Chapter 52. When Do You Think the Crisis of Life Is? Now.
Chapter 52. When Do You Think the Crisis of Life Is? Now.
Song Hoon and Laila were darting around town, looking at potential homes.
Meanwhile, an online community post went up discussing the supposed "something" going on between Hero and the Saintess.
[ Author: Anonymous ]
[ Title : So, are those two officially dating or what? ]
[ Content : (A picture of them sitting together) Hm... I went to Japan... Hero looks totally drained and the Saintess has this fresh glow. This is just entirely... ]
↳ Hey hey hey!!!
↳ LOL was he just totally drained or what!!!
↳ Alright... time to pay up on that bet, no? lol
↳ Whoever said "no way they'd date" and promised to give away free burgers if they did, get out here unless you wanna die
But alongside posts celebrating it like a festival, other kinds of posts went up too.
[ Author: Anonymous ]
[ Title : Wait, they were dating behind our backs this whole damn time? ]
[ Content : When were you ever reeking of desperation for us, you fucking lol ]
↳ Reeking... of desperation?
↳ His username was literally Hero, and he showed up on day 3 of broadcasting, what were you even talking about lol
↳ What a moron lol
Naturally, such rabble-rousing posts were quickly deleted thanks to countless dislikes and the swift blade of the moderators.
[ Author: Anonymous ]
[ Title : (Pic of his unfocused eyes) But seriously, why does he look so wrecked? ]
[ Content : Saintess... you're gonna kill Hero!!! ]
↳ LOL
↳ He really did look like he got the life sucked right out of him
↳ So, was them dating official or not?
↳ It's not official-official, but them moving out to a place of their own all but confirms it, doesn't it?
As anyone could tell by looking at Laila's ring, since she didn't want to stir up dating rumors during the stream, she wore it around her neck in the form of a pendant.
---
Quite a bit of time had passed since Laila started touring homes with the real estate agent.
I never knew Seoul had this many apartments with so many bedrooms.
"This place also... has a lot of rooms."
The ceilings were decently high, the interior was spotless, and the living room was spacious.
The natural lighting was great too, but...
'Isn't this more than good enough?'
However, Laila wasn't satisfied and shook her head.
"Agent, are there any nightlife districts around here?"
"There's a major boulevard out front... so you won't be bothered by noise, right?"
"Hmm... and considering the school district for our children..."
With Laila firing off questions without giving him a moment to breathe, the young agent nodded vigorously, sweating profusely.
"Ah, yes... the management has been excellent recently, and all the residents are generally quiet, so... haha..."
I cast a slightly pitying glance at the agent.
I was so sorry...
I'll tack on a generous commission for your trouble...
"Laila, but do you really need this many rooms?"
At my words, Laila slowly turned her head and looked at me.
Her eyes curved slightly, and the corners of her mouth gradually lifted...
She quietly walked over right next to me.
"Hero... you lack imagination."
"?"
Laila came close enough that I could almost feel her presence against my ear.
She whispered carefully, as if breathing a warm sigh into it.
"After all... we don't know how many children we might have, do we?"
Along with those words, a teasing smile bloomed on her face. I inhaled a beat too late.
"...Ah."
"Ah, um...!"
The agent, who had been deep in thought, tapped the tablet he was holding and spoke up.
"If the purchase price is no object... a penthouse listing just came in. How about that?"
"Agent, the price doesn't matter. Is it okay if we go see it in person?"
"Yes, of course...!"
Swept along by Laila's mysterious pressure, we got into the agent's car and headed for the building. Even in the car, Laila took the agent's tablet and checked every detail meticulously.
"Hmm... a view of the Han River, a department store right next door... and cross the bridge and there's another department store?"
I quietly looked away, completely unable to say a single word.
The place we arrived at was the top floor of a luxury residence. The moment we stepped out of the elevator, a private corridor greeted us, and once we opened the door, a luxurious marble floor and a vast living room came into view.
"Wow... I've seen places like this on the internet, as the kind of homes celebrities live in..."
At my muttering, the agent confidently thumped his chest with his hand.
"Heh heh, a run-of-the-mill celebrity couldn't even dream of living in a place like this."
"But was a place like this actually vacant?"
I tilted my head in confusion.
Why would such a nice house sit empty?
"It wasn't vacant. A fairly well-known foreign investor bought it to stay in Korea, but his plans changed. So by a stroke of luck, it came on the market like this."
While I was chatting with the agent.
Laila had already crossed the living room and was out on the terrace.
She leaned on the railing and murmured in the sunlight.
"Here on this terrace... laughing together, happily, while grilling meat with Hero's children... hehe..."
"..."
Hearing Laila's words, I self-consciously averted my gaze.
"...Won't we get noise complaints if we grill meat here?"
"Ah, don't you worry about that. This house has a private ventilation system for the terrace. It's designed so smoke and smells don't leak outside at all."
"Wow..."
The agent explained a number of other convenient features.
Valet parking, a cleaning service company, security, and so on...
There was also a gym, swimming pool, tennis court, and you could even order cooked food via room service.
"What do you think, Hero? Wouldn't it be wonderful to live here?"
Without a word, I turned my head and looked toward the terrace.
Then looked back at Laila.
'Seeing that expression on her face... saying no would be the weird thing.'
---
Dinner time.
My mother and father came home from work, and we always ate together.
And before my parents came home, I had personally eaten (?) something else.
'Wait, no, maybe I was the one who got eaten...?'
"Son... you're drying up day by day..."
Since she now clearly knew the cause and effect...
Mother glanced at Laila, then looked back at me.
"..."
Still, it's love between lovers.
Thanks to Laila's thoroughness, we cleaned up perfectly.
After sharing our love, she did the cleaning, the laundry, and even the drying, restoring everything to their original state.
'If I move out with Laila, am I actually gonna wither away to death...?'
"Speaking of which, when are you moving out?"
"Maybe take it a little slow..."
"Huh?"
Knowing how strongly Laila had pushed for independence, my mother looked at me as if I'd said something weird.
"No, it's just... I'll probably miss home-cooked meals, and I haven't really talked with you, Mom, all that much..."
A pathetic excuse.
If I get dragged (?) off like this, Laila's really going to squeeze me dry all night long.
Even now, I could feel her sharp stare from right beside me.
— Slink...
"!?!!"
Under the table, Laila placed her hand on my thigh.
And then she put on the most innocent smile.
"Oh my, but Hero said he loved the house too~"
"I did..."
After polishing off our bowls, we went into my room. The moment we came in, Laila sat herself down astride my lap as I sat on the chair.
"Hero... do you not want to live with me...?"
She looped her arms around my neck and looked at me with glistening eyes as she spoke.
'Ah, this was a little unfair...'
"No, of course I want to live with you. You're my girlfriend."
"Hmm... Not 100 points. That's 80 points."
80 points?
I thought that was a killer line that deserved at least 90 points.
"At a time like that, you're supposed to say, 'You're my future wife.'"
"Ah, well..."
She sealed my lips as I tried to make some excuse.
With Laila's lips...
— Smooch... Mwah... Chu...
"Pwah... We have to stream... so let's stop here for today♥"
It's just how the male creature was built.
Even after being squeezed dry every single time, one cute little aegyo burst from my girlfriend and I was instantly back in form (?).
My mouth says no, but my body was honest.
[ World's Strongest Hero : Live On ]
[Did you check out houses?]
[Where are you headed?]
[The Hill? Niel? Pellis?]
I'd put up a notice saying I'd be turning the stream on late since I was out looking at places. Sure enough, the moment I started the broadcast, everyone was curious about which house we'd chosen.
"..."
[ Saintess's Foot-Wiper has donated 200,000 Watts! ]
- So where are you going, you rich son of a bitch is still just raking in the donations
Anyway, I was planning to shoot a newlywed house (?) vlog there regardless. When Laila smiled and told them the name, the viewers were predictably horrified.
[You went THERE?]
[S-rank isn't just a joke, huh...]
[Even earning 100 million won a year you'd have to work 700 years for that, what the fuck lol]
[ Resignation Letter Always in My Pocket has donated 10,000 Watts! ]
- So anyway, did you watch the Japan vlog video that was uploaded recently?
"Uh... no, I haven't seen it yet."
[Is this guy seriously a Nutuber?]
[He just completely handed off the post-production screening to some dog lol]
"If he wants to earn money, he'll do it himself properly."
I graze the sheep, but I didn’t abandon them.
That's my ironclad rule.
An excuse, you say?
So what.
[What an absolute madman...]
[You crazy bitch;;]
[But he did do a good job on his own, it's already got insane views lol]
"Ah, really?"
[ Saintess's Foot-Wiper has donated 10,000 Watts! ]
- Let's watch it together here, go go go go
[ Overflowing Holy-Power Pouch has donated 10,000 Watts! ]
- Go go, let's watch it together with Saintess
Not just donations, but the chats were overflowing with requests to watch it together.
I was worried there might be some weird or embarrassing part in it, but there wasn't anything like that.
It was just a normal trip, the kind a tourist who likes subculture would have, roaming around Japan.
"Fine."
I pulled up Nutube and clicked on the channel, where a 30-minute, generously packed video sat on the main screen. We watched the video, and I chatted with the viewers here and there.
[Wow, I've been to that tower too]
[Ah... that place is truly a holy land for weebs lol]
[Why does this bastard know all these characters suspiciously well...?]
Perhaps because it was an overseas trip destination so close to Korea, I found a lot of common ground with the viewers. The communication continued, things like "Is this place good?", "Did you like it?", and so on.
But from a certain point on, the chat and donations drastically dropped off.
It happened right from the part where Laila and I were entering the maid café.
[You idiot lol]
[He ain't goin' far off the rails]
[The problem is, Saintess also didn't know the look on this bastard's face back then lolol]
[She knows now though, so bottoms up~]
'Ah, these bastards... this was why...'
[ Saintess's Foot-Wiper has donated 10,000 Watts! ]
- When do you think a life crisis hits?
[If you said "right now," upvote lol]
[Go ahead]
[Super mega upvote lol]
"..."
Right then, the screen closed up on my face ogling the maids. At the time, I hadn't realized it, but looking at the video, I was wearing quite a slack-jawed expression that was truly a sight to behold.