Rejected, and a Hat Pulled Low
I pressed Kim Hye-yoon's borrowed hat down firmly over my head and stepped out toward the playground.
The moment I spotted In-young sitting on a rusted swing, my mouth opened on its own.
“Jeong Hana!”
At my impulsive shout — one even I hadn't seen coming — someone lifted their head. I watched the red glow of sunset seep into her face and sighed inwardly.
I'm screwed. Genuinely.
It was a face I'd seen so many times that familiarity had long since curdled into boredom. That much was certain — at least until a few days ago. The fact that this face, one I'd seen more often than my own and felt nothing particular about, suddenly looked different was a fairly recent development.
The second our eyes met, the corners of my mouth went slack, so I frowned for no reason and sat down beside her.
“You came.”
“Why'd you call me out all of a sudden? I'm crazy busy.”
“You don't have anything to do anyway. You've got no friends without me.”
“What are you talking about? I have plenty of friends besides you—”
I tried to glare at her sideways, but the way she was staring straight at me made my lips loosen without my permission.
Ugh, I'm such a pushover.
“Right, no friends. How are you this smart?”
“Don't smile like an idiot.”
“Don't wanna~”
I grinned deliberately harder and poked at Hana's shoulder playfully. Even as I did, I rolled my eyes and monitored her expression, careful she wouldn't get upset. Thankfully she didn't seem offended, but something in the atmosphere had sunk, oddly enough.
“What's wrong? You look off.”
“……Haah.”
Hana let out a deep, uncharacteristic sigh. In all the years I'd known her — since kindergarten — I could count on one hand the times I'd seen her this lost in thought.
“What is it? What happened?”
“It's a little embarrassing to say.”
“You're telling *me*. What's embarrassing about that? Just spit it out.”
Granted, my having fallen for her was an undeniably awkward development — but the fact that we were the kind of friends who told each other everything was not awkward at all. I was grinning, savoring that odd little pride in a relationship that couldn't be put into words, when she spoke.
“I got dumped.”
“What?”
“Dumped. Ugh, this is so embarrassing…. And here I was sure he liked me too.”
“…….”
My mouth, which had been curving upward, froze solid.
Dumped? Someone dumped you?
No — you confessed to someone?
……To who?
I swallowed back the words crawling up my throat. The confusion had me tangled in my own thoughts, but I knew one thing for certain: I could not ask that question now. Because if I heard the answer too, I didn't trust myself to keep my face in order.
But that infuriating girl beat me to the punch.
“Honestly, haven't you noticed it too, once or twice? That Ju Ji-hyeok was interested in me?”
“Ju Ji-hyeok? Book club? …That Ju Ji-hyeok?”
“Do we have another Ju Ji-hyeok at our school?”
She let out a deflating whoosh of air through her laugh, and I could only stare at her, dazed. My reaction made her look sheepish.
“Hey. Say something. Tease me at least. It's your fault I'm regretting telling you.”
“Ah… sorry…. It's just, I didn't know you liked… someone….”
“Liked. Past tense. I'm not going to anymore. Ha, I got so completely played.”
Bastard. Trash. Piece of garbage—
The curses poured out of her, raw and rough. As she went on and I said nothing, only listened, her voice gradually lost its force. I listened quietly to that wavering tone, then took off my hat.
And pressed it down onto her small head.
“Ack— what the hell?”
“Hold still.”
She jerked her head up in surprise and I pushed it back down with my hand.
“He's a real piece of work. What were you thinking, falling for a guy like that?”
“…….”
“He's probably kicking himself right this second. Just give it one more day. You never know.”
Though he'd look hideous next to you. Jeez, Jeong Hana deserves better.
At my joking jab, the corner of her mouth peeking out from under the hat slowly lifted. When she told me I suited the role down to the ground, I went “Well, well,” and wiggled the hat around — while never once letting up on the pressure of my hand.
“Ow. My neck hurts. Let go already.”
“I don't want to see your face. It's too ugly.”
“…? Five seconds ago you said I was too good for him. Brat.”
At her incredulous look, I put everything I had into a teasing voice.
“Well, obviously I meant you were too good for *him*. How many people do you know who can finish a whole bowl of ramyeon in under a minute like you?”
“You wanna die?”
Listening to her voice snap right back to its usual spunk, I still couldn't bring myself to loosen my grip. Because I had to keep her head down.
I didn't want her to see my ruined face.
Not hers, of all people.
“Cut! Ah, that was wonderful~!”
The PD shouted an instant okay without even checking the footage. Just from the way her voice shot up with excitement, I could tell she was pleased. Whether she was or not, I blinked a few times and quickly collected myself, lifting my head to find Han Seyeong staring at me.
“What?”
“……Your acting's gotten even better since the other day.”
“Thanks.”
I laughed it off, assuming it was a throwaway remark, but no answer came back.
“Have you been taking acting lessons on the side?”
“Hm?”
“An academy? Or private coaching? How long have you been at it? Could you introduce me?”
Her questions came out like rapid fire, and I shook my head, flustered.
“I don't take lessons. I just practice on my own.”
“Really? I swear I won't tell a soul. I promise.”
“I really don't take any, noona.”
No matter how many times I insisted, Han Seyeong wouldn't drop the suspicious look in her eyes. Thankfully, the PD came bounding over with an elated face, and the interrogation ended there.
“That was truly perfect. We'll split the scene into close-ups now. We should manage to finish everything today.”
“Everything through that last scene is going into episode one, right?”
“Yes, yes. Everything else is pretty much already edited. We just have to splice in what we shoot today.”
Episode one was airing this very week. The schedule was so brutal I'd wondered whether it was even possible, but once we got on set, it turned out not to be impossible at all. Unlike Director Yoon, who would retake a scene however many times it took to satisfy him, the PD of Goodbye, My Summer let almost everything pass unless it was a serious NG.
You might think that would make filming much easier. Not at all. I was hardly in a position to insist on a retake just because *I* was unhappy with a scene the director had approved. If I wanted no regrets, every take had to be perfect in one go — and that meant practicing that much harder.
“That expression right there! Haah, not overdone at all. Just beautiful.”
Murmuring in admiration, the PD looked over the footage. On screen was me, eyes crumpled at the corners, forcing a smile through a trembling mouth. Thankfully, it wasn't half bad.
“We'll intercut this expression with the shot of you pressing the hat down. Hand close-up first! It's a PPL for the hat, so mind you don't cover the logo.”
“Okay.”
I returned to my mark beside Han Seyeong. As I waited for the signal, hat in hand, the PD hesitated, then approached.
“Yeonjae-ssi, could you roll up one of your sleeves?”
“My sleeve?”
It was an odd request, but I pushed up the sleeve of my hoodie right away. When she asked me to tense my arm a little, I did — and after checking something, the PD smiled, satisfied.
“Perfect. Let's go with the sleeve rolled up.”
“…? Yes, understood.”
It was a baffling instruction, but I figured she had her reasons and focused only on the acting.
And with that, all of today's filming was finished.
“Noona, great work today.”
“You too. It's been a while since I filmed with you — it was fun.”
When I smiled and thanked her, Han Seyeong said she'd be in touch, and left with a wave.
“Actor-nim, shall we head home?”
“Yes. Thank you for waiting through the whole shoot.”
“Oh, don't mention such things. It's not too hot out?”
The summer sun was blazing, and the heat pouring off the equipment had turned the set into something close to a sauna. But thanks to Manager Ahn Jinbae, who darted over every break to hang a portable fan around my neck, it was bearable.
“I'm fine thanks to you, hyung. Let's hurry home.”
“Gladly. Oh, and — actor Lee Jeonghyeon says he's coming over on Saturday.”
“…?”
Manager Ahn Jinbae took one look at my flabbergasted expression and laughed out loud, a clear, refreshing sound. He clearly wasn't tired in the slightest.
“That came out of nowhere, didn't it?”
“Yes. It really did.”
What I meant was that it wasn't news that Jeonghyeon was coming over. It was that a man who was already in our house at this very moment felt the need to make such an announcement.
Ever since finishing his film shoot, Jeonghyeon had been dropping by constantly, complaining he was lonely on his own. I'd long since grown used to the sight of him rolling around on the living room sofa — he was there the very second we left for a shoot.
“I was a bit thrown too, but since he brought it up himself, I think he means for us to spend that evening together.”
“Saturday… oh, right — episode one airs that day.”
Our eyes met, and as if I'd given the correct answer, his gaze softened. So episode one had me in it, but five minutes at most. No real impact to speak of… was it really necessary for everyone to gather and watch?
I felt a little awkward about it, but I couldn't very well refuse, so I said fine. I'd just warn them in advance not to get their hopes up. It was a small part, after all.
“Bi-hyeok, it's been a while. You haven't debuted yet, have you? You already look like an idol.”
“Now that's a nice thing to hear~ Haha, and you've been well too, hyung?”
I swallowed a hollow laugh as I watched Noh Bihyeok charm his way through conversation with Jeonghyeon. Anyone watching would think they saw each other last week. Who would guess these two had met exactly once, a year ago?
“Actor-nim, five minutes to go. I'll set out the bowls now.”
“Okay.”
It was Saturday — the day Goodbye, My Summer premiered. Jeonghyeon had been in our house since Thursday, which was one thing, but I couldn't for the life of me understand Noh Bihyeok, who'd come sprinting over the second practice ended. It wasn't exactly a lineup worth gathering everyone for.
“Hm? The video's already up? Ah, that's the timer.”
“They're even doing a live stream these days. Wild.”
Episode one, set to go up on a free streaming site, had been running as a live broadcast for the past hour. A countdown timer ticked away on screen, and the chat window was growing livelier to match.
“Whoa… over seven thousand people already?”
“Dang, that's huge.”
Watching Jeonghyeon and Bihyeok chatter as they glanced back and forth between the TV and their phones, I tried again.
“So, about my screen time this episode—”
“We know. You have none. Got it. How many times do I have to hear it?”
“What's with you today,” Bihyeok said — but it was me who wanted to keep pressing. I wanted to ask why, knowing that, they were all gathering here like this.
I could picture it perfectly: the credits rolling, everyone dodging eye contact with disappointed faces, me self-consciously rubbing the back of my neck for no reason at all.
“It's starting!”
Starting with Bihyeok's announcement, three pairs of eyes settled on the screen. I swallowed a sigh and picked up a slice of melon.
Fifteen minutes later, as predicted, all three of us were silent. Even after the ending credits had finished rolling, silence filled the living room. It began with Jeonghyeon saying he really liked it, and stilted compliments made their rounds. Bihyeok, for his part, didn't even look at me.
I said my thanks and retreated to my room first.
Was it really that bad?
Still, it had seemed better than I expected. Of course, that didn't make it worth a gathering like this, but…
Even though I hadn't been the one to call everyone together, an odd embarrassment crept over me. I stared blankly at the floor, then decided I might as well sleep early, and lay down on my bed.
And the next day, Manager Ahn Jinbae told me the news: my official fan club membership had just passed fifty thousand.