Ways to Enjoy Vacation (4): The Breadcademy Game in Sky-High Esdinas
In the Breadcademy game, Esdinas of the Firmament, most players spend their break deepening relationships with the heroines. Those stuck at the academy throw themselves into tackling trials, while the ones who venture out enjoy events in the mountains, fields, seas, and rivers, laughing and chatting away with their heroines.
But there's a group that pours cold water on those sweet, fluffy heroine moments: the Binyu Group.
Beings brimming with malice as deep as the abyss. You could call it base jealousy, but some dub it the "flat-chest proletariat's revolution" against the "busty bourgeoisie."
You might argue there's no real critique of capitalism when the company rakes in cash selling color-coded bikini skins for female characters. But when the game snags cult status and claims the global #1 spot—GOTY to boot—suddenly the devs' philosophy comes into focus. Whether it's genuinely philosophical or just a setup to roast flat-chested characters, from my position dropped into this world, it's utterly ridiculous. I could jump out of my skin.
"Getting terrorized just for having big tits."
"Tell me about it."
Rydmila glanced out the opposite window from the two golden-haired Breadcademy undergrads on alert, responding to my self-deprecating remark.
"It's absurd, sure, but what those Binyu Group bitches plan to do if they catch us is downright horrific. Part of me wants to charge out, capture them all, and hand them over to the military right now."
"Won't be easy. Not many kingdoms or nobles want Binyu Group scum cluttering up their prisons."
Evangeline countered with a pale face.
"Better to just beat 'em down and knock 'em out on the spot. If you kill 'em, their pals come swarming for revenge, but leave 'em unconscious and abandoned? That's usually the end of it."
Telling them to call the cops of this era? Yeah, that doesn't fly.
"Even the Di Ershi Empire's prisons have been wrecked multiple times by those Binyu terrorists. They blow the place up with explosion magic, screaming about rescuing their comrades, murdering guards in the process...!"
The Binyu Group are hardcore terrorists. On the surface, they look like some gag-game side characters from a beach event—flat-chested gals popping up with an "Aaaang?" before getting smacked down. But in reality, they're a continent-wide headache of a terror organization.
I've experienced their attacks firsthand. The day Unia and I headed to the academy, they hijacked the magic train bound for the entrance ceremony, blocking tons of hopefuls from attending.
"They at least had some 'limits' until last year, but I heard this year's gotten extreme—and I didn't expect this extreme...!"
"It's the Mana Drain, Your Highness."
Yurha replied while channeling mana into her wand and firing off magic missiles.
"The Binyu Group had a field day forcibly draining mana from guys via Mana Drain for fun."
"I know that, but...!"
"And about two weeks ago, the ones who'd successfully boosted their cup size from AAA to AA via Mana Drain started dropping off one by one. ...Thanks to a certain someone's miracle."
"So that's why they're targeting us—especially me—so viciously?"
"Gotta be. If not for your Magic Pants, junior Phoenix, they could've robbed guys of mana and escaped their flat fate!"
Absurd, but that's the reality of this world.
The miracle of Magic Pants. Backed by Silverstar's funds, Yurha built a factory in the Ludbekia Marquisate, flooding the market with affordable Magic Pants. Now, tons of people are enjoying the miracle.
"They can't prey on men anymore, so they go after the guy who invented the crime-prevention device...!"
Unia fumed, but that's how the world works.
No miracle satisfies everyone.
Not everyone cheers for the miracle. 99% of men rejoice at protecting their mana and chastity. 90% of women are thrilled their fathers, brothers, and sons can now guard their purity.
The remaining 10%—or hopefully just 1%—of women must despise Mana Pants. It was their golden ticket to effortlessly boosting mana by snaring men, and now it's gone.
Sure, some probably tried luring guys to secluded spots or kidnapping them to basements, stripping off the Magic Pants by force for a Mana Drain.
"Should've added an alarm spell that triggers on forced undressing attempts?"
"Even without anti-burglary spells, those bitches would've tried to kill you anyway, Phoenix."
Such attempts are now nearly impossible. Magic Pants react to "mana" and read the wearer's mana signature. Try forcing them off against the wearer's will? A blaring alarm goes off immediately.
They even added a feature broadcasting a desperate cry like—
"Help! Someone's trying to force himself on me!"
—to alert everyone to an ongoing forced Mana Drain.
And thus...
"Not even Phoenix—they're calling me Golden Sun."
Right now, the Binyu Group spotted Yurha's golden carriage with its phoenix emblem—and me inside—and came charging on bikes to attack.
Neigh!!
The carriage horses picked up speed.
The Binyu Group riders aimed their Magic Rifles at the horses while biking alongside, but their mana stone bullets never reached.
Slash, slash!
Instructor Esta, perched on the carriage roof, swung her sword to intercept the incoming rounds.
Her face was probably a mask of irritation from lack of sleep, but even that menacing vibe didn't deter the Binyu Group.
"Hey."
Instructor Esta stomped on the roof—floor to us below.
"Looks like they're more serious than I thought."
"Ahahahaha!!"
A familiar laugh. Routine for players, but to Unia—who'd met her once—it sparked a "Huh?"
"One of Binyu Group's Seven Executives."
"I'll definitely kill you, Phoenix!!"
The black-helmeted woman riding level with the carriage, screaming for my death, had a black rose tattoo from shoulder to abdomen.
"That's...!"
Helmet makes it iffy, but probably an old acquaintance. Remember, Miss Unia?
I pointed at the Binyu executive aiming her Magic Rifle our way.
"The black-haired, red-eyed woman who hijacked our train to the academy."
"...Slend?"
"Slendia."
Bang!
Binyu executive Slendia fired a mana bullet at the carriage. The mana packed into the sharpened mana stone round was stronger than expected; it weaved through Unia's magic missile barrage like a missile and slammed into the carriage.
Clang!
The bullet hit the carriage window. The glass held, but seeing the scratch, someone ground their teeth.
"Ah, shit... "
Yurha openly showed her displeasure. Like getting a rock through your car window—no amount of money makes that not piss you off.
"Ugh, I wanna stop and beat 'em all down...!"
Same here. I'd love to halt the carriage, charge out, and knock out every last Binyu attacker. But there's more trouble behind them.
"Slow down, and the knight order tailing those Binyu bitches will nab us."
"Ha...!"
Yurha turned to me.
"That's why I said we should've limited Magic Pants to VIPs only!"
"Even then, the empire's emperor would've come hunting for them, right?"
"At least the knights wouldn't be chasing so zealously!"
Behind the Binyu Group: a knight order in golden armor, charging on horseback.
"Tch, buzz off! Flat bitches who won't even give us trouble!"
"Wh-what did you just say?!"
Mostly men, they fearlessly took down Binyu Group riders clinging to their flanks—shoving sword sheaths into solar plexuses and such.
"Guardian of Men!"
"Please, stop and hear our plea!!"
"Good thing it's not our empire."
Evangeline grimaced at the golden-armored knights.
"Your zealous fans are tailing us—wanna give 'em some fan service? As the Preacher of Miracles who saved their lower halves."
"Pass."
Separate from how roughly they handled the Binyu Group—not my style—these guys aren't folks I wanna get chummy with either.
"Even if they were all blonde beauties, I'd hesitate. A whole knight order of musclebound dudes? No thanks."
"But the empire's emperor's direct Golden Knights really wanna meet you, Phoenix."
"Let 'em meet the Binyu Group instead."
"Yeah, fair."
Getting mobbed by sweaty 20-40-year-old muscleheads. VS. Cursed and glared at by bandage-wrapped, utterly flat-chested gals.
Right now, we're fleeing both options.
"Better to... "
Not just fleeing blindly.
"...throw myself into Ma Mang's embrace."
Heading south, toward her domain.
"We're here."
A massive magic circle unfurled across the blue sky.
"Finally."
"...Ludbekia Marquisate."
The moment we passed through the black "curtain."
Br-r-r-rat!!
Black gem-like mana bullets rained down from the sky like a storm.