Inferiority Complex
After arriving at school, I ran laps almost nonstop for an hour. My legs grew heavier and heavier, my breathing ragged, but I didn't stop. I kept going until my mind went completely blank. Only after finishing did my body finally react all at once. As the sweat cooled, exhaustion crashed over me. Unlike the fatigue from lack of sleep up to that point, this was the bone-deep weariness from running, hitting me simultaneously and becoming harder to bear. Still, a shower cleared my head for a bit, enough to make it to the classroom.
When I got there, Yoo Sera was already in as usual. She spotted me and spoke carefully. "You lost yesterday, right? You okay?"
I knew there was worry in her voice, but for some reason, I didn't want to respond. "Yeah. We lost." I just nodded curtly. Part of it was exhaustion, but mostly, I just didn't feel like saying more. I went straight to my desk, dropped my bag, and sat down.
"I'm... gonna sleep. Don't mind me." My indifferent tone darkened her expression. But I had no spare energy to worry about Yoo Sera.
"Oh, and don't play anything too loud." With that, I flopped face-down on the desk. The moment I closed my eyes, it felt like my body was sinking into the floor. After barely sleeping and then running, I couldn't hold out anymore.
Soon after, the violin started playing—Yoo Sera's. A steady note tickled my ears. Just looking at her had been stressful lately, but with sleep crashing in, it felt like a relief. Right now, I didn't have to think about anything. A wave of relief washed over me. My full weight settled on the desk, my breathing evened out. And just like that, in the middle of the classroom with the violin as background music, I plunged into deep sleep.
I was deep in sleep when someone woke me. A gentle nudge on my shoulder made me open my eyes, and Yoo Sera's face was right there.
...Huh? A dream? Seeing her face actually lifted my mood a little. But then, the sunken memories resurfaced, souring it again.
"Class is about to start. Get up." She looked down at me, worried. I knew that, but I had no room to accept it.
"Leave me alone. I wanna sleep more." I turned my head away.
"But class is starting soon..." Yoo Sera hesitated before saying.
Her words made me even more tired. "Then just tell them I'm sick."
I really was sick. My heart hurt. So wasn't that valid? But I had no intention of saying it out loud. I just bottled it up inside.
Right? How do you say that to the person involved? I closed my eyes again, face-down on the desk. My body grew heavy once more, consciousness fading.
I don't know how much time passed. When I opened my eyes again, the classroom atmosphere had changed—the post-bell bustle of break time.
Break time? Class already over? And right on cue, the expected happened. Lee Seung-min showed up in our class. The moment I sensed it, I deliberately stayed slumped deeper, pretending to sleep. I figured if I seemed asleep, he'd go back to his class. Whether he was here for me or not, I had no plans to react.
"Is Jeong-ui here by any chance?" Lee Seung-min's voice rang out.
Of course, I'm not the real target anyway.
"Jeong-ui's sleeping right now." Yoo Sera replied.
Normally, that would've been enough to make him leave. If you come to see someone and they're asleep, you go. But Lee Seung-min didn't.
"Oh? Really? What a shame." He said casually, then kept talking to Yoo Sera. "Sera, wanna hear more details about yesterday's game?"
Yup, not leaving. Knew it.
"Hmm... yeah, now I'm curious. What happened?" Their conversation came through crystal clear. The content didn't matter. The fact itself grated on my nerves. Irritation bubbled up again. Staying still would just make me hyper-aware, so I squeezed my eyes shut tighter, evened my breathing, and blocked out thoughts. Like ignoring myself, I escaped into sleep again. Right now, it was my only option.
Meanwhile, in the teachers' lounge, a brief conversation was underway. The topic was Kim Jeong-ui. Some teachers mentioned he'd slept through their entire classes and passed it on to the Class 5 homeroom teacher—do something about it.
"Got it. I'll ask him why he's sleeping so much."
The Class 5 homeroom teacher nodded at first, summarizing, but then more info piled on. The on-duty teacher chimed in. "Oh! That... Kim Jeong-ui came to school super early today and was running alone. Around 6 a.m., I think. He was lapping the field before the sun was even up properly. He went in once it got brighter."
"What time did he head in?"
"Around 7, probably. Nearly an hour of running."
The homeroom teacher suspected baseball involvement and immediately called the Baseball Coach. "Morning training? I never assigned that."
"No? The on-duty teacher saw him running."
"No way the team ordered it. Mornings aren't in our schedule."
The coach was baffled. What the hell... He asked for details.
"Teachers are saying Jeong-ui sleeps through class, so we're tracing the cause. On-duty teacher mentioned the morning run. Any idea why he's sleeping in class or running early?"
The coach thought a moment, then shared his guess. "Probably taking the loss hard from the last game. It wasn't his fault we lost, but some players internalize it like that. He must've felt his shortcomings keenly, so he's doing personal training now."
"Personal training?"
"Yeah... a bit embarrassing, but due to circumstances, Jeong-ui trains for free, so we don't call him for nights. Seems he's filling that gap himself. Or maybe self-punishing."
"Ah... tough. But we can't just let him sleep through class..."
The coach continued, recalling yesterday's game. "We've gauged Jeong-ui's level from that. Right now, he's our school's second-best pitcher."
"Already?" The homeroom teacher sounded surprised.
The coach added without hesitation. "Honestly, he'll likely surpass our current third-year ace, Lee Seok-hyeon, soon. He's already better in some areas."
"So basically the team's star?"
"Yes. Next year when Jeong-ui's a third-year, it'll probably be our baseball team's peak. Not ideal to sleep in class, but... could you overlook it for a bit? Think of it like the old baseball team days."
The homeroom teacher pondered. Tell other teachers to leave him be, or make him attend? Tough call.
I woke during each break—not fully, just surfacing consciousness when needed. If I had to pee, I'd stumble to the bathroom. Lunchtime, I'd eat. Otherwise, face-down sleeping through class. Felt like chopping the day into bits, using only what I needed.
By afternoon's end, amazingly, I wasn't sleepy anymore. I'd caught up on lost sleep. I stood, grabbed my bag, and headed to the baseball training field.
Entering, I felt eyes on me. More attention than usual. Different from before. I knew it was the game's aftermath. Third-year ace and captain Lee Seok-hyeon had allowed 1 run over the first three innings; I'd held for 2 runs from the eighth to ninth. Not perfect, but those 6 strikeouts left a mark. Clips of opposing batters freezing were still buzzing.
While warming up, vice-captain Hwang Jae-uk approached. "Jeong-ui, how's your condition?"
"Eh, so-so."
"Step it up in the second half and help us out."
"Second half?"
"Yeah. We barely missed the Golden Lion Tournament, but prep well for the weekend league second half, Blue Dragon Cup, President's Cup, and Phoenix Tournament."
Light words, but laced with clear expectations. I looked at him a moment, then nodded. "Planning to get serious now."
No need for long talks. Resolutions prove through actions, right?
"Good. You'll lead the team soon. Count on you." Captain Lee Seok-hyeon, who'd overheard, chimed in.
"Thanks to you, I can pitch easy now. Got two pitchers to back me up."
"...Nah? I'm taking that spot."
He grinned. "Hahaha. Good mindset. Makes me wanna work harder. Challenging for starter? Okay, love the motivation."
"Yeah, one word from Jeong-ui stressed Seok-hyeon out. Never seen that? Already helping. He'll train extra today." As we three chatted, Lee Seung-min—the former second-year ace—watched with a strange glint in his eyes.