Turns Out He's a Crafting Genius (1)

"Are you going to do it again or not?!"

"I won't. I swear."

I'd been getting chewed out for dozens of minutes straight. No matter how pretty Sophia was, this was getting old. I kept saying I wouldn't do it again — why did she keep scolding me? Was my sincerity not getting through?

Probably because it wasn't sincere. Honestly, my first real-life sex ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠had been incredible. And it wasn't with some ordinary person — it was a beautiful elf.

If the chance came up again, I was using Impregnating. Sophia could nag all she wanted. She couldn't stop me.

"Then... um..."

I hadn't said a word, yet Sophia made a little humming sound and started watching my face carefully.

"Are you sulking?"

"Huh? No."

I genuinely wasn't. Getting pouty over something like this would make me a brat, not an adult. Honestly, I was grateful she'd given me the chance to sleep with an elf in the first place.

"I'm sorry... I went too hard on you, didn't I?"

"No, really..."

Wait. Was this a free win? Time to work Sophia's guilt a little.

"Okay, honestly? You did go pretty hard."

"Ah... so it was that bad. I'm sorry. It's not because I hate you. It's just — if you do that again in a real battle against another minion, who knows what could happen, and also..."

"Also what?"

"I don't want some other god to snatch you away... Dohoyo let it slide today, but you never know..."

Ah. So the nagging came from worry. Fair enough. People only nag when they care. All of it came from affection.

"I-I, um... I'm really sorry..."

"Then can I get a hug?"

"Huh? Oh! Of course! Come here!"

Sophia spread her arms awkwardly. She'd hugged me just fine earlier — why was she getting shy now? I pulled the hesitant goddess into a firm embrace.

"Hyut!"

Her whole body trembled with tension. The part of her that was very much part of her body trembled right along with it, squishing and rubbing against me. Was this for real? How massive did a chest have to be that I had to stretch my arms all the way out just to wrap around her back?

Huge breasts were invincible. Huge breasts were divine.

"Is that enough...?"

"Yeah."

I'd enjoyed it plenty. Time to save the rest for next time.

When I let go, Sophia checked her clothes. She kept tugging and stretching her one-piece dress, and every time she did, the outline of her nipples pushed out in a soft bulge right in the middle of her chest.

Those were called pokies, right? Extremely hot. The fact that they turned me on more than Evrande's bare breasts somehow proved the old saying true — a little covered was sexier than fully naked.

But Sophia was spending an awfully long time fussing around her chest area.

"Sophia?"

"Ah — aah! Ahem! Anyway! We're good now, right?"

"Yes."

"Could there be more fights coming? Your stamina's recovered, but I read a post saying not to send minions into consecutive battles because it drains mental energy too."

"Where'd you read that?"

"In a newbie tip thread!"

"Can I see it too? For all we know, the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠stuff I hate doing is listed as a tip."

"You think so?"

Sophia conjured up a screen again. This time the community name was visible. I'd been hoping for something snappy like CC or Hemco or Goddess Era — instead it was the boringly literal Game of the Gods.

On the right sat a nickname and a notification bell. Sophia's handle was "UltimateNewbie"?

"Don't look!"

Sophia frantically covered her nickname. Her ears had gone bright red — which made me wonder if her chest had flushed the same color.

Or maybe her ass had gone red like a monkey's. Ah, wait — an ass only turns red if you spank it. Someday, when I finally got my wish, Sophia's rear was going to catch fire.

"I didn't see a thing, UltimateNewbie-nim."

"Hyaaak!"

"You're not a cat. Why the hissing? Though you are cuter and prettier than any cat."

"Hyaak..."

Sophia, sunk. While she stammered and flailed, I clicked the notification.

"Ah."

"Ah."

"...Maybe don't flex quite so hard next time."

"But I was just so happy about your talent that I couldn't help it..."

"Well, can't blame you then."

Honestly, I would've flexed too. No — I would've trolled even harder. I'd been a menace in-game; of course I'd run wild on the forums too.

"I'll teach you how to flex without getting banned."

"Really? Wait — how do you know that well enough to teach me?"

"...Let's just check the post. You can still read tip threads without logging in, right?"

"Don't change the subject!"

I took control of Sophia's screen and pulled up the tip thread.

"We've already got a good minion, so let's start from number two."

"A good... minion...?"

"Maybe I should've gone to Dohoyo after all."

"Aaah! I'm sorry! Yohan is the best minion ever!"

She should've said that from the start. I tried to push the clinging Sophia off... and then those breasts of hers made me give up and allow it.

How do you reject a busty beautiful girl's affection? Any guy who could was either impotent or gay. Then again, Sophia was a goddess — she might perform the miracle of giving an impotent man a hard-on and turning a gay man straight.

So that was dwarves. There were explanations for other races too, but I skipped all of them and hunted down the human section.

"Sophia?"

"But! Yohan beat an elf! And Evrande was from a prestigious family, no less!"

"Then is this little guy a prestigious family member too?"

I picked up the egg that had been rolling around on the floor.

"Oh, right. How do we hatch this thing? Do we need an incubator?"

"Wasn't it in the tips?"

"No idea. Let's look it up together later."

"Alright."

Back to the tip thread.

"You hear that? I took on Yohan, who has a whole three talents!"

"Yeah, yeah."

"If a minion hates everything you throw at them, you'd dump them whether they're human or not, right? They sure wrote a lot of words for something that obvious."

"Right?"

I checked the human section under item three — Raising Your Minion — but it just said to keep doing whatever they were good at. Other races got detailed efficient routes spelled out step by step. Why were humans treated like this?

I got bored and skipped A Trainer's Mindset. Sophia could handle that herself.

"There's one part I actually agree with."

"Hm? What? Which part?"

"Trying a little bit of everything. Martial arts especially caught my eye."

"Really? But you don't have a martial arts talent. If you want one, I can get you a basic martial arts manual."

"I'd appreciate that, but I want to try something else first. I do have the Handicraft talent, right? That flex post earlier said people pay big money for handicraft dwarves."

"Aaah. Yeah, they did."

"Seems like a talent that helps with crafting. And crafting has a bunch of different fields, right? I want to test which one fits me."

"Leave that to me!"

Sophia opened an app called Hermes Mall.

"Isn't Hermes an Earth god?"

"Famous gods can spread their myths even to planets where newbies like me haven't been born yet. Lord Hermes only made it to the Division 2 league, but he runs a shopping mall and ended up way more famous than most Division 1 gods!"

So the gods from Greek and Roman mythology — and Norse mythology and the rest — all actually existed. Personally, I wanted to meet Thor.

Mostly because I wanted to show him the movies that aired on Earth. How would the real Thor react to seeing himself as a fat guy? Just imagining it was fun.

While I was off in fantasy land, Sophia was adding items to her cart: Beginner Blacksmith Set, Beginner Jewelry Set, Beginner Carpenter Set, Beginner Alchemy Set...

"Hold on. Why are you buying so many?"

"I may be too poor to buy minions, but I've got enough divinity to buy my Yohan some starter kits!"

"Oh."

"Truth is, I won some off Dohoyo from the practice battle. We ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠made a little bet on who'd win before either of us recruited a minion."

"Ahh. So if you'd lost, you'd be broke?"

"No! I would've been a little tight, sure, but I could've recovered in a few months!"

She'd bet several months' worth of divinity. I was starting to worry Sophia might have a gambling problem. No matter how pretty she was, a gambling-addict goddess was... well, her chest was huge, so maybe it was fine.

Everything always came back to the breasts, didn't it. Huge ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠tits really were the best.