Rosens Full Course (2)
Hildeva's pallor was unlike anything I'd ever seen before. Not even back when she'd mistaken me for some high-and-mighty noble long ago. Not when she'd been imprisoned in Baron Benson's territory on the brink of death, nor when Grancis's merchant company had nearly razed Rosens to the ground.
Compared to her current complexion, those moments almost seemed calm.
What the hell could be going on?
If I had to guess, it was probably about the permanent dimensional gate. Hmm... Did something go wrong diplomatically with Tripolga?
"Your face looks awful. What's wrong?"
"Bertrand..."
Hildeva let out a long, trembling sigh.
"You thinking we might have to go to war with Tripolga or something?"
I tossed it out as a joke, but she didn't crack a smile.
"Thankfully, that's not an issue... They're treating it like it never existed in the first place... The foreign affairs office decided to bury it entirely..."
"Good to hear. So why do you look like you're about to pass out?"
"It's... It's..."
Hildeva trailed off, pressing a hand to her forehead like she was dizzy. It was clear I wouldn't get anything out of her, so I turned to the deputy mayor who'd come with her.
The deputy looked incredibly uncomfortable as he spoke up.
"Her Majesty the Queen... She's personally coming to inspect."
"Ah, damn."
Elua's coming here herself?
"Why? What's the problem?"
"Nothing like that... As the kingdom's first monster zoo, she wants to tour it personally and offer her encouragement..."
Haha. Yeah, right... She's got a real talent for making people's lives hell.
I mirrored the deputy's expression, rubbing my chin.
"Hmm... Yeah..."
"It's a burden, isn't it, Balder? We're feeling it too."
"I bet. One word from the queen, and you bureaucrats lose your heads."
My awkward history with Elua aside, my mind was already spinning with everything that needed doing. A mentally ill self-harmer wasn't just visiting—she was the kingdom's highest authority descending on an inn. A royal visit meant at least a hundred essential attendants. Add in ministers and earls or higher from the noble council dispatched to the palace. And that was just the start.
For security, they'd lock down the monster zoo and all inn facilities. The losses from that alone... And any unlucky guests caught in it would be stuck in their rooms until she left.
Aigoo, my head... A king should be too busy for a backwater like this!
"Any plans or detailed schedule come through yet?"
"Nothing firm. Just that she's coming sometime."
"When?"
"That's..."
The deputy clammed up, and Hildeva took over.
"Tomorrow."
"That crazy bitch...! Er, sorry. Not aimed at you, Mayor."
Now I understood why Hildeva looked like death warmed over. A sudden royal visit was bad enough—tomorrow was insane. Royal processions were usually planned three months in advance. No wonder her mind was unraveling.
"Hoo... Bertrand... Did I commit some huge sin in a past life or something?"
Hildeva muttered in resignation.
"First posting's a ghost town raided by monsters whenever... I catch a breath, get chased north, kidnapped mid-way... Nearly lose the city to a caravan... Dragons flying around... And now the queen herself..."
Listening to her, Hildeva really had the worst luck. Events others might never face in a lifetime, she'd endured multiple times as an administrator.
I patted her slumped shoulder.
"We'll get through this one too. We'll do our best, so don't worry too much."
A faint light finally returned to her face.
"Hearing that eases my mind a bit. Come to think of it, all those messes I just complained about... You stepped in and..."
Hildeva glanced around, mindful of the onlookers, and trailed off.
"Yeah. So this'll be fine too."
She nodded with a soft smile at my assurance.
I'd boldly assured Hildeva, but the moment the officials left, I called an emergency staff meeting.
Elua was a lunatic. Not figuratively—she had actual mental illness. The scars on her wrists and neck proved it.
So who knew what freakout she'd pull at the monster zoo? She might barge into the inn, demand to see the staff rooms, or open basement and storage doors. With her twisted feelings for me, she could grab any excuse to torment me. Hell, she might even point at Idi's chest and complain it was too big.
Elua was capable of that.
But we couldn't tear the place apart for a full deep clean by morning. That's not why I gathered everyone.
It was to shut their mouths.
"So, if the queen asks about your relationship with me, what do you say?"
"Employer and employee, per our contract."
"Exactly. And don't you dare say stuff like 'Our boss is the best in the world' or 'He's so handsome.' That'd be a disaster."
"Bullshit..."
Atergar snorted from the sidelines.
"Why do we have to say that? She might not even talk to us, but what's wrong with it anyway?"
Marim tilted her head, utterly baffled.
"Don't argue—just do what I say. Got it?"
"Hmm... Weird. Saying the staff get along great should be a good thing, right?"
"Kid, listen for once."
I flicked her forehead, and she exploded in anger. Atergar cackled mockingly. The two pint-sized redheads bickering really did make them look like feuding sisters.
"What about me?"
Francois raised her hand slightly.
She'd met Elua before, at the late king's funeral. I'd disguised her as my wife to get into the palace.
"Hmm. She probably knows you're staff here. Palace intel isn't that soft."
"Got it. But if she asks why the deception..."
"I'll handle it. Don't worry."
Everyone else seemed fine...
"Saintess. The cardinal might come tomorrow too."
Celereja, sitting apart from the staff, flinched.
"The... the cardinal...?"
"High chance. I asked him personally before, so he'll probably tag along."
I glanced at Idi, who beamed back happily.
"Stay at the inn tomorrow. City's only cleric—you'll have to greet him if he shows. If not, no issue."
"A... alright... Then... um... I'll tidy the temple first..."
Celereja stammered, then bolted out the door like her chair was on fire.
"Cardinal's a big deal? Saintess looks terrified."
Della's curiosity prompted Francois to explain.
"No way! The highest in the church?!"
Della finally noticed the open inn door, her face pitying.
"Poor thing..."
Pelei's expression soured at the cardinal mention. So did Kosa's, quietly in the corner. One was a demon, public enemy until last year. The other bore a demon curse.
Legally, Pelei and other demons were fine. Kosa had the Demon Seal Mandala, and the Goddess had handled that.
If the cardinal spouted nonsense, we'd just explain.
Dwarves were good... Mideronde beyond the gate was untouchable by Elua anyway. Atergar just looked like a normal girl—keep her mouth shut, no problem.
"Alright. I'll handle the rest on the fly. Everyone, hit the sack."
I clapped to end the meeting, and the staff headed upstairs.
Della fretted.
"I'm so tense... What if the queen wants a bath?"
"Hehe... Easy—you go in and scrub her back yourself, Della..."
Idi giggled, playfully squeezing Della's butt.
By dawn the next day, guards swarmed, sealing every road around the inn. Nearly a hundred heavily armed troops turned it into a wartime outpost overnight.
The local legion was probably on standby too.
Captain Lambert clanked in, armored head to toe with shield, sword, and crossbow.
"Balder. Preparations for Her Majesty going well?"
"Preparations? It's business as usual. Told yesterday—can't magic up more."
"Same here. Just following standard drills."
Lambert puffed up, adjusting his helmet's white feather plume.
"This is my shot to impress her. Straight to palace military aide."
"Rooting for you. If I get a chance, I'll put in a word: 'Rosens guard captain's top-notch—prime for promotion.'"
He grinned. Crude as his ambition sounded, I knew he was honest and steadfast.
"Balder. We haven't finished the Lurtjog thing... Let's after her inspection."
"Fine by me. No secrets from you, Captain."
That was about showing him the holy sword's power right after crashing with Lurtjog. Better tell the truth—Lambert wouldn't buy lies.
Hildeva and Celereja were in the yard early, tensely muttering lines. Prepping responses if the queen spoke to them.
Then a dimensional gate opened in the yard. A dozen people emerged, Brione in front. She startled at me, then smiled.
"Meeting again so soon, Bertrand."
"What's this sudden mess?"
"Why bother explaining? You know her temperament best."
"Yeah. Capricious, sinister, cunning, violent, etc."
Brione panicked, glancing at the palace officials behind her.
"Let's check what needs checking."
Advance team to scan the queen's path for threats. Mostly mages and priests hunting magic traps or curses.
They combed every path, even to the monster zoo, for hours. Predictably, nothing.
"Phew... All clear. I'll bring her."
Brione gated out. Moments later, Elua finally set foot in our inn's yard.