Chapter 80
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Translator: Ebonarch
Chapter: 80
Chapter Title: The Real Reason I'm Loved
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"Puhha."
The president downed the water from his cup in one gulp and fished a cigarette out of his pocket to light up.
Huh? Isn't this a no-smoking zone?
Of course it was no-smoking, and before he could even take a single drag, a hotel staffer warned him off and he stubbed it out.
What the hell was that?
"Such superstitious nonsense."
I couldn't hold back, even if I felt a little dumbfounded.
"The peacock legend is just one example. It's not that you're a descendant of that Zhou guy who plucked the feathers, but that you have 'that kind of trait.' There are similar stories overseas too, not just the peacock tale. Women who bring success to the men they bond with, men who make the women around them happy—stories like that exist worldwide. Of course, there are also ones who drag everyone around them to ruin."
The president kept flicking his cigarette pack open and shut, clearly itching for a smoke, as he pressed on.
"Still, I get it—these superstitious stories are tough to swallow. I wouldn't buy them myself. But when something happens that even 21st-century knowledge can't explain, you end up believing the superstition anyway."
With that, President Choi Dae-seung brought up yesterday's shoot with Mi-so and Jin-i.
"You know how everyone has a limit to the tones they can produce? In yesterday's 'Breeze' recording, Jin-i blew right past that limit. A limit no human being can cross."
"...You really think that was something I did, President?"
"No other way to see it. Because today, Jin-i couldn't hit those notes. The only difference between yesterday and today? Whether Jin Sun-hu was there or not."
Yesterday, Mi-so had said she'd blown over 300 times and that was her best take ever.
I hadn't thought much of it. Honestly, to tone-deaf hacks like us, they all sound about the same.
But for an expert to call it 'absolutely' impossible...
"That's why I'm convinced. You've got something special. Something that turned Jin Mi-so into the top idol, Jin So-young into the top golfer, Im Shin-hye into the top actress."
Absurd.
It's my older sister's talent. Mom's talent. Mi-so's talent.
The idea that I had anything to do with it? Laughable.
And yet.
Puzzle pieces were clicking together in my head.
"...Jin Sun-hu. Why not join our agency? We'll meet any terms you want."
It hit my ears like the devil's whisper.
Sweet as sin.
And then the president set a key down on the table.
Looked just like a hotel room key.
"Han Se-ah is waiting in this room."
Something icy slammed into my chest.
"You...!"
"Ah. Don't get the wrong idea. She agreed to this herself—"
Bang!
I shot up from my seat.
Stormed out of the lounge and hopped into the elevator heading down to the hotel basement.
My heart pounded like it was gonna explode.
A feeling I hadn't had in ages.
Pure rage.
"You fucking bastard!"
My fist stung from slamming the table.
I was the idiot for taking that bullshit seriously.
If the target hadn't been me.
If it had been Mi-so he wanted. If Mi-so had agreed.
Would Mi-so have been in that room?
Mi-so waiting for some random guy she didn't even know?
...Fuck!
"Excuse me."
The staffer already in the elevator said something.
"No. Sorry."
I shot back coldly.
No more words passed.
Down in the hotel's underground lot, I slid into the car and my phone went off.
Mi-so.
"Hu."
Seven rings. Eight.
It kept going.
I reined in my breathing and picked up.
『Oppa?』
"Mi-so, you said you wanted to quit being an idol."
『Huh? Why all of a sudden? The president just called...』
"Quit being an idol. No."
I had no clue what I was even saying.
No idea what I wanted to say.
Just... everything was unforgivable.
Mi-so working in this filthy industry.
That maybe I'd made it happen.
That Mi-so could've been in that room.
Han Se-ah. Park Soo-jin. Jin Mi-so.
These sweet girls tangled up in shit like this.
"...Sorry."
『Oppa? What the hell happened? Our president? What'd he say?』
"Later... We'll talk at home."
『Oppa! I'll quit right now! Before I do, I'll beat the president half to death! So don't cry, okay?』
I hung up.
Chest felt tight.
No clue what to say.
No clue who to unload this on or how.
"Ugh. Heuk."
I pressed my forehead to the steering wheel and sobbed.
Phone rang again.
Mom.
"Mo, Mom..."
『Sun-hu! Where are you? Where are you right now?』
"Mom. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry..."
I wrecked Mom's life.
Made her adopt some other woman's kid.
Made her raise some other woman's kid.
Made her divorce her husband.
Made her raise three kids on her own.
Made her spend every day cleaning up after some psycho kid from another family.
And then me.
Me. To that mom.
What did I do to her?
To Mom. To my sister. To Mi-so.
What the hell did I do?
All the things I'd done to Mom.
Made her do.
To my sister. To Mi-so.
Every single one flashing back.
Each one slicing my heart like a blade.
Ah.
I wanna die.
But I can't die.
Mom would grieve.
Right now, on the other end of the line, Mom's searching for me.
Worrying about me.
Scared I'll do something stupid.
Jin Sun-hu. Who the hell are you?
A devil seducing women.
A monster driving women insane.
"Mom. I just wanted to be loved."
The peacock's feelings.
Praying to the mountain spirit.
Desperate to be loved, even if it meant plucking those feathers.
I got it completely.
The world was too cruel.
People too cold to me.
Everything too hard, even just breathing.
Wanted to die.
But didn't know how.
So I kept on living.
Hoping someone would kill me.
Make the pain stop.
The one who saved me.
Mom.
Mom wasn't even my real mom.
Yet she loved me anyway.
Loved me like her own son.
Having that denied?
More painful than going back to that cruel world.
But what if it turned out to be
not love at all.
Some delusion.
The devil's temptation.
Someone pulling strings.
Forced to fake it.
I couldn't go on living.
"Hey! Jin Sun-hu!"
Bang!
Beep beep beep.
Alarm blaring like mad.
...Sis?
Why's sis here?
"Making a total fucking spectacle."
Bang!
Sis pounding the driver's window with a golf club.
"Hey! Door! Open up!"
Bang!
What? What's going on?
Why's sis got a golf club?
"Won't open in three? You're dead! One! Two!"
Click.
Can't let her smash it.
Ah, this car's one she bought me too.
"Punk, should've opened sooner. Driver's seat fucked. Know how much this costs? Car's tough as nails though."
Sis grabbed my tie and yanked me out.
"Si, sis, why."
"Why? Saw you roll up to the hotel in a Lamborghini, figured I'd check what bitch. Gonna kill her, you, and me too. Jealous much?"
Don't joke like that.
Coming from sis, it doesn't sound like a joke.
"Yeah. Got Sun-hu. Ah, don't worry—I'll sweet-talk him. Won't hit him. Why would I? You think I'm some gangster? Whatever, call Mi-so. She was about to chase after you too. Mom—don't stress her out, let her work. Who feeds Sun-hu if Mom quits? No one else puts up with raising an otaku idiot like you."
Otaku idiot...
Yeah. I'm a total otaku loser.
Mom loving a mess like me? Gotta be the curse.
Tears welled up again.
"Loser. Total fucking embarrassment."
Heading up in the hotel elevator with sis.
Happened not long ago too.
Was happy back then.
Sis loved me too.
Felt like I owned the world.
All of it a lie.
Mom, sis, Mi-so.
"So, why you bawling like a baby?"
Up in the hotel room.
Sis asked.
I spilled everything to her.
"Sis... The peacock, the peacock legend..."
"Pfft."
Sis burst out laughing.
At my story. Mocking the peacock legend.
"Puhahaha! Ahahaha!"
Way too much.
I'm dead serious here.
"Hey. Otaku. Listen up. Won't repeat myself."
Sis yanked my ear and laid it out.
"Women treating you nice? 'Cause you're hot as hell."
"......"
"Why they lose their minds to fuck you? 'Cause. Your. Face. Is. Gorgeous. Body. Ripped. Dick. Fucking. Massive! Idiot!"
Ow, my ear.
"Not some peacock delusion bullshit! Your cock! That's what drives 'em wild!"
Got it, sis.
Got it, so quit yelling in my ear.
And... let go of my dick...
"Mom! Sees you! As her! Real son! You blind or what, moron!"
"Ugh."
Sis's words.
Soaked into me like rain on parched desert.
"Peacock curse my ass. What, every chick loves you? Hated your guts first time I saw you. And I was a golf prodigy before we met. Your bio mom love you that much? Abused the shit outta you? Grown-ass man—start thinking before you live, dumbass. Only you'd fall for a voice phishing scam."
Sis admitting she hated me? Felt like a gift.
My bio mom's abuse story helping me? Who knew.
"Here. Grope your favorite tits or whatever. Ugh, you otaku punk. Quit with the fantasy crap."
"...You love me too, sis?"
"Ha. This whiny little bitch."
To my pathetic question, sis bellowed right in my ear.
"Fucking love you! Moron!"