A Pumpkin Rolls In
"Yes. I'll be right here, so please don't worry."
I was startled by a reaction I hadn't expected at all, but figured she must have her reasons, so I stayed quiet.
The woman kept her eyes glued to the floor as she apologized over and over.
"I'm sorry. I got so nervous."
"It's all right. Honestly, I was nervous too. It's nice to meet you, comrade."
"......"
I'd spoken as gently and softly as I could, hoping it might ease her tension even a little, but her face only stiffened further.
Did I say something wrong?
While I was darting my eyes around, Jinbae hyung leaned in and whispered in my ear with a smile.
"You haven't forgotten what I told you last time, have you?"
"...?"
"That there are people who really, really like you, Actor-nim. I believe the president here is one of them."
Ah-ha. Now I understood.
So she wasn't avoiding my eyes because she disliked me — she was doing it because she was too much of a fan.
It was still an emotion I honestly couldn't wrap my head around, but I nodded anyway, thinking of the singer Choi Injun.
"Madam President."
"Yes?"
"I don't have a schedule today, so I have plenty of time. There's no rush — take your time and let me know when you've settled down. Until then, I won't move a single step from this spot."
"Oh, no, I'm sorry. It's just that I'm such a... such a fan."
The woman hesitantly lifted her face.
The moment I saw her face, raised just high enough that only her eyes were visible, a strange sense of déjà vu washed over me.
"Did you happen to come to the fansign a month ago?"
"Gasp — yes!"
"Your name was... Ina-nim? Noona?"
What was her surname again? Was my memory really this pathetic?
As I was digging through hazy memories, the woman's face brightened dramatically.
"That's right! I'm Kwon Ina! How do you remember me?! There were so many people there!"
"You gave me a deer headband decorated with flowers, didn't you?"
"Yes! That was me. Wow, your memory is amazing. Thank you!"
Shouldn't I be the one thanking her?
The roles seemed oddly reversed, and I felt a little sulky about it, but I decided the important thing was that her expression had loosened.
"Then, may I come a little closer now?"
"Oh—yes. I'm so sorry! I just haven't built up an immunity to your face yet."
The president said something even more embarrassing with an even more embarrassed look on her face.
After a few more exchanges, the awkward atmosphere had melted away entirely.
"At first I thought it was a voice phishing scam! We've only ever communicated by email with your manager, you see."
"I'm sorry for startling you. It was urgent, so I wanted to reach out right away."
"No, no! I liked it— I mean, it was fine. So, you'd like to hold your first fan meeting for your birthday?"
I nodded with a smile.
Ever since my conversation with Noh Bihyeok two days ago, I'd been thinking about one thing: if fans felt hurt that I didn't accept gifts, what could I do to make it up to them?
Following Jung Hyun hyung's advice to hold an official fan meeting, I had borrowed a work phone from the company and made the call.
"I'd like to run it in a way that doesn't cost the fans any money. We've already settled that the company will cover the venue rental and event operation costs."
"Then we should do a random draw. I think the best approach would be to select winners from the fan cafe membership, up to the venue's capacity."
The president was far more sharp and capable than I'd imagined.
As if she'd never once avoided my eyes, she stared straight at me and threw herself into the meeting.
"Could you take a look at the laptop screen? These are the recent fan cafe membership statistics. It's been growing steadily since Goodbye, My Summer, but the Lukke commercial brought in a huge wave of international fans."
"Because of the Lukke commercial?"
"Yes — the dance challenge video you filmed. It blew up massively on Tick-X, remember?"
Ah, right. I think I'd heard about that in passing from the PR team.
On the app where short-form videos were the main content, that clip had racked up an enormous number of plays, and the president explained that interest had surged even further as foreign influencers joined the challenge with the same choreography.
"I mentioned it because some of the people at the fan meeting might be international fans. Of course, anyone invested enough to attend will probably speak at least some Korean."
"I see. Yes. Thank you so much for thinking of that."
Just in case, I really should study more English.
From then on, I carved every word the president said deep into my brain. She truly was remarkable.
"How do you know all of this? It's honestly impressive."
"I'm an otaku— I mean, I have a lot of experience as a fangirl..."
"I'm really glad I reached out to you, Ina-nim. Thank you."
When I smiled and thanked her, the president bowed her head deeply.
"Not at all. I'm the one who's grateful you consulted me on something so important. Like I said earlier, there's so much to prepare that I'll need to discuss it with the rest of the staff as well."
"Of course. Feel free to contact me anytime."
"And... Actor-nim. Could you keep calling me 'Madam President' instead of using my name?"
Oh. Had I upset her?
I rushed to apologize, but before I could get a word out, the president spoke in a flurry.
"Honestly, being called by my name feels friendlier, and I'd obviously love it two hundred times — two thousand times — more. But the relationship between a celebrity and a fan works best for both sides when a certain distance is maintained. It truly pains me to say this... honestly, I want to swallow my own words right now..."
With a look of genuine heartbreak, the president continued.
"People might say I'm getting special treatment, so please treat me strictly as just the fan club president. Especially in front of the other fans."
Wasn't being the fan club president itself a position that warranted special treatment?
Logically, it didn't make sense to me, but this was her territory, not mine, so I accepted it without argument.
And so, two hours packed with substantive conversation flew right by.
"Yeonjae...! You're here early!"
"Hey."
Seong Ijun came over while I was slowly loosening up before my workout.
"Getting to see your face every day like this... it's so nice!"
"I like it too."
Seong Ijun smiled bashfully, his face already flushed before he'd even started exercising.
How did someone with that personality ever become a celebrity? He was fascinating every single time I looked at him.
"Anything uncomfortable since the move? Need me to help with anything?"
"No, I'm fine. I always had to wear a hat and mask when I went jogging anyway, and it got a bit stuffy. Working out at a gym like this is much easier."
I'd moved to a new apartment recently.
It was a place I'd lived in for nearly a year, so I'd grown somewhat attached to it, and I honestly wondered whether moving was even necessary.
But since it was a direct instruction from CEO Jang, I obeyed without complaint.
The apartment was so spacious it was almost excessive, but having a residents-only fitness center made working out far more convenient. Money really was everything.
"Lots of celebrities live in this building, so no one will bother you even if you run into them! I never dreamed we'd end up as neighbors. I'm so happy...!"
And living in my new apartment building was Seong Ijun.
Why did he look like he was about to bounce off the walls?
Maybe because I'd seen An-gae make that exact face so many times, I couldn't help feeling an odd, useless kinship.
"I'm happy too. Anyway, I'm about to start my run."
"Oh! Right! Good luck! Hey, do you want to...?"
"Yeah. Let's have lunch together today too."
Even at my flat reply, Seong Ijun met my eyes with a look full of warmth.
We finished a full hour of exercise and headed outside.
"Yeonjae. Do you have a project you're preparing right now?"
"Not really. I'm just reading scripts and practicing. What about you, hyung?"
"I think I'm about to start a drama!"
His voice was light as if he were walking on air, so I asked which drama.
When I heard his answer, my feet stopped on their own.
"I even reached out to the writer directly, so..."
"......"
"Yeonjae...? What's wrong all of a sudden?"
Seeing his bewildered face, I quickly managed my expression.
"Nothing. I actually read that drama's script a while back. It was good."
"Right?! I read it and it was so good I immediately begged my CEO to let me do it."
"What role did you get?"
What was I even asking? Obviously it was Han Seungmin.
"Han Seungmin! I contacted them first, worried I might not get it, but it was confirmed right away. We start filming soon. I can't wait!"
"You'll do great, hyung."
The corners of my mouth lifted. Seong Ijun beamed.
What is this feeling?
It was a strange one. Helplessness? No, if it were that, it wouldn't feel so unfamiliar.
It couldn't be unfairness either — the role had never been mine to begin with.
The agency's position had been perfectly understandable, backed by reasonable logic.
That was exactly why I'd accepted it without a word of protest...
"Why..."
"Hmm?"
Why did I feel so damn foul?
I stared blankly at Seong Ijun. A strange discomfort was creeping up on me.
Should I have dug my heels in back then, by any means necessary?
Regretting something already done was utterly useless, but just the tiniest sliver of regret crept in anyway.
And as that familiar emotion rose alongside it, I let out a long sigh.
"Haa."
Enough with the self-loathing. It never helped anything.
"Yeonjae...? Are you upset? Did I say something wrong—"
"Hyung. You didn't do a single thing wrong. I'm just petty, that's all."
"Huh??"
Looking at his baffled face made everything I was feeling feel even more pointless.
What kind of idiotic situation was this?
"Actually, I wanted to do that drama too. As Han Seungmin."
"Oh..."
"My agency was against it, so it fell through. But hearing you talk about it now, I really do regret it. I guess I wanted that role more than I realized."
"Th-that happens...! I'm sorry. I was so clueless about it."
"It's not your fault, like I said. I'm the one who missed the chance, and you're the one who seized it. That's admirable. That's what I mean when I say I'm jealous."
"......"
At the same time, one thought came through loud and clear.
Next time, no matter what it takes, I have to convince the agency.
Whether that meant stubbornly holding my ground or finding some other way, I was going to commit to the roles I wanted without hesitation.
Of course, I was still the agency's product, and I had an obligation to do the work they wanted from me.
But feeling this gutted — so disappointed I could die of regret — had finally knocked some sense into me.
There was a good chance it wouldn't go my way, but I could worry about that when the time came.
"...You're a lot more honest than I expected. It's not easy to come out and say you're jealous, you know."
"I'm just petty, that's all. But I meant it when I said you'll do great. You definitely will."
I already knew he had the skill to back that up.
Seong Ijun mumbled his thanks, lips pressed together.
While we waited for the elevator, I imagined Seong Ijun playing Han Seungmin.
He suited it even better than I'd expected.
"I'm curious now. Your Han Seungmin."
"Yeah...?"
"Mm. He's basically a character with a lot of hardened edge, but there's a surprisingly fragile side to him too. I think you'll bring that part out really well."
"Ah, that's actually the part I've been focusing on in my practice!"
Seong Ijun's voice, which had been quietly wary this whole time, brightened all at once.
We went to his apartment, and over lunch the conversation stayed on Han Seungmin from start to finish.
Our interpretations of the character differed in subtle ways, which made the conversation all the more fun.
"Talking this out with you gave me a real sense of how to practice. Thank you...!"
"I enjoyed it too. It was fun."
"I feel bad, though. Like I'm the only one getting help out of this..."
He apologized for a lot of things, apparently.
Even when I told him not to worry about it, Seong Ijun whimpered like a puppy.
"Oh! Didn't you say you've been studying foreign languages lately?"
"Yeah. Mostly English."
The fan meeting, barely a week away, hadn't been my main reason.
A language wasn't something you could master with a few days of cramming anyway.
The real goal was preparation for the Cannes Film Festival, now only four months out.
"Th-then, should I help you study English?"
I started to refuse out of habit — I'm fine, really — then froze.
Come to think of it, Seong Ijun...
He's American, isn't he.
Well, well. A pumpkin rolling right into my lap.