Chicken from the Heavens

Lavanius walked at an incredible pace despite being an old man.

The royal guards, the Filthy Thief, and the Dim-Eyed Hunter escorted him together.

Come to think of it, the Filthy Thief had mentioned approaching the guards to create weaknesses, hadn't he?

As expected, Teacher Lavanius stormed straight into the Guard Headquarters first.

Crash!

An old man with a long beard billowing behind him appeared, smashing the door of the stone building.

The desk-bound guards shot to their feet in alarm.

But the moment they saw the old man's face, they turned pale, and when they spotted the royal guards following behind him, their faces went ashen.

"Receive the imperial decree!"

"Ah, L-Lord Lavanius! You're safe!"

The man who appeared to be the guard captain rose with a deathly pale face.

A single feather was stuck in his hair, and his well-developed muscles marked him as a typical warrior.

Huh? I can hear their voices?

Kim Hwang-je sat up in bed and rested his chin on his hand.

"Ah, so this is it."

While rescuing the Minister of Internal Affairs, he had gained the ability to manage civil servants.

He had wondered what kind of skill it was,

but it turned out to be one that not only let him observe the officials but also translated their conversations.

So now, as Kim Hwang-je watched Lavanius glare at the guard captain from his bed, his heart pounded with excitement.

Wasn't watching someone get roasted the most entertaining thing in the world?

"I'm so relieved. I thought I'd never see you again…!"

The captain rubbed his hands together as he approached Lavanius.

But Teacher Lavanius's voice was ice-cold.

"So you're the leader of the pig herd that eats garbage?"

Lavanius's scathing tone.

"Pardon?"

"You filthy pig! Finish eating the garbage they left behind!"

Lavanius pulled several parchment letters from his robes and threw them at the captain's feet.

The guard captain trembled violently as he looked at the letters.

"Read them aloud!"

The captain's hands shook as he picked up the fallen documents one by one.

"Ah…"

"Fine. I'll read them for you. 'If you don't raise the kickbacks from pickpocketing and kidnapping operations, there will be no more protection.' 'We need to skim the jewels, so bring more drugs. We have to get the workers addicted.'"

Lavanius read several more notes after that.

Every single one was filled with horrific crimes.

"That's not true! It's really not! This is, well, a conspiracy, a conspiracy!"

"Hmph!"

The Filthy Thief snorted beside him.

The evidence had been obtained through theft that left no witnesses.

Seeing that look in the thief's eyes, the guard captain collapsed to his knees.

"It's a misunderstanding! A real misunderstanding!"

"A misunderstanding? You dare suck the blood of His Majesty's people, addict his subjects, and skim the jewels, yet still deny your ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠crimes?"

Lavanius glared at the guard captain.

"It would be far too merciful for me to judge you. Therefore, His Majesty shall decide your fate!"

"W-What?!"

"Throw this man into 218 Prison!"

"Haha, gladly!"

Thwack!

The thief rushed forward, struck the guard captain, hoisted him onto his shoulder, and disappeared.

Medieval politics were something else!

Instant judgment was something else!

The other guards stared with wide eyes at the sudden incident.

Yet none of them dared to step forward in front of the royal knights.

"Grr…"

The hunter growled like a beast.

The guards shrank their necks like frightened dogs.

Lavanius spoke.

"Guard Edlin."

"Yes, Lord Lavanius."

A red-haired female warrior who had been standing in the corner stepped forward.

"According to the investigation, you were relatively clean. From now on, you are the guard captain. Keep your subordinates in line, establish order, and ensure the people's safety."

"Yes!"

"Make sure no one forgets His Majesty's dignity, and if you sense any hint of rebellion, remind them that the doors of 218 Prison stand open."

"Yes!"

"Listen well, all of you! Now that I, Lavanius, am once again in charge of internal affairs, I will not tolerate any more corruption!"

He glared at the guards with fiery eyes.

"Before long, your former captain will write you a letter. Reading it together should be quite entertaining…"

Kim Hwang-je lay in bed and chuckled.

Grandpa was incredible.

Kim Hwang-je pressed Y.

Judging by the crimes this guy had committed, they were no ordinary offenses.

Human trafficking and drugs?

In a country on the verge of collapse, all sorts of vermin were bound to crawl out.

Even rebels were counted in "heads"…

"Oh right, there was prison labor."

Kim Hwang-je pushed Lavanius's "Royal Purge Mode" aside for a moment and pressed the Prison Labor button in 218 Prison.

"Only two facilities, huh."

But even if there were more, there was no need to hesitate.

Kim Hwang-je immediately dragged all the prisoners and dumped them into the Petroleum Slime Cave.

"Kkiruk? Kkirururu!"

"Ural! Uralaltai!"

The goblins rushed into the cave first.

"Kyuu!"

They grabbed the rolling slimes and brought them to the orcs.

Soon, the orcs paired up and squeezed the slimes like wringing out cloth.

Other goblins placed prepared jars underneath to catch the slime oil.

"Uga uga!"

"Kuryeo! Kuryeo!"

"An kuryeo!"

An orc smacked a goblin on the head.

"Kaak! Bad bad!"

Was it just his imagination, or could he actually understand what they were saying?

Either way, being monsters, they worked properly.

When a goblin placed an oil jar on the mine cart, a troll pushed it outside.

The Experts waiting outside, wearing masks, sorted the jars and stored them neatly.

"Not bad. Division of labor works well. Much better than having people do it."

Still, Kim Hwang-je wasn't entirely satisfied.

"Hmm… This can't compare to a massive oil field that pumps out tens of thousands of barrels a day…"

Middle Eastern crude oil was still being imported, albeit in small quantities.

They were still easily extracting 50,000 barrels per day from a single oil field.

One barrel was 158 liters, which meant a daily output of 7.9 million liters.

Could they extract 7.9 million liters a day by manually squeezing slimes?

"Doesn't seem possible…"

Still, you had to measure to know for sure, so he started calculating.

The slimes were bigger than expected.

They were the size of small calves.

Even if squeezing one slime yielded 10 liters,

they would need to squeeze 790,000 slimes a day to match the Middle Eastern field's daily output of 7.9 million liters.

"But there really are endless slimes down there."

He couldn't even gauge how deep the cave was, yet it was packed with slimes.

"Kyuuu!"

Another slime was squeezed dry.

Strong orcs could squeeze one slime every 20 seconds by working in pairs.

That was 180 slimes per hour. Working in shifts around the clock, they could process 4,320 slimes.

Two orcs working all day could produce 43,000 liters.

"Huh? That's better than I thought?"

If he could gather over 720 orcs to work in day and night shifts, they might actually match the daily output of a Middle Eastern oil field.

After all, there were truly endless slimes, and they could be reused!

Of course, they would also need trolls to transport the oil and goblins to catch the slimes, plus plenty of other things…

"Mathematically, it's possible!"

Besides, this could be done right now, before even building a production line.

Setting up a factory line would cost a lot ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠of money, but monsters were free!

Alright. In that case, he needed to capture as many monsters as possible and throw them in.

With that thought, Kim Hwang-je looked for Bahu.

If the plausible meeting was over, he could send Bahu to catch more orcs…

"Huh?"

But things were different from what he expected.

Bahu was kneeling with his hands raised, being punished alongside Gemini.

Wait, why were the two of them being punished together?

Kim Hwang-je stood nearby and pressed down on the supervisor lady's shoulder, where a whip rested.

"Why are they being punished?"

She spoke while looking up at the sky.

"Your Majesty. The two of them fought and are now being scolded by the King."

The supervisor lady said while gazing upward.

"Ah… I see."

The eyes behind the butterfly mask were smiling.

She let it go for now, but there was something faintly terrifying about her.

"Yes, Your Majesty. Gemini kept poking at Bahu's mask and even tried to take off his shirt, saying she wanted to see, so Bahu grabbed his spear."

Fair enough.

Being an undead, he was probably already sensitive about his body.

"So Dave gave them both a good smack and is now punishing them. Dave said Bahu's fate is no longer in his hands and that he can only hope for Your Majesty's mercy, with a long sigh."

For someone saying ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠that, the King was punishing them quite thoroughly.

Still, having a former friend become undead must have left him with complicated feelings.

Perhaps Gemini had tried to lighten the mood and only made things worse.

Kim Hwang-je nodded.

Instead of a tearful reunion, it was Bahu getting scolded by Dave.

"It's nice that they feel like family."

It would be good if that guy could pay off his debt soon and find peace.

…Though with the sheer number of crimes he'd committed, repaying a trillion units would probably require looting an entire Demon King's treasury.

Wait, would that even be enough?

At that thought, Bahu suddenly seemed to have hope.

"Anyway, keep a close watch and make sure there are no issues with their reunion. Got it? Comfort them a bit too. If they loot the Demon King's castle, they might be able to pay off the debt."

"Yes, Your Majesty. Leave it to me. I'll make sure to motivate them to loot the Demon King's castle!"

Well, that wasn't exactly what he meant.

Still, the supervisor lady bowed gracefully like a cat.

She was like a hero in the cat position.

"Ah, and the chicken will be arriving soon."

"Yes, Your Majesty. But what is chicken?"

"It's edible chicken."

"Understood. I will relay the message."

Even with civil servant management, he could only eavesdrop, and conversation was impossible unless it was in the Monster Management dimension.

Dave perked up his ears at the supervisor lady's words.

"Did something happen? Did you speak with His Majesty?"

"Indeed. He mentioned something called 'chicken'—apparently it's a type of bird. He said he would send it."

"Oh. He means to send us steamed chicken?"

Dave looked delighted at just that.

But this was no samgyetang.

* * *

"Boss?"

Knock knock.

There was a knock at the door.

Kim Hwang-je had been watching the royal castle and realized an hour had already passed.

"Yes, I'm coming out!"

Together with Seo Jun-seo, he went out to the yard, got in the car, and began touring the chicken restaurants.

Carrying boxes packed with 100 chickens, he sent them to the royal castle.

The chicken landed first in front of Dave, Gemini, Bahu, and the supervisor.

Of course, Baekju and Sirius were there too, and the two of them suddenly burst into tears, rolling on the ground and pounding the floor.

"Waaah…! Your Majesty! Thank you!"

"Waaah! Sob sob!"

Wait, what the heck was that?

Kim Hwang-je rubbed his eyes and confirmed their reaction again.

Medieval castles weren't like Korea's floor seating, so the actual floor was nothing but dirt.

Yet they were genuinely rolling on the ground, getting filthy, without a care, just to wail their gratitude?

"Ah… chicken addiction symptoms."

Well, after being on Earth and then going there, of course they'd miss chicken!

Dave felt dizzy from the delicious smell, but was also startled by their reaction.

"As expected, this is an honor comparable to imperial wine!"

Dave exclaimed in admiration, bowed deeply toward the scroll, then picked up a fork and stabbed it into the boneless chicken.

The crisp sound of fried chicken reached Dave's ears and shook his stomach.

When the moist oil flowed out between the cut pieces of chicken, Dave's breathing grew heavier.

"Mmm…!"

After one bite, Dave's face turned bright red as if he were about to explode!

"Your Majesty, what kind of flavor is this that you—Mother?"

Instead of answering, Dave shoved seasoned chicken into Gemini's mouth.

Gemini did not say "Oh my."

She clearly called for her mother.

Then her face flushed bright red.

"Come forth, wines!"

Huh?

Immediately, wines answered her summoning magic and flew from her ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠tower.

As the cups passed smoothly through walls and windows and poured into wooden goblets, the smell of chicken and alcohol filled the air.

"According to His Majesty's words, he is bestowing this 'chicken' upon all the residents of the royal castle!"

"Ooooooh!"

Cheers erupted at the supervisor's words.

Dave let out a mighty lion's roar from the castle terrace.

"Hear me, all people of Adel! Today, the Emperor has bestowed upon us all the noble food called 'chicken'! Everyone, pause your work for a moment and join the banquet granted by His Majesty!"

With that resounding cry, scrolls began to cover the sky over the royal castle.

And truly infinite chicken rained down in fluffy piles, stacking up on the banquet tables.

All the working citizens, the playing children, the soldiers, Park Jo-woon and Park Su-ah, and various other refugees approached the castle.

Soldiers ran about frantically, setting up large tables and welcoming all the refugees and the starving.

"Food… is falling from the sky!"

Gemini wiped the flowing tears with the back of her hand.

Dave was also overwhelmed.

"Ah… The people are all crying…"

A sea of tears erupted everywhere.

It was tears of overflowing joy.

Bahu cried too, of course, but in his case, they were genuinely tears of sorrow.

Of course, no actual tears came out.