Duel with Yesterday's Me
"Let's fight, yesterday's me."
I declared a duel to death against my reflection in the mirror.
I just couldn't forgive that lazy bastard who'd dumped everything on me.
Just because she's got that cute face, she thinks she can get away with it?
Thinking about all the crap I have to deal with now already gives me a headache.
Last night, the version of me who'd done jack squat and just sprawled out stared me down with a menacing glare, swinging her fists wildly.
Whoosh.
Whoosh.
"That's not a sound that comes from your mouth—!"
Screech.
"Gahhh! You sneaky little...!"
I overextended my arm and ended up losing.
Clutching my sprained arm, I forfeited due to injury and dragged myself out of the bathroom.
It was still early morning. Normally, I'd be rolling around under the electric blanket (no temperature control) scrolling the gallery, but not today.
Because right now, I'm in a very confusing state.
Something even more shocking than turning into a little girl overnight had happened.
Rustle.
Lee Jiwoo (Li Zhiyou)
030922 - 4■■■■■■
"...What the hell is this...?"
The last digit of my resident registration number had changed from 3 to 4.
The photo on my ID was now of some unfamiliar woman my apparent age.
What I'm saying is, even before turning into this girl, I'd apparently been a woman all along.
In other words, I hadn't turned into a girl—I'd just gotten a bit younger. Hair color changed too, but whatever, not important.
Anyway, I was extremely confused.
My whole life as a proper man had vanished with a snap.
If you're asking why, I'd tell you if I knew, but even I had no clue what caused it.
"ChatGPT, I suddenly turned into a girl. What do I do?"
Ding.
"What do you know, you tin can."
I'd even considered the possibility.
Maybe I'd actually been a woman all this time, but some mental issue made me delusionally think I was a man.
"Our resolve. We pledge our loyalty to the nation and its people... Yeah, I remember that. What the hell."
But no.
My memories of serving as a non-awakener private were crystal clear.
Even non-awakeners—adult males—got dragged into mandatory military service for national defense or whatever.
I considered maybe I'd volunteered as a female soldier, but no way.
Anyway, somehow my current identity was female.
I checked my original resident number on the government website—nothing.
The male Lee Jiwoo's number didn't exist, but the female one's pulled up fine.
"And all the clothes are women's too..."
I opened the rickety wooden wardrobe (doesn't close properly) and pulled out every piece of clothing.
A boxy tee with a cute bunny character.
Oversized pink tracksuit pants.
Black dolphin pants.
Jingle jangle.
"Eek, heeek."
...No matter how I looked, there were even panties that no man could wear.
Every single one oozed estrogen, totally unfit for manly Lee Jiwoo.
I held a pretty large-sized bra up to my chest, felt a wave of self-loathing, and set it down gently.
Why would girl Lee Jiwoo mid-size even matter to me?
I must've lost my mind for a sec.
"...But they're all so shabby anyway."
Looks like girl Lee Jiwoo hadn't lived much better off than me.
No designer labels anywhere.
The clothes all had that familiar flea-market vibe.
Well, the place was a rooftop shack to begin with.
Her ID photo looked decent enough—maybe personality issues?
"No, that's not the point right now."
The constant dings from notifications finally made me unlock my phone.
And there were messages from the convenience store manager.
This crazy manager.
When I was a guy, he'd nitpick over every discarded item, but to girl Lee Jiwoo, he's all sweet.
Thanks to that, I never got chewed out like an angry chihuahua.
Didn't get fired from the convenience store gig either.
Guess girl Lee Jiwoo had an easier time at work than guy me. But I can't work in this body.
Putting a kid behind the counter? Manager'd get arrested.
"...Wait. What if I try?"
I was tempted for a sec, but I haven't gotten this month's pay yet, so no dice.
Manager gets busted or not, if I don't get paid, I lose out.
At least get paid for what girl Lee Jiwoo worked, then quit. Whatever—I'm her now.
"First things first, get that paycheck."
Quitting the store job is set in stone anyway.
These sweet messages were getting awkward, so I decided to call.
Handle what I can now to avoid hassle later.
Ring... ring...
Ring... ring...
Click.
"H-Hello? Manager?"
"Hel-looo~ not 'honey' though~."
Damn, not easy.
Even though it was a familiar voice I'd heard for years, it triggered some visceral repulsion.
So girl Lee Jiwoo endured this every day at work?
Sorry for misunderstanding earlier.
You didn't have it easy either...
"I-I'm not feeling well. So, um..."
"Not feeling well? Did you go to the hospital?"
"I-I'm heading there later! Anyway, I don't think I can do shifts anymore starting today. Sorry, but could you deposit my pay for the work so far..."
"Aigoo, must be really bad. Got it, we'll talk slowly later~."
"N-No, I'm quitting for real, Manager."
"Okay, rest till tomorrow~. Oh, I sent something to your address, so eat that at least—"
"...If you don't pay me, I'll report you!"
Click. I clearly demanded my pay from the evasive manager and hung up.
Really regret no-showing yesterday without notice, but I couldn't take any more.
That voice was slathered in butter...
"But I said my piece without backing down—good job, me..."
Patting myself on the back, I booted up the computer and retreated to my mental sanctuary.
I'd braced myself from the sweet texts, but the voice hit harder than expected.
Still stuff to do, but mental recovery first.
Plus, look into yesterday's mess.
"Hmm."
Helji Gallery was in chaos, as expected.
Looks like the dungeon gate from yesterday stirred up a storm.
No dead hunters, so not huge news.
Most Helji folks are non-awakeners anyway—no way they know what went down.
No official announcement yet either.
Anyway, I protected my spiritual homeland once more.
If I hadn't stopped the gate shock, some gallery bros might've died.
Too harsh if they can't even thank me.
Logged into Helji with my main (not the S-rank fan alt), typing as my brain dictated.
Tap tap.
Walking down the street yesterday and boom gate opens. Hunters inside getting wrecked;;
Had to awaken as S-rank super beauty hunter, saved everyone, took out boss mob, stopped gate shock too. Seoul hunter bros, bow to me once a day from now on.
Awakened as S-rank hunter but can't decide breakfast. Help
"...Huh, that does sound legit. When I make bank, spam first."
Bantering with the usual anon crew lifted my mood a bit.
That's why Helji rules.
All kindred spirits—no awkwardness, no effort.
People belong in their homeland.
Exile brings suffering for a reason.
If they found out I'm a soon-to-be S-rank hunter with S-rank skills, I'd get banned from Helji.
But they never take me seriously, as always.
Lets me shitpost harder than anyone.
Get banned if they catch I'm awakened, but the thrill if I don't? Peak.
Play mafia while galling if I'm slick. "Heh heh."
Dungeon pics too precious to post now—save for later.
Only day 2 awakened.
Post 'em when I wanna stir real shit.
Can't fully gall now anyway.
"...She should be here soon."
Either way, yesterday was unprecedented for me.
Awakened S-rank skills outta nowhere, met hidden boss, retrieved dungeon core.
No point brooding solo.
Hunter Association consult? Too early to reveal.
New S-ranks shine best as surprise saviors in crises.
Plus, tangling with Association or gov too soon? Nah.
Ding dong.
"She's here."
So I called her over.
My one and only hunter acquaintance.
Better than me, a lifelong non-awakener.
She knew girl Lee Jiwoo too—huge relief.
If not, I'd be devastated.
Even if I'm sis not bro now... unavoidable.
Creeeak...
"C-Come in."
"...!"
Standing on tiptoes to open the door, guest Kim Arin immediately lowered her head.
Our eyes met as she looked up at me, and she asked in a slightly shocked voice.
"Sis... really Jiwoo sis?"
"Y-Yeah..."
"...Whoa."
That was it.
Kim Arin spent the next bit just staring, too busy observing to speak.
I was awkward with the "sis" title too, so silent.
But.
Grrrowl...
"Ah."
My stomach clock spoke up.
Kim Arin's eyes went wide, then narrowed slyly.
"...Sis."
"Yeah?"
"Skipped breakfast, huh."
Skipped? Haven't eaten yet.
Before I could argue, she whipped out her phone, shoved the delivery app in my face.
"Pick. Ordering now. Be here quick."
"N-No need... I got no money."
"Won't make you pay. For sis."
Her firm tone left no choice—I searched spam lunchbox, added to cart.
She tilted her head at the cart, but whatever.
I want spam.
Gonna be S-rank soon anyway.
"Spam...?"
"S-ranks eat spam, right? Or nah?"
"...Who said that?"