A Useful Bitch Accountant (10)
Working here for just one day, and already demanding a raise first thing in the morning?!
"What the hell? Why bring up pay out of nowhere? You thinking about money before even starting the job?"
Pelle said nothing, just glaring at me. I finished up the dish I was making anyway. Once I'd stir-fried it to perfection and moved the whole pot to the side counter, Della took over plating the food. Pelle was still standing there, so I set down the ladle and faced her.
"What? What's the problem?"
"I'll handle all the ingredient and liquor inventory, receipts and disbursements, and ordering. So give me a raise."
"Out of the blue? I can manage that on my own right now."
"Not for long."
I waited silently for her to continue. She didn't hesitate once I gave her the opening.
"This city's just starting to grow, from what I've heard. And look at the hall already packed this morning. Soon enough, you won't be able to—"
"Boss."
"...You won't be able to handle it alone."
Pelle's words were half true, half bullshit. If I busted my ass, I could manage the kitchen and inventory. But I'd retired to run this inn leisurely, not slave away like a dog.
"So you're saying you'll take it over. Makes sense—I'll end up handling ingredients anyway with the preservation ritual."
"Hm... Fair point. But there's one issue."
"What?"
"How do I know I can trust you with all that?"
As if she'd expected it, Pelle fired back immediately.
"I worked in the Demon King's Castle logistics department."
"Yeah...? Ammugar said you were just clerical staff."
"He was a legion commander. Desk jockeys all look the same to guys like him."
"Hm... How do I verify that?"
Without a word, Pelle shoved the paper she'd been carrying at me. I took it and was mildly surprised. It was a form in a layout I'd never seen before, listing every ingredient and liquor in the inn at a glance. Not fully filled out yet, but even the table format screamed pro.
This had to be legit—Demon King's logistics was the core of the whole army's supply chain. Even a lowly clerk there would outclass most.
But how'd she end up with Ammugar...? Come to think of it, she built the Demon King's tomb. Why stick with a traitor like him? Not the time to ask, though. If Pelle handled this, I'd have way more breathing room.
"Alright, trial run: You manage it for a month. If it's good, you're full-time with a matching raise."
"Yes."
Pelle snatched the paper back with a curt reply. That rude bitch... She wandered the inn inside and out with a bored expression, helping Della and Idi serve food and greet guests when busy. Still expressionless and icy, but at least she found work to do. Not a total waste—just a freezer with attitude. Could be useful after all.
After the morning rush, Pelle holed up in the third-floor dorms. Idi checked and said she was scribbling at a desk, so I left her to it. Past lunch, in the slow afternoon, Della, Idi, and I sat trimming veggies at a table.
"Hey, Idi. Pelle still up on three?"
"Yeah... Told her to come eat, but she said later..."
"You two must chat a bit, at least."
Idi giggled while chopping.
"Kinda... Demons and black mages get each other..."
"Black magic and demons connected?"
"Dunno the roots, but... We're both the bad guys, right?"
"Fair."
Della's eyes went wide beside us.
"What? Why's Idi bad?"
"Black mages are always bad..."
Della glared at Idi, eyes fierce.
"Don't say that. Other black mages maybe, but not you. Sweetest, kindest person ever."
Della hugged Idi tight, rubbing her cheek.
"Feel how soft and squishy!"
"Hehe... Hot... Sweaty..."
"Sweat's fine. You don't smell at all."
"Thanks, Della..."
I clicked my tongue. Better Della didn't know what Idi did for those Sansa heads. Not my place to judge her past anyway. As long as she listens and works hard, that's it.
"Oh, right, Idi. Can you make one more statue?"
"Huh? Why...?"
"Monsters might show up again. Backup for when I'm out."
"Ah... Guard statue. I could handle light monsters myself..."
"What if you're not here? Della alone?"
"True... Okay, one more. Monster detection only..."
Idi nodded, mumbling to herself.
"But not hideous like the one outside. Make it normal."
"Why...? Thought that was good..."
"Me too. I liked it."
Idi and Della chimed together.
"It's well-made, but... that thing between the legs? No."
"Th-that...? I thought it was the key feature..."
Idi blushed, flashing a creepy smile. So sinister even Della pulled away a bit.
"Anyway... Consult me first next time. Got it?"
"Yeah... Talk costs then..."
I stared at her. Idi met my eyes, stubbornly holding her ground.
"Gotta be bigger for monsters... At least ten gold coins...?"
"We'll see. You got no place to spend anyway."
"I... do..."
"On what?"
Idi fidgeted. Della jumped in.
"Boss, even employees have privacy."
"Fine, sure."
Della cooed and hugged her. Footsteps came from the stairs. Pelle descended alone, stack of papers in hand, approaching us. Della shrank under her cold gaze. Pelle stopped before me, offering the papers.
"What?"
"Read."
I set down the knife and scanned it. A calendar crammed with tiny writing—daily breakfast, lunch, dinner menus.
"Menu plan?"
Easy mass-prep dishes, simple sourcing and cooking. Logistics pro, alright—military feeding experience.
"Why now?"
"Predicts supply needs."
"Hm. Not bad."
I passed it to Della. She skimmed: simple, tasty, good. Idi licked her lips: "Wonder what it tastes like..." Pelle handed another—a table for ordering based on guest numbers. Efficient as hell. No wonder the Demon King's army was top-tier. No allied legions stood a chance.
Should've captured some staff alive... Wasted potential.
"Pelle, one question."
"What."
"Can't you just stockpile, preserve, and cook whatever?"
"Build a huge warehouse out back then. Current one's too small."
"Hm."
"Mood-based menus hit limits. Hall full, you'll chase ingredients."
No hesitation. I trusted her—already thought the same, just testing if she'd planned for it.
"Good. We'll do it."
"No meddling midway."
"Deal."
Pelle vanished outside like she'd appeared. Heading to the stables, from the window.
"Phew... Pelle scares me."
Della relaxed, sighing. Idi petted her head.
"Della's nice and pretty. Pelle'll warm up soon..."
Della hugged back tight.
"You're my second favorite."
"Who's first...?"
Della buried her face in Idi's ample chest, giggling instead.
Evening, Mollo arrived with his order. He always pushes for dinner and a stay—timing it late on purpose. Unloading, Idi hovered in the yard, fidgeting.
"What're you doing? Prep dinner."
"Um... Ordered something too..."
"What?"
"R-respect my privacy..."
Mollo pulled out a small wrapped box.
"Your order, Idwild."
"Th-thanks, Mollo..."
Idi snatched it, paid, hugged it tight, and bolted inside.
"Mollo, what was it? What'd she order?"
"Heh. Respect employee privacy, Bertrand."
What creepy shit did that black mage buy...? I called Pelle to intro Mollo—future supplier liaison. Mollo eyed her horns, startled, but pro merchant: no comment. Pelle coldly handed him a memo for next delivery, then left.
"She's always like that. Ignore it."
"No issue. Seen all types in trade. But... horns?"
"Demon."
"Some demons survived, huh. Castle's gone, so inn work to eat."
"Something like. Come in, eat."
Celereja closed the temple and returned. Spotting me, she blushed and smiled shyly.
"I'm back..."
"Welcome. Line for holy healing."
"Y-yes... Prep now..."
Then she saw Pelle at the bar with ledgers. Face twisted like a predator sighting prey.
"That damn demon bitch...!"
Pelle ignored it perfectly, fueling Celereja's rage—she looked ready to blast holy light.
"Saintess, do it quick and eat."
I wrapped an arm around her. She flushed beet red, nodding meekly.
"A-ah... Yes..."
She sat primly by the fireplace; patients lined up. Which Celereja is real? The bitchy one hating demons, or the shy one with me? Maybe both. Good she listens to me, at least. Rejecting her that night? She'd have holy-beamed Pelle's tits by now, mediator or not.
Rule one: Eat when you can.
That night, Della entered post-shower, towel-drying her hair. Door open, crash and rustle—Idwild's blanket billowed on the bed, then settled into a huddled shape. Empty box and lid on the floor nearby.
Obvious it was Idi under there. Della grinned mischievously, sneaking over and yanking the blanket.
"Idi! What're you— Uh...?"