21. I'll Take the Lead, So Just Follow Along (4)
I smoothed down the stray strands of hair sticking out and straightened my clothes.
With black tailored shorts and a white short-sleeved shirt left untucked by about a hand's width, the outfit was complete.
The clothes the Association gives out are monochrome, so this is about the limit of what I can do on my own.
"No matter how you look at it..., stockings are too uncomfortable, so let's skip them. It's not like I even have any."
I'd meant to just casually browse outfits until he arrived.
Wearing women's outfits didn't sit right with me, but men's outfits didn't fit my body type.
In the end, the only remaining option was something boyish like this.
"This much is fine, isn't it? It's not too feminine either."
Talking to myself, I stood awkwardly in front of the mirror.
I tried standing at attention once, and I also tried turning in a full circle with both hands on my hips.
Even if I tried to console myself that it was a cute body, the only feeling I got was that I was wearing clothes that didn't suit me....
Still, I'm not doing this just for my own personal feelings. Right, of course not.
It only feels weird because my thoughts keep drifting in that direction.
I don't have to accept everything at once. Step by step, in order....
For now, I'll go with the mindset that I'm just being Peregrine for one day to keep close watch on Park Won.
[Come out soon.]
"Hoooh..., okay. I just need to go at my own pace."
There was only one way to shake off at least some of the embarrassment.
The most important thing was making Park Won follow my lead.
Let's see if I can get a read on what's really going on inside your head....
───
"You..."
"Is there a problem, Partner?"
"Do you really have nothing but those clothes? I can see you put some thought into it, though."
Inside the car, Park Won briefly lowered his sunglasses and then pushed them back up.
Anyone watching would think I'd gone all out getting dressed up, just like he said.
I shrugged half-heartedly and got into the passenger seat.
"I just picked something decent from the clothes the Association gave me."
"Hm."
"It's not like I dressed up for you to see, Partner. The only thing left is a semi-formal suit. Want me to go change?"
"No. I just feel sorry about the state of your wardrobe."
"What can I do..., I couldn't go buy clothes on my own."
I gave the silent Park Won a quick once-over inside the car.
From the looks of it, he didn't seem to have dressed up deliberately either.
Still, he looked better than people who awkwardly throw on denim or weird golf clothes.
Except for one thing. Just that one thing.
That thing had bothered me every single time from the first moment I saw it.
"Partner. From where I'm sitting, this is your problem."
"What are you doing?"
In the stopped car, I reached out and snatched the sunglasses.
When I tried them on, a sigh escaped my lips.
"It's really pitch black. As pitch black as my future."
"If you want them, I'll buy you a different pair, so give those back."
"No. When you sit there wearing these, you look so pathetic, Partner."
"No. They're important."
"Can't you do something about them? Who do you think you are, Léon?"
I turned my head toward Park Won with the sunglasses still on.
I mean, they're so dark I can't see his expression or anything.
You should see how you look right now.
"Heh."
Did he laugh?
"Partner, you just laughed."
"I didn't laugh."
"You did laugh."
"I said I didn't."
"Ah, I heard it. You laughed, didn't you? It's not even a joke. You think it's funny too, don't you?!"
He was trying hard to pull his lips up, but I knew everything.
He laughed. He knows it's funny himself, but he keeps stubbornly wearing them....
That's oddly infuriating.
"I'm confiscating them."
"They're not the kind of thing you can just take."
"What, are they cursed or something? Like, anyone who wears these sunglasses once ends up smelling like cigarettes."
"Ha, honestly."
Just as I tilted my head and glared at him, the sunglasses vanished in a flash.
Park Won put the sunglasses back on with the same hand he'd snatched them with and focused on driving.
As we sped down the road, I sat with my arms crossed and glanced over.
"Can you even see when you wear sunglasses while driving?"
"Of course I can."
"You're sure about that...."
"I've never had an accident so far."
"What's the reason you treasure them so much? At least tell me that much, so I can understand."
Park Won's car stopped in front of a traffic light.
He let out a light sigh and closed his mouth.
Well. It was a mistake, but I did make it clear that our relationship was strictly business.
After hearing that, there's no way you'd be happy to open up to me about your circumstances.
"I received them from the Magical Girl I used to be in charge of."
"What?"
"It's exactly as you understood."
The red light was speaking.
No passing.
Stop here for a moment.
As if following those words, I sat there with my mouth open and stopped breathing for a moment.
"So..., you're saying it's something a now-retired Magical Girl gave you?"
"That's right."
"Sounds like you two were close?"
"We were."
Park Won deliberately spoke in the past tense.
Half-leaning against the window, I turned over his flatly delivered words in my mind.
If he really regretted what he'd done..., could he talk about it so openly?
I don't think I could.
"What about now?"
"It's been a long time since we even contacted each other."
"Don't you miss her or feel sorry?"
"In our line of work, once someone retires, the custom is to pretend you don't know them."
"Even for a Partner?"
"Especially for a Partner."
"...."
"In the first place, Magical Girls who can retire safely are rare to begin with."
The light changed and the car moved forward.
Can I trust this man? Is what he's saying even true?
I thought talking with him would give me some kind of clue.
But instead of getting a handle on things, my questions only multiplied.
"Anyway, they're important. More to the point, you still haven't told me about your own circumstances."
"Ah. That's..., because my memories are gone."
"Your memories are gone? Didn't you just hit your head or something?"
Oops.
"Was that what you meant by being different from the original Peregrine?"
"What? Ah, well...."
"I knew your personality was too different. Who exactly are you?"
"W-wait. Don't suddenly interrogate me like that. It makes me nervous...!"
"It's not like I'm threatening you. Relax a little."
The whole time he drove, Park Won's gaze stayed fixed straight ahead.
It felt cruel that Park Won seemed to treat this entire conversation so lightly.
Someone's heart had just dropped at that question.
"Anyway, I can't talk about that."
"So you're saying you'll just listen to my story and move on?"
"Sorry about that. No..., um."
If I want to dig up information about this man....
Would it be better to leak a little information myself?
Well, there's also the matter of building rapport. Some trust has to form before the hurdles come down, right?
Maybe I should open up just a little. Only enough that it won't cause trouble even if the Association questions me later.
"I don't remember the details, though."
"Mm."
"So, um. I think Peregrine was someone very important to me."
"Were you her Partner?"
"It wasn't exactly that. But I was probably close to Peregrine."
After saying it, I felt a twinge of unease. After all, this was a lie based only on my own speculation.
It's true that I was Peregrine's Partner, but I can't know whether I was close to her.
I only thought it might be so because I said I wanted to atone.
"...."
If we actually weren't close, and I was just deluding myself about it, what should I do?
If, on the contrary, Peregrine and I had a terrible relationship..., and that was why I only tried to atone at the very end.
If that was the kind of relationship we had..., how am I supposed to live with that?
"Well, it's true I'm curious about your circumstances, but I'll only ask this much for today."
"Is this you being considerate?"
"Think whatever you like. Anyway, aren't you also making an effort to be worthy of Peregrine?"
"...."
"You don't want to disgrace that name, right?"
"That's true. I want to make the name of the Magical Girl Peregrine shine."
"That's a fine ambition. Though I'll have to keep watching to know for sure."
The people I saw on the broadcast, waiting for Peregrine and cheering for the name Peregrine.
Protecting those people's dreams and hopes is the way I can atone.
For now, I have no choice but to believe that.
Before I knew it, we had arrived at the department store shopping center parking lot.
As I got up from my seat, I met Park Won's gaze as he looked down at me from behind his sunglasses.
"I'll cooperate. With your act as Peregrine, that is."
"I appreciate the words, but I'm a little worried, I guess.... Is this also something you're helping with because it's a Partner's job?"
"Who knows. It's not exactly that."
After getting out of the car as well, I started walking a couple of steps behind Park Won.
In the murky heat of the parking lot, Park Won walked ahead with his hands in his pockets.
Looking back, I'd never really thought carefully about the situation I'd been given.
Because of him, I ended up reflecting on it whether I wanted to or not.
"We'll buy what we need and move. The original destination was the ecological park near the reservoir."
"Ugh."
"Is there a problem?"
"No...."
I was surprised because it was a much more normal course than I'd expected.
"There, time flies even if you just watch the cormorants."
"...."
"Why do you keep looking at me with those eyes?"
"Your taste is, well, better than I thought."
"You.... Even I feel a bit hurt when you look at me like that."
"W-well, hurt or not."