Birthday Banquet Blues
“─Thank you all for attending the birthday banquet of my household today. Please eat, drink, and enjoy yourselves to the fullest.”
With the duke's crisp speech, the banquet kicked off in earnest. The hall buzzed with chatter as guests formed their little cliques. Truly living up to the romance-fantasy name. The spread of food and liquor on display was dazzling beyond words. Gulp. I wanted just one sip of that. No one here even knows Ideal's age anyway. It's been nearly three months since I arrived in this world without touching a drop. To be precise, I couldn't drink.
How could I? Forget drinking—I couldn't even lay a hand on a bottle. I'd been too busy tending to Ashu every single day.
And honestly, it's the same now. With everything that could happen today still a complete unknown—when, where, what—I couldn't risk clouding my judgment with alcohol. In the end, all I could do was envy those gulping down their drinks with such relish.
I wonder what liquor in this world tastes like. I was dying to know, but all I could do was swallow hard, swapping booze for saliva.
“Ahem, ahem.”
Lost in a daze, staring at glasses emptying faster than I could blink, I heard a fake cough from beside me.
“…Disciple?”
Ashu stood there, arms crossed, looking all pouty.
“What are you doing over here?”
“And what about you, Disciple…?”
Just moments ago, he'd been surrounded by people. …Not that I mind staying out of sight. Better that way. I was keeping a safe distance, ready to jump in if trouble brewed.
“Oh, I left it to Ray.”
Ashu jerked his thumb over his shoulder. At the end of that gesture, there was Sihan Kan Hart, sweating bullets and fumbling awkwardly.
…Kinda feel bad for him now. But after the weird misunderstanding he'd jumped to about me and Ashu earlier, he deserved a little suffering. Clearing that up had drained me completely.
[S-Si-Sihan! It's really not like that, okay? This is just a master-disciple thing, yeah? Pure affection between teacher and student!!]
Ashu had looked utterly shocked when he overheard me saying that. I still had no idea what part of it stunned him so much. To anyone watching, it was just a beautiful scene of a mentor embracing her disciple.
After my relentless persuasion, Sihan Kan Hart had finally nodded reluctantly, though his expression screamed he wasn't fully convinced. It was so frustrating I could've jumped out of my skin. Thinking back, maybe he could suffer a bit more.
…Anyway.
“You two seem pretty chummy now, huh?”
“…It's not like that.”
Ashu snorted and turned away.
“Just owe him a little debt, that's all.”
“…A debt?”
Ashu Kan Hart, of all people, in debt? Is he embarrassed? He had his cute side like this sometimes. I'd pegged him as a spoiled brat who never listened, but moments like these made him seem almost childlike. I chuckled warmly and ruffled his hair.
“People are watching! What the hell are you doing?!”
“Aw, what's the big deal?”
“…You're acting weird today. Different somehow.”
I shrugged, and Ashu narrowed his eyes at me suspiciously.
“Like you've let go of some lingering regrets or something.”
Sharp as ever. I laughed awkwardly, caught off guard.
“Oh, well, it's your birthday today, Disciple. And you even accepted my gift. I'm just happy, that's all. Haha.”
“…Is that really it?”
“O-Of course!”
His half-lidded eyes bored into me for a long moment. Tension prickled down my back, making it damp with sweat. Finally, Ashu sighed and pointed somewhere with his finger.
“I'm going to eat. Come with.”
“Ah, got it….”
Oh no, that table's packed. And we're sitting together? Why do noble banquets always mean cramming everyone at these massive shared tables?! For a lifelong solo diner like me from my past life, it was overwhelming. I'd sooner slice through enemies than people…. Cutting steak in front of a crowd wasn't easy. My nerves jangled. I swallowed hard and trailed after Ashu.
“Hey, what the—watch it, you punk!!”
A slightly flippant voice rang out from the table. Sure enough, Byrn was grinning and waving me over, tapping the chair beside him invitingly.
“…Tch.”
Ashu's face twisted openly in annoyance as he turned that way.
“Whoa, that scarf suits you. Who gave it to you?”
“….”
Ashu ignored him lightly and plopped into a chair.
“Sis, sit here too. Plenty of room.”
“Ah, y-yeah….”
I mumbled awkwardly and sat. Byrn made me uneasy. More than uneasy—my stomach churned. Especially after our garden chat earlier.
I sat and chewed a hunk of meat like rubber, swallowing it down. Felt like indigestion. My gut twisted…. But condition aside, I had to check.
…Good, no poison at least. My plate was safe.
Wait, Ashu!
I glanced over just as he was about to pop a fully sliced piece into his mouth.
“Nom─!!”
Without a second to think, Ideal's body moved faster than ever before. Ashu didn't even react—he just handed the meat over to me. I chomped it down guiltily, chewed thoroughly, and swallowed. Only then did Ashu speak, utterly baffled.
“…What the hell was that?”
…Oops.
My body had moved on instinct. Up front, Byrn was chuckling like it was the funniest thing.
“Uh, um….”
What excuse to make…? Brainstorm, Ideal!! Come up with something!! My status said Intelligence F, but I wasn't that dumb. Total slander. Time to show my quick wits.
“Y-Y-Your portion looked tastier, Disciple…!!”
“─What?”
“Eek!!”
His eyes flashed with a chilling blue glare. I trembled, bracing for the disaster about to strike.
“…Ha.”
Ashu sighed in disbelief and sliced another piece. He lightly speared it with his fork. The pink-tinged meat drew closer.
“…Hey, eat this too.”
“P-Pardon?”
“Eat it.”
“Y-Yes…!!”
Under his stern command, I stuffed my mouth full. The tender flower sirloin melted with flavor. I'd scarfed the last one too fast to savor, but now ecstasy made my mouth water.
…It is delicious.
The duke wasn't duke for nothing. A banquet like this meant prepping dozens of these dishes at minimum.
Ashu speared a piece for himself and shoveled it in greedily, practically licking the fork.
…Seeing that makes me feel kinda guilty. If I'd tried harder, if Ashu and the duke's relationship had improved…. Maybe he'd eat like this every day.
“…What? Why're you staring like that? Got something to say?”
“Nothing.”
“Your face says otherwise.”
Ashu carefully unwrapped his scarf, wary of sauce stains, then eyed my moping expression. Under that silent pressure, like he was demanding I spill, I blurted it out.
“…Just, eating this made me realize my cooking up till now was kinda… y'know.”
I flushed even saying it, my face burning, legs rubbing together nervously.
Ashu wiped sauce from his mouth casually.
“What're you talking about?”
Fair enough—it sounded ridiculous even to me. Of course there's a gap between an amateur and a pro chef. So naturally, this tasted better to him.
“Yours tastes better to me.”
“Huh…?”
My head snapped up at the unbelievable words. Ashu crossed his arms firmly, face matter-of-fact.
“I said yours is tastier.”
“D-Disciple….”
Something twanged sweetly in my chest. Who knew our little brat could say something so sweet? His dazzling growth was blinding.
“…Sorry to kill the mood, but since I'm here and all.”
I whipped around in shock. Right—Byrn was with us!
Gyaaaaah!
My brain overheated, words stumbling out in fragments.
“Uh, um….”
“You two lovebirds are cute and all, but spare a thought for the guy in front.”
Byrn grinned, propping his chin.
L-Lovebirds?! What the—?!
“L-Lovebirds?! What the hell are you talking about!!”
Ashu slammed the table, face beet red. Byrn smirked and pointed at Ashu's fork.
“You were licking it clean pretty eagerly.”
“Urk, th-that was…!! Just 'cause the meat's good!!”
Ashu bellowed, all riled up.
“The fork?”
“The meat's good, I said!”
“Uh, um….”
Byrn and Ashu bickered. I hovered in the middle, brain fried. It was peaceful. Fun, even. Part of me prayed for it to end from sheer embarrassment, but another wished it'd last forever.
Just as the lively banquet rolled on—
“KyaAAAAAHH!!”
A bloodcurdling scream pierced the air, plunging the hall into stunned silence. An oppressive, underwater murkiness smothered the room in an instant. One truth I'd learned on the battlefield: peace never comes to those who crave it most.
I gripped my pounding heart and bolted toward the scream, praying desperately it was nothing serious.