Like a Blooming Flower - 5
“Wha— Your Highness?”
I couldn’t hide my flustered expression and stood there completely at a loss. My shoulders were pinned so tightly it was hard to move. On top of that, her knee was pressing down on my abdomen.
…If I struggle, it’ll definitely end in catastrophe when Lobelia falls too.
Lobelia quietly watched me tremble. Her gaze was puzzled and even, as though she were asking, Is something wrong?
I had plenty to say. Why had she thrown me down? And why was her face this close!
“Mmm…”
The princess frowned as if something were caught in her throat and pressed her body even closer. So close our noses nearly brushed.
Damn it. Damn it all.
Her eyes, glazed from drink, stared at me without blinking. The rise and fall of her chest in time with her breathing. The strange heat made everything worse.
“Could you get off me first? People will misunderstand if they see us. Besides, we don’t have to talk about this today. You don’t look well…”
“Were you always this incoherent? Hah!”
Lobelia gave a playful kick of laughter and poked the tip of my nose with her finger. When I kept staring at her in bewilderment, she simply shrugged.
“You’re the Hawin who stayed composed in every situation. If you can’t even handle one woman, you must not have been all that impressive.”
“…I was never impressive to begin with. Also, I may need to lean forward for a moment.”
“Hm?”
The instant Lobelia let out a confused sound at the non sequitur, I seized her wrist and twisted my body sideways as though rolling. My leg hooked lightly behind her knee. She made a startled face the moment I vanished from beneath her—then flopped onto the bed.
“…Ah.”
Lobelia’s eyes rounded and she let out a small gasp. She shot me a slightly pouty glare before pushing herself up.
“How cold-hearted.”
She rubbed her wrist, muttering.
“Wasn’t it an unavoidable situation? My head could have been on a pike for execution and it still wouldn’t have been enough.”
“…Well, I had no intention of pouncing on you or anything of the sort. How could I commit such a wrong without even a proper wedding?”
Lobelia glared at me again, sulky. Her words and her actions didn’t quite match.
I naturally took hold of her shoulders, intending to guide her outside. She clicked her tongue in clear displeasure.
“Even drunk, being with you feels just as filthy.”
“Then wouldn’t distancing ourselves be the answer right now? It’s fine. People don’t grow distant through physical space, but through time and memory.”
I answered with feigned nonchalance as we reached the door. Lobelia was still scowling at my face with open dissatisfaction, so she didn’t seem to notice.
“You talk smoothly enough, but if you’re trying to send me away…”
“Yes?”
With a sharp smack she knocked my hand from her shoulder and spun around. Arms folded, she planted herself in front of the door. A smirk tugged at her lips as one eyebrow rose.
What are you going to do about it? Her eyes glittered with challenge.
“A fleeting mistake may be sweet enough to change an entire life, yet we must not allow it to go any further…”
“Hawin?”
I stepped right up to her and spoke in a calm, leisurely tone—though I lowered my voice just enough. Lobelia studied my face with a flicker of bewilderment. She had threatened me so confidently only moments ago.
“Isn’t it too great a waste to devote your whole life after falling for something so brief?”
I smiled. Her expression reminded me of a wild animal shivering all over.
“So it’s a good habit to doubt every sweet thing at least once.”
I reached behind her back. She flinched violently, eyes darting between my face and my hand in a daze. Her cheeks burned crimson.
“You—!”
“Good night?”
“Huh?”
Click. I turned the handle behind her and threw the door wide open. Lobelia made a small, embarrassed sound, clearly unsure what to do. The moment her attention locked on me, I gently turned her by the shoulders. As soon as she crossed the threshold—
Thud.
I shut the door. I let out a long breath of relief and even slid the lock into place.
Perfect.
“Hawin! You—!”
“Haha, how inexperienced. Come back after some more practice. Are you a complete blockhead? Your Highness really needs to study the art of seduction! Hahaha!”
“Next time! I’ll definitely—!”
“Definitely what?”
When I asked in a teasing lilt, the voice behind the door—thick with shame—cut off abruptly. I could easily picture Lobelia grinding her teeth, body trembling with fury. The image came to me without effort.
“Farewell, then.”
“We’ll meet again, you.”
Her tone was razor-sharp, impossible to imagine from someone who had been drinking. Only after her footsteps receded did I finally allow myself to rub my chest in relief… or so I would have, if—
“Did you really think I’d happily open the door if you pretended to leave so half-heartedly?”
“Tsk. She actually left.”
Lobelia’s footsteps faded into the distance. It seemed she had gone for good. Well, lingering too long in front of a man’s quarters would wound her pride beyond repair.
…What the hell just happened?
I pressed a hand to my forehead and tried to think.
There was no reason for Princess Lobelia to reverse her attitude so completely over a single memory. Something else had to exist. I could guess she carried real trauma, especially after she said she had to keep me near her. The compulsion had been palpable.
“Still, the fact that I can approach Princess Lobelia this easily is a definite plus.”
I would have to dig deeper into the past. Her personality would probably grow even more volatile because of it… but what choice did I have? Tsk.
“I’m losing my mind. Seriously.”
I let out a heavy sigh and muttered to myself.
I couldn’t make sense of any of it. It was so different from what I expected that I couldn’t even form a prediction. My gaze fell on the empty glass.
…Damn it.
What kind of situation is this…?
…
Lobelia stormed back toward the imperial palace, fuming. Hair wild, breath reeking of liquor—she knew she looked appalling, but she didn’t care.
Aaaagh! This is so humiliating!
She had planned to get Hawin drunk and extract his consent somehow. Instead she had gotten drunk first, shoved the man onto his own bed, and then, once she regained her senses, found herself thrown out of his quarters. Never mind her dignity as imperial princess; the whole thing was simply mortifying.
“Your Highness… what in the world happened?”
The attendant looked horrified, but Lobelia ignored her completely and strode into her room. When the servant asked again, she gave a vague, dismissive answer and collapsed onto the bed. She didn’t even have the strength to change into her nightclothes.
“Haaa…”
She turned her head toward the window. The moon had vanished; only darkness remained outside. Lobelia pressed hard against her throbbing temples and clicked her tongue.
“What on earth is going on?”
Hawin. That playful, artificial composure of his floated through her mind.
In the nightmare, someone had killed him.
I did.
Was it a vision of the future? Were memories being overlaid? She couldn’t tell. She only knew that the image of that foolish, idiotic man refused to leave her head.
“Hawin is…”
Slowly. So very slowly.
…I can’t be without him by my side.
Why? She had no answer. Would he suddenly disappear? No—he was someone whose disappearance shouldn’t matter. Yet the mere thought of him vanishing made her chest ache as if it were being torn apart.
“It’s as if I’ve already lost him once…”
Lobelia muttered the words, then her eyes flew wide. She whipped her head back toward the window.
Bang—!
A single gunshot echoed.
The most regretful thing in the world had happened.
After Hawin’s death, she had never known happiness again. Longing, regret, hatred—countless emotions layered themselves onto a single person. To harbor lingering attachment for someone already dead was utterly foolish.
…Hawin.
The more she tried to remember, the more something drifted upward. A man with a villainous grin, giggling. The one who had sharpened a blade behind that leisurely smile.
Lobelia bit her lip until it nearly bled.
“He came from the future?”
No. This was different from the future he had described. Hadn’t he said she had shot him as well? It didn’t feel like the future at all. It felt more like he had returned.
She had looked into Hawin before. He was nothing more than a countryside youth.
Yet he manipulated the nobles with terrifying skill, and he remained perfectly composed even in front of me—an imperial princess.
Who was Hawin? What was his purpose in entangling himself with her? If he simply lusted for power, he could have joined hands with Aran. If he hated this nation, he could have sold it out alongside Kalufen.
But he had done neither. His behavior was far too suspicious.
“…”
—Suspect and think until the very end. If it is you, Your Highness, you can do it. There is a famous saying that the truth is always simple…
The words Hawin had once spoken came back to her. She could not clearly recall his voice or expression at the time, yet she remembered that he had said them, and that they had lodged deep inside her heart.
The truth is simple.
“Hawin… just who are you?”
Lobelia lay on the bed, face blank, and whispered the question into the empty air.
Suspect and think until the end. What was the purpose of the man called Hawin? And why did she remember him so vividly, why did she regret so deeply?
That look in his eyes I glimpsed in the garden.
It had been only a passing moment, yet she remembered it clearly. Worry. Sadness. Bitterness. They were emotions a leisurely, artificial villain could never possess.
Clearly, Hawin was the kind of man who wore a mask—deceiving others again and again to achieve some hidden goal.
She did not understand why she felt such fierce intensity toward a man like that, but one thing had become certain.
…Hawin died for me.
Not for anyone else—for me, Lobelia.
Her memories lay in shattered fragments, yet emotions that had painted over an entire lifetime could not be erased so easily.
Lobelia closed her eyes.
“Hawin.”
With that single word.