Rest (4)
The instant the word Challenger left Sirin’s lips, Charlotte and Yuria’s faces locked into rigid masks.
They had already been stiff, but this was different—a hardness steeped in pure shock.
“H-how does a god even know that name…?”
“Life is the sole province of the gods. The Elixir, too, is a divine relic. For a mere mortal to reach for either is, in itself, an act of considerable arrogance—a challenge.”
A gentle, almost affectionate smile settled over Sirin’s deeply solemn face.
“And yet I find it a truly beautiful challenge. Precisely because you are mortal, because you are human, you are able to make it.”
Her eyes curved into soft crescents.
“I respect it. You who would break the shell and step into a new world… you shine so brightly. So take care. The apostles of the gods will not leave that light alone.”
Then, just as quickly, her expression returned to its usual self.
“Ahem. And though I cannot say when that Noah fellow will wake, deliver this one message for me.”
Sirin’s gaze swept over us.
Charlotte’s mouth hung open; she offered no reply.
Yuria was sweating buckets… and likewise said nothing.
I was no different.
In the end, Sirin cleared her throat awkwardly and continued.
“Kalt was a wretch even I could never catch… so the one who slew him now may take even greater pride in it. Well… saying so will only earn me half-hearted reactions, I suppose. Hohoho! Then this body shall take its leave!”
She flung the door wide and vanished beyond it.
She did not simply leave.
She literally disappeared.
Charlotte and Yuria sprang up in a panic and gave chase, but they could not catch her.
And so the interior of Charlotte’s office was swallowed by a silence so profound it felt as though a storm had just passed through.
My insides, by contrast, were in utter uproar.
My head felt ready to burst; everything was a tangled mess.
Sirin’s words refused to connect, each one floating free and thrashing about inside my skull.
Her resemblance to Noah. That miracle-like magic. The way she spoke and acted as if she knew every one of us. The remarks that sounded like prophecy of the future.
And… Challenger.
I slowly turned my gaze toward Yuria, the one Sirin had named a Challenger.
She was still staring, trembling eyes fixed on the empty space where Sirin had stood.
Then—
“H-hey, girls. So I’ve been reading this novel lately, right…?”
“Out of nowhere, what the h—”
“No, I mean… uh… that little brat… maybe she regressed from the future to the present? What do you two think?”
Charlotte’s completely random remark snapped me back to myself.
“I’m already dying of confusion here, so shut the hell up.”
“Ah… r-right.”
Under Yuria’s murderous glare, Charlotte scratched her head sheepishly and plopped back into her seat.
She quietly pulled out a mana cigarette, lit it, and looked at me.
“I get what you’re curious about, but…”
“Then please answer me. What is this ‘Challenger’ Sirin spoke of?”
“Fucking hell, that crazy little brat… why’d she have to go and blab about that…”
Charlotte raked her fingers through her hair in irritation, took a deep drag, and exhaled a long sigh.
No.
If I was going to ask, better to ask the person concerned.
I turned my head toward Yuria.
She was already looking at me, as if she had expected it.
“First… may I sit down?”
“Of course…”
“Thank you.”
Yuria walked over weakly, perched on the edge of the sofa, carefully chose her words, and finally spoke.
“Lady Rubia… no. Priestess. What do you think of Erden?”
An unreadable hostility flickered in the eyes that met mine.
Not only hostility.
There was also the look of someone wondering just how much I knew.
“I am fully aware this is an extremely rude question. I know it is insolent as well. If you grow angry, I will endure it. So please… answer me honestly.”
Yuria bowed her head, then slowly raised it again.
Her eyes held an even denser hostility.
I could not tell whether that hostility was aimed at me or at Erden.
I did not know—
and it pissed me off.
Heat rose; rage boiled over.
All the stress that had been piling up slowly until now began to scrape against the crown of my head.
The fury exploding inside me spread all the way to my fingertips, making even the muscles of my face prickle.
I am no saint.
My tolerance is not broad.
I am petty, my jealousy is ugly, and my nature is dark and damp.
I am the kind of brat who must have whatever I want.
I am a pathetic human who cannot even stand other people looking at what is mine.
And so this situation—
this situation that seemed to be moving without me,
those eyes that seemed to dismiss me—
made me furious beyond measure.
“Haha…”
I had held it in so well.
I had pressed it down so carefully.
And now, of all times, it was about to burst.
This was not the moment for it.
Why could I not control it?
No. It was not that I could not.
I simply did not want to.
Was it because unbelievable things had crashed down on me all at once?
Or because I had thought I understood this world, only to discover I did not?
“Honestly, about Erden…”
It might have been the faint divine power I had sensed from Kalt’s vanished sword.
It might have been that I still had not settled after a great battle.
“I… I mean…”
Or was it because I, who had believed I would never die, had felt that I might?
Because I had been so pathetic, buried in the dirt, able to do nothing but writhe like a worm even as Kalt tore my limbs apart?
No.
It was simply that
Noah, the one beside me,
the person I love, was suffering,
and I could do nothing for her,
and that was
utterly
“fucking disgusting.”
It was disgusting.
It made me burn with rage.
It choked me.
And the fact that I could only swallow it down inside myself,
and the world that had forced me into this state,
Erden,
the Sun,
Lilith,
and I myself, who borrowed that power—
“I find it loathsome and hateful. I want to gather every last bastard who has so much as dipped a toe in it and slaughter them all.”
“W-what…?”
“Ru…bia?”
Two pairs of eyes, steeped in horror, turned toward me.
I checked once more that Noah was still asleep.
I looked closely, listened to her breathing,
then opened my mouth again.
“You might think there could be innocents among them. No. Even so, I want to kill every single one. End of the world or not, whether the world goes to shit or not, I want to hunt those sons of bitches down and kill them all.”
The faces of humans drunk on pleasure rose before me.
Men and women alike, writhing in carnal lust.
The devotees who swallowed suspicious drugs while calling them the goddess’s blessing.
The humans who brought even their own children, eager to offer them as sacrifices.
The sticky gazes that had fixed on me.
The humans who had sent slimy looks my way, insisting the Priestess’s seed must be left behind.
The high priests.
The devotees.
The humans.
All of them.
I wanted to kill them.
“Charlotte, Yuria. I do not know how you two regard Erden. You might like it, you might hate it. Perhaps this question is meant to test me. I do not believe you are apostles sent from Erden. Yet various worries remain. Even so, I will speak honestly.”
Charlotte’s mana cigarette slipped from her fingers with a soft tuk.
Yuria’s mouth fell open.
Carefully, I reached out and laid my hand on Noah’s body.
She was sleeping soundly.
I spoke.
“It is fucking disgusting. It is pure shit. They are worthless bastards. Yes. When I first escaped Erden, my heart was still soft. I could not even kill the knights who pursued me. I thought they were all innocent. I thought they were beings who only followed orders from above. But.”
The knights who had come to the ruins rose in my memory.
After that, they had sent countless trackers after us.
“They were all the same humans. Their words were base. They did not look at me as a Priestess. They called me Erden’s bitch. Sometimes they even tried to peer into our room from the building across the way. So—”
Every time that happened,
“I put Noah to sleep, went out myself, and smashed those bastards’ heads open. When I approached with a gentle smile, they lowered their weapons. It was so easy. And yet I always left one alive. I sent him back to Erden. After cutting off every finger, pulling every tooth, and then healing him cleanly. I sent him. Again and again.”
I killed them.
I killed them all.
“So eventually they stopped sending anyone. Heh heh… I do not know whether they now think I have gone mad. Perhaps this madness is exactly the direction they wanted. But what can I do? I have already become this.”
“W-wait… Ru… Rubia…”
“Is that enough? Lady Yuria, I do not know whether your gaze was aimed at me or at Erden. But there is one thing I want you to understand clearly.”
I took Noah’s hand in mine.
“As the Priestess, I find Erden—”
I steadied my trembling breath.
“the goddess Lilith—”
I chewed every syllable as I spoke.
“utterly, fucking disgusting.”
And then I smiled.
I drained my coffee.
It was bitter and lukewarm, yet it felt cool.
Refreshing.
The divine power drifting through my body seemed to stir with my emotions, rising in pleasant excitement.
My own mood lifted with it.
A deep smile curved my lips.
“Are you satisfied?”
I drank the coffee again.
It was sweet.
Clap, clap, clap—
A timid round of applause came from my left.
Charlotte was clapping in open admiration.
“Fucking… fucking cool.”
“Pardon?”
“Shiiit… damn… yeah… this is it… this is Rubia. This is the Rubia I know… This is the look that made me fall for you, you know? Look at that, look. The halo is insane.”
I turned toward the direction her fingertip pointed.
Just as she said, divine power that had spilled free of my control was shining brightly behind me, illuminating the entire room.
“W-what…”
I hurriedly tried to rein it in and scatter it,
but it only rippled mockingly, refusing to disperse, growing even brighter.
“Uh, um… yes. I… I am sorry, Lady Rubia.”
Even Yuria finally bowed her head in awe.
“I… simply… um… I am sorry… I never imagined you harbored such hatred…”
The hostility was gone.
The dismissiveness was gone as well.
Yet my divine power remained.
“Yes. So please answer me. What exactly is a Challenger?”
I simply gave up and spread the divine power even wider.
I wrapped the entire building and finished the soundproofing.
Only then did the divine power scatter and return into my body.
“…Mm… the soundproofing is complete. Now, please speak.”
“Yes… with hatred of this degree, there should be no harm in telling you… haha…”
Yuria swallowed dryly and slowly opened her mouth.
“A Challenger… is a term for those who challenge the Sun.”
“The Sun…”
Lilith.
“Those whose purpose is to challenge it and, in the end, shatter it. People like that.”
Yuria tilted the teacup before her to her lips, then continued.
“In other words… those capable of twisting the very foundation of the world as defined by the goddess Lilith are called Challengers.”
“The foundation… of the world?”
From outside the window came the rumble of countless carriages.
The lively chatter of merchants.
The peaceful noise of the city.
“The world we live in—”
The words that followed from Yuria’s mouth never reached my mind.