044. Restaurant-Hunting Mukbang
044. Restaurant-Hunting Mukbang
I was at a Pyeongyang naengmyeon restaurant.
This place, rumored to be the best in Gyeonggi Province, was extremely reluctant to allow filming.
The reason was none other than the excessive misconduct of certain Neotubers.
The list of misdeeds was too numerous to count on one hand.
Using filming as an excuse to demand free food.
Excessively demanding complimentary service or voicing complaints.
Filming without permission and then demanding advertising fees.
Maliciously editing footage, uploading it to Neotube, and damaging the restaurant's reputation.
And so on.
Worried about the restaurant's image being tarnished, the owner ultimately banned all filming outright.
The staff knew this well.
Especially the employee at the counter—there was no way she didn't know.
She was the manager, and she had watched the owner's struggles from the sidelines the entire time.
Yet the manager did not kick Gye Se-hun out.
On the contrary, she dashed into the kitchen saying she would get filming permission, and was now looking for the owner.
"Owner!"
The manager shouted excitedly.
The owner, who had been resting on a kitchen chair, sprang up with a start.
"What, what? Did something happen?"
"No, it's not that—a personal broadcaster visited the restaurant!"
"...So what? Are they throwing a tantrum demanding we let them film?"
"No. The moment they found out filming wasn't allowed, they were about to leave quietly."
"Then what's the problem?"
"But I just couldn't let him go, so I held him back..."
"What did you say?"
The owner glared fiercely at the manager.
The manager flinched for a moment and hemmed and hawed.
Then she finally mustered the courage to speak.
"Just letting him go would be... He's way too handsome..."
"..."
The owner's expression turned dumbfounded.
What the hell was this bitch saying?
Had working too long finally driven her insane?
It was so absurd that she couldn't even get angry.
"So what you're telling me is, a good-looking broadcaster showed up, and you held him back because you thought it'd help promote the restaurant?"
"No... It's not so much about promotion..."
The manager added more words, trying to persuade the owner somehow.
"If I let him go, it felt like... I'd be struck by divine punishment from the male god who governs beauty, I guess...?"
At those words.
The owner was so flabbergasted she forgot what she was going to say.
To the point where no word other than a curse came to mind.
"You crazy bitch."
"Owner, just go out and take a look! Then you'll understand exactly how I feel!"
"Don't talk nonsense."
The owner dismissed the manager's words as nonsense.
And that was only natural.
Because the manager was always a woman starved for men.
"This bitch hasn't been able to get a man and now she's finally gone off the deep end. Going into heat like an animal."
"Owner, you're the one who goes weak in the knees for men too."
"As much as you? At least I don't pant like a dog over sixty-year-old ajusshis."
"When did I ever pant?! I just said middle-aged men are an option too! Ah, no! More importantly, this time I'm really not exaggerating, I swear!"
"Haah... Fine. Let me go see just how good-looking he is that you're making such a fuss."
The owner let out a sigh and exited the kitchen.
Naturally, she didn't have high expectations.
People’s looks were all more or less the same anyway.
She thought it was just the manager making a big deal out of nothing.
But that thought vanished like a flash of light the moment she laid eyes on Gye Se-hun.
"..."
The owner stopped dead in her tracks.
"Ah! Owner, why'd you suddenly stop!"
The manager, who had been following behind, smacked her head into the owner's back.
Whether she did or not.
The owner strode forward again with long steps and arrived right in front of Gye Se-hun.
And then, putting on the gentlest expression possible, she greeted him in a soft, lilting voice.
"Hello. I'm the owner of this restaurant. I hear you'd like to film?"
"Yes. But I didn't realize this was a restaurant where filming isn't allowed. It's not for Neotube filming, but... filming is still filming, so I'll just go to another place. It'd be rude to ask for special treatment when no one else can film here."
Gye Se-hun answered.
At that answer, the owner waved her hands in denial.
"What are you saying? We're always an open restaurant. The idea that filming isn't allowed is news to my ears—I mean, completely unheard of."
"Owner. You said 'news to my ears'... it's 'unheard of'..."
The manager whispered quietly beside the owner.
The owner immediately corrected herself.
"Ah. Completely unheard of."
"I've never hind of it either!"
The manager parroted the owner's words like a parrot, still getting it wrong.
The owner and manager wore the brightest smiles in the world as they fixed Gye Se-hun with sticky, clinging gazes.
Gye Se-hun frowned and asked the manager.
"Didn't you say earlier that filming isn't normally allowed?"
"Ah... I must have had a psychotic break and gotten confused! I'm sorry!"
The manager swiftly bowed her head in apology.
"No, and right here it clearly..."
Gye Se-hun trailed off, looking at the no-filming notice posted in front of the counter.
At that,
Riiiip!
The owner mercilessly tore the paper to shreds.
And then she laughed heartily and said,
"Haha! I told the staff ages ago to take this down, but they've been so busy with work they must have forgotten!"
"...You're not giving special treatment just to me, are you? That would make me feel uncomfortable."
"Absolutely not! It's true that we restricted filming for a while, but now we've changed policy so anyone can film freely, haha!"
Every single thing she said was inconsistent.
Gye Se-hun wasn't stupid, so he had already caught on that the owner was giving him special treatment.
But he decided to just accept the goodwill.
Going to another restaurant and getting filming permission all over again was a hassle.
"Then I'll excuse myself."
"Yes! Please, come right in! I'll show you to our very best room!"
"I'll show you!"
The owner and manager welcomed Gye Se-hun with polished courtesy.
"But don't you need a separate reservation for a room?"
"It's slow right now, so it's fine!"
"It's fine!"
"...Okay."
Guided by the owner, Gye Se-hun ended up dining in the largest, most extravagant room in the restaurant.
***
I ordered just one dish: Pyeongyang naengmyeon.
I worried that taking a whole room and only ordering one item might be rude, but then I figured—at 54,000 won a bowl, it was expensive naengmyeon, so it was probably fine.
While waiting for the naengmyeon to arrive, I kept up my communication with the viewers.
【Se-hun Defense Force】─At Se-hun's level, he just punches right through no-filming zones.
【Hottie Licker】─What an unfair world. Lick.
【Yoho】─But isn't that a bit unpleasant? Both the owner and the staff were way too blatant about it. Going crazy over a man.
【Reformed Guburi】─Your face is more unpleasant.
【Bubblegum Collector】─Wakyapya! Yoho's an offense-junkie!
"They said filming is allowed now."
【Hottie Licker】─You believe that?
【Dick Lover】─Se-hun's so naive.
"...I know I got special treatment, I'm just pretending not to notice and moving on. Since I'm not exactly suffering any harm from it, you guys should read the room and pretend not to notice too."
【Reformed Guburi】─Exactly. These dipshits have zero social awareness.
【Qkrnfl892】─fr lol. If she'd been my junior officer, I would've grilled her to death.
【Plum Tree】─As oblivious as my junior.
【BigGirl】─People with no social awareness are the hardest to manage.
【Reverse-Rape Maniac】─T_TWT_T
For reference, Plum Tree and BigGirl had also entered the stream.
They'd come in almost simultaneously while I was standing at the entrance.
I'd expected Plum Tree to demand an explanation for the ban the moment she joined, but surprisingly, she didn't make an issue of it.
She seemed to have become well-versed in my streaming style too.
【Plum Tree】─But our Se-hun knows how to eat Pyeongyang naengmyeon?
【Reformed Guburi】─"Our Se-hun." The fuck, lol.
【BigGirl】─I can't handle Pyeongyang naengmyeon...
【Se-hun Defense Force】─Isn't this your first time trying it?
"I've had it once before."
【Plum Tree】─Really? Didn't it taste like nothing at all?
【Yoho】─Pyeongyang naengmyeon is eaten for its bland, subtle flavor.
【BigGirl】─The broth tasted like water you'd wring out of a used rag...
【Reformed Guburi】─You've drunk rag-water? What are you, a rag-slut? lol
【BigGirl】─It's just a figure of speech.
【Reformed Guburi】─lol you rag cunt!
【BigGirl】─Please refrain from excessive attacks. It's unpleasant.
【Reformed Guburi】─ok sorry...
【Dick Lover】─I've tried Pyeongyang naengmyeon once too and gave up after one bite. Seriously, I just couldn't eat it at all.
"To be honest, I didn't like it when I had it before either. It didn't suit my taste at all."
【Yoho】─??
【Bubblegum Collector】─Wakyapya?
【Drift AI】─I ask a question.
【Reformed Guburi】─Then why the hell did you come here, you lunatic.
"But I figured an expensive place would be different, so I came to try it."
I thought I'd never eat Pyeongyang naengmyeon again in my life.
Because I'd gotten seriously burned by it once in the past.
But today I'd steeled my resolve and decided to give it another shot.
Trusting that this restaurant would be different.
If the ratings and reviews were good despite the high prices, that probably meant they'd figured out how to appeal to the palates of people like me who normally couldn't stomach Pyeongyang naengmyeon.
"Excuse me! Here's the one Pyeongyang naengmyeon you ordered!"
Just then, the sliding door of the room opened, and the Pyeongyang naengmyeon I'd ordered arrived.
I steeled my resolve and picked up my chopsticks.
【Reformed Guburi】─Why does this fucker look so grim and determined?
It was a revenge match against Pyeongyang naengmyeon.