Chapter 145
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Translator: Prime Works
Chapter: 145
Chapter Title: A Joke That's Dead Serious (2)
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Most caves in the world have owners.
Tiger dens house tigers.
Snake pits coil with venomous serpents.
Cozy bear caves shelter grizzlies in their winter slumber.
This place was no exception—the Flame Cave nestled at the southern tip of the Eastern Mountains.
“Solo…… I want to escape this solo life now.”
Deep inside the Flame Cave.
A place filled with wistful sighs.
Soon, a massive bulk stirred.
*Crunch, thud!*
Just rolling over felt like a hill shifting—a 170-meter frame. Everyday side-sleeping shook the dungeon to its core with 6,000 tons of weight.
The Flame Cave's master, the Red Dragon Solitas, muttered.
“I'm…… lonely too now.”
A soliloquy heavy with sighs.
But no reply came.
Only the vast dungeon's distant walls echoed back emptily.
That fact only deepened Solitas's melancholy.
‘Damn. If I'd piled up some treasure, the echoes wouldn't be so bad.’
The Red Dragon's crimson eyes irritably scanned the dungeon's heart.
The center was barren.
No crowns or treasure chests as you'd expect in a dragon's lair. No rare artifacts or jewels, not even a common heap of gold coins.
In short, he was a penniless dragon.
‘Tch. No wonder I can't find a mate.’
Irritation and gloom doubled in Solitas's gaze.
Another needless sigh escaped.
‘Wish I wasn't a dragon.’
What if he'd been born human?
Maybe he could've escaped the pressure of hoarding treasures and riches just to marry.
‘Probably. Humans seem to farm a bit, find a partner, have kids, live decently, and die.’
If the countless job-hunting grads, soon-to-be newlyweds, youth, and peers living in 21st-century Korea heard that, they'd frantically look around for their lost common sense.
Unaware of such truths, Solitas only grumbled with sighs.
‘Ahh. I want to get married. I want to find a bride.’
But marriage required money.
No gold or jewels piled in his lair.
Even if he married, there'd be shortages for hatchlings.
Gold coins and jewels.
Those were hatchling food.
And he hadn't stockpiled any.
So no dragon would marry him.
That was the biggest problem.
‘In the old days, raiding a human city or threatening them would've solved it.’
Another sigh leaked from Solitas's massive maw.
He recalled his mother's words from hatchling days.
Back then—hundreds of years ago—gathering treasure wasn't this hard for dragons.
Plenty of easy ways.
‘Raid a city, threaten the king a bit. Or drag hundreds of dwarf artisans for forced labor. Or yank a whole treasure vault some greedy human noble hoarded through embezzlement.’
He'd heard old-era dragons amassed wealth easily that way.
And married without issue using it.
But now?
Impossible.
Because of the ‘Dragon's Law’ proclaimed to the world centuries ago by old-generation dragons led by Dragon King Berkis.
‘Damn that Dragon's Law!’
Its enforcement was ironclad.
Raiding human cities: forbidden.
Threats: forbidden, naturally.
No imprisoning dwarf artisans or enslaving them.
A pan-species peace declaration restricting dragons from unjust harm to other races without cause.
That was the ‘Dragon's Law's’ intent.
‘Intent my ass! Their generation gorged on bullying humans or extorting treasure into mountains, and now they play nice? Hypocrite boomers!’
Even if Dragon King Berkis married a human girl.
Even if he defeated the Demon Dragon that once ravaged the world.
Even if he devised and upheld a noble law.
Even if all races found peace and prosperity because of it.
To Solitas, a mere 1,050-year-old young adult dragon, such a law was utterly incomprehensible.
Especially the ‘New Treasure Hoarding Guidelines’ it promoted.
‘No raiding or threatening other species. So find veins yourself. Use dragon superiority in strength and stamina to mine unreachable mantle depths humans or dwarves can't touch. Process minerals with your skills and magic into treasure…… Damn it.’
That was the issue.
Solitas had followed the guidelines at first.
Right after independence from his mother, he scouted veins.
Deep underground, dozens of kilometers in the mantle.
He found a diamond vein.
Mined raw diamonds in heaps with his superior power and stamina.
But then came the problem.
‘Couldn't process them properly.’
He'd tried hard enough.
Really put effort in.
But results were abysmal.
No matter how carefully?
Diamonds came out lopsided.
Imbalanced, of course.
Scratches from botched work were common.
Processing 100 raw diamonds yielded zero successes.
Simple reason.
‘Fucking clumsy paws!’
Solitas cursed his crude, shoddy craftsmanship.
Cursed hands that never improved despite effort.
That was him.
He could mine minerals galore.
But couldn't jewel-cut properly.
Constant failures in processing.
Couldn't stockpile riches.
Failed gems lost all value as treasures.
‘So I'm a failure. Haven't hoarded properly since independence.’
Another deep sigh escaped at the thought.
‘Need to stockpile treasure. To feed future hatchlings tasty meals. But none exists. Hatchlings would starve soon after birth. What idiot dragon would marry a guy like me and raise kids?’
Even swapping perspectives, he saw no answer.
Zero marketability in the marriage game.
His self-portrait.
‘Sigh…… Whatever. Maybe give up on marriage.’
Fifty years as an adult.
Solitas now harbored such thoughts.
Around then, as the young Red Dragon sighed and scratched the dungeon floor in resignation.
“……Hm?”
Solitas paused mid-sigh.
Lifted his massive head, eyeing one side.
The passage from the center to the outside.
Something stirred beyond.
“Intruders?”
Not close.
Far outer edges, near the entrance.
A magic trap he'd set reacted.
It was being destroyed and dismantled in real-time.
Someone had entered the dungeon, breached the trap zone, and advanced toward the core.
Solitas unleashed dragon-unique transcendent senses. Grasped the intruders' profiles instantly.
‘Humans. Two. The nerve.’
*Thud!*
Solitas rose his colossal body.
Stamped pillar-like legs.
Unfurled 200-meter wings.
The young Red Dragon's eyes brimmed with thick killing intent.
‘Stressed lately anyway. Perfect timing.’
Rip them to shreds.
*Groooar!*
The enraged Red Dragon's steps thundered toward the outer intruders.
♣
*Spurt!*
Acidic solution sprayed.
Erupting from stone slabs.
Engulfing the broad passage.
But the momentum was fleeting.
*Slash, shink!*
Longsword flashed.
Bottom to top.
Lightning surge.
One slash cleaved space.
Sliced the filling acid.
Sword wind followed.
*Whooosh—!*
Overwhelming gale repelled every acid drop.
A temporary vacuum born.
Silver-haired man dashed through.
*Tat-tat!*
Three steps.
Haviel covered 30 meters effortlessly.
Lowered the raised sword on landing, unleashing wind.
A intricate magic circle etched there.
*Clang! Thud!*
Slab with the circle severed whole.
Acid spray ceased.
“Whew.”
Haviel caught his breath.
That was close, briefly.
Never expected such vicious acid from slabs.
His gaze turned back.
“You alright?”
“Yeah. More or less?”
Casual reply echoing down the passage.
Lloyd soon appeared, shrugging.
Haviel secretly sighed low.
‘How did I end up here with that guy…….’
Raiding a dragon's lair. Insanity.
‘Never thought Lord Lloyd's words then were serious.’
Truly hadn't.
Ten days ago, right?
Lloyd suddenly suggested a picnic, prompting Haviel's question.
Picnic? Where to, for what?
He'd asked, brow furrowed.
Lloyd replied:
“Dragon lair. To meet a dragon.”
Assumed joke, obviously.
Even when Lloyd proffered a backpack stuffed with ample food and camping gear, or mounted prepared horses.
Just another scheme.
Escort Lloyd well.
That was the thought.
Same during the ten-day journey.
Occasionally asked the destination.
Lloyd shrugged: ‘Told you. Dragon lair.’
Still took as joke.
Hiding real goal with lame humor for some reason.
That's all.
Never dreamed it'd be a polite visit to an actual dragon lair!
“……Whew.”
Never knew his young lord was this mad.
Haviel doubted humanity itself.
“That's why. Asking again. Even here, turn back?”
Dead serious.
Lloyd just raised a brow.
“Nope?”
“…….”
“What. Why. What.”
“…….”
“I've got plans and countermeasures. Just trust me, keep breaching traps?”
“Whew. Traps are no issue, but—”
Haviel sighed deeply.
“How long do we breach? Till we face the dragon?”
“Yeah. Spot on.”
“…….”
“Push till we meet the dragon?”
“…….”
“Told you. Dragon lair. Meeting a dragon.”
“But…….”
“It's fine. Got plans and countermeasures ready.”
“…….”
Did he really?
Absurd, but no choice.
Already this far.
‘Guess I trust him again.’
Haviel steeled himself.
Lloyd was trustworthy in such moments.
Always unveiled unimaginable countermeasures.
Always had.
So trust now too.
‘And if his plans fail, escape at all costs, prioritizing him.’
Haviel resolved.
Prioritize Lloyd if danger struck.
Stepped forward with that vow.
Then it began.
*Shwick, clank! Boom-boom-boom—!*
Myriad traps barred the silver knight's path.
Acid sprays baseline.
Lightning bolts and flames.
Poison arrows and steam blasts.
Falling rocks and nightmarish illusions.
Freezing air and blinding flashes.
Trials testing human limits nonstop.
But Haviel was a Swordmaster.
Swordmasters transcend human bounds.
Each sword flash cleaved, shattered, warped, split traps. No trick fooled his senses; no trap harmed him.
How far did they advance?
How many corridors and corners passed?
Finally, a vast space opened.
A crimson-scaled behemoth loomed over them.
“You humans must be the ones invading my abode.”
*Roooar—!*
The Red Dragon hurled the query.
A plain question.
Yet it whipped storm-like echoes across the space.
No mere echo.
“……!”
Body shuddered.
Every cell screamed under pressure.
Feeling the aura storm, Haviel moved fast.
Blocked Lloyd.
Sword forward.
Aura surged.
*Zzzing—!*
Radiant glory coiled the blade.
Haviel resonated aura, invading space.
*Hummm—!*
Aura waves shook air.
Matched the Red Dragon Solitas's aura speed. Resonated. Canceled.
*Splash!*
Sound waves clashed before him.
Devoured each other, scattering midair.
Deflecting dragon's greeting-attack, Haviel whipped around.
“Lord Lloyd, tell me the countermeasure now.”
Time to respond.
Voice urgent.
Dragon before them.
One clash confirmed it.
No illusion.
Real dragon.
Botch this, die.
Proof: Red Dragon inhaling deeply post-greeting.
‘Breath.’
Instinct screamed.
Dragon's deadliest weapon, fatal authority.
Inhaling for breath attack.
Little time left.
He pressed Lloyd again.
“Lord Lloyd.”
“Yeah. Countermeasure's already in motion?”
“……Pardon?”
Already in motion?
What?
Haviel tilted his head.
Then Lloyd grinned oddly.
“You.”
“Pardon?”
“You.”
“…….”
No way.
“What're you doing. Not fighting.”
“…….”
For real? Seriously?
“You can win easy, right?”
“…….”
Haviel stared in disbelief.
Truly mad?
But oddly, in this pinch.
Lloyd seemed utterly calm.
Like someone with an ace.
Or true confidence.
Staring calmly, gesturing casually at the dragon.
Then the Red Dragon's maw gaped.
Dreadful heat gushed like nightmare.
*Rooooaaar—!*
Red Dragon Solitas's breath.
Hellfire storm engulfed them.