Elijah's Birthday (1)

Elijah had declared that on her birthday, she herself could feed the Moon Deer the yellow parasol mushroom. But she had no intention of letting me go. It was my fault and my sin for answering "Understood" without even hearing her full command of "Don't go." I'd admit to that. Still, I couldn't help but ask the reason.

"Why...?"

To my dazed question, Elijah replied brazenly.

"Because it's dirty."

"Pardon?"

"If I feed it myself, my hands will get dirty."

That much was true. The Moon Deer didn't eat the mushroom politely. It chomped away, spitting out saliva-soaked crumbs, and its tongue might even touch you. I wasn't sensitive to such things. Just wash up with water afterward. But to Elijah, it was an entirely different matter. Not a single drop of water could easily touch her—she was a great noble, after all.

"......"

I understood, but the answer was too shameless. In the end, she just didn't want her own hands dirty, so she'd use mine. That was the story. I'd known it, but the audacity of nobles was enough to make the listener doubt their own ears. My mouth had already replied "Understood." I couldn't say no.

"Then, until when must I stay?"

"What, do you want to leave here?"

The question struck right at the heart. It was a casual query, not probing my true intentions. Yet Elijah's red eyes seemed to pierce through everything. Eyes that stayed calm and composed in any situation. Eyes that smiled sweetly only when killing. Pretending to be calm, I said,

"Not at all. It's just that the longer I stay here, the more of a burden it becomes. Above all, it might interfere with training."

"No need to worry. Once I'm certain it serves me completely, I'll let you go."

"...Understood."

Elijah stepped down ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠from the dais and approached the Moon Deer head-on.

"When will you feel like serving me?"

She stood beside me, so I took a step back. Elijah reached for the Moon Deer's nape, just as I had. The Moon Deer cautiously backed away. It still hadn't fully accepted her. Watching the retreating beast, Elijah let out a smirk. It somehow looked bitter.

While Lia wiped her hands, Elijah said,

"I should head back now. I'll come again next time. ...Oh, right. I heard you have a gift left for me. I forgot because I was busy."

I startled. How did she know? The cookies I'd bought back then. I still hadn't given them. They felt too embarrassing to call a "gift." Elijah hadn't asked, so I'd assumed she didn't know.

"What if it was a lie?"

"Ah, no, um...."

This situation was mortifying. On the bright side, I was glad I hadn't eaten them. I'd even debated tossing them as a gift to avoid misunderstanding and just devouring them myself. Fumbling, I pulled a small pouch from my pocket and handed it over. The pouch I'd carried every time I met her, agonizing over whether to give it. The cute patterned paper suited her age well.

"C-cookies...."

"Cookies?"

It was modest enough for her small hands.

"Can I open it here?"

"Y-yes...."

Mortified and dying of shame. Why did I even buy these...? They'll seem so cheap and tacky to Elijah....

Elijah eyed me curiously before tearing open the wrapping. Three tiny cookie pieces emerged. Small enough to barely whet the appetite in one bite.

Thirty florins for three pathetic little cookies like that....

Elijah smirked.

"Cute."

Trivial. Tacky. The word carried layers of meaning. Such meager cookies. To her, they probably weren't even worth a penny. Anna had said she accepted flowers—would she take these too? If she tossed them saying "What's this?", I couldn't complain.

"You liked the cookies I gave you last time?"

"Pardon? Ah, yes. Of course."

"Good. Thanks for the gift. I'll enjoy them."

"...An honor."

Elijah left. Bradley went to clean other stables, leaving just me and the Moon Deer in the stall.

"Hoo...."

I leaned against the Moon Deer's sprawled body on the floor. Strength drained from me. I'd thought I could leave here, but no. Elijah's noble mindset was beyond someone like me.

Still, it won't be forever. Just endure a bit longer.

The Moon Deer, in good spirits, snorted softly and rubbed its antlers against me. Adorably mismatched with its size.

"Yeah, yeah."

I stroked the hard antlers. A cool energy seeped into my body along them. I'd felt something similar the first time I touched them. I'd vaguely sensed it then, but now it was clearer. This was mana the Moon Deer was giving me. Since that first day, it had been injecting mana into me bit by bit. Thanks to that, I'd been able to liberate mana against Gulliet.

"Good boy."

I scratched its nape like a pet, then placed my hand on the antler again. I focused on the sensation flowing into me. Beneath the skin. Something coursing through my veins. Cool but not chilling, not threatening. My mind cleared. A blocked path opened smoothly. The fatigue from fighting Gulliet today washed away.

"Hoo...."

Breathing slowly, I concentrated more. No thoughts arose. An empty, dark consciousness. Fragmented memories surfaced.

'Jae-won, I know you're good at it. I know, I do. Hoo.... Let's get past this once, yeah?'

'Director. No matter how I think about it, this is...'

'That's why you shouldn't have stepped up, yeah?! If you'd stayed quiet back then, the police wouldn't have...! Haa. Jae-won. Endure just this once. Next time, I'll definitely get you to the Olympics. The association president said just this once. Yeah?'

'......'

'See? That's what you get for being good. Or you should've been born better.'

......

"...Sir. Judas sir?"

"...Huh?!"

I flailed awake at the voice.

"You didn't come back late, so I came looking."

"Ah...."

It was Anna. Wiping drool from my mouth, I recalled. I fell asleep touching the Moon Deer's antler. Busy since morning—fatigue must've built up.

...Damn, I woke up looking so sloppy.

Why so many embarrassing moments today? Pretending nonchalance, I said,

"Sorry. I dozed off."

"I heard you barely won the finals today. Must be exhausted. Go rest in your room."

Before leaving, I checked the Moon Deer. It too had its chin on the floor, sleeping soundly. Mana doesn't come ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠from thin air. It had been giving me bits of its own each time. Afterward, it always slept like this. Must tire it out too. I stroked the dutiful Moon Deer's head, then followed Anna.

Elijah underwent a checkup from May, her personal physician and the mansion's doctor. May's conclusion was simple and obvious.

"You need rest."

Dizziness from overwork. What she needed wasn't medicine or a doctor, but rest and sleep. A pointless diagnosis. May and Elijah both knew she couldn't rest. Nightmares prevented deep sleep anyway.

"Got it."

Spitting out words she wouldn't keep, Elijah headed straight to her office. She tried one of the cookies from Judas. Small. Taste: so-so. Not bad. She'd learned people tend to gift what they like themselves.

"Lia."

"Yes, miss."

"Tell Anna to bring cookies to Judas every morning starting tomorrow. Mix the ones from before with new ones."

"Understood."

In the office, two anemones greeted her. Now wilted with time. It felt oddly regrettable.

Still the weekend. Gawain came to see me. To check my mana use.

"Show me."

He took me to the indoor training hall.

"Yes, sir."

The mana I'd used against Gulliet. Only a day had passed. I'd felt drained, but thanks to the Moon Deer, my energy was back. I focused my mind. Like when fighting Gulliet. Mana. Mana....

"It's not working?"

Of course it wouldn't just because he said so. I didn't even know how I'd done it then. Not by my will. Pure coincidence.

"......"

I clenched my fist hard enough to tremble, thinking maybe brute force—but nothing. Gawain looked down at me with complicated eyes. Almost pitiful?

"Stop. Recall the emotions from then."

"Emotions?"

"Yes. How you felt fighting Gulliet. What you thought."

Emotions then. Thoughts. Nothing special. Annoyed by his constant provocations, hurting from the beatdown, desperate to win. Craving just one solid hit. But recalling after the fact couldn't recapture that intensity. Naturally, no mana liberation.

"...No."

"I suspected as much."

Gawain nodded knowingly.

"How much do you know about mana?"

Only game stats. Not what he meant.

"...Nothing."

"Everyone has mana in their body."

Gawain began explaining.

"The amount is minuscule, and using it is difficult, but it's fact. Using it grants superhuman strength or special phenomena. But as I said, not easy."

He paused, checking if I listened. I nodded.

"Usually, consistent training teaches control. But you seem to have experienced an atypical case."

"Atypical?"

"Yes. When facing life-threatening danger or desperately desiring a goal worth risking death. Untaught mana activates."

Exactly. I'd hated losing to Gulliet, even if it killed me. Wanted to win.

"No extra training needed, yields more power than normal methods. But since circuits opened unprepared, willful control is fatally hard."

Mana liberation started by emotional outburst. Imprinted on my circuits that way.

"Trainable, but will take longer for you."

"How long?"

"Varies. No need to despair. Can't be a full knight without mana, and even trained ones sometimes can't."

"Presumptuous, but may I join the camp's mana training?"

"No."

Gawain shook his head immediately.

"Only for 6th exam passers."

Strict principled man. Knowing his nature, I accepted. My request was unreasonable anyway. Just checking.

"Understood."

"You have talent. Persist, and who knows. Maybe self-teach."

So, conclusion: still beyond my control. Wasn't too downhearted. At least a backup in danger.

"By the way...."

"Yes?"

"Any religion you follow?"

"None particular."

This world recognized polytheism, even atheism. But no one denied gods' existence. Belief was separate.

"...I see."

"Why?"

"No, nothing."

Gawain waved dismissively.

Making me curious for nothing.

"No mana training either, so my mistake...."

His mutter as he left was faint.

Elijah gives me cookies. Every morning. Starting the day after I gifted her. Why me? Scary. Should be happy with kindness, but from Elijah? Terrifying. There's a saying about fattening the pig before slaughter. Is that it? Planning to eat me? Even villains don't eat human flesh, right?

...I'm losing it. What nonsense.

Days passed. Elijah got closer to the Moon Deer. Time to let me go, but no word.

Consistent workouts raised stats steadily. Now I could do a pull-up. Long way to go. Even mana I couldn't raise myself ticked up a bit. Moon Deer's doing. Thanks to daily luxury cookies, 13th room guys seriously debated founding my religion. Now arguing over bishop. Whatever. Honestly, watching is fun. Men stay kids no matter age.

"Is now the time for that?"

Level-headed Dillon stopped the whispering mob. Richard stepped up against him. Top bishop candidate.

"Dillon. Keep insulting the Dessert God, and we'll have to judge you. Troublesome."

"Burning! Burn the incompetent captain with fire's judgment!"

Lindel and Argon chimed in. Esmo, Dyke, Jerry, etc. Booing, thumbs down.

"But today...."

"Wipe the cookie crumbs off your mouth first."

"......"

Dillon turned, quickly wiping his mouth.

"Today is Lady Elijah's birthday."

Right. The day arrived. All 13th room had to go to Elijah's mansion by evening. Carriages outside—just bring bodies. They'd waited eagerly these days. Some sleepless last night. But none stepped first. Simple reason for cookie chatter like lunatics: all nervous.

"Arriving early is proper etiquette, no?"

"Y-yeah? Y-yeah...."

"I know, but, uh...."

Understandable. Direct heir of great noble Bebel family. Going to the mansion of Elijah, whom they pledge loyalty to.

In corner, I checked mirror, fixing hair.

"How's my work?"

Tall, freckled Pelin puffed chest. He'd just cut my hair. Overgrown and stuffy, no time before. Planned barber, but heard he learned pre-camp. Asked him.

"Better craft than expected."

Initially wary. How good could it be? But exceeded. Neat, not too prim. Swept bangs, checked again.

"Could go pro."

"Heh heh. Yup. Dad famous barber in territory. Learned watching. Even trimmed lord's hair and beard?"

Noble barbers high-status here. Indeed skilled.

"Tell me next time. Free for you anytime."

Price of cookies.

"Won't hesitate then."

"Anytime."

"This guy."

Richard sneaked up, hand on shoulder.

"Dressing up to impress the lady?"

Almost snapped. Even loyal Richard, that's crossing line.

"...Not at all."

"What do you mean? Why spruce up today?"

Swear, not to impress Elijah. Just had time today. What good impressing her? Kid my age-ish anyway.

"Dude. You're a guy after all?"

"Seems you're not the only one wanting to impress."

I glanced around. Coughs, averted eyes. Oiled slicked-back hair. Unusually neat clothes. Understandable. Beyond reason, future master Elijah—they wanted to shine. Kids her age might fantasize.

"Oho. So you too?"

"Not what I meant...."

"Yup~ Admitted~"

Richard teased obnoxiously. Argon and others joined.

Someone punch them....

No such luck. Couldn't delay forever. We 13th roomers exited amid jealous stares. Even 15th room envious. No Gulliet lately. Few days gone. Don't care how.

Outside gate, several carriages. Bebel sun emblem.

"Judas sir."

Anna there.

"Come with me."

Gasp from surroundings.

"Damn, real noble treatment...."

"Judas getting VIP...."

Noble-born candidates nonchalant. Ignoring embarrassment, I asked Anna,

"Mind detouring somewhere?"

"For what?"

"Buy a gift."

"...For the miss?"

"Yes."

Anna covered mouth, eyeing anxiously. Like she wanted to speak but couldn't. Richard sidled up slyly.

"Not trying to impress?"

"What's gift got to do?"

"Uh... Judas."

Dillon cautiously.

"Nobles don't accept gifts from anyone. Especially meaningful days like birthdays."

"...Ah."

Right. Strict class society. Lowly me couldn't gift Elijah freely. Even noble candidates probably not. For guard role, still untouchable gap.

Anna said similar before.

Others hadn't considered gifts.

Then why accept my flowers and cookies? Whim? Not birthday gifts then. Different.

"Judas. I get you admire her, but...."

Richard spouting nonsense—clamped his mouth.

"If refused, nothing for it. But going empty-handed bothers me."

"If ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠insistent.... Separate carriage possible. Time sufficient."

Thus, I split from group. Richard joined instead. Carriage: me, Richard, Anna.

"Judas sir. Surely not...."

"Not that."

"...Understood."

Blocked ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠her odd question. Richard hesitated, met eyes, shut up.

What everyone thinks....

Elijah walked boredly. Red carpet clashing muddy path. Far off, boys and youths knelt, heads bowed. Lined applicants for guard candidates. Not official 14th intake. Special selection for her birthday. By Duchess Narcissus.

Elijah scanned them indifferently.

Boring.

Weeks ago, Judas flashed. Defiant glare, not kneeling. Could've killed then, but didn't. Fun.

Yawning, she said,

"Clear them out."

Turned to leave—

"Miss—!"

Gawain's urgent shout halted her. Turning, a youth charged. Glinting object in hand. Instinct screamed.

Assassin....

Disguised applicant thrust small sharp weapon at Elijah's throat.