Chapter 282
Chapter 282
The Iron Emperor — Chapter 282
"I shall immediately begin collecting and securing the water flasks carried by each soldier as well."
"That would be best. Heh-heh, those cunning heathens."
Public Marquis let out a booming laugh, but his eyes were filled with hostility and murderous intent toward Roselin.
* * *
The blazing sun continued to beat down, and the weary gait of the Holy Empire soldiers was unmistakable.
But their pace did not noticeably slow. The reason was the sweet calls of encouragement from the knights urging them on from horseback.
"Just a little further and a cool river awaits! No matter how desperately those Roselin bastards thrash about, they cannot reach the river!"
The voices of the knights shouting from all around slaked the soldiers' burning thirst.
Thud-thud-thud. Thud-thud-thud.
"The river!"
How long had they walked?
The shout of the cavalry returning from reconnaissance put even more strength into the soldiers' steps.
"Where?"
"Is that true?"
The ranks grew noisy as soldiers clamored to confirm the report. Several knights tried to quell the commotion, but their superiors smiled and raised their hands, tolerating a brief lapse in discipline.
Now was a time when morale mattered above all else.
The moment the long, wide river came into view, looking refreshing just to see it, the soldiers' hearts were already splashing in the water and cheering.
"Set up camp beside the river!"
As soon as the order came down from the command staff, the soldiers moved with more urgency than ever before.
Groups of cavalry returned from both upstream and downstream. They had been scouts checking for safety.
"Nothing unusual downstream."
"No enemy activity detected across the river either."
The wizards of the magic corps, who had flown over the river, likewise reported on schedule that the area was secure.
Public Marquis nodded in satisfaction, then led his commanders past the encampment and spoke loudly, as though deliberately letting the soldiers overhear.
"Heh-heh-heh, then as soon as the encampment is finished, let the soldiers take turns bathing in the river."
"On behalf of the soldiers, we offer our thanks for the marquis's generous consideration."
"Hoorah!"
"Long live the Holy Empire!"
It was almost like watching a well-staged play.
But the soldiers couldn't have cared less. Tired as they were from the heat and thirst, they were still in the middle of a war. In circumstances like these, simply being able to briefly soak their bodies in the river was nothing short of a gift.
Even without the nobles deliberately eliciting praise for Public Marquis, cheers erupted naturally from the soldiers' mouths.
While the encampment was being built, the supply units were filling the emptied water barrels, and the soldiers assigned to meal duty were savoring the coolness so much that it was hard to tell whether they had come to draw water or to soak in it.
For this moment, at least, they appeared utterly removed from the war.
* * *
Dozens of bamboo tubes drifted upstream of the encampment, entirely unnoticed. They reached a spot where thick foliage grew along one bank, then carefully made their way onto the shore.
"Hoo."
What emerged onto land was a Roselin soldier holding one of the tubes in his mouth. He bent low and moved cautiously into the undergrowth, then quietly crouched down and tapped something.
The brush rustled slightly. More than ten soldiers appeared.
They were not the only ones who had hidden there. From long-fallen logs to gaps in the water weeds, soldiers emerged from everywhere that could conceal a body. Over two hundred of them spread across both banks of the river.
"What's the situation?"
At the cautious question, the soldier who had removed the tube from his mouth answered quickly.
"We have to start now, and fast. Right now the enemy is busy filling their water stores, and judging by the fact that a significant number of troops are even soaking in the river, this is the optimal moment."
"You heard him. We begin immediately. Send everything we prepared downstream."
The soldiers giving the orders wore different uniforms from the ones who had delivered the report. They were troops of the Haian Kingdom army.
Using Roselin soldiers who knew the local terrain as guides, they had lain in ambush upstream along the Sineo River. It was little wonder the Holy Empire's scouts had failed to spot them.
Against a host of a hundred fifty thousand, what could a mere two hundred-odd soldiers do?
An operation on this scale was inherently impossible to anticipate. Besides, their equipment consisted of nothing more than simple daggers and the like, which made it clear that a surprise attack was not their objective.
Around a hundred soldiers on one side simultaneously lifted the sacks they had hidden and began dissolving the contents into the water. On the opposite bank, another hundred soldiers were releasing the same substance from identical sacks.
And even as they worked, several soldiers had climbed into the trees, never slackening their watch for any approaching Holy Empire scouts.
* * *
"Hmm."
Even as he raised his customary after-meal tea to his lips, Public Marquis was frowning as though something troubled him.
Gurgle.
"Krrgh."
A sound that spoke of Public Marquis's discomfort rumbled in his gut.
Clack.
A second rumble sounded inside his stomach, and Public Marquis set his teacup roughly down on the table. Then he walked out at a slightly hurried pace.
The scorching heat of the day had yet to fade; even at night, the air held a stifling warmth.
"Krhmmm."
Public Marquis's scowl deepened.
Public Marquis was a Sword Master who had reached a sublime, transcendent realm. One trait common to those counted among the Transcendents was their exceptionally sharp five senses.
And a fragrance was now riding the wind and assailing the nose of Public Marquis, who prided himself on those keen senses.
"Huh-huh, that scent is clearly...."
Public Marquis's face crumpled instantly.
The earthy, pungent aroma drifting on the wind was, in a word, the stench of feces.
The food a hundred fifty thousand soldiers consumed each day was staggering, so it stood to reason the amount they produced would be no small thing.
The problem was that tonight's output was far heavier than usual, and above all, it wasn't only his sensitive nose being assailed—the sounds grating on his ears were the real issue.
Splatter. Splrrrt.
"......"
In the darkness of the brush, an array of explosive bursts harmonized as if an imperial orchestra were performing, confirming Public Marquis's suspicion beyond any doubt.
Above all, hadn't the same affliction made even the stomach of a Transcendent like himself ache?
"Guard, immediately bring the staff officers...."
Thump.
Public Marquis hastily placed a hand on the shoulder of the sentry at the entrance to his tent and began giving the order. But his words never reached their end.
"Hnghk!"
Pfffrrrrt.
"......"
From the mouth of the guard, whose face had gone deathly pale as he broke out in a cold sweat, came a cry laced with something like despair. An instant later, the sound that had been coming from the distance erupted at close range.
Pfrrrrt! Splrrrt. Spltch!
"Ugh-hrrrrk."
The sentry looked as if his world had ended. A clamorous sputtering sounded between his legs, and something heavy dropped inside his trouser leg, releasing the expected earthy aroma.
The guard, posted as he was at the marquis's tent, had been holding it in for dear life—ready to die rather than shit himself. And the marquis's touch jolted the nerves on which the guard had concentrated every ounce of his sphincter strength.
At the man's wretchedness, Public Marquis closed his eyes with a look of utter desolation and, staring into the darkness, heaved a lament.
"Lord God. Why dost thou send such trials upon us...."
But the trial was not the end—it was only the beginning.
Pfffrrrrrrt.
"K-hrrrgh. I'm, I'm alive!"
A Holy Empire soldier crouched among the reeds groaned with a strange sense of relief.
No sooner had he bared his backside and squatted than the contents came flooding out, allowing him to gasp a breath of relief.
"Damn it, was the food spoiled?"
Clutching his aching stomach while the torrent continued, the soldier kept cursing the mess orderlies under his breath. At the same time, the noise from the end that was not his mouth also kept gushing without pause.
Splrrrrtch!
"S-son of a bitch. Now my ass is pissing. At this rate my hole's gonna be raw!"
The soldier let out a half-hearted complaint, and someone nearby, unable to restrain himself, burst out laughing.
"Which son of a bitch—ngrrrgh... hey!"
Who in the world would be in good spirits if, while they were straining with stomach pain, someone next to them was laughing?
The soldier's anger flared to its peak. At the outburst of rage, the one who had laughed seemed to feel a bit sorry, reining in his laughter and offering an apology.
"Sorry about that."
"Damn it, fine. If you've got any leaves or something over there, give 'em here."
Mollified by the apology, the soldier looked around, then asked for something to wipe with.
"Here."
"Thanks—huh? Hey, you bastard, I said leaves, not a blade...."
What was extended before the soldier, who had been reaching out his hand in welcome, was the cold blade of a sword.
The soldier, who had been about to erupt again, could no longer continue. The cold sensation that wormed its way past his Adam's apple cut his words short, and with a wet, bubbling rattle he crumpled sideways to the ground.
"Grrrrk."
Thud.
The intruders crouched low as they gathered around the soldier, who had collapsed onto his own discharge while clutching his throat.
"Good. We cause as much chaos as we can, then pull out. Everyone go over your individual objectives one more time."
"Understood."
These were the men of the Haian Kingdom's detached force.
* * *
It was not long before the Haian Kingdom's raiding party was discovered.
With even the sentries dropping their trousers from dysentery, the Haian Kingdom troops pushed in without resistance and began hurling torches at the tents. At the sight of the tents going up in flames, the Holy Empire soldiers, almost by instinct, began shouting warnings of an enemy attack.
"The enemy!"
"Agh!"
The soldiers shouting the warning were cut down first. In an instant, flames and smoke shot skyward from all over, and nobles and knights with ashen faces emerged and began rallying the troops.
"They're only a small force! Stop running around in confusion and face them calmly!"
Instinct is a terrible thing.
Even amid the flurry of blades dealing and taking death, the soldiers could barely spare a thought from clutching their aching stomachs.
Even with death bearing down upon them, absurd scenes were unfolding—men clamping their buttocks tight as though determined not to soil their trousers. Not all of them, of course.
"You morons! Just shit yourselves already! You want to die over fear of your own crap?!"
Bizarre farces were playing out, but the plain shouts of veteran soldiers proved more effective than the bellowing of the knights.
Some among them had already soiled their trousers and were now, with faces flushed red or deathly blue, channeling their fury straight at the raiders and pressing forward.