Chapter 45. ...Alright, Come to Me.
Chapter 45. ...Alright, Come to Me.
The first time.......
Something feared because it is unknown, and all the more precious because it can never be regained.
Most people know what it's like when a wrong beginning ruins everything that follows.
"......Ymir."
So was the unease she saw in him now born of that same fear of a first time?
"Are you truly all right with this? Someone like me spending your first night with you......."
No, because this man's concern had never been for himself — it had always been for others.
He feared that his own unworthiness might harm his partner. That was the psychology behind his consideration.
Because he believed himself lacking, he devoted himself to those who possessed more, striving to secure a place where he belonged.......
"Did I... put a burden on him? It isn't as if I asked him to become my lover or anything."
Circumstances she had initially dismissed as irrelevant now demanded her attention regardless.
After all, she was the one who had unreasonably pressed him to be with her.
She was grateful simply that he had followed her this far — how could she possibly push him further with yet more unreasonable demands?
"No, I... I'm fine with it."
"Just 'fine' is a bit disappointing, though."
A soft laugh escaped her as she placed a hand on her own naked body — on her chest, specifically — and spoke.
"When we walked through the streets, you noticed too, didn't you? Every single person passing by stared at me."
"......."
"How did that make you feel?"
"...It was unpleasant. Knowing they only saw you in that way."
His tightly clenched fist, resting on his knee, began to tremble faintly.
She could tell just by looking: the words he spoke now were not spoken lightly.
"Yes. Because you have a heart that cares for me."
That sentiment made her happy, but, ironically, what followed was far from sympathizing with his mindset.
"But you can't force that kind of regard on everyone in the world, can you? Unless a man is a eunuch, the moment he sees me, he'll think it right away — whatever her personality might be, her body alone is absolutely spectacular."
This was not vanity.
She was a woman who had long since abandoned a woman's life. The lumps of fat that merely hindered her movements were nothing but unnecessary tumors.
The Grand Archmage felt no honor or glory in her very position, regarding it merely as a 'means' for her research.
Even if the anthropophobia brought about by this body of hers had led her onto the path of the Grand Archmage, she took no particular pride in that fact.
"How about you let yourself feel a little happier about it? The fact that you can do whatever you please with this body."
Yes. Precisely because this was the body that had tormented her so relentlessly.
In a situation like this, it surely had its uses.
If this body was endlessly alluring when it came to pleasing a man.
"......Am I truly allowed to seize such an opportunity?"
Even so, Dave maintained a resolute demeanor, refusing to succumb to temptation.
But Ymir could see it. How he kept his posture as low as possible, desperately trying to conceal what lay between his legs.
Yes. He was aroused after all. She found his effort to avoid showing an unsightly appearance admirable.
"Is it because I'm the Grand Archmage?"
But the factor suppressing his desire — to her, that mattered not at all.
Within this sealed room, where even the gaze of society did not exist, there would be nothing to obstruct what lay between them.
"Dave. Are you treating me so kindly... because I'm the Grand Archmage?"
"...No."
"That's right. Because you're someone who is kind to everyone."
And not everyone in the world was as kind as he was.
Some would see her purely as an object of lust. Others would see her as a target to subjugate.
In their malevolent touch, she would find no consideration for her. In the end, contrary to her own will, she could be reduced to their plaything.
The position she occupied was one where such an outcome could occur at any time, and no one would be surprised.
Having never formed a single proper human relationship, she would be forced to endure their malice to her face, unable to seek anyone's aid when such a time came.
"Because you're someone who is kind to everyone, you could embrace even a worthless woman like me."
Yes. Even if she placed no value on chastity, that did not mean just anyone would do.
After her research concluded and she found some peace of mind, she had thought of it from time to time.
If someone in this world were to assign value to her first time, then when the moment came to lose it, she wished for it to carry a good meaning in her life.
"That's not true."
Such a modest desire — she believed the man before her could make it real.
"You are not a worthless person, Ymir. Some may dislike you, but I, at least, will never think of you that way."
"......Truly?"
"After all, you are someone who repaid my trust."
Gradually, a gaze tinged with resolve turned toward him — eyes that were exceedingly earnest, braced for everything.
"You proved the results with the item I risked my life to retrieve. You made me — the one who went into mortal danger believing in you — feel a sense of pride."
Knowing his own inadequacy, he sought to assist those greater than himself and thereby raise his own worth.
If one considered only that concept, it was no different from the knights who swore fealty to their king.
"I don't dislike you for that. Rather, I feel gratitude toward you."
A person not hard to understand, no matter how much one kept others at a distance.
Even if she could not understand, she wanted to try to understand.
To know who he was. To know how warm his hands were.
"Thank you. For making what someone inadequate like me did meaningful."
More than that, she wanted to lay her body upon his and become one with him, if only for a moment.
"......The same goes for me."
Hoping that such feelings would travel through her hands and reach him.
Soon, Ymir began to wrap her arms around his body.
"If my chastity is to be assigned a value, then that value will be equal to the happiness I gain from the act I share with you in this moment."
Pressing the body she had always considered an obstacle against him without hesitation.
"Dave. How far can you go for that value?"
Still pressed close against him, Ymir whispered into his ear.
Dave moved his trembling hands as though hesitating, then soon embraced her body in turn and murmured softly.
"Anything within my power to give you......."
"...Yes. Then."
As the fullness in her chest gradually quickened, Ymir lifted her head and began to bring her lips to Dave's.
The moment their mucous membranes met — a kiss shared with another person for the very first time in her life.
It was nothing more than the act of pressing their bodies together, yet she felt her body flush with heat regardless.
As if she had experienced this before.
"...Mn."
That sense of familiarity even erased any reluctance she might have felt toward the acts that followed.
"Mmn, haah......."
A sticky mass of flesh pushed through her lips and entered.
When it began to writhe by his will and stir her insides, the heat flowing from their breath started to fill her mouth with searing warmth.
Saliva and saliva. The liquid born from their mingling secretions dripped through the gaps of their repeated kisses.
Still, neither of them stopped.
Not the one acting, nor the one receiving.
"Ha-ah, mn. Hoo."
Rather, they pressed their bodies closer still, seeking each other's warmth.
And simply grew intoxicated by that passion.
"Pu-haaah~"
An ecstatic breath escaped the moment their lips parted. Her face, which had until now maintained its composure, began to take on a blissful hue for the first time.
This was surely the first time in her life she had ever shown herself so undone.
"...You're good at kissing."
And yet her voice was utterly bashful.
So much so that the kiss just moments ago had left her far more overwhelmed than all her prior resolve could have prepared her for.
Going beyond lip against lip, thrusting a tongue inside and stirring its depths — was that not practically sex performed with the mouth?
"Have you done this sort of thing with a girlfriend too?"
"No, I don't particularly have anyone I'm seeing......."
"And the girl who brought you into the party?"
"......."
His face stiffened in an instant.
Yes. When she had first met him, Serika had certainly shown signs of being conscious of him.
Their relationship had probably developed into something like that without Berdia even knowing.
"...I think there's been a bit of a misunderstanding. It isn't as if I'm looking to make you my lover or anything."
But he could rest easy.
As it happened, what she felt for him was not something one could call love.
The possibility that it might someday develop in that direction did exist, but for now.......
Things that merely made her heart pound just from standing beside him, things that made her conscious of his every action — those alone were not enough to swear an oath to spend her life with another person.
"...Truly?"
"Yes. I simply thought that you, of all people, could bring my first time to a good end....... Aah!"
In that moment, Ymir let out a moan as a hand descended upon her. She realized that he had positioned himself before her, his hands now cupping both her breasts.
"That makes me a little angry."
And with considerably rough handling, at that.
"Are you... the sort of person who uses her body so carelessly, that you'd entrust your first time to someone who isn't even your lover?"
"...Fufu, I told you, didn't I?"
The thought that even his anger was, in the end, for her sake — it made Ymir laugh.
"The value of this first time... will be equal to the satisfaction I gain from the act with you."
If she was satisfied by this act, she would feel a clear sense of worth in her own body to that extent. If not, she would regard it no differently than she always had.
He surely knew which direction to aim for, if he truly cared for her.
"Ah, nn......."
The hands gripping her breasts gradually applied more force. As if kneading clay, the soft flesh changed shape again and again, and with it, goosebumps rose across her skin.
The effect soon reached the nipples perched at the tips of her breasts.
"Hngh!!"
Dave seized the erect nipples between his fingers and applied pressure.
With the sensation that had been spread across the whole now concentrated into a single point, she felt something surge up along her spine.
What was this? It was, at the very least, something she had never felt before in her life.
If she had to guess, it was a concept she had only ever encountered in theory.
'S-something is coming.'
As that sensation swelled, she felt her mind growing blank, and the moans spilling from her lips grew steadily rougher.
"Nn, haah....... Haaah......."
A strange sound.
A noise she never imagined she would produce escaping without her intent — unable to endure the shame gradually washing over her, she began to cover her mouth with the back of her hand.
"You don't need to do anything."
Dave's gentle voice reached her.
"Just feel it. That's more than enough."
Before she could answer, Dave brought his mouth to Ymir's nipple.
And then he took it into his mouth. The moment his lips closed around the nipple.
"Aaah...!"
A voice reflexively escaped despite the hand covering her mouth.
The mouth enclosing her nipple did not stop there. It sucked as if drinking in air, and repeatedly grazed the stiffened nub with his teeth to stimulate it.
His actions were utterly uninhibited. As were the hands that gripped and kneaded her remaining breast.
'Is this... what men have wanted to do with my chest all along?'
To ravage breasts that produced no milk so mercilessly.
Even as the obscene handling seemed liable to crush her spirit, she felt her body flush with ever greater heat instead.
'I-it's coming.'
Yes, it would be soon now.
The sensation she had felt from the moment he laid hands on her body grew steadily clearer, until at last it churned through her mind and scattered even the accumulated treasures of knowledge she had built over a lifetime.
-Squelch!
At that very moment, the finger that had abruptly entered her sex pressed against her inner walls, amplifying the swelling she had braced for and dyeing the inside of her head pure white.
As if struck by lightning, her entire body went rigid under an intense pleasure unlike anything she had ever felt.
"Ah, a-aaaaaah~♥"
A coquettish cry spilled from lips that could no longer withstand the pleasure.
Along with it, her sweat-drenched body slumped onto the bed. Gazing up at the ceiling through blurred vision, she struggled to steady her breath, which threatened to slip away entirely.
'It feels... strange.'
A sensation felt for the first time in her life.
She knew of it in theory, but experiencing it firsthand was new.
Yes. So this was what sexual acts were like — this hot, this intense, this utterly addictive.
And so, that was why so many people yearned for relations with the opposite sex, she thought.......
'Something about it... felt good, so.......'
In the very moment she thought of wanting to experience what came next, unable to forget that pleasure.
"Your sensitivity is quite high. You're already sufficiently wet."
Immediately after, Dave spread both her collapsed legs apart and positioned himself to aim something between them.
"Is it all right?"
An object ill-suited to his composed face.
Into the depths of a maiden who knew not yet a man.
"...Yes, come ♥"
And toward her innermost depths, already prepared to receive him.