Others' Gazes (7)
Seonghwan wasn't ugly by any stretch. He was pushing 180cm tall, with surprisingly long arms and legs for his frame, and a smallish face that made people think he looked even taller than he was. Add in his status as a Korea University student, and in a world where height and build did half the work and status planted the seed of bias, he could appeal to girls as above-average looking, at least. If he put in a little effort, he figured he could pass for handsome—maybe even a solid "hottie," if not a knockout. Sure, only his mom ever said that, and he hadn't inherited much from his paternal side, but still...
It was just that the guys around him were all freaks of nature. Minhwan, Yun-su, and that fucking Mincheol. Flip it around, though: aside from those three, no one in his circle had ever called him ugly to his face.
Fuck, was I adopted or something? Hell, even my little uncle and my dad are total players.
Tall, with that pretty-boy parasite vibe. His little uncle, who was past forty now and still turning heads.
If I put him up against the girls outside right now in a vote—me versus little uncle—who'd win? I'd still lose, huh?
Even comparing himself to his uncle—who'd apparently blown off studying to chase women—filled him with self-loathing. And they were fifteen years apart.
At least my dick's bigger...
Back in high school, during a sweltering summer weeding graves, they'd all hit the bathhouse together. That was the first time Seonghwan had ever stolen the spotlight among the relatives.
What the—no way, did this kid dump all his hair and face blessings straight into his cock? You get surgery or something?
He could still feel the pride swelling up from his uncle's shocked exclamation. Fuck yeah, bring it on.
"Try to understand, man."
"Huh?"
Snapping Seonghwan out of his thoughts was none other than Eunhyeok. After Mincheol spat his piece and stormed off, Eunhyeok had been left standing there awkwardly, now apologizing on his behalf.
"That guy's been a total hysteric lately. You might've heard, but Yumi dumped him. He's been like this ever since."
"Ah..."
Seonghwan couldn't have missed it. Yumi had already made up her mind to break up and had vented to him about it plenty of times. Usually right after sex, lying in bed together.
"He's picking fights with anyone he can grab. Overkill on you, though. Yumi used to look out for you a lot back in the day. Probably part of it. And if Yumi's with someone else...? Nah, I'm just talking shit."
"He's freaking out thinking Yumi cheated?"
"Huh? You heard something? How'd you know?"
"Dude's acting exactly like that. Grilling me on who I came with, where I've been—like a detective interrogating a suspect."
"Haa... yeah, fuck, that tracks."
Eunhyeok let out a frustrated sigh. Seonghwan pressed on.
"But why's it bugging you? That's between Mincheol and Yumi. No reason for you to jump in."
"Ugh, just drop the formal shit with me. No one's around, it's awkward. Your birthday's even before mine. Who cares?"
"Alright, Eunhyeok."
"...Fucking fast, man. Were you waiting? Shameless bastard. Every time I see you, it's like—you're all timid and glancing around one minute, then bam, you're owning the room. You're a weird one."
"You told me to drop it. Anyway, from that sigh, sounds like it's not just their drama."
"Sharp as hell. Dickhead. Haa... suck. You know Mincheol's type, right? Prideful, loves being catered to more than catering. Lives off his own hype."
"Yeah, I know. Only senior I avoided in the club room. Not like there aren't assholes around me anyway."
"What? Whatever. Point is, the club's a total shitshow now. He's been stirring crap everywhere, scaring off the underclassmen. Freshmen too. Even those kids you came in with switched clubs. With Yumi gone, it's fucked."
"Yumi's fault or Mincheol's?"
"Both. Real talk—how many guy underclassmen had a thing for Yumi? Think we didn't notice? My cohort too. And... honestly, even if I gave up on her ages ago, you think I had zero interest?"
Seonghwan stared at him in shock. Eunhyeok's sudden confession, even if he'd moved on. And the reveal that the club guys were into Yumi? A bit of a gut punch.
"You didn't know? Eyesight good or blind as fuck? Explains why you missed the jealousy too."
"Jealousy? From who besides Mincheol? No clue."
"God, you dense fuck. You knew Yumi treated you special, right? She said it was 'cause you seemed friendless as a repeater, but facts are facts. I get why Mincheol went after you—first I'm hearing why you bailed, but I'd be pissed too."
Seonghwan finally recalled the past. Her forcing lunches to match his schedule. Always sitting next to him at drinks. Hugging his neck so tight her massive tits squished against him.
"Uh... fuck. Kinda, yeah."
"Whole body's a sweet potato, huh? No wonder you hung with Yumi cluelessly. Others watched Mincheol and played it safe."
"Whatever. I left, so no more beef with him. What hysterics is he pulling in the club room?"
Eunhyeok thumped his chest in frustration.
"Didn't you hear? Think the other guys had no crushes on Yumi? Other guy's rice cake looks bigger, but one that's free looks tastiest. Mincheol sniffed it out."
"Straight-up intimidation, huh."
"Not all. Fuck... hate to say it, but Yumi cheating feels half-confirmed. Mincheol acts dead sure. That's why he's rampaging."
"Whoa... other guy's from our school?"
"Solid guess. Her sudden move near campus is sus. Kicked him to the curb with zero wiggle room. Fuck, I dunno."
"......"
Eunhyeok had no clue the culprit was right there—or that he was spilling to him. But that wasn't what mattered to Seonghwan.
Yumi must've dumped him hard. Thought it was just a breakup notice, but sounds deeper.
"Be comfortable here, but don't get too comfy. Guess that sacred senior's wisdom's toast?"
"You call that wisdom? I'm dying here. Bigger issue's the club budget."
"Club budget?"
"You dipped early, so you missed it. Every year, new clubs stress the old ones. Right now, shit like 'AI 3D Modeling Club' or '3D Printer Research Group' are applying."
"Huh? What's 3D got to—wait, how's that our problem?"
"Dense fuck. Club rooms are fixed. School ain't expanding or handing out empties. Budget ain't growing. So? Low performers or no freshmen get axed. 3D whatever sounds flashier than our Kihaeng Club. No freshmen, members bailing—next year's activity report's just us seniors."
"Holy shit."
He hadn't seen it coming. Comfort made him forget the duties to keep it.
"No instant disband, but you know: no mid-line, you're a candle in the wind. Sophomore guys enlist or take leave pre-army. Freshmen gotta bridge that, recruit more. With everyone gone? No shot. Age gap too big for us to lure 'em."
Now Seonghwan got it. Guys usually left after year 2—army or leave. Seniors propped it up. Year-by-year bridges were key. Guys go, girls follow. No girls? Bridge crumbles. Repeat, history dies. Just a few stragglers keeping the pulse.
Eunhyeok, with his club memories, just seemed sad.
"Yumi domino toppled this far? What'd Mincheol even do?"
"He trashed, but... Yumi's role was huge too. Know what she did? Empty spot shows. Tiny club like ours? Hurts more."
"Damn."
5-6 active per year. 10 tops for events. Yumi drove it all. Bones-deep truth. Mincheol wrecking that? Impressive in a fucked way.
"So, uh..."
"Yeah?"
Eunhyeok whispered conspiratorially. Seonghwan clocked the ask coming.
"Know any freshmen? Your dept's got 'em. Recommend us some potentials? Post-orientation, no excuse to snag 'em."
"What? Your dept got none? You know I skip dept stuff."
Seonghwan gawked, but Eunhyeok eyed elsewhere—toward Yuri, staring blankly from afar.
"Her? She's not a freshman."
"So? Mascot with that face? Promo gold. Guys swarm, girls follow."
"Fuck, man. Why twist a pure hobby club into that?"
"Told you to chill, now swearing? Hobby my ass. Sink or swim time. Club's fate? Scared she'll get flies? Insecure?"
"No, this fu—"
Words jammed. Mincheol's barbs had his pride raw. You lowly shit. Inferiority wounds reopening.
Insecure? Me? Yesul dumped Yun-su for me. Yuri just made out with me. Even that prick's ex fucked me.
Untouchable beauties. He trusted their feelings more than his own.
Why dodge?
He glanced at Yuri. Her clear gaze, pure.
But... if pre-me she hated stares... can't push my greed. Plus, gym gallery leak—club exposure's too much.
He wanted to brag. Girls into him. Hot ones. But selfish.
He shook his head. "Double major. Econ and public admin—tons to memorize. Studied hard today. Can't drag her to a club as a figurehead. Shitty move."
"Whoa, double? Fuck, impressive. High GPA—our school hates approving. Sucks. She'd save us. You two dating? Or just vibing? Spill."
"...Just vibing."
"Helluva vibe. Anyway..."
"Fish management? Chill."
"Dick... oh, club's future? Hyeonseok's ghosted since prez."
"Hyeonseok too? Thought he cared."
"Who knows hearts. Got a girl, glued to her. Texts? Rare pop-in. Told him bring her, play here—nope. 'Break up or not, club's forever.'"
"Kinda noble."
"Noble my ass. We'll fold first."
Whatever his true feelings, Seonghwan never doubted Eunhyeok's loyalty. Hyped Yumi, but backed her hard. For Korea U grinders, club was chill spot, hobby haven. Hence the attachment.
Suddenly struck him. "Freshmen okay? One guy, one girl?"
"What? You know some? Couple?"
"Not couple, but wish they were. Hold up."
Seonghwan pulled KakaoTalk.
Messages flew wild after a few taps. Exhausted, Seonghwan caught Eunhyeok peeking.
"Who're they? How you know 'em? Coming tomorrow?"
"Explain then. Not sure all, but chatty girl's lively—club'll perk up. Time before shift to onboard 'em."
"Damn, Seonghwan came through. Social beast? Faking the loner?"
"Loner my ass. Come tomorrow. I'll intro, you feed 'em. First-day meal mandatory?"
"Deal. Drag Hyeonseok too. Haha, bonus win. Oh, wait..."
"Yeah? She's waited long."
Yuri inched closer, shyly. Post-Mincheol vibe better? Her face relaxed seeing them chat amiably. Guilty for stalling, Seonghwan rushed him.
"What? Spit it."
Eunhyeok glanced at approaching Yuri, cautious. "Tomorrow's girl... hot?"
Guy instinct. Girl eval boils to "hot?" magic word.
Jia's hot? Decent. Next to Hyun, but solid.
Like him—decent, but compared down.
Hyun? Hot, yeah. If not bratty. Face-wise, stunning.
"One's good. Cute smile, energetic. Other... TBD if joining."
"Haha, one's a win. Cute? Heh, pumped."
Seonghwan caught the spark in his eyes.
Mincheol said no dating history. Total chick-magnet simp.
Yumi crush? Real.
If he eyes Hyun, bloodbath with Hyoseok.
Seonghwan hoped Hyun stayed away.