Chapter 34
Chapter 34
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 34
Chapter Title: Ambiguous Emotions
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It's been four months since the physical change socially known as "manifestation" occurred.
Today was his regular day off. Even though it was a sweet rest he'd been craving for a while, Haon Park was rummaging through the internet in his tiny one-room apartment.
"...Is my personality changing or something?"
Without thinking, he clicked the mouse, and the thought suddenly crossed his mind.
Wandering aimlessly around the neighborhood looking for a new hideout, or hunting down famous eateries on Instagram. Back when he was a woman, even if there was nothing to do, he preferred heading out and having fun.
But now?
"That point" onward, the number of times he went outside had noticeably dropped, and these days, even on days off, he found himself locking himself in his room.
He figured it was all because he'd become a man—everything felt like such a hassle otherwise, and he rarely went out unless it was a special occasion.
"...What? This guy was a manifestee too?"
Haon skimmed through an internet article, crunching on the apple the landlady had peeled for him.
The nation of the cauldron, was it?
In Korea, quite some time had passed since the first occurrences, and mentions of that series of inexplicable events had rapidly dwindled.
"Whoa, she's gorgeous..."
Politicians who once made a fuss about it being a social issue and pushed for legal measures had gone quiet, and "manifestation" had become something that only popped up occasionally in news articles.
But the drop in social attention didn't leave him feeling neglected or anything. If anything, he welcomed it.
He didn't particularly want to talk about it, and his streams had stabilized anyway. In fact, after the incident, viewers had surged in droves, leading to what they called a massive "jackpot." No regrets there.
With concerns about perception easing and his career skyrocketing, it was the perfect situation.
"If there's anything bothering me..."
Suddenly, a twinge of regret hit him—had he dragged Noeul Lee into something unnecessary?
With her pretty looks that were obviously appealing at a glance, and that perpetually timid vibe.
He'd thought she perfectly matched the shady viewers' tastes, so using the incident as an excuse, he'd proposed a collab stream.
"I thought it'd be fine..."
She'd adapted surprisingly well in the first stream, and Noeul herself seemed to enjoy it, so he'd gone ahead with a second one, using the viewers as a pretext.
"And I thought it was fine..."
Noeul had handled the viewers' prying questions pretty deftly. But he'd been the one whose mental broke first!
That's why he'd thought she had a talent for streaming. He'd assumed she'd adapted well.
That was right up until he saw her depressed expression right after the stream ended.
"She wasn't adapting... she was just holding it in..."
Questions that would make any woman feel humiliated! Even now, the thought made his blood boil.
"I told them to be careful before the collab."
He'd begged them, saying she was a civilian and to think before typing in chat, but what came back was a thoroughly downcast Noeul.
He'd frantically shoved food into her mouth to cheer her up, and seeing her mood lift had been a relief. Otherwise, he might've lost a friend, and the thought made Haon dizzy.
"You bastards. You're perma-banned forever. No? I'll hire a lawyer."
That day, everyone who crossed the line got slapped with "permanent ban." He'd even happily run laps on the field by number if she agreed. He was fully ready to show them the might of the rule of law.
Lost in these and other thoughts, his face blank as he surfed the net for a good while. Then his smartphone suddenly vibrated, and Haon hurriedly checked the screen.
《When are you moving?》
Seeing it was from Daesik, his fellow streamer, the spark in Haon's eyes faded.
"...Just spam."
Haon set the phone face down again.
How much time had passed since he'd sent the KakaoTalk? Still no reply.
"...Probably still sleeping. Hasn't eaten breakfast yet, huh?"
With that thought, Haon went back to browsing.
He was searching his own nickname on communities, checking public opinion, when one post caught his eye.
Haon clicked the post as if entranced by its straightforward title.
The lengthy post, starting with those words, had a decent structure unlike the usual crap flooding communities.
Of course, given the source, he couldn't believe it all, but it was immersive enough for Haon, the subject himself.
The writer argued that even small doses of hormones did it, but manifestation turned you into a hormone bomb, so emotional changes were natural.
All part of nature's way.
"Hmm..."
Haon let out a groan as he read.
So, the morning tents and his gaze drifting to women without realizing it— all natural too?
The conclusion boiled down to:
It was clearly self-justifying, and reactions weren't exactly positive, but it gave Haon a big boost.
Relief that it wasn't weird for him to blankly stare at celebrity fancams he never cared about before.
A valid reason for feeling anew about a woman's body he'd seen for 24 years!
"The teacher's..."
Haon grinned happily, hitting like and recommend.
With his guilt eased a bit more,
[Sudden NSFW GIF Drop. 1]
[Sudden NSFW GIF Drop. 2]
[Sudden NSFW GIF Drop. 3]
...
he clicked the eye-catching posts as if hypnotized.
"Oh... gotta save before it gets deleted..."
His computer's storage, once seemingly endless, was now so depleted after four months as a man that he was considering an external drive.
"Does Noeul feel the same way?"
Haon smiled contentedly at his bulging folder, then had that sudden thought.
Had she explored curiosities like him after manifesting? A sacrilegious notion.
"...She doesn't seem the type."
A messy room. Piles of pizza boxes and trash bags. A haven for someone scraping by day to day. Yet mismatched with her scammingly beautiful looks and innocent expression.
Flowers bloom amid ruins, they say.
"Hmm..."
He had no firm assurance she hadn't, but no conviction she had either.
Imagining Noeul doing that with her pure face... wasn't impossible, but...
"...Damn."
This was all the "NSFW lurker's" fault. Seeing that stuff planted these thoughts.
Haon shook his head to dispel it. Imagination was free, but why the guilt?
Positive thoughts. Peace of mind.
Before stray ideas deepened, Haon shut down the computer and leaned back in his chair.
"Fate's a funny thing."
He tried redirecting his thoughts.
Their first meeting had been so bizarre.
The guy he'd kept cursing as a jerk turned out to be the landlady's tenant, and a fellow manifestee to boot.
Feeling bad for offending her, and bonded by shared experience, he'd taken good care of her.
And now...
"Do I like her?"
The sudden question left him pondering, but no answer came.
Not certain, yet not deniable—a vague emotion.
Was it pity-derived sympathy? Pure goodwill? Or affection? Honestly, no clue.
"...Can I even date? Me?"
Not just lack of experience, but a fundamental doubt: post-manifestation, could he date a woman?
"Haa..."
His sigh was deep.
Not hearing from the rice cake giver, Haon sipped his own kimchi soup and mulled deeply.
Then his phone buzzed suddenly, and Haon kicked back his chair, jumping up.
A smile crept across his face as he read the message.
《Just woke up lol》
《Did you sleep well, oppa?》
A title he'd never expected to hear in his life.
As unfamiliar as the title was the feeling that settled in his chest.
"This is normal too, right...?"
Hormones' doing. The ticklish chest was natural.
Haon typed with a subtle smile.
Night and day flipped; the sun was already dipping low. A bit early, but not awkward timing.
- Wanna grab dinner together?
"...Right, we agreed to drop formal speech."
Staring at the blinking text, Haon hesitated, then edited.
- Wanna grab dinner?
Good enough?
Pondering briefly, he recalled an old internet post.
The post's title was that type—tips dubious to Haon with his 24 years as a woman, but not entirely useless.
Don't give the other side room to hesitate.
The thought struck him; Haon retyped.
《Let's grab dinner》
《lol》
Worried it was too direct, he added meaningless "lol."
The reply came quick.
《Sure lol》
That ticklish feeling in his chest. Vague, uncertain emotion.
Haon hurriedly threw on clothes and left the room.
"Where you going? Dinner's ready!"
"Got plans!"
The landlady's shout from the kitchen rang out, but Haon ignored it.
The road ahead was long.