The Archmage's Bathhouse Blunder
The top floor of a colossal spire that pierced the clouds at the empire's northernmost edge housed the office of Lize, the Master of the Magic Tower, overseer of the continent's accumulated wisdom. The chamber was usually steeped in absolute silence, but now dozens of mana charts cluttered the air, flickering with ominous red pulses.
Lize swept her cold gaze across the cracked mana measurement orb. “The Black Mane Mountains in the south… Just what in the world is happening there? It was supposed to be an unremarkable range, yet the density is off the charts. These are the kind of waves you only see during the incantation phase of ninth-circle magic.”
A chilling excitement threaded through her voice. She instinctively understood this was no natural phenomenon. It had to be the awakening of a slumbering ancient dragon, or perhaps a mythical artifact from the age of legends finally revealing itself to the world.
“How shall we organize the investigation team, Tower Master? The imperial palace has already begun to move as well.”
The trembling assistant beside her asked about the inexplicable disturbance. Lize snorted and tightened her grip on her staff.
“We don’t have the luxury of sending a mere investigation team. A mana source of this concentration could redraw the entire continental map. I will go personally and capture it.”
“But Lady Lize! Teleporting in blindly when we don’t even know what we’re facing is far too dangerous! It would be wiser to send the regular knight order ahead to—”
“Danger? The word doesn’t exist in the face of my magic. If it’s an ancient monster, I’ll force it to its knees and tame it. If it’s a treasure, I’ll simply add it to my collection.”
Lize swept her ornate silver staff through the air. A sharp tearing sound ripped across the room. The fabric of space split like paper, and a massive dimensional gate yawned open. As her body vanished into the light beyond, her mind brimmed with absolute certainty that she was about to seize a power capable of ruling the continent.
She never once imagined the destination might be someone’s bathhouse.
“…Ah, that hits the spot.”
Rodin sank deep into his private cypress-scented tub, letting the hot water envelop him. White steam rose in dreamy curls throughout the bathhouse. Eyes closed, he savored the pure comfort radiating from the spring. With only a single towel draped over him, his shoulders rose like sheer cliffs, and the powerful muscles of his chest carried the untamed energy of countless swings of a pickaxe and years of dancing along the edge of death on the battlefield.
Each time he drew breath, waves of blue mana reacted with the spring water and shimmered across his skin.
“The princess’s spending was worth every coin. Feels like my bones are melting.”
Rodin muttered in a languid daze. The mana vein surging up from deep underground flowed through his entire body, washing away the stubborn dregs of his chronic insomnia.
That was when his senses caught the unnatural twist in space.
“…Why’s it so noisy all of a sudden? More rat bastards sneaking around?”
Rodin narrowed his eyes in clear annoyance. At that exact moment, the air above the center of the bath shattered like breaking glass, and a silver explosion of light burst forth.
“O ancient beast! Kneel before the ruler of the continent—!”
Lize had charged through the dimensional gate mid-incantation, seven layered shields already deployed and the eighth-circle spell Absolute Zero fully prepared in her mind.
But instead of cold earth, her feet met hot, wet water.
Splash!
“…Huh?”
Lize looked around in utter confusion. There was no roar of an ancient dragon, no aura of a majestic temple. Only thick steam and the tickling scent of cypress filled the air. Through the mist, her eyes met those of a man wearing nothing but a towel, who was staring at her with the weary expression one might give a particularly strange intruder.
“Hey. Who the hell are you this time? Why’d you pop out of thin air over someone else’s bathwater instead of using the damn door?”
Rodin’s indifferent voice shattered the silence. Lize’s brain seemed to stall as she stared at him blankly. The upper body revealed through the steam was nothing short of perfect. Her gaze locked onto the droplets of water sliding down his corded forearms, tracing the carved lines of his abs before disappearing beneath the towel.
“M-monster… No, the mana wave is coming from right here…”
“Mana? Yeah, it leaks out a little when the hot spring’s running. But you do realize you just broke into someone else’s bath, right? Doesn’t the empire have laws against trespassing?”
“Y-you insolent brute! To appear before Lize, First Master of the Magic Tower, in such an indecent state…!”
Lize’s face flushed crimson as if it might explode. Having spent her entire life between laboratories and the pinnacle of the Magic Tower, she had zero resistance to this kind of raw, masculine presence. It struck her like a lethal poison.
“What’s indecent about wearing a towel in my own bath? Who the hell bathes fully dressed? If anything, you should’ve taken that staff of yours and gone to the women’s side. Why are you raising hell in here?”
When Rodin shrugged in clear irritation, the powerful trapezius muscles across his shoulders rippled. Lize swallowed hard without realizing it and took an involuntary step back.
“Mr. Rodin! Are you all right?!”
The bathhouse door flew open with a bang as Veronica and Ivona burst inside. They had sensed the enormous magical ripple from the teleport and rushed over in full battle readiness. Yet the scene before them was not a life-or-death struggle against an intruder.
Inside the steaming bath stood a half-naked Rodin facing off against a stunning mage whose face was beet red and whose staff trembled in her grip. The atmosphere was downright bizarre.
“What the— Who is that flashy-looking stray cat?! They’re not satisfied with teleporting into the bedroom anymore, now they’re delivering straight to the bathroom?!”
Blue fire sparked in Veronica’s eyes. Any trace of imperial princess dignity had long since vanished into the void.
“Oh Lord! That profane, sticky magical power radiating from the woman’s staff! Is she an evil witch come to defile the Cult Leader’s sacred bathwater?!”
Ivona shouted, still clutching her snack pot.
“Witch?! I am Lize, the empire’s greatest intellect and Master of the Magic Tower! Who dares call whom—”
Lize tried to reclaim her dignity, but Veronica was faster. She stepped protectively in front of Rodin and glared daggers at the newcomer.
“I don’t care if you’re the Tower Master or the queen of the moon! Mr. Rodin, get dressed right now! That woman is ogling every inch of your muscles! That body is far too valuable to be shown for free!”
“Ugh, seriously… Can’t even wash in peace. All three of you, out. I still need to scrub my back.”
Rodin’s merciless order to leave rang out, but the three women’s gazes collided violently in midair, practically crackling with sparks.
A short while later, Lize stood in the bathhouse lobby trying desperately to regain her composure. Every time she pointed her mana meter toward the bathing area, however, the device overloaded and sparked violently, making her hands tremble uncontrollably.
“I will transfer ownership of this mana source to the Magic Tower. Compensation will be more than adequate. A central imperial territory or a few thousand platinum coins should suffice, yes?”
Lize made the offer with haughty arrogance. Veronica was the one who snorted in response.
“Keep dreaming. This is private property belonging to the Rodin & Veronica Agricultural Corporation. Even a Tower Master will be charged a thousand times the normal road toll for unauthorized use. Don’t think you can just help yourself to someone else’s gold mine.”
“You ignorant fools…! To waste such a pure mana fountain as nothing more than hot spring water is a crime against all humanity!”
When Lize raised her voice, Rodin—who had been quietly munching on a cabbage nearby—replied without much interest.
“Waste? Our cabbages turn golden after drinking this stuff. Want to buy a head? I’ll give you the Tower Master discount—ten gold coins.”
“Y-you’re injecting this precious mana into… cabbages?! Preposterous! This is an insult that crosses every boundary of magical ethics!”
Lize was genuinely horrified. Yet the moment her eyes met Rodin’s, she felt her heart stutter again at the transcendent, almost otherworldly calm radiating from him.
Just who is this man…? The flow of his mana is far too refined and vast to belong to a mere muscular bandit. This requires thorough research. I must observe him up close!
In the end, the situation resolved in a rather strange manner. Rather than returning to the Magic Tower, Lize pitched a lavish magical tent in a corner of the mountain stronghold’s yard, complete with a fancy plaque that read “Mana Observation Research Laboratory,” and settled in for the long haul.
Veronica immediately presented a contract stuffed with poisonous clauses, declaring, “We will be charging monthly rent for the research site usage fee.” Ivona, for her part, welcomed the newcomer with open arms, saying, “Mages are quite useful for reheating snacks.”
“…There really isn’t a single quiet day around here.”
Rodin pulled his blanket over his head in his room. From beyond the door he could already hear the commotion—Lize shouting, “By the authority of the Master of the Magic Tower, tonight’s dinner shall be meat!” and Veronica immediately firing back, “I am the lady of this house!”
Inside her tent, Lize moved her quill across parchment while recalling the sight of Rodin’s abs from earlier.
Mana analysis is important, but… what exactly was that aura flowing through that man’s body? I need to confirm it again. This is purely academic curiosity. It has absolutely nothing to do with how broad his shoulders were.
Above the mountain stronghold, blue mana, sacred light, and sparks of magic intertwined to create a strange, shimmering haze. Rodin, meanwhile, forced himself to sleep while mentally calculating exactly how much fertilizer he would need to spread the next day.