her out."
It wasn't her taking the strikes, after all.
She cackled with Brumen, who'd guarded her for decades, while eyeing Marian's expression.
"Why's she so ruthless? She adores Chloe usually—did they make a bet or something?"
Drawing on her experience raising five stepchildren, Rosetta pierced the reason in an instant.
"The carrot was too much, the carrot was too much. I've dug my own grave."
Mothers always knew.