The Incubus Mage Who Conquered the Church
The Incubus Mage Who Conquered the Church
"You're challenging me to a duel?"
"Yes. He's got a fiery temper, so he tends to draw his sword first and ask questions later. Every churchgoer around here knows how foul his personality is."
So a paladin was nursing a one-sided crush on Kate.
Come to think of it, that wasn't strange at all.
A blonde nun with looks like a fairy would turn heads and claim queen bee status wherever she went.
It stood to reason someone in the same organization might develop feelings for her.
"So this Jake bastard is on his way here right now."
"That's right! You need to get out of here fast, mister. Even if you just stand there quietly without saying a word to her, the paladin is going to try to run you off. Don't think he's anything like the regular churchgoers who just grumble and let things slide."
I knew better than to lump him in with the regular congregation.
A paladin was the only member of the Luminous Church freely permitted to wield force.
If a being he personally judged to be evil appeared before him, he could cut it down on the spot.
'A paladin who matches me in skill, huh.'
Just to be sure, I asked Nancy.
"How exactly do you know this paladin is roughly my equal in skill? You've barely seen me use magic."
"Sister Kate said so, so it's gotta be true! You know her skill at measuring adventurers' specs is no joke."
"Then it's solid, I guess."
Not some headcanon bullshit — if it was straight from Kate herself, it was reliable.
Kate's specialty as an adventuring nun was precisely gauging a dealer's capabilities.
The moment that sank in, I couldn't help tensing up.
Paladins.
Living weapons the Luminous Church bred specifically to exterminate heathens.
I'd heard that paladins who wielded both holy incantations and martial arts were an absolute nightmare to deal with.
They could self-heal with curative spells, and on top of that, their martial prowess gave even dedicated martial artists a run for their money.
But what I feared most of all was their unbreakable willpower.
Paladins endured grueling training from their apprentice days and grew into warriors whose resolve could never be shattered.
Their minds were forged in extreme conditions specifically to resist heathen brainwashing techniques.
I'd only crossed paths with a paladin once in my entire adventuring career.
Heathens had infested the region where I was out hunting, and a paladin had appeared out of nowhere and butchered dozens of them all by himself.
Watching that scene from a distance, I'd been so terrified my legs nearly gave out.
I'd been more afraid of the paladin than of the heathens.
'I thought a goddamn Terminator had shown up. How the hell do you slaughter dozens of people like bugs, even if they're heathens?'
The reason hearing that Paladin Jake was coming made me tense up was because I'd seen a paladin in action with my own eyes.
Anyone would get jumpy hearing they'd drawn the ire of a killing machine like that.
"Quit standing around and go, mister!"
Nancy shoved at my back, trying to force me out of the church.
But it was already too late.
The cheers of churchgoers rang out from the main gate of the church branch.
"The paladin has returned!"
"Look at that! He's brought back heathen hands!"
I lifted my head and spotted the paladin's party crossing through the main gate and entering the church grounds.
A man clad in plate armor engraved with crosses strode confidently at the head of the group.
My instincts told me immediately — this was the paladin returning to the church after a sortie.
Paladins armored themselves head to toe in full plate, every last one of them, just like this guy.
"Mister, the paladin's back! Wh-what do we do?!"
"......."
"You've gotta get out of here! You know that kitchen I went into with the sister last time, right?! I'll guide you there — just hide!"
Nancy grunted as she seized my arm and tried to drag me toward the rear of the church building.
If I hid somewhere until the paladin passed by, I could probably survive this unscathed.
But I stood rooted to the spot, not budging an inch.
Because I couldn't run from this.
"M-Mister, what are you doing?!"
In the distance, I saw Kate.
Ten nuns trailing behind the paladin like handmaidens.
Among them was the blonde-haired nun who was my lover.
Paladin Jake kept turning back to speak to Kate, over and over.
At first the distance was too great for me to make out the words, but gradually his voice reached my ears.
"Lovely weather, isn't it, Kate?"
"......."
"Today is Lord Baldur's birthday. If you happen to be free, how about sharing a meal together this evening?"
"I'm not sure."
Kate looked plainly uninterested, but Jake kept pressing his case.
A stiff smile was plastered on Kate's lips — the same business smile she used when dealing with any adventurer besides me.
"Paladin. I've already told you, I have someone I'm seeing. I've said it over and over ever since you returned from your sortie."
"Then who exactly is this man you're seeing? I've been asking since earlier and you haven't given me a single answer. Don't just brush me off — if there's something I'm lacking as a man, tell me. I'll fix it."
I'd heard that the churchgoers still didn't know Kate was dating me.
Paladin Jake had a blood-soaked sack in one hand — inside were the severed hands of heathens.
Paladins always took hands as trophies to prove they'd hunted heathens, after all.
'Is this guy a fucking psychopath?'
He was hitting on a woman he liked while holding a sack reeking of gore in one hand.
Peak Luminous Church paladin — fanatic through and through.
Kate herself was eyeing that blood-drenched sack with undisguised revulsion.
"If today doesn't work, how about tomorrow evening?"
"Stop pestering me. Before I clock you with a Mage Hand."
"If getting smacked with a Mage Hand means sharing a meal with you, I'd have no complaints. So please."
It was while Jake kept relentlessly working Kate that I shook off Nancy's hand and walked forward.
The moment I strode toward the main gate, the murmuring of churchgoers buzzed around me.
"What's that incubus bastard doing?"
"He's heading straight for the paladin. Guess he thinks because we went easy on him, the paladin will too."
"Heh heh. That dream demon fucker's finished now."
I knew exactly how this would play out, but I didn't stop walking.
When I appeared directly in front of him, the paladin ceased his advances and glared at me with bulging eyes.
In that instant, Jake's voice and Kate's voice rang out at the same time.
"Incubus?"
"M-Mongma-nim?!"
The moment Jake spotted me, his hand flew to the sword hilt at his hip.
Kate looked back and forth between me and Jake with startled eyes, then immediately tried to stop Jake first.
"Stop! Strictly speaking, an incubus does not fall under the demonic forces the Church has publicly denounced. Cutting down an incubus is murder."
"I'm aware that incubi are not classified as enemies of the Church. But aren't all incubi wicked? I don't know what business brought him here, but he's bound to have sinister intentions."
Shhhing! Paladin Jake drew his longsword and leveled it at me.
"As a nun, I can vouch for him! This incubus is not a wicked person."
"And how exactly can you vouch for that, Kate? I'm quite curious to know what sort of relationship you have with this incubus."
At Jake's sharp question, Kate hesitated.
"Th-that's because Mongma-nim is...."
"Mongma-nim, is it?"
Kate couldn't continue.
As a nun, the fact that she was dating a dream demon wasn't something she could casually let the congregation know.
A relationship between a dream demon and a nun — by the churchgoers' common sense, such a thing was unthinkable.
"Mongma-nim... Quite an affectionate term of address."
Jake walked toward me where I stood facing him, his eyes frigid.
The longsword in his hand swayed menacingly.
"I think I understand without you having to say it, Kate. This irreverent incubus has ensnared your heart, hasn't he. So he's the man you said you were seeing — this dream demon."
"S-Stop! I said don't take another step toward Mongma-nim!"
"Please, sisters. Restrain Kate for a moment while I deal with this incubus."
The nuns who had been following Jake seized hold of Kate.
A paladin had the authority to command even the nuns, after all.
I faced off against Jake, who had closed the distance and now stood right in front of me.
And inwardly, I sighed.
'Just my fucking luck.'
The day I came to the church to seduce a nun happened to be a major holy day, and of all things, I had to run into a psychopathic paladin who loathed incubi.
No luck at all.
But then again, my life had always been miserable.
I'd just had a brief stretch of good fortune when I met Rebecca and Kate — my dream-demon existence had always been this shitty.
So honestly, it wasn't anything to get worked up about.
"What's your name? You there, the blonde dream demon."
"Luke."
"I'm Jake, paladin of the Yoen-su branch. From the looks of it, you've got Kate ensnared. I've heard you incubus bastards have a remarkable talent for beguiling women."
I'd expected him to skip the talk and just start swinging, but surprisingly, no.
Jake attempted to reason with me.
"I'll say this politely. Stay away from Kate. If you swear an oath to Lord Baldur, I'm willing to let you leave in peace. I'd rather not spill blood on such an auspicious day. Today is Lord Baldur's birthday."
"......."
"Refuse my offer, and I'll take your head. So choose. Give up on Kate, or lose your head."
Jake leveled his longsword at me.
I answered him evenly.
"I can't choose either."
"Hm?"
"I'm an incubus mage. I neither lose women, nor lose duels."
I finished my answer and intoned a spell.
"Liquid."
A long whip formed of liquid now rested in my hand, as if it had been there all along.
The moment he saw the writhing Water Whip, Jake didn't flinch — instead, a cold smile crossed his lips.
He was a paladin who hunted heathens.
He'd seen plenty of magic before.
"A dream demon who's learned magic. Impressive."
Jake poured strength into the hand gripping his longsword.
Fwoosh! In that instant, the blade of the longsword began to radiate a pure white light.
A sacred radiance that inspired a sense of rapture in anyone who beheld it spread in all directions.
A holy aura, almost like the aura martial artists wielded, sheathed the blade of the longsword.
But that was no aura — it was a technique unique to paladins.
'Holy Blade.'
A technique that maximized Divine Power and manifested it as a razor-sharp blade of energy.
Holy Blade inflicted fatal wounds on any enemy the paladin designated as 'evil.'
The key point being that 'evil' was entirely subjective to the paladin in question.
It wasn't bound by the doctrines of the Luminous Church — Holy Blade grew in power solely according to the paladin's own sense of justice.
And as for me, an incubus.
I was exactly the kind of target this paladin had judged to be wicked.
If that Holy Blade cut me, my body would be carved clean through, bones and all.
Boom! Boom! Boom!
The paladin gripped his Holy Blade and charged.
As his heavy, plate-armored frame barreled forward, the ground rumbled ominously.
"Mongma-nim!"
I heard Kate's voice calling from a distance.
I didn't answer her.
I simply watched the charging paladin and recited my spells.
The new spells I'd spent the past month mastering.