The First Trial (2)
“…Rachel?”
Edwin could only murmur his nanny’s name in a daze.
Meanwhile, Rachel hurled her entire weight into the flank of the magic beast as it lunged toward the prince, rolling across the dirt the instant she struck. While the beast stumbled, thrown off balance by the impact, she seized the opening and went on the offensive without a breath of hesitation.
Her movement was astonishingly fluid and swift—so blindingly fast it seemed impossible for a mere human. In a flash, Rachel drove her dagger deep into the creature’s slick, leathery neck.
Kyaaaagh—!
Unfortunately, far from severing its breath, the blow only stoked the monster’s fury. Contrary to its appearance, the creature's hide was remarkably thick; the dagger, driven in with all her might, had gouged nothing more than a shallow scratch. It had done virtually no real damage.
Yet Rachel did not falter.
Far from panicking, she lunged at the beast once more. Slipping effortlessly beneath snapping fangs and raking talons, she drove the blade into the exact same spot again and again.
Thud. Thud. Crack.
She did not stop until that tiny scrape tore open into a gaping, ruined wound. Her hands were relentless.
Locked in savage combat with the monster, she looked like a wild predator herself.
It’s like… watching two beasts fight to the death.
While Edwin watched in stunned disbelief, the battle finally reached its end.
Thump—!
The creature’s massive bulk crashed heavily to the ground, kicking up a cloud of dust. The victor standing over the carcass was his nanny, Rachel.
“Tsk.”
The dagger she had taken from the bandit was chipped beyond repair. It had already been worn down, and forcing it through such dense hide had ruined the edge entirely. Tossing the useless blade onto the dirt, Rachel turned around.
Edwin was staring at her, his face pale and bewildered. The boy looked in even worse shape than when she had first found him in the imperial palace. Twigs and soil tangled his hair, his hands were bloody and scraped, and the hems of his trousers and boots were shredded to ribbons.
“Rachel… how did you…?”
Tears still brimmed in Edwin’s wide, trembling eyes. Having just stared death in the face, such a reaction was only natural.
“What do you mean, ‘how’? I ran.”
“No, that’s not what I meant…”
Her deadpan answer left him thoroughly flustered. Naturally, he wanted to know how an ordinary nursery maid had managed to bludgeon a ferocious magic beast to death with her bare hands. But she had no intention of indulging his curiosity.
I can never tell him. Not in a million years.
How could she explain to a child that she wasn't actually Rachel, but the reincarnated leader of the continent’s deadliest assassination syndicate? In the end, she deliberately changed the subject.
“First, take your punishment.”
“What? Ow!”
Rachel rapped him sharply on the crown with her knuckles, and Edwin clutched his head in shock. He blinked up at her with wide, round eyes, his mouth working silently as if he had no idea what he had done wrong.
“Who told you to pull such an absurd stunt? Acting as bait against a magic beast—did Your Highness honestly believe you had the skill to survive that?”
“I…”
“No, that wasn't even an attempt to lure it! What Your Highness did was pure suicide! Why on earth would you do something so utterly insane? Did you already forget the advice I gave you regarding Prince Lloyd?”
At her cutting, razor-sharp scolding, Edwin hunched his shoulders, shrinking into himself.
“There is nothing in this world more worthless than dying a dog’s death!”
Under normal circumstances, she would have pulled back here, but right now she couldn't contain the fury surging in her chest. Throwing himself in front of a magic beast when he didn't even have the power to protect his own skin—had he completely lost his mind?!
“Do you value your one and only life so cheaply?!”
It had been a very long time since she had shouted this loudly. Edwin shrank back further, his eyes round with terror as he curled his small frame inward.
“Why aren't you answering me?! Say something! Your Highness has a mouth, doesn't he?!”
Edwin took a long, shuddering breath, his lower lip quivering. When he finally spoke, his voice was thick and congested, as if he were choking down a flood of tears.
“I… I don't understand why you’re so angry with me!”
Scrubbing frantically at his cheeks with the back of his hand, Edwin choked out the words.
“I just… I wanted to be helpful, too! Everyone always gets hurt and dies because of me! I hate it! I can't stand seeing it happen anymore!” His frail, shaking voice rose in pitch until it broke into an agonizing cry. “It’s all because of me! It's always my fault, so this time I didn't want it to happen! I just wanted to help! But I can’t do things the way you do! I thought about it a lot before I did it!”
“Thought about it? You thought it wouldn't matter if someone like you died—is that what you call thinking?”
“That’s…!”
Edwin hung his head, unable to answer.
Looking down at the crown of his golden head, Rachel kept her voice steady. “I crossed paths with Leo on my way here. The boy was bawling his eyes out, terrified that Your Highness was in grave danger.”
She had also heard the parting words Edwin had left behind—that unlike him, Leo was someone the villagers needed, so Leo had to survive and run.
“…Leo was?”
Edwin seemed unable to fathom that someone he had met for the first time today had worried so desperately on his behalf.
“He watched you get hunted by a magic beast right before his eyes. It would be stranger if he weren't worried.”
Rachel crouched down in front of the boy, who remained staring intently at the tips of his shoes.
“Your Highness, you said you didn't understand why I was angry.”
Sniffling, Edwin offered a tiny nod.
Rachel drew a small tin of ointment from her pocket and gently took his right hand, turning his palm upward. Fresh blood still oozed from a deep laceration where he had fallen against a jagged stone.
“The reason I was angry with Your Highness is, as I said before, because you threw yourself forward without taking proper measure of your enemy.”
Courage and recklessness were divided by a paper-thin margin. And that single sheet of paper was often the difference between life and death. Those who walked the threshold between living and dying had to hone the insight to tell the two apart.
“And above all…” Rachel smeared the salve gently over the raw cut. It was deep enough that it would likely leave a scar. “…I was angry because Your Highness was carrying such thoughts in your head.”
Before he was an imperial prince, the Edwin standing before her was merely a child. For a harmless, vulnerable boy who had neither the strength to protect himself nor the maturity to discern good from evil to already deem himself worthless was unbearable. The world was crawling with wretched, corrupt adults who truly deserved to die; she could not accept that this innocent child viewed himself that way.
“What I mean is, not a single one of the tragedies you have endured in your life was your fault. So stop blaming yourself.”
“But…”
“There are no ‘buts,’ Your Highness.” Rachel cut him off with firm resolve. “Your only mistake today was carelessly provoking that magic beast. Do you understand?”
Edwin opened his mouth to protest, but catching the sharp, uncompromising glint in her eyes, he quickly nodded instead.
People often said that every choice carried its own consequences. But until now, this boy had never even been granted the freedom to make a choice. Yet here he was, taking the blame for everything that had ever gone wrong, convinced it was entirely his responsibility.
Perhaps I was a bit too harsh during that incident with Lloyd.
Back then, she hadn't planned on looking after Edwin and Emilia indefinitely, so she had deliberately maintained a cold distance to avoid becoming attached.
But the situation has changed now.
Rachel pulled out a clean linen handkerchief and carefully bandaged Edwin’s wounded palm.
“Hey, Rachel…” Edwin murmured softly, staring down at his wrapped hand for a long moment. “…I want to become strong like you.”
Her hands paused. Rachel looked up, meeting his gaze directly. Frustration and desperate yearning flickered together within his clear blue eyes.
“Do you think… I can?”
“Your Highness, once we return…” Rachel placed a steady hand on the prince’s shoulder as he blinked back fresh tears. “I will make sure you are able to make your own ‘choices’—whatever they may be.”
Edwin tilted his head, puzzled by her cryptic phrasing.
“What does that mean?”
“It means…” Rachel flashed him a fierce, confident grin, baring her teeth. “…that I will make Your Highness stronger than anyone else.”
Shortly after wrenching the prince from the very jaws of the magic beast, they arrived back at the cabin, where Sage greeted them with infuriating calm.
“Well, aren't you both alive? That’s what counts, isn't it?”
Even after hearing that two young boys had nearly been devoured alive, Sage remained completely unperturbed.
“For someone who deliberately drove them into the jaws of death, you don't show an ounce of remorse.”
“Deliberately?!” Sage barked, bristling at Rachel's accusation. “Hey! Eccentric as I may be, I’m not some lunatic who feeds little children to monsters on purpose! My head is perfectly fine, thank you very much!”
“Your Highness, my apologies. I overlooked the fact that this man is half out of his mind. Let us leave. We will find another master for you.”
“Are you ignoring me right to my face?! When an elder speaks, you youngsters ought to—!”
Meanwhile, Edwin had turned pale as a ghost, clearly reeling from the exchange unfolding before him.
“Then… did you really send Leo and me out there knowing a magic beast would appear…?”
“Good grief, I said that wasn't it! Now even a wet-behind-the-ears brat is ignoring my words?!” Sage pounded his chest in frustration, but after a moment, his scowl settled into dead seriousness. “Fine. Let’s say, for argument's sake, that I sent you out there knowing full well a beast was prowling. What of it?”
“Pardon?”
“In this world, what test is worth its salt without an ordeal? Am I wrong?” Sage narrowed his eyes, peering down at Edwin, who was far smaller than him. “If you had used Leo as a shield and run away, I would have grabbed you by the scruff of your neck and tossed you into the beast’s mouth myself.”
At the blunt declaration, Edwin let out a startled hiccup.
“And naturally, if you’d charged the beast head-on and died, that would have been the end of it. I’ve got no desire to take an idiot as my disciple.”
“I suppose it never crossed your mind that they might die while trying to escape,” Rachel interjected coldly. “Some Great Sage you are.”
“I don't accept unlucky brats as disciples either. Their rotten luck rubs off on me.”
What an insufferable, peerlessly crazy old bastard.
While Rachel ground her teeth in silence, Sage turned his gaze back to Edwin.
“Leaving that aside, did you find the answer to my question, young prince?”
“What?”
“Didn't I tell you to prove whether you’re worth teaching?”
Prove something in this state? Prove what, exactly? Rachel thought, her temper flaring. She was sorely tempted to prove that even a renowned sage would drop dead if a magic beast tore his throat out.
“Your Highness, I believe my judgment was flawed.” Rachel shot the cantankerous old man a scathing glare and stepped in front of Edwin, shielding him from view. “A creature like this is utterly unfit to be your mentor. Let us seek someone—”
Just then, a small, resolute voice spoke up from behind her. It was Edwin.
“I kept thinking about it. I still don't quite understand what kind of ‘anyone’ you were referring to.”
Edwin’s face was intensely grave.
“But if ‘anyone’ means someone who is no different from everyone else, then I…”
His vivid blue eyes looked up, meeting Sage’s gaze squarely.
“I don't think I can become your disciple. I'm sorry.”