Worries, Conflicts, and.... (5)
The stench of booze wafting from my own body was stabbing my nose. There's no way Dad won't notice. If I'm unlucky, this won't just cost me my allowance—it could blow up my tuition funding entirely.
Arriving home in a distraught state, I suddenly realized another pressing task at hand. I hadn't mentioned to anyone that I was going out to drink with friends. Whether it was Yun-su or Yesul or whoever, I was basically on probation with my dad right now, so I couldn't exactly be upfront about a "booze meetup" on my schedule.
Aw, fuck. Dad thinks I was at the library... What excuse do I even use?
Suddenly, my conversation with Yesul from earlier flashed through my mind. Me dodging her worries. Me ignoring her feelings even though I could've picked up on them. Me failing to give her any reassurance right up to the end. And Yesul, who'd been watching me patiently through all that frustration for so long.
Be confident. Build that certainty in myself. No matter who—whether Yun-su or Dad or anyone. Steeling my resolve, I opened the front door and stepped inside.
And then, "Well, well! If it isn't our nephew. Haha, it's been ages, Seonghwan!"
"...Uncle?"
There's a saying: The sister-in-law who reins you in is more hated than the mother-in-law who hits you. If you asked me who my mother-in-law was, a bunch of faces would pop into my head. Of course, the first one would be my own dad—no denying that. But ask me about the sister-in-law, and I'd point to one person without hesitation. No multiple choice needed. Even on an essay question, I'd write it down in a heartbeat.
Kim Jun-hyung.
My uncle, now pushing forty, was sitting right in front of me, face flushed red, grinning from ear to ear. I blinked at the middle-aged man in bewilderment.
What's Uncle doing here out of the blue?
"Hey, Seonghwan. What're you doing just standing there, blinking like you saw a ghost? Come say hi to your uncle. Or should I stand up and greet you first?"
He was sleazy. And sly. His habit of hitting on women had seeped into his bones—he spoke softly, but always hid some gut-punch in his words.
I hurried over and bowed my head to Jun-hyung. "Hey, Uncle. Nice to see you. I was just caught off guard since I wasn't expecting you, so my greeting's late."
"Pfft, haha! Caught off guard? We're family, kid. You eat yet?"
"Yeah, just had dinner with some friends on the way back."
"Figured a repeater like you wouldn't have friends, but looks like you scraped some together anyway. Good on you—friends are a guy's real assets, right? Haha!"
Fuck.
Everyone knows friends are assets. But he couldn't just say that—he had to drag in my repeater status, twisting it like I'd somehow scraped by to make any pals. And right when I was feeling lost about my future with Yun-su, this guy lands a perfectly timed critical hit.
"Seonghwan, go wash up quick," Mom interjected like a savior from the side.
Yes! I'd been praying for her intervention. I jumped on it. "Yeah, I'll head in then. Rest easy, Dad, Uncle."
"Hold up, Seonghwan."
Just as I turned toward my room, Jun-hyung grabbed me again.
Ah... what now?
"Whoa, kid, you're in a rush. C'mere."
Jun-hyung stopped me, then rummaged in his pocket for his wallet. Like he'd prepared it in advance, he pulled out a few bills and handed them over. "Here, I missed greeting you at Lunar New Year's. Gotta give my nephew some pocket money now that you're here. Buy your friends something tasty."
"Huh?"
His unexpected gesture left me stunned, just staring blankly at the cash in his hand.
"Don't just stand there gawking. Take the money."
As I hesitated, Jun-hyung stood up impatiently, grabbed my hand, and tried to force the bills into it.
"Young master," Mom tried to intervene.
But Jun-hyung stubbornly pried open my hand and shoved the money in. "Kid's all grown up—your hand's as big as mine now. Or bigger? Haha... Huh? Wait, you?"
"...Yeah?"
The cash was a pleasant shock—hell, I was even starting to feel good about the windfall. But then,
"You smell like booze?"
Shit, damn it.
Of course he sniffed it out. He had to point it out and draw Dad's attention when it might've slid by nicely.
"What? Booze?" Dad, who'd been watching from his seat, shot up his eyebrows and glared at me.
"Weren't you at the library? You left this morning saying you were going to study."
"Uh... yeah, I went to the library. Studied, then grabbed dinner with friends and got to chatting. We ended up ordering a bottle somehow... I only had a little..."
My bold resolve crumbled into incoherence as I stammered excuses.
The sudden uncle appearance. The sudden pocket money. And now this snitching reveal. How could I not panic?
"You little shit. It's been days and you're already at it again..."
"Haha, big bro, why so harsh? I'm just visiting after ages—don't embarrass me. Guys can have a drink, right, sis-in-law?"
"Sigh... Seonghwan, go change and wash up."
"Yeah, go on, Seonghwan. Guess your uncle said too much. Get some rest. Man, I've noticed this before, but you don't show when you're drunk. The guys in our family stay red-faced forever after drinking, but you? Saw you boozing at the countryside house back then, and your face was fine— you're the weird one..."
"Young master!!"
Uncle's words could've passed as a joke. But Mom exploded, and I whipped around in shock to stare at her.
"...Enough, young master. Seonghwan, go to your room."
"Huh? Oh, yeah."
The commotion should've been minor, but Mom's reaction was unexpectedly fierce, leaving me flustered for a second.
Why'd she yell like that all of a sudden...?
And even more shocking was Dad's face right before I ducked into my room. Shockingly, he looked hardened, glaring sharply at his brother Jun-hyung. Even though his brother pulled this kind of teasing prank all the time, something about that comment rubbed even Dad the wrong way.
What's Dad's deal...?
The heavy air that blanketed the house for that brief moment made no sense to me.
Huuuuh.
Changed clothes, showered, brushed my teeth. Through it all, I kept replaying old memories and today's events in my head.
Bzzz.
"..."
My phone buzzed with a text notification popping up on the screen.
"Haa, fuck."
I hadn't turned my phone on since before the taxi, worried Yesul might spot me, but the messages had been piling up. Even after getting to my room, I'd agonized dozens of times over whether to reply.
What do I even say? 'Yesul likes some other guy, so you're screwed'? Or play dumb? What if she doesn't reply?
None were right. Just avoidance. Fake comfort would just insult my friend.
Bzzz.
"He's dying for a reply, huh. Fingers'll break from all that typing... Huh?"
I figured it was another from Yun-su, so I just glanced at the preview. But,
"Huh? Yuri?"
I quickly opened the app to check Yuri's messages.
"Oh shit. What's with her?"
Snaps from our first wild time in that dingy warehouse. After the thrilling rush, while basking in the afterglow, she'd bizarrely pulled out her camera app and shoved the phone in our faces. I'd begged, threatened, pleaded to delete them. We compromised: any with faces visible got axed.
But here she sends some censored ones out of nowhere—and she'd photoshopped them.
Yuri was naked, I was naked, but perfectly entwined so nothing crucial showed. Faces started from the jaw down, and since we were stripped bare, hard to ID anyone. Poses like pro models topless, hugging to highlight their figures naturally.
"Sending these outta nowhere?"
Since then, our private chats had gotten stickier. Sneaking dense touches in quiet library mornings, her pre-class pics more explicit—now I spotted her underwear color before her outfit.
"Love it, but... not in the mood to get worked up right now. Why those old pics all of a sudden?"
I savored Yuri's photos slowly, then a thunderbolt thought jolted me.
"No way...?"
I frantically searched and opened the gym gallery.
Nickname: MyLoveSH. Please...
A post under Yuri's nickname. I dove into the latest one.
"Ah, fuck. Gonna lose my mind."
As feared. The exact photos she'd sent. Select explicit ones posted raw—with the "Y.R ♡ S.H" etched on.
Fuck, I had nothing to do with it, but now I'm screwed.
Truth was, I'd planned a not-quite-confession for April 13th. Lee Yeon lingered like a faint afterimage—not as deep as the old scar, but still there. Starting with Yumi sunbae, extending to Yuri, those memories of Yeon had faded. I was sure: soon I'd love one woman fully. Yuri was first in line there—no denying it.
So I'd say, Just wait a bit. Once I'm certain, I'll confess properly.
But today. Right now. Yesul kept nagging at me. Forgotten moments with her resurfaced, stirring chaos. Her looks, body, mannerisms I'd dismissed as "taken"—all vivid now. I desperately yanked those memories to carve out space for Yesul against Yuri's stronghold.
"Fuck, this is polygamy territory... Can't stand juggling two girls like a loser."
Yun-su weighed on me already, but Yuri even more. Turmoil.
"Just... a little longer..."
I chose facing reality over rash choices.
"Wow, hyung, calling us for lunch first thing? I'm honored."
"...Sarcasm?"
"Nah, for real, hyung. Jia, right?"
"Totally. When oppa messaged the group 'Wanna grab food?', I nearly cheered in class."
"Jia, don't overdo it."
Monday morning—Yun-su's texts nonstop as usual. I'd dreamed of escaping reality but ended up posting in the "SteamyKimchiRising" group chat.
Skipping a meal was fine, but the real issue: my escapism might drag on. Meeting Yuri was okay, but if Yesul spotted it? Awkward. Last night, I'd pondered Yesul's trigger.
Maybe... she's aware of Yuri?
In our group project "Modern Culture Ad Expression Techniques," Yuri and I were teammates—could look suspicious to Yesul. If my hunch was right, and she'd liked me forever, she'd notice my changes.
Keep secret Yuri meets outside Yesul's usual spots.
My escape plan—and my desire not to ditch Yuri meets despite fretting over Yesul.
Bottom line: excluding Yesul, Yun-su, and Yuri, the only bold school buds left were these beaming girls in front of me.
Neighbor little sis and her pals. Perfect.
Smiling inwardly, I glanced at Lee Hyun eating beside me.
"...What?"
She paused mid-bite, shooting me a grumpy glare—but even that looked cute.
Who knew Hyun would be my good fortune...
In a warm moment, my true feelings slipped out. "You're turning into a comfy comfort for me now. So pretty, babe."
No big intent. Just that her early-semester friend-making looked cute, and leaning on her felt nice—spilled naturally.
But the listener didn't take it lightly.
Her face flushed crimson, eyes darting wildly in panic.
Thwack!
"Aaaah! What the hell, you bitch? Kicking my side mid-meal?"
Thwack!
"Oof!"
"Shut up, you psycho. Why spew nonsense mid-meal? Comfort? Comfort? Jerking off alone in your room melted your brain? Where's this embarrassing crap from?!"
"Hey, you crazy bitch?!"
And Hyo-seok just stared blankly at us tussling.
We started roughhousing mid-meal; he panicked at first but soon watched Hyun silently.
Damn... jealous.
Hyun always cut ties sharp and quick. Even with close oppa like me, no boundaries—made him envious deep down.
Clearing his throat, Hyo-seok called her. "Ahem... Hyun-ah."
"...?"
She paused another smack on me and turned.
"You're a comfort to me too. Really pretty. For real."
"........."
He'd shyly averted eyes saying it in front of her, but no reply—he peeked and freaked.
The fiery volcano beating me was gone. In its place: an icy peak of chill wind. Cold eyes, tight lips. Silent glare.
"N-no... I just..."
As Hyo-seok babbled, Jia next to him sighed and cut in. "Can you lack either tact or thought—just one? Don't be a clueless dimwit, Hyo-seok."
"What? No, I just... got jealous of Seonghwan hyung... You two bickering and her smacking him looked fun..."
"Doesn't mean be a perv."
"I'm not—"
Jia pitied her self-invited group chat dongsaeng, subtly ostracized without knowing. Still clueless about his place, but she wanted to look out for him.
"There, there, Hyo-seok. Eat up. Want more sausage? It's fine, eat lots. Fuel up and power through."
"This shit..."
Ignoring his reaction, Jia eyed us still tussling. Looked good, fun even.
But still a ways to go.
She hoped they'd be happy.