Co-Habiting ②
The more I like you, the stronger you become.
It wasn't wrong. I just added a bit of spice.
“What the—!?”
Her face looked utterly shocked.
Like someone who finds the slimy texture of spinach unappetizing.
“You’re not scared of that, you idiot. How about it? Pretty cool power, right?”
The person who told me about the power was Sehyun for the first time.
I hadn’t even reported my ability to the Hunter Management Association yet.
I had kept it a secret, exclusive to Sehyun.
Ahem. So, hurry up and praise me.
“I like you... It’s crazy. Just hearing it gives me chills.”
The reaction came from the other side. Unbelievable.
The guy kept his distance from me noisily.
I scrunched my face in displeasure.
“I’m not going to hate you! No matter how much we bicker, I won’t hate you.”
“Then say it like that. It gives me goosebumps.”
The word “like” was chillingly embarrassing.
It was an inappropriate tone for best friends.
“You’re always worrying about everything and acting like an idiot. You man.”
I muttered while finishing my canned beer.
The slightly tipsy feeling was incredibly enjoyable.
“Then what about your house?”
“Huh?”
“Ex-fiancé and... No, that’s not it anymore. You were living with that woman, right?”
“Ah, um, that’s...”
It was an awkward question.
I hesitated in answering and checked his expression.
“You found another place?”
“That’s not it...”
“Then where have you been staying until now?”
The pattern of resolving meals and lodging so far was like this.
From morning to evening, she lounged around at Sehyun’s house,
Then from evening to the next day, she went around PC cafes.
She had been executing this lifestyle pattern for a full two weeks.
“That’s how it turned out.”
Sehyun, who heard the explanation, made a troubled expression.
“You’re a homeless person?”
“What can I do! It’s my heart!”
I snapped at Sehyun, stung to the core.
It was basically self-sabotage.
Even I thought it was a rather desperate way to solve meals and lodging.
“I still have my stuff at that house... I need to prepare my heart too... Anyway! There’s this kind of thing!”
I received a call from that woman.
I had already packed my things, so come get them.
But I couldn’t bring myself to go right away.
I didn’t want to face that woman.
“Anyway, I get the gist. So, you don’t have a place to stay for now.”
“Yeah, that’s about right.”
Sehyun nodded with a face that had figured out the situation.
I was tense, watching Sehyun’s eyes.
“If it’s okay, will you live with me?”
The words that came out of Sehyun’s mouth were unexpected.
“Even if it is?”
“Well, how about it. There’s a room. We’re not just talking about a day or two. Stay here until you stabilize.”
I had no reason to refuse the proposal.
“Oh~ Nice, you have quite a bit of generosity. What should I give as thanks? Should I use my favor and suck you off once?”
“Instead, keep your mouth shut about that.”
“Hahaha. You’re embarrassed. Between us.”
The reactions were rich, so I couldn’t stop the dirty jokes.
Since becoming a woman, she’s been acting embarrassed.
That sight was embarrassing, making it even funnier.
“Originally, what I should be sucking is your clothes, right?”
The guy scanned my outfit blatantly.
A worn-out t-shirt with loose sweatpants.
It wasn’t an outfit that revealed attractiveness as a woman.
Yet why was he staring so intently.
“Eh?”
“What clothes are you wearing, anyway? For how many days now?”
Ugh. I flinched as if my secret had been revealed.
“...You figured it out after all.”
“Then how would I not know? Your outfit is always the same every time you come.”
It was unavoidable. It was an unavoidable situation.
All my clothes were at that woman’s house.
The one who got dumped was practically a squatter.
I couldn’t even afford to check the clothes.
Like a puppy thrown out by its owner.
“I’ll suck you, so take off your clothes.”
“That line doesn’t sound very dirty? Oh~ You’re pretty good too?”
I tried to change the subject.
But Sehyun’s gaze was serious.
“You’re not taking it off?”
“Am I crazy!? Of course not!”
I vigorously nodded and resisted.
“Why?”
“What am I wearing while the clothes are being washed!?”
“Wear my clothes.”
Sehyun took out his own t-shirt from the closet.
It seemed sincere.
“That’s not possible! My body clearly won’t fit your size!”
“You can just throw on the t-shirt roughly.”
“Then what about underwear!?”
“Want to borrow my panties?”
How did I end up buried in the back of the mountain. That’s not possible.
I clicked my tongue with a pitiful look.
The beer went down smoothly in the situation of the great humiliation.
“Slurp slurp.”
I sniffed the smell of the clothes I was wearing.
No smell. That is, the conclusion that no scent is coming out.
“Look, look. You should sniff too. No smell. The weather lately is mild, and I’m not sweating. It’s fine!”
“...You’ve been working nonstop and gone crazy.”
Are you filming a horror movie? Like .
If you don’t work and play, you become an idiot.
“If you’re suspicious, try sniffing yourself-!”
“Don’t, don’t come close! You crazy bastard!”
When I approached, Sehyun flinched and backed away.
He was scared of the smell. His treatment was rough.
My confidence started to waver too.
“I, really smelly...?”
I asked pathetically with a broken self-esteem voice.
Since the breakup, I had been passing time like a loser.
While filled with self-loathing, I hadn’t taken care of myself.
“No, it’s not exactly that. For now, I’m a woman... Hey, hey! Why are you making such a sad face again!?”
“I didn’t do it because I wanted to... Uuuu... Because I hate myself like this... I don’t know what to do!”
It was all because of the alcohol. I couldn’t control my emotions.
It was like mood swings. The emotional ups and downs were severe.
“Don’t take it too much to heart. The current you is exhausted in many ways. You’ll feel better when you rest.”
My heart felt at ease with Sehyun’s comfort.
I also needed to show sincerity to Sehyun’s efforts.
“Ucha.”
So I took off my clothes in one go.
The sweatpants top slid off my arms smoothly.
Then I fiercely pulled off the t-shirt.
The waist-length black hair fluttered in the wind.
“You crazy bastard. What are you doing in my room!?”
“...You told me to take it off.”
My upper body was now completely naked.
It was natural not to know how to wear a bra.
“You idiot!”
“Wah!?”
Just as I was about to take off my pants,
Sehyun threw a t-shirt at my face.
My appearance was like a child playing ghost.
I was flailing around with a white cloth flipped over my face.
“Put the clothes in the laundry basket. And by the way, take a shower too.”
“Stop it aaaa-!”
Dragged in that state to Sehyun.
Then thrown into the bathroom like a prisoner locked in a cell.
“...Dude, you’re mercilessly ruthless.”
Even after becoming a woman, the treatment as a best friend was the same.
Was it something to be happy about. ...It was probably something to be happy about.
“Will you put the clothes to change in front of the door?”
“Either way. Or not.”
I answered Sehyun in a blunt manner.
Eventually, I became naked after taking off the rest of my clothes.
“......”
I didn’t want to look at the mirror attached to the bathroom.
The changed appearance was too unfamiliar.
That was why I hated myself even more.
No, has self-loathing been like this since I was a man.
I am a human I can’t even love.
So I accepted it.
More than the person I like,
I made the person who likes me the object of attachment.
I thought I made the right choice.
That woman said she liked me.
It didn’t matter if I liked that woman.
Since that woman liked me. That was enough.
I had to comply with that woman’s love.
I believed I could be happy with this.
I had accepted the engagement for that reason.
How did I end up in such a miserable situation.
Like a broken compass, I lost the direction to go.
I lost everything I thought was my life.
What remained was only myself who indulged in friends.
I just wanted to be happy.
Crouched in the corner of the bathroom, I was hit by the stream of water from the shower.
I felt like a stray dog soaked in rain.
Happiness felt far away. It seemed to be turning its back on me.
“Hey, Seol Siha.”
Sehyun’s voice came from beyond the bathroom door.
“......Why? I’m taking a shower as you said?”
I answered while imitating a bright voice.
I didn’t want to bother Sehyun with unnecessary worries.
“Want something to eat after the shower? Or something you want. I’ll fulfill what you want.”
Sehyun was desperately trying to take care of me.
The guy was more subtle in his care than he appeared.
How is such a good guy not having had a girlfriend until now. Maybe because his roots are as*.
Rather, it was fortunate that Sehyun didn’t have a girlfriend.
Because I could depend on Sehyun.
“Want?”
“Yeah.”
“Will you come in and take a bath together? ...Like before.”
“You, really, a real man says something serious and only says nonsense-!”
Sehyun’s figure of panicking beyond the door was endearing.
A human punching bag that was easy to tease.
“Then let’s play games together later.”
I accepted Sehyun’s offer without hesitation.
I became honest with a small but clear desire.
“Is that okay?”
“I’ve been busy with work for a year, so how much I’ve been starving for games during that time. It’s always games.”
After the engagement, what I wanted was always in the background.
I tried to fit myself to that woman.
Like forcing a puzzle piece that doesn’t fit.
The days of cutting me out and sacrificing.
It’s all over now.
I won’t go back to the old days.
I’m going to start a new life.