Maid Haruru
"Yeah. Watching you makes me nervous. Give it here."
My boss came over and took the knife from my hand. Every time, I think the same thing: when the boss and I end up in a shot together, we really do look like mother and daughter.
Embarrassed that I’d had to summon Chae Money because I couldn’t even cut a daikon, I blurted out the first thing that came to mind to cover for myself.
"B-but it’s cute, right?"
"...Yeah, it is cute."
"Anyway, since the fox form lasts a long time, please help me out while I cook."
"I think I have to. Looks like you’d cause trouble."
"It’s not that bad, probably? Just help me a little."
Shhk!
At that moment, I heard the clean, crisp sound of a radish being sliced.
"Even when I put all my strength into it, I couldn’t cut that stubborn radish! And now she slices it that easily!"
Shhk! Shhk!
She chopped the radish into chunks, and now she was slicing it into fine strips with quick, practiced motions. She was usually so quiet and expressionless, but seeing her slice right through a radish like that was a little scary today.
"Boss, you’re not mad, are you?"
"So that’s why you fed us so well all this time..."
"She’s collecting repayment on the money she loaned you like this..."
"Graduation (for real)"
"What are you talking about?"
The sound of chopping stopped. Before I knew it, the stubborn radish had been sliced into perfect strips, ready to become stir-fried radish salad.
"Done. Sorry. The radish was tougher than usual, so I got more focused than I meant to. What were you saying?"
"They said it’s my turn next."
"Hahaha!"
Boss burst out laughing at the joke, like it hit exactly her taste. But she was laughing because it was a joke, right?
"You’re scarier when you laugh while holding a kitchen knife!"
"Next is... Haruru."
"Yes?"
"No, go bring me the sugar and a few other things. I’ll keep slicing the green onions."
"You scared me. I’m going and coming right back."
I brought back a clear basin about fifty centimeters across, then added the radish we’d just cut, the green onions, and sugar, salt, and the like.
"Would you call it a recipe? Did Chae Money make that?"
"At first I watched NewTube, but once I got the feel for it, I could make it on my own too."
"Nice."
Ignoring the anti-Haruru donation for a moment, we both put our hands into the basin and mixed everything thoroughly.
"Like this?"
"Yeah. Make sure it all gets evenly seasoned."
Mixing was done. Now all that was left was to pour oil into the frying pan and stir-fry it.
"Before I make the jeyuk bokkeum, I’ll show you a little sample of my stir-frying skills."
Sizzle!
A savory aroma spread out. Now I picked up the wooden spatula and...
Was this how you were supposed to stir-fry? My body and hands had gotten smaller, so instead of stir-frying, it felt more like I was just waving the spatula around.
"Am I doing okay?"
The chat looked strangely artificial.
"This feels like shameless boosting... you can be honest with me."
"Please boost me..."
But before long, both of my arms were already aching.
"C-Chae Money summoning technique."
"Tired?"
"...I’m a gaming-type muscle build, so I guess I was using muscles I don’t normally use."
"Are your legs okay? Do you want to sit down and rest?"
"It’s not that bad. This is my stream, so if I sit down and rest while Chae Money cooks, that’d be pretty shameless, wouldn’t it?"
"Fine, then."
Chae Money took the wooden spatula and stir-fried with effortless skill. The radish, which had looked like it would never finish no matter how long you kept frying it, had already turned into a delicious stir-fried radish side dish.
"Done. Now let’s move on to the main."
"Wow..."
With Chae Money beside me, the prep for the jeyuk bokkeum was finished in one smooth rush. We’d reached the point where all that was left was the final stir-fry.
"If I take that away, I’m basically a corpse, so no."
"Chae Money, let me at least try to stir-fry the jeyuk bokkeum. I need to add some wok hei."
"Hmm. Sounds dangerous."
"Oh, come on. There’s no way I’d die."
"Why are you trying to send me off."
"I already watched fire shows on NewTube, so I’ll be fine. Life isn’t about saying you can’t do something and stopping there; you have to try things to get better at them."
So, while I stirred the jeyuk and the time came, I put a little oil in, tilted the frying pan, and decided to feed it a flame.
Whoosh!!!
In that instant, flames surged up as if they were a bursting fountain, then vanished.
"Kyaaa!"
It felt like it shot all the way to the ceiling. I got so flustered that I turned off the flame and ran far away.
"What the hell, what the hell, what the hell. Wait. Whoa. Hold on. Whoa..."
"Are you okay?!"
"Ru-chan!!"
I wasn’t the only one startled; everyone hurried over to check on me.
"M-my heart won’t stop pounding. If I hadn’t moved, I would’ve turned from a black fox into a fire fox."
"I almost graduated from life and from Shaper at the same time. That insane fire show... but on NewTube, everybody always does it just fine."
"Ah."
"Well, anyway, nothing happened, so it’s fine. Let’s keep throwing out jokes like usual and have fun."
"Before that, we should apologize to the people who got startled."
"The boss is right! Ru-chan was really in danger just now."
"Sorry for worrying you all."
"I, uh, was so startled I almost grabbed the fire extinguisher. Be more careful from now on."
"Maybe it happened because Sally was here?"
"Me? Why?"
"Maybe the flame got rowdy because there was a fire spirit standing right next to it."
"Seriously. Your mental fortitude is the strongest thing in Shaper."
"Heh. I guess so."
Still, whether because I’d nearly traded my life for it or not, the fire flavor had soaked in nicely, and the jeyuk bokkeum that came out in the end was pretty satisfying.
"All right! Haruru’s winning-fire-flavor jeyuk bokkeum. I made it mild enough that even I can eat it, so Tama, you should have no problem."
"I’ll eat well. Haruru jeyuk-bbokkeum."
"Bbokkeum?"
"Mm-hm. Bbokkeum."
"It’s bokkeum."
"Bbokkeum."
"Well, that happens. Anyway, hurry up and try it."
"Before that, I have a question for my junior."
"What is it?"
Was the uneasy feeling I had just my imagination?
"Won’t you do the moe moe kyun to make it tastier? You went to the trouble of putting on the maid outfit."
Damn it.
After hearing that, Tama’s face lit up too, and she chimed in.
"That’s right! That’s right. There was something like that. How do you know about that, Sally senpai?"
"It’s pretty famous, you know."
Boss glanced at the chat for a moment, then relayed this message.
"She says if you do a moe moe kyun, she’ll forgive you for taking such easy advantage of the Chae Money summoning technique."
"Ru-chan! If you’re going to do it, let’s make it moe moe Ru-chan."
"What?!"
"Why do you all want so much!"
There didn’t seem to be any escape route. From the moment I put on the maid outfit, I’d expected I might have to do this too, but...
"Hoo. Fine. In honor of reaching 20,000 subscribers, I’ll do it just this once."
Just imagining it made my face burn. Damn it. Let’s hurry up and do this and get it over with. I made a heart with both hands and shouted,
"M-make it tastier. Moe moe Ru-chan!"
No, are the viewers enjoying this too much? From the way the chat was climbing, it felt about the same as when I succeeded at enhancement.
"Nyaaah! What did I just say out loud, being a real man and all."
I shouted, and then immediately had a wave of existential collapse. Extra points for that.
"You worked hard today. Eat up."
"Well, the boss did all the hard work..."
"I’ll eat well, Ru-chan!"
Everyone seemed to like it, because they were silently eating the jeyuk bokkeum and stir-fried radish. So this is why people cook? I felt a strange little swell of pride.
"Tastes good?"
"Mm-hm. This place’s boss is delicious, and the jeyuk is cute."
What?
"What? lol"
"Ahaha. You said it backward."
"Oh. Hehe. Ru-chan’s magic made it even tastier. Please do it again next time."
"Watch your mouth."
Watch it.
Another week passed after that. Honestly, ever since I started life as a VTuber, each day feels like it flies by.
Today is the day we’re running the twelve-person Lunatic Rabbit raid with the guild members. Early in the morning, before even getting up to eat, I turn on Unknown Universe on my phone. I wonder if my auto-farming is going well.
Then I notice a new event banner. They do these sometimes, with surprise events on the weekend and all that. Probably another scam so they can sell stuff at a discount. Greedy maniacs.
[Sudden Event]
In raid auctions, the chance of SSS-grade armor and accessories appearing has increased threefold.
What?
They’re actually doing an event where the player benefits?
"Ahh..."
If you’re going to hand out rewards like this, what’s left for you? Sorry for doubting you, GOATs who run the greatest game in the universe.