Chapter 53
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 53
Chapter Title: I'm the Girl Who Chased Ssangssangba for Two Weeks to Eat It
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August had arrived.
The weather forecast, predicting it would be no different from July—where half the month had been filled with rain—unfortunately hit the mark for the first week of August...
But in a stroke of perfect timing, the shoot today—meant to capture our high school days—was painting a bright, sunny summer just like we remembered.
And yet. What was the point?
"A sauna... It's been forever."
The shoot today was all indoors anyway.
...Just so you know, it was 36 degrees outside.
If anything, this was better.
They'd titled it a "high school days" shoot, but in reality, I was the only one who'd actually gone to high school.
Chaewon had started training with her debut group around the age of sixteen, right before turning seventeen, and gave up on high school after middle school graduation.
After that, as everyone knows, she soared to massive success with Ever.
And during that time, with me buried in college entrance exams and all that, whenever I had free time, Chaewon was working, and when she was working, I'd be on break. We barely crossed paths—honestly, you could count our meetings on one hand until right before my college entrance exam.
There was just no overlap in our lives to make for a decent documentary about the two of us. It was awkward figuring out what even to film.
But the PD writer always pulled out something that exceeded our wildest imaginations.
"Today, we'll give you mission cards here and there, but otherwise, feel free to do whatever you want."
What would we have done together if we'd been active in the same space—school or entertainment industry—at the tail end of our teens?
Or, looking back now, what would it have been like if we'd done this or that back then? They'd surveyed us beforehand about those hypotheticals...
And today, they turned those into mission cards for an "observational variety show" format.
So from the start of filming, we got our first mission card...
To. Yumin & Chaewon
Chaewon's Bucket List: Hang out together at a sauna!
Fight fire with fire! We're heading to a sauna—one of the places Chaewon wanted to go if she'd been a high schooler.
Go back and forth between the scorching hot kiln room and the cool ice room, enjoy a full sauna session, then dig into sauna specialties like tasty boiled eggs, sikhye, ramen, and more. Have as much fun as high schoolers would~.
...And that's how we ended up at a sauna in Songpa-gu.
"Whoa, are you the owner here?"
"Visuals-wise, you're the madam."
"You look totally like an old dude in that."
"Guess even idols can't escape the sauna uniform."
The cozy, hearty interior and scent unique to saunas.
We emerged from the lockers at almost the same time, and the moment we saw each other in those baggy clay-colored sauna outfits, the friendly banter poured out.
"No, but isn't this kinda tasteless? Why didn't you do the bun head?"
"Bold statement: I've never once done a bun head at a sauna."
"That's something to brag about."
"...So you want a knuckle sandwich?"
"I knew it...! I brought your towel too~."
As I grinned and clenched my fist, the bratty one hurriedly unfurled an orange towel from behind her back.
She plopped down cross-legged on the floor and neatly shaped it into a bun head.
"...No, I said I don't wanna wear it."
"After all my hard work, you're not gonna use it?"
"Hard work? It took three seconds."
"Oh? So anything under three seconds isn't hard work?"
"Yours definitely isn't."
"...You little punk. Look at you being so firm. Why not just admit you're embarrassed to wear a bun head?"
She's got razor-sharp instincts for this stuff.
"...I just don't wanna do what everyone else does? Hipster vibes?"
"Says the one who's the only one here with a bun hat right now. Shouldn't you be the one wearing it then?"
"......"
"Kang Yumin. You tried to play hipster and got totally caught."
The bratty one paced back and forth in front of me, holding up the bun with a smug look.
"Ow?!"
I had no choice but to flick her forehead—thwack.
"Ugh...?! You just declared war?!"
"Gimme the bun head. I'll wear it."
No way was I facing off against her stubborn determination, so I subtly tilted my head forward, signaling her to put it on.
Her focus had already shifted from the flick to getting the bun on Kang Yumin's head, so the standoff ended easily.
"...Whoa, this feels weird."
"What's wrong? It's cute. Let's take a pic."
She leaned in a bit and looked at the camera.
Seeing myself with the bun head on screen was pretty embarrassing, but like she said, everyone's doing it.
I flashed a small smile, followed her lead with a V-sign...
"Yay~. Kang Yumin's got some sneaky cuteness~?"
"...Right? I'm cute."
"...Shameless jerk. Look at you switching gears. So annoying."
Our V-sign hands both had the couple bracelets from the last shoot, dangling side by side.
After the photo, we headed straight to the restaurant to fill our growling stomachs.
It was around 11 a.m. on a weekday at a sauna—no one around.
Thanks to that, we could lounge in the empty restaurant at our leisure.
"Whoa, I wanna try everything without skipping a single one. Why are there so many delicious things in the world?"
Kimbap, pork cutlet, ramen, seaweed soup, spicy pork stir-fry, tteokbokki, beef stew, knife-cut noodles, dumplings, cold noodles, bibim guksu, and more.
Chaewon's eyes sparkled at the lineup that rivaled a kimbap chain.
"What's the one you wanna eat most?"
"First, ramen, kimbap, pork cutlet, spicy pork, tteokbokki. And..."
"There's two of us? Even if we order a lot, it's three or four dishes max."
"Seriously, Kang Yumin. Why can't you eat more? If you had a bigger appetite, we could've added two more..."
Just like the devil's daughter she is, the bratty one spouts nonsense.
I always wonder what goes on in her head at times like this.
"Tteokbokki's a must, right?"
"Absolutely. No question."
"Wanna go full snack mode then?"
"...Yeah. Sorry bibim guksu, spicy pork, seaweed soup, and beef stew, but unnie's going snacks today."
"Auntie, ramen and tteokbokki for us, plus tuna kimbap."
"Pork cutlet too. One cheese pork cutlet as well, please."
"...We can finish all this, right?"
"Totally. Don't say we should order more later? We've got eggs and sikhye coming up."
"...You're going wild 'cause it's your break."
"You bet. I earned this money to eat good stuff. On that note, while we wait for the food, let's do a ultimate chicken dish ideal type world cup."
Chicken? There's none here—what's that even mean?
———
I held back from pointing that out, so before eating, we talked chicken; during the meal, it was about the origins of sundae; and now, heading off with sikhye and boiled eggs, it's about nakgopsae.
...Have you been starving since that camping trip?
"Sauna. Eggs. And that deliciously plump forehead."
"...My forehead's tougher than the stone floor. Stop trying to add variety show flair to the vlog."
"What you're saying is like telling a comedian not to be funny or a teacher not to teach. We're filming just us—how can we not do variety?"
The first Japan vlog hitting ten million views was partly because we were straight-laced best friends, but after that, our chemistry spread by word of mouth.
Probably that top YouTube comment calling us the "comedy duo of conviction."
...We've never even done comedy?
If anything, what's fun about me putting up with her nonsense all day?
People's tastes are a mystery, I thought, taking a sip of sikhye...
"Loser pays—rock paper scissors!"
The sudden call caught me off guard, and I reflexively threw scissors.
"Hey, part your bangs and expose that forehead."
Her habit of throwing rock first thing was still there.
"...Forehead? What're you talking about?"
"Gotta crack the egg. You planning to weasel out like some fancy lady?"
"Weasel what? We didn't even bet anything. Just played rock paper scissors."
"...Oh, you're gonna play it like that?"
"......"
"Fine. I'll be generous. No forehead hits then—"
"What? Obviously we bet foreheads."
The moment I gave in, she switched up instantly.
And muttering "Dang, lost again...?" showed she still had a ways to go.
"I'll throw scissors next."
"...And if you don't?"
"Then I lose. But if I lie and win two in a row, your forehead's mine?"
"Hey, even if you're Seoul Uni material, I've got a brain and know probability?"
"So what's the odds I lie and win two straight?"
"......"
"......"
"...Rock, paper, scissors...!!"
She ditched the probability and went straight for it, the competitive Han.
She tends to throw rock when provoked, so I went paper...
"...One more left?"
"For real. Don't mess around, Kang Yumin. How do you even beat this?"
I won again, and she let out disbelieving laughs, this era's gambler Han.
"Wipe the oil off your forehead. Doesn't crack right if it's greasy—hurts more."
"...Seriously, if I catch you. That forehead? I'm making a bump on it today."
She spun her fist in front of me—did boxing give her that snap?
Better not push it or I might lose, so I shut up...
"Rock paper scissors...!!"
"Rock paper scissors."
We called it in sync this time.
"...This is ridiculous!!!"
Spotting her chance, she cracked the egg on my forehead with killer snap. The hard-headed one flopped dramatically onto the floor.
Whoa, overacting much.
Anyone'd think I hit her with a hammer.
"Hey, your forehead's so pretty, the egg cracked nice too."
I peeled it and showed it right in front of her lying face.
Like distracting a picky kid with airplane games, I went all out with the stairs...
———Whoosh.
"...Whoosh?"
Something zipped between my eyes.
I stiffly turned my head a few times, and there was her fist holding an egg.
"...Declaring seriously: Rock paper scissors is over. I'm done."
"Just take the hit."
"You think Forever would approve seeing me like this?"
"Forever's on my side, so fine."
"Your personality's in question now..."
"Bring it on—let the controversy fly-?!"
Defend my forehead at all costs.
"Stop now and I'll spare you the KO?!"
Hearing that, Han Chaewon bolted into the unbeatably hot steam room...
"...I'm the girl who chased Ssangssangba for two weeks just to eat it."
Ah, self-own.