How the Obsessive Saintess Loves
How the Obsessive Saintess Loves
It was chilly. Maybe because I'd left the window open.
No dagger came flying to pierce my heart.
Instead, the Saintess's gaze, far worse than any dagger, came flying at me.
Unfortunately, my hands were slower than my eyes.
There was no way the body of a frail, sickly beauty possessed the dexterity to pull off a hustler's trick. And even if it did, I was too afraid of the hell that awaited if I slipped a bottom card from the deck while handing it to the Saintess to actually do it.
"There. It's Rosaria's turn."
The Saintess adjusted the cards to my eye level.
Because this was a card game where neither of us could afford to lose.
I was playing a very careful game of Go Fish.
But the card I drew then, of course, was the grinning Joker.
'I hate this... I... don't want to lose!'
Thinking that to myself, I went back to the moment that had led us here.
*
The deal the Saintess proposed the moment she arrived was a date.
Naturally, I thought it was absurd.
There was no way people wouldn't recognize the face of the Saintess, the world's greatest superstar. How could a Saintess like that just wander around carelessly?
...Or so there was a time in my life when I thought that.
"If you read the Sacred Scripture, you will find that the Saint disguised himself in many forms to test the faith of believers."
So said the Saintess, and with that she transformed her appearance.
From an old man to a young child, male and female. Even a small statue.
Living and inanimate, boundaries of gender and age, and so on.
It was a divine power that allowed her to take any form.
To the point I almost wondered why she hadn't just reincarnated me as the Saintess herself.
The Lord God's divine power was seriously the best.
No wonder everyone becomes a believer.
She was performing miracles right in front of my eyes,
and even I, something of an atheist, felt faith beginning to bloom.
So the guarantee that her appearance wouldn't be discovered was proven.
Then what was the reason we had to go on that date?
"...I just... want to do it. We promised to marry each other someday... so... surely we can do at least that, can't we?"
A fairly normal reason, if you took out the marriage part.
But the Saintess's thinking was actually rooted in this world's culture.
After that promise, just in case, I read some books and looked into the meaning of the promise, and thanks to that, I learned something I didn't want to know.
That what the Saintess had said was not a lie but the truth, and that, thanks to my ignorance, I had cheerfully given a blood letter on what amounted to a slave contract.
-The Saint locked fingers with his disciples and swore an oath; therefore, should you wish to break that promise, sever the finger you offered. And live your whole life in repentance. Otherwise, you shall fall into hell.
No joke, that was what was written in the Sacred Scripture.
So to nullify that promise, I would have to cut off my finger, live my whole life repenting to the Saintess, and if I didn't, I might actually go to hell.
Of course, joke promises between kids were fine.
The Scripture also said it didn't matter if it wasn't a promise between believers, that merely imitating the Saint's promise wouldn't incur God's judgment...
But the problem was, I had made that promise with the mentally fragile Saintess.
It wasn't the kind of promise you make in jest with a six-year-old child. It was a promise made with the proxy of this world's God.
However, that didn't mean there was absolutely no way out.
If the one who accepted the promise released it, I would be forgiven.
But as if that Saintess would ever release that promise.
If I spouted something like, "I don't think I can marry you. Let's break up," it was clear that either the Saintess or I, or both of us together, would be bidding this world farewell.
Truly, one must be careful with promises.
"In... in that case, may I also ask a wager of Your Holiness?"
But a wager, by nature, must involve a mutual exchange. Isn't it an unwritten universal rule that if you want 1, you have to be prepared to put up 1? The law of equivalent exchange?
"Ahh... of course, Rosaria. Whatever you desire, even if you ask something beyond the scope of my abilities, you may. For I will accomplish it no matter what. I will stake the name of the Saintess— no, the honor of the Holy Kingdom, and keep it for you. So please, just say the word."
Equivalent exchange can go to the dogs. A love as vast as the sea where, even if all I gave was 1, she would give 100. Be that as it may, was it really okay to throw around the honor of the Holy Kingdom like that? Did she reach a consensus with the Holy Kingdom?
If only she hadn't shown this yandere, Menhera-esque obsession, I might have truly fallen for her in the most textbook way—the Saintess was that benevolent and endlessly loving.
Anyway, what could I do when her inner self was a total pervert?
"In... in that case..."
The die was cast. The pan had already been set. If so, what I had to do here was propose the most appropriate deal.
"Could you... let me be alone this weekend?"
Please direct any inquiries to my DMs, respectfully.
But there was no chance in hell.
Immediately, the Saintess's face looked as if she had lost the world, and she clung to the hem of my skirt.
"Did... did I do something wrong again? Please, just tell me. If it's behavior that bothers you, I won't ever do it again in my life. Please, why would you say such a thing? Tell me. I'll fix it. I'll never do it again."
Anyone watching would think I was killing her.
Trembling and pouring out tears, the Saintess.
Seriously, she just burst into tears without the slightest warning?
I'd only meant to startle her a little and then immediately follow up with what I was going to say?
"Ah... no, it's not. Your Holiness. That's not it... it's just that there's no way Your Holiness could ever be a discomfort, and... just as Your Holiness cares for me, I, too, care for Your Holiness, you know. So, first, please, calm down..."
If I'd joked a second time, she'd probably have hanged herself.
And if that happened, I'd be hanging right alongside her and going to hell.
"...Could you say that again?"
At some point, the Saintess had stopped crying.
But she didn't lift her face, buried in the hem of my skirt.
"...That there is no way Your Holiness could be a discomfort, that part?"
Still, at least she'd stopped crying hard.
She wouldn't want to show an ugly face to the one she loved.
And so, as I always did, I familiarly stroked her head and asked her again.
Because if I didn't take care of her mental state, I felt like I'd die.
"...No, what you said after that."
I felt like I could see a tail.
A tail, wagging and swaying back and forth.
Enough that I could feel she was completely cheered up and smiling.
"...Just as Your Holiness cares for me."
Letting out a little "hng," the Saintess flinched slightly.
"I... I, too... care for Your Holiness... you, you know."
This was more embarrassing than a public execution.
But I had to survive, didn't I?
And besides, the Saintess liked it that much.
Play along. Even if my legs broke, my path to survival was to keep stepping to the beat the Saintess wanted.
"...As I thought, there's no way Rosaria would do that."
Learning the truth, the Saintess smiled triumphantly.
The moment I saw that expression, my face flared hot.
A feeling of heat rising up through my chest and spreading across my entire face.
Knowing it would all be over if she saw, I quickly covered my face with both hands.
"...Please, don't cover your face."
At that, the Saintess raised her body and grabbed my wrists.
"The mere act of your face being hidden robs that time of its value in my life, Rosaria. In those three seconds you just hid your face, that time in this world lost all worth to me."
I didn't quite think my face held that much brand value?
And be that as it may, it didn't matter.
I just had no desire to show her my embarrassed face.
But unfortunately, resistance was only possible when both parties had equal strength.
A sickly girl without a single muscle couldn't possibly overcome the Saintess's benevolent touch (with a fair amount of physical force attached).
In the end, that face was revealed to the whole wide world.
And the moment she saw it, the Saintess began licking her lips.
Then, just like that, she pushed that frail body down onto the bed and pinned it.
The sight of the Saintess straddling my body.
Her hair, cascading down, curtained my vision.
So the only thing I could see was the Saintess's face.
Since that was all that entered my vision, even my thoughts were filled with nothing but it, and I was gradually becoming a wreck, when—
Her ragged, heated breath brushed my cheek.
Her expression, warped with love, entered my eyes unfiltered.
Enough that I couldn't escape, the Saintess was pressing her will upon me.
It was when my mind was completely filled with pink like that.
The Saintess lowered her head.
At the same time, I felt something touch my cheek.
It was soft, moist, and warm.
As I recognized it, my brain gave up on thinking.
Rosaria's body, which had become a broken doll.
But I couldn't not see the Saintess's face right before my eyes.
A smile of delight and a flush of embarrassment coexisted.
It was beautiful enough to be difficult to capture even in a painting,
and thanks to that, my face kept burning the entire time I looked.
"...So, please, don't hide your face in front of me."
Then, a sweet demand began ringing in my ear.
"And nothing frightens me so much as your lies. Please don't test me. For I am always sincere with you, Rosaria. Your Saintess, your Canaria, never speaks falsehoods before love. So you, too, please don't tell me such heartless lies. For that brief moment is so very agonizing to me."
Of course, what followed was the usual breathless confession.
It was the first time I had seen her so openly angry.
The proof was that, unlike usual, she wasn't being whiny or clingy.
There was a coldness, like a venomous snake about to swallow a person whole.
Was this what it meant to express cynical fury?
"...Yes, I'll keep that in mind."
And I, pinned down by that Saintess, surrendered.
In that instant, I felt my heart start racing like mad.
Then, perhaps because the tension had been released all at once, the strength drained from my body.
So even lying down, it was hard to get up.
"...So, what was it you were trying to say?"
The Saintess naturally lay down beside me.
Putting us at the same eye level, she waited for an answer.
But honestly, there was no real special reason.
"...I was just worried that Your Holiness might not be able to spend your weekends freely because of me, so I made that request."
I'd learned a bit about the life of a priest from books.
Eat and pray, eat and recite liturgical texts, eat and cultivate holy power.
And before bed, review all of the above—that kind of life.
Wasn't that a priest's life, one where you'd drop out within a week if you lacked faith? Even if weekends were supposedly free, I wouldn't want that. And such a life was surely too much for the Saintess, a young girl.
So I had simply hoped that at least on weekends, the Saintess could rest comfortably and heal her weary mind and body, heated throughout the week.
"...Rosaria really is a fool."
That wasn't something I wanted to hear from you, though?
"You are a patient. A patient suffering from an illness that is difficult even for my divine power as Saintess to easily cure. And you are also the person I love."
The Saintess gave a small, soft laugh.
That sight was truly dazzlingly beautiful.
"How could a weekend spent leaving that person all alone possibly be happy? Truly... does Rosaria not even know such a simple truth? That's why I'm teasing you and calling you a fool."
Having said that, while I couldn't move, the Saintess intertwined her fingers with mine.
"Until you become healthy, there is no rest for me, Rosaria."
The formal, honorific words she so incongruously spoke. Even a fool would know that those words were the hundred-percent truth.
"Until you go to heaven, I will continue to make your life happy. For that is the only way I know to take responsibility for the one I love. And even if you do go to heaven, remaining by your side and taking responsibility for eternity is also my duty, the duty of I, Canaria, the Saintess. So please, do not worry about me, and tend to your own life first. For that, in turn, is my happiness."
Then, just like that, with our fingers still intertwined, she closed the distance.
Is it not said, if someone strikes your left cheek, offer your right as well?
Because the Saintess had kissed my left cheek, she kissed my right cheek too.
And so, with kiss marks newly stamped on both cheeks, the game of Go Fish wagering the date and weekend confinement had begun. And as expected, that flawless, perfect Saintess, having mastered even gambling, succeeded in claiming the weekend date ticket with the sickly young noblewoman through sheer skill.
'That aside, she really can't act.'
When there were only the last two cards left,
her expression shifted dramatically every time the direction of my hand changed.
So it was incredibly easy to read, and it grated on my nerves something fierce.
"Anyway... I didn't lose to skill... for real..."
Thinking that, I stared blankly out the window the Saintess had departed through.
The stars were gleaming disgustingly beautifully.
The Milky Way, lined up as if laughing while drawing an arc.
Seeing it, a smile like the Milky Way bloomed on my lips as well.
Along with the thought that perhaps this wasn't such an entirely detestable life after all.