You Are Not Kang Geon-bok
The situation unfolding now was not Bae Su-chan's problem alone.
I pushed too hard.
He should have given the man a proper rest. Should have eased the psychological pressure instead of tightening it. Hong Il-beom had forgotten a simple truth: not everyone delivers a better performance the harder they are pressed.
"I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fi—"
"Su-chan, calm down. Breathe slowly."
Despite the road manager's efforts, Bae Su-chan showed no sign of improving.
Whether from impatience at the sight or something uglier, Kim Jae-seok—who had been rattling off excuses to Hong Il-beom—strode over and started barking at him.
"Hey, you fucker, snap out of it!"
Hong Il-beom, already carrying a measure of guilt, startled and moved to stop him—
"You're fine?"
A child's voice froze him in his tracks.
"That's not how it looks to me."
"Hey! Where's Actor Lee Su-a's manager? Someone get this kid—"
The footsteps that drew near without a sound were stealthy as a shadow. Kim Jae-seok whipped around, annoyed—then froze at the sight of the child who had come right up to him.
The cameras weren't even rolling. Staff and actors milled together across the set. And still, Cheon-young was vividly, unmistakably alive.
This was a child who, though it was all a fiction, had made countless people believe she was a true proxy of the gods. An innate, oppressive presence belonged to Cheon-young.
When Cheon-young, still assessing Bae Su-chan, merely rolled her gaze toward him, Kim Jae-seok flinched and retreated.
The humiliation of having been cowed by a fictional character would not catch up with him until much later.
Having driven off the interloper, Cheon-young turned her attention back to Bae Su-chan.
"You."
"Ugh, uh..."
"Why are you so afraid?"
She reached a hand toward Bae Su-chan, who sat with his head hanging, trembling violently.
"Hhk—!"
As Cheon-young's voice and presence drew near, Kang Geon-bok—terrified beyond reason—swung his arm wildly from where he sat crumpled on the ground.
It was all but inevitable. Kim Jae-seok's coercion had been repeated until it was carved into Bae Su-chan's unconscious.
"Hey, she's just a fucking kid. A little brat! She's not even worth a punch to you. One kick and she'd be on the ground bawling her eyes out."
"Just think of yourself as Kang Geon-bok even when you're resting. Don't be scared of some little brat who isn't even worth a punch."
The violent reaction of the character Bae Su-chan was so deeply immersed in had been a matter of time.
"G-get away!"
Whoosh—
Mercifully, Cheon-young stepped back and slipped the threatening swing of his arm.
Everyone watching startled—but no one more so than Kim Jae-seok.
That crazy bastard!
He had no idea whatsoever that he himself had caused this.
Still, an incident in which his actor assaulted a child performer had to be stopped at all costs. He grabbed Bae Su-chan at once.
"Bae Su-chan, will you sit still?!"
"Unhand me!"
"H-has this guy actually lost his mind?!"
Just as the people around them moved to break up the scuffle, Lee Su-a strode right up to Bae Su-chan.
"Su-a?!"
Before a horrified Gwon Du-il could stop her, Lee Su-a clamped a hand over Bae Su-chan's mouth.
"Why are you afraid of me?"
"Mmph?!"
"You aren't Kang Geon-bok."
The moment Kang Geon-bok's eyes met Cheon-young's, he flinched and went rigid. When he stopped struggling, Kim Jae-seok let go and scrambled away, while Gwon Du-il moved in close, ready to intervene at any second.
Cheon-young gazed down at him with cool, unblinking eyes, then slowly withdrew her hand and stepped back.
Cheon-young said it.
"Sunbae, you are not Kang Geon-bok."
Lee Su-a emphasized it once more. The trembling in Bae Su-chan's body subsided.
The child spoke with a face even more prim and pointed than usual.
"You're an actor, sunbae. The person who plays Kang Geon-bok."
"Uh...?"
"You can't lose to Kang Geon-bok!"
Lee Su-a giggled. Bae Su-chan, looking dazed, managed a nod.
Kim Jae-seok dragged the seemingly calmed Bae Su-chan away. Lee Su-a whispered something to Hong Il-beom, who had been hovering uncertainly as he watched them go.
Soon Hong Il-beom followed after the two as well.
In the unsettled atmosphere, as everyone hung back watching each other, Gwon Du-il asked the question they had all wanted to ask.
"How the hell did you do that?!"
Lee Su-a's answer was simple and clear.
How to interpret that answer was left to each of them.
"That's a wrap for today! We'll pick it up again tomorrow!"
The assistant director called a halt to filming. With someone having collapsed, it was only natural.
The staff began clearing the set and the actors gathered their things to leave, but I didn't head back to the production lodging. Instead I sat down near one of the heaters scattered around the site.
Hong Il-beom and Bae Su-chan were talking nearby—wherever the manager had been left behind. They kept stealing glances in my direction, looking like they had something to say, so I decided to wait.
It was summer, but nights in the mountains were chilly. Careful not to wrinkle my costume, I wrapped the blanket Gwon Du-il had brought me around my shoulders.
"Aren't you tired?"
"I'm okay."
Gwon Du-il looked like he wanted me to go back to the lodging, but he didn't try to make me get up.
Jo Yong-jin, Ye Na-ri, and a few other actors settled in near me as well.
Wrapped in the blanket, soaking up the heater's warmth in a drowsy, pleasant haze, I waited—until Bae Su-chan, having finished his talk with Hong Il-beom, came over.
"I'm sorry for causing trouble..."
His speech was closer to Bae Su-chan's now than Kang Geon-bok's. Everyone reassured him it was fine and sat him down close to the heater.
A short distance away, Hong Il-beom sat alone at another heater. His expression was faintly troubled.
Bae Su-chan spoke to me, fumbling for words.
"I'm sorry, Actor Su-a. Because of me, you almost got hurt..."
His speech still wavered back and forth between Kang Geon-bok and himself.
Gwon Du-il's face said If Su-a had gotten hurt, you'd be a dead man, but Lee Su-a just beamed.
"It's okay. I didn't get hurt at all. Are you all right, sunbae? You look really tired."
"Ah, well, I... The director told me to clear my head before I go, so... I figured I'd sit for a bit."
Bae Su-chan dragged both hands down his face. Jo Yong-jin asked worriedly,
"Haven't you immersed yourself in Kang Geon-bok a little too deeply?"
"Mm, haha. I wanted to give it my all, but it's not easy. Before, I had trouble getting into character. Now I can't get out..."
Ye Na-ri, who had been immersed in her character since the table read, offered earnest advice.
"I've done it too, so I know how hard it is. I made something like an Acting Switch, and it got a lot better. You do a specific action and the performance starts. You do that same action again, and the performance ends."
Of course, Ye Na-ri had learned through Lee Su-a that there was a more important process that came before that. But she cut herself short. A better teacher than herself was sitting right there.
Bae Su-chan offered only a faint smile.
"I have something like that too, but it doesn't work very well. It felt like I needed to concentrate for a long time before I could really sink in. So I tried to stay focused and hold onto the immersion through the whole shoot... and it ended up like this."
He couldn't say it outright, but there had been the matter with his manager, too.
A bitterness lingered in his awkward smile. No one could easily find words of comfort, and they fell silent.
As the awkward silence stretched, Bae Su-chan wrestled with himself.
I should ask, shouldn't I...?
A short while ago, Hong Il-beom had apologized to him. He'd said he'd pushed the shoot forward without considering the actor's condition.
It was an apology that left Bae Su-chan bewildered. He'd thought managing his own condition was part of being a professional, and that he was the one who'd fallen short.
Hong Il-beom had told him that if he, as director, had managed things properly, Su-chan never would have overworked himself to the point of collapse. Then, after a brief hesitation, he'd suggested Su-chan seek advice from Lee Su-a.
She would give him an insight, he'd said, that he himself could not.
Even if she is a genius, asking a kid is a little embarrassing...
Lee Su-a was waiting as if she'd known he would come, which was even a little annoying. Still, he couldn't ignore Hong Il-beom's advice, so Bae Su-chan spoke to her.
"Actor Su-a, how are you so good at acting? You really drop into character instantly and snap right back out. I guess that's what being a genius is. I'm envious. Do you have any tips or anything?"
He even felt a wave of self-loathing at how he was rambling. Asking a genius who had no idea what it was like to be ordinary—he probably wouldn't get any real help.
Wouldn't it be better to have an in-depth conversation with Jo Yong-jin instead? Why had Director Hong Il-beom told him to ask Lee Su-a?
I just want to go back to the lodging and rest. If she says anything, I'll just play along.
Lee Su-a watched Bae Su-chan for a moment as he sat there, lost in those vacant thoughts—then she stood up.