New Guild Recruitment Battle
For now, stay calm. He didn’t seem like a bad person. I greeted him and asked for a brief introduction.
He sounded like a man in his forties or fifties, at the very least.
That would’ve been rude to say out loud, so I kept my mouth shut, but he didn’t seem like he’d come here because he was a fan of VTubers in the first place. So how had he found us? Had he come because of the rumors about Unknown Universe?
My mouth went dry in an instant. And whenever I got nervous like this, I always ended up trying to break the tension with some reckless, forced joke.
Fortunately, he took it well, and the rigid mood loosened a little.
“First, I’d like to thank our Paruru here. I...”
“Sorry to interrupt, but it’s Haruru, not Paruru...”
“Ah. My apologies.”
But what exactly was he thanking me for? What had I done that deserved thanks? Had I done anything good lately? I asked in a puzzled voice, and he answered me kindly once again.
Now that he mentioned it, I remembered.
Tsugamushi, that cash-trade scammer who’d changed his nickname and come to interview with our guild, only to get caught by me and rage-quit. Back then, I’d told any victims to contact Shining Parade’s legal team.
I’d been debating whether to mention it on stream anyway, and I was going to wait until the result came out before saying anything. But since the topic had come up, I decided to tell the viewers how things were going and let them enjoy the satisfaction.
“The legal team helped the victims out properly, so we filed a very satisfying lawsuit. The evidence is solid, so punishment is just a matter of time.”
“That’s right. The victim who contacted us alone was, what, more than ten people? So you were one of them, ClearSkyBlue.”
“Yes. Thanks to you, I feel much better. I got scammed while trading in a game at fifty-two years old, so if I’m being honest, there’s no comfort in the world that’ll help—just being spared a beating from my wife would be a blessing.”
“What’s wrong with playing games, no matter your age? And the one at fault is the scammer, not you, ClearSkyBlue. Don’t put yourself down like that. Be more proud that you play Unknown Universe.”
“That may be true, but anyway, I heard the story. You’re looking for someone to pilot the spaceship, right?”
That may be so, but asking an airline captain to fly a game spaceship was like using a butcher’s knife to kill a chicken.
“Please give me a chance to repay my debt to you. As luck would have it, I’ve become strong enough to handle Hard Black Fox, so I’m sure I can be put to good use.”
But if he put it like that, then the story changed. Should I go for an all-time legendary party and try to take down Black Fox? Losing out on a remarkable person like this would be a waste. His character was top-tier too, so there was no need to ask Mone anything else.
“ClearSkyBlue, come with us!”
“I’ll be in your care. Though, what exactly is a VTuber? I know what NewTube is.”
As the guild grew larger, there were people who wanted to join even though they didn’t know much about me. That was very much like Unknown Universe, where generations overlapped so naturally.
Who would’ve thought I’d end up in the same guild as a man in his fifties who didn’t even know what a VTuber was? But when I actually tried to explain it, the words stuck in my throat.
“Well, it’s kind of... um...”
“Maybe think of it as something like a radio host? Only the theme is Unknown Universe...”
“Ah. I get the general idea. I’ll look into this VTuber thing more carefully later.”
Was it really okay to open a fifty-something man’s eyes to the world of VTubers? Ah, whatever. Hobbies don’t have age limits! This was as good a chance as any to introduce him to a new culture.
“Yes. I’m sure you’ll enjoy it. Later, please be sure to watch BlackFoxHaruru on NewTube now and then, and don’t forget to hit like and subscribe!”
“I will. And thank you again for catching that scammer. Let’s get along.”
“I should be the one thanking you.”
While waiting for the next applicant, I chatted with Mone again.
“This is fascinating. Recruiting an airline captain this time... This game really does attract all kinds of unusual people, for better or worse.”
“But I still haven’t met anyone as unusual as you, Haruru.”
“You mean unusual in a good way, right?”
“Of course~.”
“Quiet.”
As I kept recruiting guild members, yet another odd person came in.
“Oh.”
“Then, without further ado, I’ll sing a song.”
“What? Right now? This isn’t a place for singing, this is a guild interview...”
He ignored my words and started singing. It had come out of nowhere, but I was surprised by how nothing was missing—not the technique, not the tone, nothing at all.
“Why, why? Why are you singing so well when you’re just making everyone flustered like this...”
Judging by the name I got from Insight, he didn’t seem to be a singer. Of course, he might be one I just didn’t know, but his traits didn’t point that way.
“I’m not a singer. I did once dream of becoming one, but after realizing my talent, I now work as a vocal trainer.”
“I won’t tell you the academy because that’d be advertising! So, how was my singing?”
“The singing itself is truly flawless...”
Everybody had forgotten one thing: we were in the middle of guild recruitment. This guy’s power level was like a character who’d just barely finished the tutorial. He looked like someone who’d been created in a hurry about ten minutes ago.
“Do you play Unknown Universe?”
“Nope! But the singing was amazing, right?”
“Then do you have any intention of starting Unknown Universe?”
“Nope!”
“Then why did you come here?!”
“What the hell?! You came just because you wanted to sing? Well, I did enjoy the song.”
“What on earth is this guy...”
“You think I was asking because I couldn’t hear that?!”
Honestly. The more viewers we got, the more strange people seemed to appear. Of course, this was a level I could still turn into a joke and laugh off, but if I let even a little of this slide, the whole streaming world would turn it into a trilogy, then a fourth and fifth installment, and eventually an absolute overkill sequel, so I was starting to worry...
“We’re recruiting guild members. What are you talking about?”
“This isn’t the place for that.”
No, really, this wasn’t going to do. On one hand, I felt proud because it also seemed like proof of how much I’d grown, but I needed to change how I recruited guild members now. I really had to stop doing this like I was street-casting talent on the sidewalk.
“You saw the guild recruitment notice on the Shining Parade cafe board, right? Please leave a comment there with your job, combat power, and anything else you want to say. From now on, I’ll only interview people who comment! Thanks for understanding!”
“You don’t have to, but... if you really, really want to show off! If you’re the kind of person who’s desperate to catch my eye, then go ahead and show us.”
“Then shall we call today’s surprise guild recruitment a wrap? Mone, you’ve had a long day with the guild conquest too.”
“You’re ending the stream?”
“I’m going to eat lunch. Don’t Haeeeng!”
“Okay, then I should eat lunch too.”
“To our Mone, and to the guild members who joined today but not the ones who just came in—everyone who fought in the conquest battle with us! Whisper me and I’ll send you a RuChicken gift code.”
“Do I even have money for chicken?”
“For me, the Chaemoney Chans are like a passive skill. They’re always triggering. I’m spending Chaemoney’s money!”
“I’ll definitely pay it back someday, so can’t we call it my money too? I’ll work hard on stream and repay it. Please don’t insult me too much...”
“Ah, n-no.”
With that, I ended the stream and brought out Chaemoney’s lovingly prepared lunchbox. Today’s menu was also something Chaemoney herself had personally made...!
“Victory stir-fried pork.”
Before I mixed it into rice and devoured it, I picked up a piece of meat and tasted it like a little preview. This body of mine is a total spice wimp among spice wimps, so I’d been worried it’d be too hot, but it was just right—mildly spicy, with a level I could absolutely handle.
“Chaemoney... you knew I can’t handle spicy food, so you even adjusted the heat for me. Ahh.”
“I’m not crying! Geez. Why would I cry over that? I’m going to be teased about this forever, seriously.”
Then a distinctive icon appeared in the chat, and President Chae showed up.
“It’s so delicious... I think I might cry. And the spice level is perfect.”
Haeeeng vanishes the instant I see it, and even my teary eyes dry right up.
“No Haeeeng, just Haruru praise!”
If only I had beer with this, it’d be to die for. Come to think of it, I’d never once drank alcohol in this body. The reason was simple: naturally, my tolerance would be weak too. Still, I couldn’t possibly live my whole life without drinking, so what was I supposed to do about that?
Since I’m streaming alone right now, I won’t drink. Maybe later, when we plan a proper collab stream? Yeah, that sounds better. For today, I’ll substitute with soda.
“A bowl of Chaemoney’s lovingly made stir-fried pork over rice is the best!”
“A-ah, no. That’s my dark history! Please forget it as fast as possible.”
Hiss!
In a hurry to change the subject, I dramatically popped open a can of soda and poured it into a cup. The refreshing sound came through clearly even if the drink itself didn’t show on screen.
“All right, everyone. Today is a festival. Water, soda, anything works. Raise your glasses! The Shining Parade guild has won its very first new guild conquest battle, and not just won it—we made it a perfect game. This is a historic day.”
I summoned my fox ears and fox tail, turned on the camera, and gave a little wink.
“Cheers.”
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