Chapter 37
Chapter 37
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 37
Chapter Title: Failure-7
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"Are you awake?"
As I stirred awake from sleep, the Saintess's face came into view.
Her spell had clearly worked. Because I'd probably never give up again.
No matter what it takes, I'll go back. I won't give up again. I'll escape this world and return to the one where I truly belong.
But to do that, I had to settle the things I'd been putting off.
The tasks I'd shoved aside, telling myself I'd leave this world anyway. The emotions I'd buried deep. I had to sort them all out.
"Yeah."
With that short reply, I swung my fist at the Saintess.
She showed no will to dodge, and she probably couldn't have reacted anyway. She crumpled to the ground from a single punch.
I'll be happy. I'll strive for that.
But there was no way I could simply erase the grudges I'd built up with them.
"Kyaaah!"
I didn't even give her a chance to defend with her holy power. It was far too much impact for her small body to endure.
Her organs might be damaged. I approached her fallen form slowly and pressed down gently on her heart with my foot.
"Isn't this what you wanted? You're the one who clung to someone who wanted to leave."
I have to survive. So much had happened, but it was no longer easy to brush off revenge as a 'pointless act.'
If I end up living in this world, I'll have no choice but to hear tales of the Hero's party and praise for them everywhere.
Unless I finish my revenge, every time I hear those stories, this rage will consume me again.
"...You're right."
Yet the Saintess smiled broadly, as if she'd won—as if she'd succeeded.
"You look... relieved. If it's like this, I think... I can live on..."
She wasn't talking about herself. The one she was gazing at was me.
I shifted my weight onto the foot planted on her chest, pressing down hard enough to crush her heart. Her breathing quickly grew ragged.
"No more words? If you stay like that, you really might die."
"The one who must die... dies. The one who deserves happiness... finds it. Of course... that's how it should be..."
I lifted my foot from her heart and smacked her fallen face.
"Ugh... kyat... mmph... kuh..."
Blood seeped from the Saintess's mouth. Her eyes swelled with bruises, red welts marking her skin everywhere.
"Feeling... ugh... a bit... better?"
"Who knows. Maybe a little better than before."
The more I struck her, the quieter her screams became.
Her holy power flickered faintly. Her body began to heal, little by little.
"No need for healing."
My fist slammed into her stomach, the impact shaking her body and undoing all the healing she'd just managed.
"It just makes it hurt more."
"Ah... I did it on purpose... thought seeing me in pain... would help you more..."
I didn't like her opening her mouth anymore. I smashed her lips properly, and she could only gurgle, unable to form words.
"If you were going to apologize, you should've done it sooner."
If she'd only said something like this after the Demon King was defeated, things never would've reached this point.
"I'm... an idiot... I didn't know."
I hated that look in her eyes, like she understood everything. I struck her eyes, drawing a scream of agony.
"But if me getting hit... makes you feel better... hit me as much as you want... please, just be happy."
Is that all? After all that preparation, the result of a spell forged from such immense emotions?
Of course, magic targeting emotions is terribly inefficient. Even a simple spell like 'stop' or 'forgive me' wouldn't have lasted more than a few seconds.
But if she'd cast a spell to halt me back then. Instead of something vague and convoluted like 'live happily,' if she'd used 'give up,' I wouldn't have been able to do a thing.
"I... can endure it. I won't resent you... won't get angry. Hit me... until your rage fades..."
Should I kill her here?
But that would just make it easy for her. If she'd feared death, she never would've stayed by my side to begin with.
Her reaction made it clear she'd anticipated this.
Legs, feet, stomach, shoulders, arms, face. I beat her relentlessly, without mercy or pause. Yet she didn't lose consciousness.
A soft, holy glow kept healing her nonstop.
"Then... I pray you find happiness..."
She finally closed her eyes. One more strike—just one more—and she might die. I stared blankly at her fallen face.
Her silver hair, as she lay asleep, was stained red with blood.
I gazed at the sight, dazed.
"You'll need Celia. Still going to kill her?"
"Shouldn't I?"
She's dangerous.
The Saintess won't interfere with my plans even if she survives. Her holy power is a threat, but that's all.
Taking her personality and status into account, she wouldn't rally an entire organization to hunt me down. Besides, she's suffering.
Letting her live could even be part of the revenge.
But the mage? Who knows what she'll do. I still couldn't even guess what spells she could cast or what abilities she possessed.
She's submitting now, but her mind could change at any moment.
Decision made, I lunged at the mage like a bolt of lightning.
Her body was even smaller than the Saintess's. Even without the Hero's power, she'd been pummeled by me countless times already.
No strength left to endure.
"Kuhk... I..."
"What? More to say?"
"I can't regenerate my body as skillfully as that woman, so handle me too roughly and I'll shatter in moments."
It wasn't a normal voice from her throat.
Sound emerged from her mouth, but it was magic. Her body was too wrecked to even open her lips.
"Doesn't matter."
"So it ends like this."
The holy sword wasn't in my hand. Probably dropped somewhere nearby, but I had no intention of releasing her to fetch it.
Who knows how she'd slip away.
How do you kill someone barehanded again?
I'd seen Elenor snap necks a few times, but I lacked confidence in pulling it off neatly.
And she'd bled far too much already. Snapping her neck might send blood spurting from torn flesh. I didn't like that image.
No need to dwell. I swung my fist in earnest, intent on killing her.
Fragile flesh tore. The goal wasn't pain—it was death.
Human skin is tougher than it looks; mercifully, my fist didn't rip it easily. But I was certain her organs were pulverized.
Only deflating groans escaped her mouth, yet the magic kept addressing me relentlessly.
"I don't know what I should do. You've made me doubt my own intellect. But I can still reference more exemplary cases."
"What are you planning now..."
"I can help. Didn't you want to go back?"
I halted my fist for a moment.
In the end, magic was essential to return. Pashier was the greatest mage I knew.
But trust in her was the problem.
She'd already failed once. No guarantee she wouldn't fail again for the same reason.
Failure I could accept. She'd obeyed my commands out of fear of this Hero's power. Given time, she could easily find a way to overcome it.
"This body, the Magic Tower—do whatever you like. But... it won't bring you happiness."
"How can I trust you?"
The desire to live again had taken root. But I couldn't grasp how to find happiness once more.
Forgiving them was easy. Enduring was simpler still.
But if enduring, understanding, and forgiving led to this horrific outcome...
Maybe killing her here was the right call.
"You've... probably already killed someone. I didn't hold back."
Even a blunt blade becomes a devastating club with this power.
I might have slain my own guards with these hands.
Too late to turn back.
"That's not true. I can guarantee no one died."
"How would you know!"
"Because I saw Celia casting healing spells while you were out."
I glanced back at the fallen Saintess. Her healing could indeed revive someone on the verge of death.
"Kill me now, and I'll be the first you've slain. Even so, I won't deny your choice."
My thirst for revenge hadn't dimmed in the slightest. If anything, it burned fiercer.
But if killing her meant destroying the final thread to return home without more bloodshed...
Fist raised high, I couldn't bring it down. Just like with the Saintess, a wretched hope buried deep in my heart was cursing me.
"If you must kill someone, kill me over Celia. We'll lack materials regardless, and you'll need immense holy power to compensate. If she has the emotion left to cast that spell once more, she'll prove useful."
It's absurd. I want to return precisely to avoid the Hero's party, yet doing so requires sparing them.
I staggered to my feet. I didn't want to look at Pashier's face again.
Stepping over the disrupted magic circle, I climbed toward the stairs.
I've been forced to tread this land once more.