Chapter 60
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 5
Chapter Title: Reporting In
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"Hiya... My military life's finally gettin' all stretched out nice and fun! God Raphael of light and mercy, thank ya ever so kindly!"
The welcome greeting hits me right as I walk in, and man, is it dripping with enthusiasm.
She comes rushing right up to my bunk, her face puffed up with excitement as she asks me,
"Newbie, ya ain't got no girlfriend, right!?"
"Private Han Jeong-woo. Negative!"
Before I can even finish answering, she's grinning ear to ear, chuckling to herself. Looks like she's got big expectations for life from here on out.
The way she's drooling without even realizing it, I bet she's already naming our grandkids in her head.
We just met today, and she's already this worked up...?
"Who're the kinda girls ya like!? C'mon, spill it fer now!"
"Clara."
But that bubbly vibe freezes solid at the redhead corporal's remark.
"Don't mess with our Jeong-woo."
"Aw, c'mon, Corporal Rachel. Why ya gotta do me like this right off the bat?"
It's obvious there's bad blood here. The corporal and the lance corporal square off with me stuck right in the middle, tension crackling between them.
"Clara, you've grown up so much. Feels like old times, your personality showing through, huh?"
But in the end, it's the redheaded one who takes control of the conversation.
Rachel Corporal.
The army's a hierarchy at heart. If it goes all the way, the higher rank wins.
"You've only got a few months left, sis. Help out quietly around the barracks, yeah?"
"Aw, fine... I gotcha."
Even Clara Lance Corporal, with her thick dialect, has no choice but to grudgingly step aside.
Thanks to that, newbie management falls to Rachel Corporal. In the army, even talking to newbies follows seniority.
"Great! First off, let's have our little cutie do a quick intro, shall we~?"
She hooks her arm around my shoulder with a crystal-clear smile playing on her lips. Up close and personal like this, a super teasing scent lingers right at the tip of my nose.
"Jeong-woo, right?"
"Private Han Jeong-woo! Yes, ma'am!"
"Good, good~ What a spirited voice! I like it a ton!"
Rachel Corporal barrels ahead without a hint of hesitation, prying into every detail of my life. Makes sense—she's basically queen of this barracks.
"How old's our Jeong-woo?"
"Twenty-one, ma'am!"
"Aw, perfect age! How old ya think I am?"
Damn. Trickiest question ever.
"Twenty-two, ma'am...!?"
For stuff like this, just ballpark it. As long as it's not too high or too low, you're golden.
"Hmm. Why?"
The key's the follow-up line.
"Ya give off that reliable big-sis vibe I can trust and lean on!"
Tack on a smooth explanation like that, and most folks eat it up.
Grin!
Rachel Corporal beams from ear to ear and starts bragging to the other seniors.
"Hey, Clara, ya hear that?"
"Kyaa... Corporal Rachel's still got it in her~"
Even the lingering tension between the corporal and lance corporal melts away completely. As a newbie, the best I can do is read the room and keep the vets happy.
She hops right up and slaps a hand on my shoulder.
"This big sis is feelin' great! The new junior's already a favorite. Just a few months back, we got some deadweight, and I thought my military life was done for—but the payoff for toughing it out is finally here!"
Guess that "deadweight" means the other private first class, me and Mino's direct senior.
Out of our two privates first class, the short one with the rabbit ears looks especially clueless and quirky. Even now, she has no idea Rachel Corporal's shots are aimed at her and just keeps giggling away.
"Heehee. I got a junior too!"
She's thrilled to escape being the baby of the barracks. Those perky rabbit ears poking up are pretty striking.
"...Huh? Wait, who's she?"
But there's one thing nobody noticed. I'm not the only newbie checking into Barracks 1.
"Private Mino."
Only after the rabbit private first class spots Mino do the other seniors turn to look at her bunk. There sits a rock-solid newbie staring straight ahead in perfect posture, not a hair out of place.
"Holy shit, what's with her?"
"Sh-she looks like a newbie."
"Two newbies?"
Rachel Corporal and Clara Lance Corporal exchange glances, trying to wrap their heads around it. Seems like two transfers at once is pretty rare.
"Whoa... Clara, you've really grown up. Must've pushed about manpower shortages, huh? Even that strict company commander sent two at once."
"When I did it, they didn't budge a damn inch!"
Anyway, the whole Barracks 1 turns into a festival vibe.
More people means more bodies for work detail, which means less chance the seniors get tapped for duties.
And if they do get thrown in, they can just dump it on the juniors. That's why units with heavy physical labor especially roll out the welcome mat for newbies.
"Guess this means I gotta step up personally~"
Rachel Corporal flashes a sly, wicked grin totally different from before.
She struts over to the window in nothing but her underwear, hands behind her back, and calls us over.
"You two newbies, front and center—now!"
"Front and center...?"
Mino just tilts her head, not getting it, but I know exactly what Rachel Corporal's about to pull.
In crude terms...
Last-year hazing.
"We've already done intros with our cutie Jeong-woo, so... horned lil' sis! I'm givin' you the glorious chance to have this big sis hook you up with a boyfriend."
"...?"
Mino tilts her head again.
She's strong as hell and nails everything she tries, but from what I've seen, she's total noob when it comes to social stuff like this.
"Got a boyfriend?"
"Negative."
So she answers dead straight.
Doesn't even clock the issue, just blurts it out.
"...Too bad. But hey, plenty of chances left."
Rachel Corporal pats Mino's shoulder.
"Private Mino."
Every time, Mino has no choice but to give her name and rank. It's standard when seniors or officers call you out or touch you.
"Where's home?"
"Don't have one."
"Ah, no hometown? That's a new one. No worries! You've got tons of shots left. Any guys you know who'd match well with this big sis?"
Mino blinks a couple times, glances sideways at me, then...
"..."
After pondering, she faces Rachel Corporal again.
"Negative."
The mood's getting weird.
Familiar to me, sure, but Mino's got zero immunity to this kinda thing...
"Alright. Tough luck. Now our Mino...? You've only got one shot left."
Rachel Corporal grips Mino's shoulder tight and asks,
"Any handsome guys in your family or relatives!?"
"Negative."
Unfortunately...
Mino doesn't know any guys besides me.
Outcome's obvious.
"...Drop and give me push-ups."
Rachel Corporal clutches her head and barks the order.
Mino hits the deck without a clue why.
"How do ya not know even one guy? It's like ya don't wanna introduce anyone to a stranger like me!"
At least Mino's not showing any displeasure—she just obediently drops.
Doesn't even seem to grasp the problem, waiting all docile for the next command.
Honestly, lucky she hasn't punched Rachel Corporal in the face yet.
This girl's the type who could straight-up decapitate someone if things go south.
"While you're down there, retrace your whole life from the start. Execute!"
"Executing."
"Any guy'll do—remember one! From when you were suckling at the teat to your big ol' self now! You've gotta know at least a few dudes. Dig deep!"
She drops if told to drop, push-ups if told. Fair enough—Mino followed instructors fine back at basic too. Except for that flying knee to Hayes.
She's holding it together now, so why not then...?
Only two differences.
One, Hayes was our peer.
Two...
I'm not the one getting it.
Hold up.
Don't tell me...
Mino really sees me as a good friend?
Loyal as hell. Gets mad if it's about me.
That explains grabbing Liv Lance Corporal's wrist too. Stepped in 'cause she thought I was in trouble.
Otherwise, Mino never loses her cool. Stays so calm it's almost unsettling.
"Ugh, frustrating as hell! Clara, does it make sense she'd know zero guys? Might as well die. How do these kids lack even basic manners?!"
"Aw, Corporal Rachel, don't get steamed! I'll grab her tight and sort it."
Even while getting chewed out, Mino's chill as can be. Not a drop of sweat in push-up position—must not be taxing her at all.
Meanwhile, the two privates first class sneak peeks, enjoying the show. Prime entertainment for them.
"Private First Class Shika, don't let 'em get too chewed up. Aw, poor things."
"...You laughin'? Got time to laugh during newbie training?"
"S-sorry, ma'am..."
Of course, drama's brewing over there too. First day's total chaos.
"Alright, our milk-cow buddy knows no guys. Normally, a newbie's gotta cough up at least one decent intro."
I swallow hard, smack in the eye of this storm.
For lifetime loner Mino's sake, I gotta flip this vibe.
"Hmm..."
Rachel Corporal paces around me, slapping her slippers.
"How old was our baby again?"
"Private Han Jeong-woo! Twenty-one, ma'am!"
"Sis here's twenty-three. Two years older, huh?"
She flips her expression in a flash, drapes an arm over my shoulder, and grins.
"Perfect! Guess I'll play sweet with our Jeong-woo till discharge. Private Mino! At ease!"
"Private Mino."
She hauls Mino back up.
"You're super lucky. Real lucky kid. Why? 'Cause you snagged such a cute guy peer and brought him right to this big sis. Right?"
"...Affirmative."
But I catch the [disgust] on Mino's face as we stand there face-to-face.
Her eyes are locked on Rachel Corporal's hand on my shoulder. Hates this touchy-feely crap.
"..."
Makes me uneasy for no reason.
Feels like Mino might snap any second.
But before my worries turn real...
Knock knock knock.
A small, clear sound from the door.
A timid knock.
Creeeak.
"Um, hey, guys..."
Another new face shows up.
Your unit's always a madhouse. Everyone but me and Mino already knows each other, tangled up in all sorts of ways.
We've gotta blend in quick. Learn to mesh with the group.
"It's the platoon leader... Uh, um... Mind if I come in for a sec?"
But there's one more soul as out of place here as us. No confidence, no grit, not even smooth talk...
"What're y'all up to? Sorry I'm late as platoon leader...! Worked hard together today too, hehe..."
The platoon leader, sweating bullets.