Talion Has Evolved
'What the hell are you doing?'
I stared at the saintess's carriage with a baffled expression. The carriage must have been well-insulated for sound, as only faint noises leaked out, but they were unmistakably the moans of a woman lost in pleasure. I could guess what the saintess was up to, and truthfully, I was a bit shocked by this unexpected side of her. The woman who'd been an iron wall when it came to that sort of thing was now masturbating inside a carriage pulled by knights in broad daylight.
How should I mess with her for this? Having spotted a perfect chance to give the saintess a real taste of her own medicine, I racked my brain for the best way to do it.
"H-Hero. What are you doing here?"
But before I could come up with anything, an interloper showed up. Naturally, it was Jena von Darius. Fortunately, she was putting on her normal act in front of the others. If you're wondering why that's fortunate, just imagine it: your perfectly fine daughter suddenly one day neighing like a horse and begging someone for cock. Think about how her father, Duke Capella von Darius, would react. As I'd said before, I wasn't exactly scared of him, but it would be awkward as hell in all sorts of ways.
"Why?"
"J-Just asking. You suddenly came over to the carriage like this."
Jena answered with her face flushing red. But as you know, there's no such thing as "just" in this world. Watching her sneak glances at the carriage while keeping an eye on me, I could guess the reason. The anxious look of someone worried her master might take an interest in another horse. Honestly, Jena's jealousy struck me as just a tiny bit cute.
Sigh, Jena, if only you'd been like this back then. I gave a wry smile, recalling Jena from my first timeline—the one with zero self-awareness. In any case, there was no reason yet to let her know I had any interest in the saintess. Sure, if pressed, I could say it, but Crown Prince Aaron had once told me there was nothing more annoying than a woman's jealousy. And as you'd expect, I hated anything annoying with a passion. Who likes that shit, anyway?
"Ah, the horse isn't listening to me."
"Huh? J-Jena listens to the hero just fine..."
Jena reflexively started to respond, then jolted in shock and clapped a hand over her own mouth. She glanced around to make sure no one had heard, looking utterly ridiculous.
"Not you. This one."
"..."
Her face turned beet red at my words. She'd jumped to conclusions and blabbered nonsense all on her own, so of course she was embarrassed—but I pretended not to notice and pointed at her horse, Talion, with a finger.
"N-No way. Talion's always been a good listener to his master."
"No idea why this guy's suddenly acting up."
I looked at Jena and deliberately grabbed a fistful of Talion's golden mane. Her gaze shifted to it, and I could see her cheeks slowly flushing. Twitch, twitch. Her lower body was grinding against the horse's flank over and over, but I ignored her. Something else had caught my eye right then.
As I gripped the mane, Talion tossed his head defiantly with a snort. And amid the violent shake of his head, I spotted a very small horn sprouting from it.
"What the hell is this?"
A horn on a horse's head? It was straight-up unbelievable.
"Saintess, come out here a sec!"
"W-Why?"
I knocked on the window of the saintess's carriage, and soon her flustered voice came from inside.
"Problem cropped up. Come out. And Jena, take a quick break here."
Jena looked confused by my actions, but she nodded and spurred her horse to the front of the procession. Moments later, the holy knights and carriages halted, and the saintess and Jena approached me. Both had flushed cheeks for different reasons, but right now, that didn't matter. What mattered was Talion. Even I, who'd lived through the first timeline, had never heard of a horned horse.
As far as I knew, Jena had ridden Talion everywhere until she fled the battlefield, and given her personality, she wouldn't have hidden a horn like that.
She probably would've bragged about her amazing horned horse to high heaven.
So this was something that hadn't happened in my previous life—an unexpected variable for me.
"This looks like a unicorn, doesn't it?"
"...A unicorn?"
"N-No way? I've raised Talion since he was a foal. He never showed any difference from other horses..."
"But now that a horn's sprouted, he's clearly not a normal horse, right?"
Talion snorted lightly as the humans surrounded him, chattering away. One was the human who'd raised him since he was young, another was the beast-like human who'd shot killing intent at him, and the last was the blue-haired human with a pleasant scent. It was strange, but Talion could understand their words perfectly.
Hmph, what's so weird about that? I evolved last night—it's only natural I'd change.
Of course, Talion could think like a human now, even in human language. Sadly, his mouth wasn't built for it, so he couldn't speak. He hadn't always been able to do this, though. Up until last night, he'd just been a slightly clever horse, not much different from the rest.
But as Talion recalled, last night—he'd completed his evolution into a unicorn.
Unicorns don't multiply through breeding like humans think.
Talion didn't know this himself, but unicorns didn't increase their numbers through reproduction. Makes sense, right? They only liked human virgins, so breeding with their own kind was impossible. It wasn't entirely impossible for them to hook up with human women, but pregnancy? No dice.
So how were unicorns born? Simple: have the same experience as Talion. Grow up under the hand of a virgin female owner from a very young age, develop strong affection for her beyond a certain point... and then witness her losing her virginity to another man right in front of you. In short, getting NTR'd by your virgin master was the birth condition for a unicorn.
That's why the unicorn horn wasn't really a horn. There was a rumor it was actually the manifestation of resentment—the second dick formed from the agony of "Why can't I have that human woman?" But that hadn't been confirmed yet.
Whatever. I'm that legendary divine beast, a unicorn!
Talion haughtily lifted his chin, looking down imperiously at the humans gawking at him. His arrogant gaze fixed on Jena and the killing-intent-spewing human male.
"Talion, come here."
The moment Jena reached out, Talion deftly dodged her hand. His former master stared in shock, but he felt no guilt. Compared to the trauma he'd suffered last night, her shock was nothing.
No, this impure ex-master who'd lost her virginity had no right to touch his body anymore.
Dodging her hand, Talion naturally sidled up to Saintess Marian instead. She had a faint impure scent mixed in, but the thick aroma of virginity he craved wafted from her. In fact, that's why he'd ignored the hero earlier and headed for the carriage.
"Hiiing. Hiihi-hiiing! (Human, live with me.)"
Talion rubbed his face against Marian's chest, trying to say that. Or rather, he meant to. But the attempt failed when, just before his face made contact, someone yanked his mane hard.
"Where do you think you're going, you beast?!"
"Hiiing! Hii-hiiing! (Don't ignore me! I'm a unicorn!)"
Talion reared up aggressively on his front hooves, but all he got in return was a stinging slap across the face.
It took him a moment to realize the brutish hero human had dared to smack his cheek.
"Hiiing! (You wanna die, human?!)"
"Fuck off!"
But when he saw the hero's hand rising again, Talion immediately averted his gaze like nothing had happened. It was pure instinct, not reason. Thinking it over, being a unicorn didn't change much. He could think like a human and smell virgins—that was it. Unlike pegasi, who could fly, unicorns were on a whole different, lesser level.
To survive, you had to swallow your pride when necessary. That was life—or horse life. Talion suddenly resented the god who'd given him the ability to think. If he'd been a dumb horse like the others, he wouldn't feel this wronged or furious.
"Hiiing! (This is so unfair!)"
"Shut up, you damn horse!"
Talion clamped his mouth shut at the hero's words, but for some reason, his former master was twisting her legs together with a flushed face.