The Second Note (1)
“P-please go back for now.”
After a long stretch of deliberation, Vivian finally spoke.
The matter was far too sudden to decide on the spot today.
Elena seemed to understand as much; she made no further effort to press Vivian deeper.
Even that casual attitude of hers served as its own kind of provocation.
From a witch’s perspective, there was truly nothing to lose.
Elena headed back the way she had come, toward the window. Without a trace of fear she swung one leg, then the other, over the sill and glanced back over her shoulder.
“Vivian, all that remains is your choice.”
“...”
“Once you’ve made up your mind, hang something by the window that can serve as a signal. I’ll come again then.”
Snap!
At the same moment the witch flicked her fingers. The candle she had lit went out with the sound.
In the room that plunged into darkness in an instant, Vivian blinked. The witch’s figure had already vanished without a trace.
Grrr...
“...”
Three days since Kailo had left.
Even Vivian was reaching her limit. Her stomach howled with hunger, and not a scrap of strength remained in her body. She had tried to force food down, but every attempt had ended in failure.
If she were a witch, would she be able to tell whether the food was poisoned? Would she be able to root out those who had targeted her in no time at all?
The weaker she grew, the stronger the previous day’s temptation became.
Vivian made her way to the riverbank for water. Sometimes grit crunched between her teeth; sometimes the taste was fishy. Still, nothing soothed her heart quite like water drawn straight from nature.
“Hahh...”
She left her guards at a distance and drank alone from the river. Nothing filled an empty stomach better than water.
Before she knew it, she was waiting for Kailo. She had even come to accept the fact that she could only manage a meal when he was present.
Fortunately that wait would end today. Kailo Allen was due to return soon.
Thinking of him, a natural curiosity drifted through her mind. Had he distinguished himself on this expedition? Or had he cut a far more pitiful figure than the rest?
Vivian recalled the first campaign of her late older brother, Royce Rondore. Called the future of the Rondore house, he had ridden out on his first monster subjugation at sixteen. And on that very first hunt he had succeeded in slaying the leader of the goblins—a hobgoblin.
Would Kailo Allen achieve something comparable?
“...”
Of course she knew the comparison was meaningless. Royce Rondore had had the support of the vassals, and he had been sixteen. Kailo Allen, by contrast, was an outcast in the Disciplinary Unit, only fifteen, and small of frame. Simply returning alive would be fortune enough.
Suddenly Vivian realized how much had changed in the way she regarded Kailo Allen. When she had first assigned him to the Disciplinary Unit, she had hoped he would die naturally in the line of duty. Now she was the one waiting for him to come back. How weak must she have become, to lean on her enemy like this? She could not even begin to measure it.
“Lady Vivian!”
A familiar voice called her name. Vivian wiped her mouth and stepped away from the river. In the distance Scholar Crelin came running.
He said, “The knights have returned.”
We trudged back toward the castle. Our steps were heavy, and the stench of blood hung thick in the air. The cheap armor clanking against itself made no cheerful sound; it was only the weary scrape of metal that spoke for the hearts of the Disciplinary Unit.
A few of the wounded returned on stretchers; others barely managed to walk with a comrade’s shoulder for support. Valon, too, needed Willas and Martin to hold him up. My own condition was no better; I used my dual swords like a cane, planting them against the ground with every step.
Yet not a single boy soldier mocked my pathetic state. Everyone was in much the same shape, and the battle had earned me a measure of their respect.
Once we passed through the gates of Rondore, I pulled off the red bear-head helmet. I wanted nothing more than to wash, tend my wounds, fill my belly, and fall asleep. It had been a long time since I had wanted to act on pure instinct, free of complicated thoughts. My body had reached its limit.
Virgor led us as far as the Disciplinary Unit barracks and then barked,
“Wounded to Scholar Crelin! The rest of you wash up and stuff yourselves with the food waiting inside. I’d like to tell you to clean your gear and stow it in the warehouse as well... but that can wait until tomorrow. Wash, eat, rest. That is all.”
The boy soldiers of the Disciplinary Unit shuffled off to obey. A few looked so crushed by fatigue that they seemed headed straight for a deep sleep.
I let out a long breath and started walking. It had been a long three days.
Thud!
Someone caught my shoulder. The moment I saw the face of Coleman, Virgor’s adjutant, keeping my expression under control became difficult.
“What now.”
“You’re coming with Sir Virgor to make the report, Kailo Allen.”
“...Hah.”
“Follow me.”
Coleman left no room for argument and headed toward Virgor. Part of me wanted to ignore them and just go back. Yet the thought of seeing Vivian’s face after so long made me waver a little.
In the end I followed Coleman. I only followed because it was an order.
The door opened, and Virgor, Coleman, and I stepped into Vivian’s office. The first thing that caught my eye was the red of her hair. The moment she saw me covered in filth and blood, her body gave a startled flinch. Those crimson eyes stayed fixed on me for a long while.
It was the first time I had shown her such an exhausted face, and for some reason I felt embarrassed all over again.
“Virgor Winslay. As ordered by the head of the house, we have completed the monster subjugation and returned.”
Virgor opened the report. Vivian nodded and answered,
“Y-you’ve worked hard.”
“Yes. We slew a total of seven hobgoblins and one hundred seventy-nine ordinary goblins. The area near the Lios River northwest of Loktana should no longer be a concern.”
Spin.
“...?”
My head swam; the world tilted. I staggered, then caught my balance. Blinking hard twice, I tried to focus on what lay ahead. The blackness that had briefly swallowed everything brightened again.
“...What?”
When I looked up, Vivian had already risen from her seat. She was staring at me with an expression I had never seen before. It was so unfamiliar that for a moment I wondered if she was looking at something else entirely.
Virgor cleared his throat lightly, gripped my shoulder, and set me upright. I steadied my breathing and forced strength into my legs. I really must have been exhausted.
Only then did Vivian sit back down. Virgor continued,
“Lady Vivian, there is something I wish to report regarding this subjugation.”
“...Speak.”
“Yes. With all due respect... I would like to request appropriate rewards for the soldiers who distinguished themselves. Our surveillance unit merely observed; it was the boy soldiers of the Disciplinary Unit who actually finished the fighting.”
“I-I’ll prepare a banquet that can serve as a reward for everyone.”
“One more thing. For the boy soldiers who slew hobgoblins... I wish to grant them special authority as well. I intend to create mid-level commanders who can lead the remaining boys.”
Vivian nodded at that too.
“V-very well. So I should understand that seven new mid-level commanders will be appointed?”
“No.”
Virgor cut her off cleanly.
“Only four boy soldiers slew hobgoblins.”
“B-but you said seven were killed earlier...”
“The Kailo Allen standing here took four of those seven.”
The moment the words reached her, Vivian froze solid. Virgor tightened his grip on my shoulder; Coleman let out a short sigh. At any other time it would have meant nothing, yet seeing that look on Vivian’s face filled me with a quiet pride.
See that? I tried to offer her a smile.
But the world went black again. Just before my vision failed, I saw the floor rising toward me. Without understanding what was happening, I drove my face straight into the surging floor.
‘...lo Allen...!’
‘...Call Scholar Crelin!’
‘F-for now...!’
A membrane seemed to cover my ears; the surrounding uproar only hummed and roared. I tried to grasp what had happened, but I was far too sleepy. I thought I felt two small, cold hands cupping my cheeks... yet I was so tired that I simply surrendered to sleep first.
Kailo Allen lay on the bed swathed in bandages from head to toe. Scholar Crelin said he could not understand how the boy had managed to walk all the way here alone. He had lost a great deal of blood, and exhaustion had piled up until he collapsed. Still, his life was in no danger, so there was no need for excessive worry.
That had been during the day. Now the night was deep.
To Vivian, who had not left Kailo Allen’s bedside, Scholar Crelin spoke again.
“Lady Vivian, truly, he is fine now. His pulse has stabilized, and every wound has been treated...”
“...”
Even at Crelin’s words Vivian did not move. She had no desire to rise. She simply watched Kailo, eyes closed, breathing lightly through his nose.
Vivian still could not measure how badly she had been startled when he fell. In truth the whole castle had been thrown into uproar. Kailo Allen’s death would have meant the extinction of the Rondore line as well. The difference between tormenting someone and taking their life was immense.
Of course that was not the only reason she had been shocked. If it had been, she would never have harassed Kailo Allen so relentlessly all this time.
The reason she had been startled... was that at some point she had begun to see Kailo as something that could not fall. Because he had overcome every hardship and adversity, she had never imagined him looking so human. The image of him toppling like a rotten old tree was still vivid. Watching a being she had believed unbreakable finally break gifted her with a strange kind of fear. It became an occasion to realize once more how fragile people truly were.
There was no such thing as a person who did not die. If even someone as strong as Kailo could die, then the death of a weak creature like herself must already be decided as well.
“...”
But was that all? Had she only been startled because the person she believed would never fall had fallen? Perhaps there was another reason her heart felt so unsettled. Was it because, without Kailo, there would be no one left to check her meals?
She wanted to believe that, yet it did not seem close to the truth. After all, the stomach that had been so ravenous earlier felt not the slightest hunger now.
Vivian could not tell. Perhaps the bond she had thought faint had been far clearer than she realized. Perhaps, in the sight of him suffering alone, she had shamelessly seen herself. She seemed to understand it only after he had collapsed.
Scholar Crelin urged her once more.
“Lady Vivian. The night is deep. Please return and rest. Your presence at his side will change nothing.”
“...”
Vivian was not ignoring him. She heard, considered, and reached a conclusion each time.
“I’ll stay here.”
In the past Kailo Allen had watched over her as well. The image of him telling her not to think of fleeing into death was still clear. Vivian rationalized her presence here in the same spirit. She wanted to take in the sight of him struggling.
She turned to Scholar Crelin.
“Leave now. I do not need advice.”
At her firm tone Crelin rolled his eyes, then bowed deeply and withdrew.
Thud.
Left alone, Vivian watched Kailo by the flickering candlelight.
“...”
Complicated thoughts drifted as she looked at the faint cold sweat beading on his forehead. Before long, however, she took a cloth and gently wiped the sweat away. She did not know why she was doing this, yet she felt no particular urge to search for a reason.
It was a truly strange feeling. If he simply died like this, part of her thought that, too, might bring a kind of relief. Vivian still had not forgiven the Allen family for slaughtering every one of her kin. Especially if she could deliver death to the Undefeated Knight Jade Allen, she would have no further wish.
Kailo Allen was no different. If the son of the Undefeated Knight—the boy who had once insulted her by saying her family had died because they were weak—were to die first, what could be more ridiculous than that?
“...”
Yet there was also a part of her that hoped Kailo would not die. That feeling was utterly impossible to explain. Even so, it sat clearly, and far too vividly, inside Vivian’s heart.
Softly...
Vivian gently wiped the sweat from Kailo’s brow. At that tender touch he murmured as though dreaming a hollow dream.
“...Mother...”
“...”
His whisper clenched tight around Vivian’s chest. The sight of someone who had always been strong longing for a parent’s embrace was so unfamiliar, and at the same time so pitiful. A heavy compassion sank into her heart at that single word. Without realizing it she laid her hand even more carefully against his forehead.
In the boy who yearned for his mother, Vivian saw herself as well. Knowing that hardship, she wiped his sweat as though soothing her own self.
...So you were suffering too.
Vivian thought. The pain he had always hidden behind bravado seemed finally to have surfaced. Just as Vivian suffered because of the Allen family, Kailo suffered because of the Rondore family. She still hated him, yet his wounds were no longer someone else’s affair.
The moment she realized they were bound together in the same pain, the faint worry she felt for Kailo grew larger.
In the end Vivian could not suppress the pity that rose unbidden and whispered,
“...Wake up.”
Perhaps she was interrupting a good dream. Having decided to torment him, she spoke again.
“...Don’t dream alone. Wake up.”
Yet already her voice was thick with an unnameable worry and concern for him.