The Heart That Beats in the Dark
Shin-wol tilted his head at a slight angle and looked down at Yeo-won in silence. The brief pause stretched on until her face finally dropped downward in defeat.
The moment she saw him turn to leave the room with his hands clasped behind his back, her heart plummeted. In the darkness where moonlight could not reach, something seemed to stir, and before she knew it, her hand had shot out on its own.
And to think she had even whined like a child—she couldn’t bear to look at his face now.
What kind of expression was he making? What if it was one of contempt?
Yeo-won timidly released the hem of his clothes she had been clutching and mumbled under her breath.
“It’s nothing. I’m sorry for grabbing you.”
“Would you prefer I stayed in this room?”
At the question that came from right in front of her, Yeo-won flinched and lifted her head. The man who had clearly been standing just moments ago was now meeting her gaze at eye level. When she blinked in surprise, he gave a lazy nod. It was a gesture urging her to answer. Yeo-won gave a tiny nod in return.
“Are you not afraid of me?”
“No!”
The answer burst out reflexively, far louder than she had intended. Startled by her own voice, Yeo-won flinched, then slowly steadied her breathing and murmured in a much smaller tone than before.
“…No, I’m not.”
It was true that she had been afraid at first, but lately she hadn’t felt that way at all. Was it because of the kind attitude Shin-wol had shown her? Or because he had saved her from the brink of death multiple times? Of course those things mattered, but more than that, there was a more primal emotion…
“Then?”
His question cut through her thoughts. His lips, the color of crushed apricot blossoms, curved into a lovely arc, and his somewhat sharp eyes softened, making him look benevolent in an instant.
“If you are not afraid?”
His voice, like a beautiful melody, resonated in her ears and sent an electric current racing down her spine. He reached out and gently stroked her forehead. His slightly cool fingertips trailed down her brow and cheek before settling on her lips.
As he softly brushed over the scab on her lower lip, he whispered.
His golden eyes, which had been shining brightly, were suddenly engulfed in scorching passion before quickly subsiding. Shin-wol rose from where he had been sitting and moved behind her.
Caught in a trance, she turned her head to follow his movement. He sat down on the golden quilt and patted the spot beside him.
“Come here. I will stay by your side until you fall asleep.”
The strangely suggestive words made Yeo-won flinch.
The memory of what had happened in the bathroom the other day flashed through her mind, and heat flared across her face. When she hesitated, unable to approach him right away, Shin-wol let out a low chuckle.
“Do not worry. I have no interest in bedding the sick.”
His words seemed to read her mind. Yeo-won let out a sigh of relief and slowly approached him. But the moment she lowered her body to sit beside him, he grabbed her arm and pulled.
“Wait…!”
Before she could even react, her body pitched forward. The soft bedding rippled like waves from the impact.
When she opened her eyes, she found herself lying in his arms. As Yeo-won squirmed, Shin-wol only tightened his hold, pressing her firmly against him. The more she struggled, the more the pressure increased, until she finally gave up and muttered in a small voice.
“…You said you had no interest in bedding the sick.”
“One must lie down to sleep. Or has that rule changed without my knowledge?”
He never let her have the last word. Feeling suffocated, Yeo-won wriggled, trying to create some space at her waist.
Affection was one thing, but embarrassment was another. As she cautiously scooted her hips backward, Shin-wol’s arm suddenly wrapped around her waist and yanked her close again.
“You are quite the restless sleeper. Shall I sing you a lullaby?”
Yeo-won, who had been still, suddenly jolted as if startled and shoved hard against his chest. It wasn’t because their bodies were pressed together.
It was because his erect member, standing rigidly against her, was pressing insistently into her stomach.
It wasn’t even against her thigh—it was poking right near her navel.
She didn’t know much, but she could tell it was an absurdly large size.
That day in the bathroom, the hazy steam and water had allowed her to pretend she hadn’t seen it clearly. But now, with its unmistakable presence so close, she couldn’t possibly ignore it.
Yeo-won’s face turned deathly pale as she pushed desperately against his chest, but his body was like a boulder—it didn’t budge. Instead, her own body was the one being pushed backward.
“W-wait a moment. It keeps touching me, so…”
“Enough. If you keep stimulating me, I may develop a new interest after all.”
“……”
At those words, Yeo-won quietly withdrew her hands. If she resisted any further, something irreversible might really happen.
The heat she could feel clearly even through their clothes made her squeeze her eyes shut and scream internally.
Just as she tried to regain her composure by thinking of her grandfather and Cheong-sil, she caught the faint sound of a heartbeat coming from beyond the chest pressed against her cheek.
At the faint sound, Yeo-won tilted her ear closer.
It was slower and quieter than a normal person’s, but it was definitely a heartbeat.
“…Your heart is beating. I thought it wouldn’t since you’re not human.”
A small laugh slipped into her voice. The steady, tranquil rhythm must have been comforting, because the fatigue she had been holding back suddenly crashed over her. As if sensing her thoughts, Shin-wol’s hand slowly stroked the back of her head.
At his gentle, tender touch, Yeo-won forced her heavy eyelids open and continued.
“Thank you for helping me today. I really thought I was going to die this time.”
“You should be a little more cautious.”
When he spoke firmly, Yeo-won gave a small laugh. He was right. If she had known her place and been more suspicious, this never would have happened.
“I know. There were definitely moments that felt unnatural… I guess I got a little too excited.”
Hidden beneath her slightly self-mocking tone was a trace of pity and tenderness. Shin-wol’s eyebrows twitched as he noticed it.
“Did you develop feelings for him in that short amount of time?”
At his blatantly sarcastic tone, Yeo-won shook her head vigorously.
“It’s not like that. How should I put it… It felt like I had made a friend…”
When Yeo-won murmured sadly, Shin-wol asked sharply.
“A friend?”
“It was the first time I’ve ever played around like that. It was my first time bowling, too.”
The bowling she had tried for the first time had been surprisingly fun. The entire time she played with Jae-young, she had felt like she was in a dream.
If she had lived a life where she couldn’t see ghosts, maybe she would have gone out and played bowling like a normal person. She even had the ridiculous thought that she might have been better at it than Jae-young.
“I was just so happy about that…”
Memories from her childhood surfaced—how she had been so afraid of seeing ghosts that she had turned down every invitation from her friends.
How old had she been?
She remembered a classmate from when she was still in high school who had suddenly approached her and suggested going to an amusement park. Yeo-won, who had never fit into any group and was subtly ostracized, had been caught off guard by the invitation.
Normally she would have ignored it, but that day, for some reason, she had felt a surge of stubbornness.
It was probably because one of her classmates had laughed at her and said she was creepy.
She had set off bravely, but after encountering countless ghosts on the subway and at the station entrance, she had been so exhausted that she never even made it inside the amusement park.
That day when Jae-young had taken her hand, it had overlapped for a moment with that memory from high school.
“But it’ll be hard to do that from now on. I’ll have to keep suspecting whether the people approaching me are ghosts or if they’re after the marble.”
A bitter smile spread across Yeo-won’s lips.
“…I thought I had gotten used to being lonely.”
She swallowed the rest of her words without letting them out.
It felt like she was submerged underwater.
She felt suffocated, her breath caught in her throat, yet all she could do was helplessly wait to sink.
How many more years would she have to live like this? Since she was giving her spiritual energy to her grandmother, she probably wouldn’t live very long.
Yeo-won didn’t have many attachments to life.
She just felt a little sad that she would have to be lonely until the very end.
Even if it was just a little, she wanted to go on trips with friends like other people. She wanted to experience a heart-pounding love like the ones in novels and dramas.
These were feelings she could never tell anyone.
Yeo-won pressed her lips tightly together.
When she closed her eyes to sleep, Shin-wol caught her chin and lifted it.
His lips descended and gently covered hers. Unlike usual, the kiss was slow and tender.
His tongue traced the seam of her lips before carefully slipping inside. The tongue that filled her mouth sought out her hidden one, licking and coaxing it, then sucking gently.
In the quiet room, the wet sounds of their tongues intertwining echoed. The noise ringing in the silence stimulated every sense, and the unusually gentle kiss made Yeo-won’s body tremble.
It felt strange. A dreamy, distant haze washed over her.
Even though the sudden situation should have been shocking, Yeo-won couldn’t bring herself to push him away. With her eyes closed and her head tilted, she wanted to accept him even deeper.
The sticky kiss finally ended when Yeo-won’s breathing became labored.
“Haa…”