Others' Gazes (11)
“Nah, honestly, I don’t know for sure. But Yumi used to swing by the club room once a week, and she hasn’t shown up for several weeks now, so maybe that’s why. You’ve probably guessed from what I said, but there’s some personal relationship drama mixed in. Anyway, Lee Hyun, do you know Yumi?”
“....No. I’ve never met her.”
“Never met her? Then have you at least heard anything about her?”
“........”
Even though she’d brought up Yumi herself, Lee Hyun hesitated, unsure how to respond to Eunhyeok’s follow-up question. She’d perked up the moment Seonghwan’s name came up, eavesdropping on the seniors’ conversation, only for the talk about Yumi to inevitably tie back to him. That’s why she’d blurted it out, spilling her true feelings without thinking.
From an outsider’s perspective, it was an oddly bold question coming from a fresh-faced freshman. Naturally, Eunhyeok shot her a surprised look. With no excuse ready, Lee Hyun just hemmed and hawed until Jia, sitting beside her, jumped in.
“Yumi sunbae, isn’t she in the PE Education Department?”
“Oh? Yeah! Right.”
“We’re in the Education College, right? Heh. There was this list floating around called the ‘Education College Beauty Roster,’ and I’d heard her name on it. That’s how I knew about her.”
“Aha! Yeah, come to think of it, you guys are her direct juniors. Man, I didn’t even realize. Don’t go spreading rumors to your department seniors, okay? Things are kinda headache-y right now.”
Lee Hyun wanted to ask why that couple had broken up, but she bit it back. Probing further would just make everyone suspicious. Even Jia’s quick cover had its limits.
By then, glasses were being refilled, and as everyone raised their drinks for a cheer, Seonghwan started loading the table with fresh meat.
“Whoa, check out Seonghwan setting up the grill? Back when you were a freshman, you wouldn’t lift a finger till the seniors cooked for you, haha.”
“That’s ’cause I was new and didn’t know what to do, playing it safe. I set up the cups and chopsticks, didn’t I?”
“Whoa. Real brag-worthy stuff there.”
They traded jokes like that whenever Seonghwan came and went, but he and Eunhyeok never chatted beyond part-timer and customer. The hall was getting busier with incoming crowds, keeping Seonghwan occupied, and he had no intention of lingering at their table anyway. Naturally, Eunhyeok shifted to talking mostly with the freshmen.
“Hyeonseok, how’d you and your girlfriend meet? Spill the story.”
Hyeonseok’s girlfriend, Yuyeon, hadn’t drawn as much attention early on since Lee Hyun had overshadowed her, but her fresh, bubbly newbie vibe was plenty to catch the guys’ eyes. Plus, being the club president’s girl was headline material.
“Oh yeah, tell us. You bragged about her to us nonstop, dude.”
“Ugh, man. You’re really throwing that in my face? I’m dying of embarrassment here.”
“You did the bragging, now you’re embarrassed. Just tell it.”
As eyes turned to her, Yuyeon fidgeted, unsure what to do. Naturally, all those gazes landed on Hyeonseok. Lee Hyun was among them, and when their eyes met briefly, he hesitated before clearing his throat and diving in.
“I went to our Humanities College OT in February, right? I usually ignore that stuff, but a friend on the exec team begged me to show. That’s where I met Yuyeon. She was in my group. Anyway, we got friendly bit by bit.”
“That’s it? You just naturally started dating? With you?”
“What’s that supposed to mean, huh? Nah, that’s not all. We had a general elective together. I spotted her from afar and sat next to her on purpose. She didn’t have other classes with anyone, so we got close like that.”
“And that’s it? Who confessed?”
“Me, the guy. You think Yuyeon would? She likes stuffed animals—always has ’em dangling from her bag, super obvious. So I confessed with a plushie gift.”
“Ooh, Yuyeon’s simple, huh? Accepting a confession over just a doll. Or were you two already into each other?”
Yujae eyed her with quiet admiration, but Yuyeon shook her head.
“No, I got the confession like that, but we didn’t start dating right away. It was early March, and I hesitated a bit. Then on White Day, he gave me another gift, and we made it official. He took me to this fancy restaurant and confessed again.”
“Eww? Yeah, that tracks. If it was just a doll, we’d all have girlfriends by now. Right, Chanwoo?”
“Yeah, totally.”
Chanwoo mumbled through a mouthful of pork belly, wrinkling Yujae’s nose as he watched his friend. Then, as if it just hit him, Yujae asked again.
“But the gap between dates isn’t that big. What happened in between?”
“Nah, nothing special. We just had classes together, ate lunch sometimes. That’s it.”
“Too bland. How do feelings sprout that fast?”
“No, I already liked him by then.”
“Huh? What?”
To solo Yujae, it was incomprehensible. The idea of sudden feelings blooming out of nowhere was beyond him.
Yuyeon reminisced as she continued.
“When Hyeonseok oppa first confessed, he dragged me to a claw machine arcade—not buying, but grabbing prizes. Out of nowhere, he said, ‘Let’s spend just 20,000 won. If you win a doll by then, date me.’”
“Whoa? Oh shit. Hyeonseok, you planned that far ahead?”
“Ugh, shut up. You’re embarrassing me. I wanna plug my ears. Goosebumps everywhere.”
Hyeonseok couldn’t hush his girlfriend, so he scolded his friend instead, face flushing as he mimed covering his ears.
“So? You didn’t win, right? Pretended to cave later and accepted?”
Yuyeon shook her head again, denying Yujae’s guess.
“No, I won. With just 5,000 won. But later I found out—he’d rigged it beforehand, pumping money into one machine, nudging the dolls to the edge for an easy grab.”
“Fuck, that sneaky bastard? But you won and still turned him down?”
“It was so sudden, I rejected without thinking. I was thrilled with the doll, but who knows if it was really feelings for him? I just grabbed it and bolted.”
“Then what?”
“After that... he was on my mind. Every time I saw the doll, every time I hung it on my bag—Hyeonseok oppa popped into my head. And him casually sitting next to me in class like nothing happened? Weird. Before I knew it, I was interested, then realized it was a crush. So I accepted the next confession.”
“Fuck. You shot a whole rom-com, you sly dog. Respect. Jealous as hell of that ballsy plan—claw machine to confession on the spot.”
“Ugh, fuck off. So embarrassing!”
Listening to others’ love stories was always fascinating. Lee Hyun was no exception. Despite her earlier apathy, she was hooked on the couple across from her.
A stuffed animal?
Her own bag had a worn bear plush dangling from it. She glanced down at it hanging off her chair. A lucky prize Seonghwan had snagged from the claw machine under a PC bang when they were kids. He’d been beaming, planning to gift it to her sister Lee Yeon, but Lee Hyun had basically snatched it away.
She didn’t even like dolls much, but jealousy had made her throw a fit back then. Seonghwan always did that—only ever trying to impress Yeon. As kids, as teens. He’d never once gone out of his way for her.
Hyeonseok rigging a machine for Yuyeon? Unthinkable for Seonghwan. Not his style, and she didn’t expect that kind of thoughtfulness anyway. Their shared daily life lacked those little gestures other guys might do, but Seonghwan’s actions were always genuine.
That’s why she knew. He wouldn’t hand over a doll meant for someone else just because she whined. He’d buy a new one first. She knew him better than anyone—that’s why the bear was precious.
Even knowing she’d throw a fit, he’d teased about Yeon before handing it over with a sigh. Infuriating, but... she loved how he always hid his sincerity, only for her to see right through it every time.
No need for grand new efforts—every day felt special back then. But what really stung in Yuyeon’s words wasn’t the doll. It was how receiving it, feeling his effort, made her notice him—and how that grew into a crush over time.
It hurt. Back in middle school, after the PC bang fiasco got him chewed out by her dad, Seonghwan had avoided her. One day, spotting him from afar, her heart racing with joy—then she saw it. He’d spotted her too late and ducked behind a building.
Overlooking that she could spot him from a mile away, the idiot hid. That heartbreaking sadness lingered as a scar. The pain of someone close turning away, the regret of only noticing their absence after they were gone—it welled up like an undercurrent.
Yuyeon’s words—noticing someone who enters your daily life, developing feelings—contrasted sharply with her own past: only realizing and regretting after they’d slipped away. It left Lee Hyun melancholy.
She reached for the soju bottle to refill her glass.
Clink.
Lost in thought as she poured, Eunhyeok snatched it away in surprise, filling her glass instead.
“Hey, junior. You’ll get me in trouble. Tradition says the person drinking with you pours, right?”
“....Yeah.”
“Whoa, Hyun drinks well. Mind if I drop the formalities?”
“Sure, it’s fine. We’ll see each other a lot, and I hate awkwardness too.”
Eunhyeok grinned, pleased, and kept chatting.
“Haha, yeah, we’ll be seeing plenty of each other.”
Just as they raised glasses, others butted in.
“Sunbae, include us too. Why just you two?”
“Yeah, yeah. Good call, Yujae. Let’s all cheer.”
“Then... me too.”
Yujae and Chanwoo jumped in; Hyoseok slyly extended his glass. In the end, they all clinked and drank.
“Ahh. So, Hyun, how do you know Seonghwan? Saw it on your signup sheet—you two seemed tight already.”
“......He’s my next-door oppa. We’ve hung out since we were kids.”
“Whoa? Childhood friends? Damn, longer than I thought. No wonder it felt off.”
Eunhyeok muttered casually, but the vague edge in his tone grated on Lee Hyun.
“Why? What’s weird about it?”
Oblivious to her sharpened glare, Eunhyeok lit up at her response and rambled on.
“Just couldn’t picture you two hanging out. Different departments, years, and you just started uni—how’d you get so close? Felt weird.”
“Totally. At first, when Seonghwan hyung showed up with Hyun, I thought he was chasing her or something. Y’know, ‘punching above his weight.’ Haha.”
Eunhyeok had a point. If they were strangers, nothing screamed “close”—majors, ages, gender, zilch.
But Hyeonseok’s follow-up twisted her mood sharply.
Punching above his weight?
He wasn’t even that drunk, yet he cackled to himself. Yuyeon elbowed him, thinking it excessive, but he brushed it off as a joke, still chuckling.
That’s a joke too? Brainless? Talking shit like that about someone older, like his hyung?
Thud. Lee Hyun slammed her glass down.
“Huh? You didn’t drink yet? Thirsty?”
Hyeonseok’s flippant joke-slinging made her want to puke.
Not yet... and Seonghwan oppa’s right here in the shop.
She remembered Hyoseok’s snide remark to the boss upsetting Seonghwan, who’d scolded her later. No way she’d stir drama and sour his mood again. Ruining the club vibe after leaving would hurt him too.
“I’m not great with booze, so I’ll go slow.”
“Ah, got it. Eat some meat with it. Hey, Chanwoo, slow down, man. You inhale the red stuff. Hyung, more meat?”
“Yeah, eat up. Seonghwan, another round.”
At Eunhyeok’s cue, Yujae called without hesitation.
“Yes, sir? More orders?”
“Whoa, Seonghwan hyung’s so polite. Gotta come back.”
“Happy to have you. What’ll it be?”
“Five more pork belly, three soju bottles.”
Seonghwan turned to Lee Hyun at Yujae’s order. Her face looked fine, but remembering carrying her home once, he warned quietly.
“Hey, ease up on the kids. Especially the girls—keep ’em in check.”
“Don’t worry, hyungnim. We’ll take responsibility to the end.”
“Bullshit. Who said you wolves get to ‘take responsibility’? I’d rather carry ’em myself than trust you with the girls.”
“Oh right, heard Hyun lives next door. But dude, isn’t that clingy?”
“If something happens to Hyun, how do I face her sister? So shut up and moderate. Thirty minutes in, and seven soju bottles? Hyun, you too—pace yourself.”
He ended looking at her, but Lee Hyun avoided his eyes, downing her glass instead.
“Man, what an attitude. Worry about her, and she bitches anyway.”
“Funny. If you’re so worried, why drag in Yeon unnie?”
“You idiot? It’s the truth.”
“Truth my ass. Still dishonest as ever.”
“What? Tripping me up again? Wanna go?”
“Boss! This part-timer’s threatening customers!”
“Are you nuts?”
The mild-mannered part-timer Seonghwan and the quiet drinker Lee Hyun suddenly turned on each other, pointing and bickering. The table stared blankly.
“Whoa, what’s with them?”
“Yeah? Hyun’s got a feisty side.”
“Seonghwan hyung too. Classic sibling rivalry where they can’t stand each other?”
“Nah, I have a little sis, but we were like that as kids. Now we’re distant—no full-on fights. Weird.”
Eunhyeok and the crew exchanged baffled glances at the duo’s squabble.
Sigh. Why can’t they just be honest with each other?
Jia sighed beside them.
Next-door oppa. Next-door dongsaeng. If they’d skipped those labels when introducing themselves...
Would anyone here still see them as just siblings? Jia felt frustrated by how they trapped each other in prejudices. Strip those away, and their care for one another shone clearest—yet they couldn’t shed the “oppa-dongsaeng” shackles.
In others’ eyes, only those chains were visible. In others’ eyes, only the old labels remained.
Trapped in those gazes, the two lived on.