Regression (2): A Belated Apology
Today was the day of the Hero Department entrance exam at Yoram Academy. And right now, I was a pathetic failure who'd been eliminated. My right leg had gotten broken during the practical test, too.
Well, it was one of the top academies in the country. Even if I somehow passed the written exam, it was only natural for a half-baked nobody without even basic Authority to get weeded out in the practical. But back then, I couldn't accept that obvious reality at all.
The reason was simple. My head was stuffed full of inferiority complex and self-loathing.
This world was so harsh. Heroes of justice who stood against villains were like a single ray of saving light. In other words, they were the jobs everyone admired and envied.
And my childhood friend, whom I'd grown up with since we were kids, had become one of them. Receiving praise as one of the most talented in history, no less.
At first, I'd congratulated Yuha with pure sincerity. I'd even poured endless effort into trying to stand by her side.
But harsh reality's wall soon crushed me with defeat. All I had was the label of an orphan that stuck to me no matter where I went. And crucially, my affinity for Authority was abysmal.
As frustrations piled up, I naturally drifted away from Yuha. To be precise, I'd unilaterally pushed her away.
And today was the decisive day we'd completely fallen out.
Failing the Hero Department entrance and embarrassing myself by breaking my leg had made me lash out even more. I'd spewed vitriol at Yuha, who'd come to visit out of worry.
After that, I'd refused all visits and checked out. Then cut off all contact, vanished, and wandered the rock bottom of life in endless late regrets and laments.
Until I got unluckily caught by the villain Marionette, got brainwashed, became her puppet, and lived a half-death existence... until it all ended like that.
Anyway, it was the life story of something not even worth recycling—a total piece of trash.
"I-is that so..."
Yuha rolled her eyes in circles. Even in this moment, trying to find words of comfort was the epitome of a model hero.
"I-it's okay...!" She clenched her fists like it was her own problem. "There's next time...! Th-this time, I'll help you. Then surely...!"
"I'm just going to the regular department."
"Wh-what...?"
Yuha's eyes went wide as saucers, unable to continue. Like she'd heard something utterly unexpected.
It was inevitable. She'd been the one closest, witnessing my obsession and inferiority all those years.
"Just. I think graduating quick and getting a job sounds fine."
But I continued calmly.
"Can't waste time forever, right?"
"Huh? B-but..."
"Sorry, Yuha."
"Wh-what...?"
Silence settled over the hospital room.
Yuha stared at me with her mouth slightly agape. She gave an awkward smile and fumbled to speak.
"U-ugh. Hate it. Why're you suddenly being so gross? Sorry for what..."
"Sorry."
"Wh-what?"
"Sorry. For everything."
For taking out my pathetic inferiority on you. For brutally trampling and ignoring your heart that always thought of me. And... for getting you killed.
"Sorry. Really, really sorry..."
My rambling apologies poured out in a daze. All words I should have said five years ago.
Just apologies. What was so hard about this?
Pathetic bastard.
"..."
Yuha's pale green eyes stared blankly at me. Her hands, neatly folded on her lap, trembled more and more.
She bit and released her innocent lips over and over.
"I-I thought you hated me..."
Finally, tears welled up in her eyes.
"Hic. Don't know, hate you. Idiot. Kim Woojin, you idiot. I really hate you. Hiii..."
"Sorry. It was all my fault..."
"Hug me."
"Huh?"
"Sniff. If you're that sorry... hug me once."
Yuha, sniffling with her red nose, suddenly spread her arms wide. Like a sulky child throwing a tantrum.
It was a side of her I'd never seen.
...Yeah. Of course her heart must have been in turmoil all this time. Honestly, for a hero, Yuha's heart was still too soft.
I had no words, even if I had ten mouths.
But...
"Hey. What kinda gross hug between friends..."
"I said hug me."
A cold voice rang in my brain like a hammer.
Another side of Yuha I'd never seen.
And I had no way to refuse.
Right now, I was just a sinner with no right.
"...Sure."
"Heehee."
"How long you gonna stay like this? It's been over ten minutes already."
Yuha was clinging to me like a cicada.
Even then, she'd carefully avoided my injured leg—proof of her tenderness.
"I've been suffering for months, no, years, and you complain about ten minutes..."
Still with tear stains, she looked up and shot back poutily.
I could only sheepishly apologize.
"Sorry..."
"Fine. Good me will let it slide. And stroke my hair too."
"Hey. What'd you eat today to be like this..."
"I'vebeen sufferingformonths noy earsandyoujust..."
"Sigh..."
Only after a full hour did she finally peel off, satisfied. With relentless demands to stroke her hair in between.
I had no choice but to obey Yuha.
Probably her way of punishing me.
After so long as childhood friends, we'd seen everything there was to see. She knew better than anyone how we'd cringe at even touching.
Of course, compared to what I'd done to her, even that was a feather-light punishment.
"You really gonna go...?"
At the hospital room door, Yuha turned worriedly, asking over and over.
"You sure you're okay alone? Still, wouldn't it be better if someone..."
"You think I'm a kid? I don't need it—go already."
"Tch..."
Yuha pouted and grumbled. Meanwhile, the emergency pager on her waist buzzed wildly.
...Yep, she'd snuck out during work.
"...Come back after work."
"Huh? Really? I can come again?!"
"Do whatever. You'd come even if I said no."
"Heehee, true... But you said it yourself? Men don't go back on their word, right? If you change your mind..."
"Just go already."
Only then did Yuha grin and leave the room, reassured. Waving wildly until she vanished down the hall, asserting her presence.
I could lower my waving hand only after she was completely gone.
"...She's still such a kid. How's that a hero... sigh..."
The smile that had briefly touched my lips vanished soon after.
The room, empty of one person, was oppressively quiet.
I froze.
The TV droned on with gloomy news.
And Yuha's severed head sat atop it, smiling at me.
"..."
I blinked. The head was gone, as if it had never been.
"...Damn."
I sighed and finally leaned back.
After the brief commotion faded, the worries I'd shelved came crashing back like a tidal wave.
How didn't matter. I just pondered the meaning of returning.
Coincidentally, today was exactly five years before the world's end.
Right before my life's worst mistake.
And I'd corrected the biggest one. Unlike before, I'd apologized to her, even if late.
Of course, that alone wasn't enough to relax.
I'd told Yuha I'd give up hero dreams and go to the regular department—a lie only to reassure her, though not entirely false.
The current Hero Management Bureau regime was on the brink of collapse. It looked precariously stable now, but conspiracies and breakdowns accelerated beneath the surface.
Villains had already infiltrated deep into society, lurking.
The Bureau and even Yoram Academy, which trained next-gen heroes, had their clutches.
And unfortunately, by the time I realized, it was all over.
I'd just witnessed the world's end.
No way I'd close my eyes and ears, enjoy short peace, and meet the same fate.
"But..."
Frustration only grew.
Knowing and solving were different. I had no sharp solutions now.
This world was too vast and complex for one powerless individual to change.
"...Wait."
Then, a forgotten thought flashed.
This was exactly five years before the end.
Meaning...
"...The 'worst year' hasn't happened yet."
The worst year was the decisive defeat that scarred the heroes deeply.
Field training raid, academy raid, saintess kidnapping murder, villain prison bombing, and more.
In just one year, massive incidents shook society one after another.
The Hero Management Bureau failed to handle even one properly, exposing incompetence to the world.
And using that as a springboard, villains finally toppled the order.
...So conversely, if I could prevent the next year's events.
Root out the heroes' rot and clip the villains' wings.
Maybe I could erase that horrific end I'd seen.
"If I kill or capture the 'great evils' in advance...!"
Moreover, now the great evils—the culprits of the apocalypse—hadn't risen yet.
They'd unite after the worst year. Before, they acted solo or unknown.
It's possible. If I execute it, I can change the future.
But... how?
"..."
I hit another massive wall.
Resolve doesn't change reality.
I was still powerless. No Authority at all.
Not just great evils—even an F-rank villain would shred me instantly. A frail weakling lucky not to die.
Achieving that with this talent... pure fantasy.
"Damn. How the hell do I... Huh?"
-Bzzz, bzzz...
A harsh vibration snapped my focus.
The smartphone on the table lit up in garish colors out of nowhere.
"Broken...? Well, it's old..."
I grumbled lightly and picked it up thoughtlessly.
But soon, something utterly unexpected on the screen made me freeze.
"This is...?"