Chapter 184: Just Hit Me Already
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 184: Just Hit Me Already
Wow… I feel like I’m dying.
It’s not like I’m in sharp pain anywhere, but it feels like that grogginess you get right after waking up with a nasty cold. My body is heavy, I have no strength, and my brain isn't exactly firing on all cylinders.
Is my mana really that pathetic?
Look, I’ll admit it’s below average, but that’s only within Yggdrasil. Out in the real world, I’m better than most mages. If my mana pool were truly that shallow, I wouldn't be able to spam that mana-hungry Magnum of mine.
Besides, it’s not like every diplomat who uses a Gate is a 12 Zodiac-class mage with god-tier skills.
Something felt off, but in my current state, I didn't have the energy to investigate. I was just so lethargic that even thinking felt like a chore.
“You seem to be doing a bit better. Get some rest today, and we’ll check your condition again later.”
As I stepped out of the infirmary, someone who looked like a Barbat official approached me, as if they’d been waiting.
“How are you feeling?”
“Exhausted. I feel like I’m about to kick the bucket.”
“Shall I escort you to your quarters, then?”
“Um… what are the others doing?”
“By now, they should be learning about the facilities and the schedule, or perhaps interacting with our Lapenta students.”
Ah, so they’re probably at each other's throats right about now.
I asked to be taken there. The official expressed concern for my health, but after I insisted a few times, they reluctantly agreed to lead the way.
As we walked, the official started explaining Barbat’s history and culture like a tour guide. Honestly, all I needed to know was how to avoid committing blasphemy.
Like in the Middle East, some women here covered their faces with cloth—not everyone, but maybe about a quarter of them. I forgot the name, but there’s a dominant religion here, and the women who cover their faces are its practitioners. They aren't just random civilians saying, "I go to church"; they’re women with specific religious titles, like ministers or priests, and you absolutely shouldn't mess with them.
Of course, Akito eventually builds a Sultan-level harem and has tons of sex with them.
Because it’s an eroge.
What did you expect? Logic and consistency are for the birds.
Naturally, that’s only possible because Akito is the game’s darling. If I tried something like that, they’d scream blasphemy and every mage in Barbat would hunt me down.
Anyway, the locals are quite accommodating to the people from Yggdrasil, so as long as you don't insult their gods, you can live pretty freely.
“It’s quite hot, isn't it?”
“The shade is actually pretty cool.”
“Most people struggle to adapt to the temperature, but you’re quite spirited despite suffering from Gate Aftereffects.”
So that’s what they call this.
The official started bragging about how Barbat overcame the harshness of nature to protect human civilization, but I couldn't help but wonder… did they have to overcome it? They could have just lived somewhere nicer.
This place also had its own Four Founders, and I really questioned why they chose such a shitty piece of land. Usually, people settle in easily defensible places like peninsulas or islands, but Barbat is wide open on all sides, centered around a river that cuts through the middle.
On top of that, the surrounding land is barren, so it’s not even good for expansion. They ended up building walls along the river, but defending a long, thin strip of land—whether horizontal or vertical—is a nightmare. Our government at least had the sea on two sides to narrow the defensive perimeter. These guys really didn't think this through.
“Aha! The weakling is here!”
“Yeon-woo, are you okay?!”
As I entered the hall where everyone was gathered, Park Yu-jeong spotted me first, and Angelica came running over with a worried look.
I thanked the official who escorted me and stepped forward. Angelica, looking like she was about to cry, lunged at me and pulled me into a hug.
I figured the group would have split up without me there to act as the glue, but Shizuka and Chika were there too. They don't exactly get along, but seeing these beauties worrying about me made me feel pretty good.
“Work on your stamina. If you’re always this pathetic, I won't even be able to bully you.”
“Do you really have that little mana?”
“You really are weak.”
…They might say that, but they’re worried… right?
It’s fine, it’s fine. Angelica is looking at me with those shimmering, concerned eyes, so it’s all good.
“Gate Aftereffects? I guess the standards at Yggdrasil aren't all that high.”
Oh, look at that. A provocateur with a voice that sounds like it was mass-produced in a factory.
I turned my head and saw a guy staring at me with a smug posture, seemingly unashamed of his own words. What was his deal again? I heard his name earlier. Anyway, he’s a student from the Barbat magic school.
Unlike Yggdrasil, where uniforms aren't strictly enforced except for special events, these guys were easy to spot because they all wore gold outfits with wide sleeves—probably a school rule.
The Yggdrasil students’ expressions soured at the Factory Man’s words.
It was only natural. People talk about the "Three Great Magic Schools," but honestly, except for the school in Malta, Yggdrasil is so overwhelmingly superior that the others can't even compete. It’s like Harvard and Stanford looking down fondly while local state schools bicker among themselves.
Yggdrasil students have their pride, and the other schools are jealous of them. "Exchange meet," my ass. Whoever scheduled this event knowing the atmosphere would be like this needs to be fired.
“Our Yeon-woo might be a bit handicapped, but he’s still better than the likes of you. Lapenta? Where even is that? Oh, wait, you guys are Lapenta, right?”
Excuse me, Park Yu-jeong? It’s Gate Aftereffects, not a "handicap," okay?
And stop picking fights. Can't you see their faces turning purple with rage?
The Factory Man glared at me the moment he heard Park Yu-jeong’s words.
…?
Why are you taking it out on me when she’s the one who insulted you?
I pondered his incomprehensible gaze for a moment before finding the answer. I flashed a bright smile.
“What do you think you’re doing? Do you want me to cut your hands off?”
“No, just play along.”
Shizuka gave me a murderous look as I wrapped my arm around her waist, but I pulled her firmly into my embrace. With my other arm, I reached over Chika’s shoulder, my hand dangling just inches from her chest.
“Mmm~ then I guess I’ll take this spot?”
“Hey, there are people watching.”
This girl has no modesty.
With Angelica already hugging me and my arms occupied by Shizuka and Chika, Park Yu-jeong immediately caught on to what I was doing. Still, did she really have to reach for my crotch in front of everyone?
I jerked my hips back, and Park Yu-jeong burst out laughing before circling behind me to hug me from the back.
Hey, stop it.
Her hands slithered around, wandering suggestively across my chest.
Surrounded by the best beauties on all sides, I gave the Factory Man a radiant smile.
Jealous, aren't you? Seeing a "weakling" who suffers from Gate Aftereffects openly running a harem with four girls must be making your inner loser instincts throb, right?
The key here isn't to waste breath talking to him.
“Smile.”
“…”
“Come on, smile. Just trust me on this. Say cheeeeese~”
When I whispered in her ear, Shizuka stared at me with cold eyes for a long moment before finally, with great effort, curling the corners of her mouth upward. It was a smile so subtle you could barely tell it was there, but seeing it from this close, she was incredibly charming.
I turned my head toward Chika, making eye contact with the Factory Man out of the corner of my eye, and whispered the same thing I’d said to Shizuka.
Since my voice was low, the Factory Man couldn't hear what we were saying. Because he couldn't hear, his pride and jealousy were likely fueling all sorts of delusions.
Why bother racking my brain for insults? This is "Auto-Provocation."
On top of that, since we were just talking amongst ourselves, he had no grounds to jump in and start swearing.
As expected, the Factory Man, his pride wounded, trembled with a murderous glare. As his rage intensified, Park Yu-jeong’s wandering hands became even more suggestive… Seriously, stop it.
I shrugged my shoulders as her fingers pinched my nipple, and I could feel her giggling against my back.
“Hey, you.”
His rage finally boiled over. The Factory Man pulled out his stick and pointed it at me.
“Spar with me.”
So it turns out this happens even without Akito.
In the game, students who are like cats and dogs end up in a prideful clash disguised as a spar. Perhaps the Barbat side even wanted this.
After all, the place where all the students were gathered was a sparring arena.
It wasn't massive, but it was a building with a square stage in the center and tiered seating surrounding it in a circle. Seeing the officials sitting far away without intervening, it wasn't just "perhaps"—this was definitely intentional.
“Heehee~ Of all the people to pick, you chose the loser with Gate Aftereffects? Is Yggdrasil really that scary to you?”
“He’s an idiot, so I’ll take you on instead.”
Excuse me? Park Yu-jeong? Chika? I appreciate you taking my side, but do you have to be so hurtful?
“You seem to enjoy bullying the weak.”
“Y-Yeah! Don't bully Yeon-woo!”
Loser, idiot, weakling… did we really need those words?
And Angelica, if you talk like he’s "bullying" me, what does that make me?
As the four of them shielded me, the Factory Man sneered.
“Must be nice, being protected by women.”
“It’s great!”
“…”
“You’ll probably never experience it in your life, but for me, it’s just a Tuesday! That’s why I love it! Because I’ve been handsome my whole life! Every time I get treated like this in front of an ugly guy like you, it just reminds me how good-looking I am!”
“…You crazy bastard…”
Did I lay it on too thick?
The other Yggdrasil students who came to Barbat with us either hung their heads in shame or covered their faces with their hands.
“Ahat, our Yeon-woo is a bit too confident. But this is embarrassing, so I’m going to step back.”
Starting with Park Yu-jeong, Shizuka and Chika also moved away, looking at me like I was a bug.
Left with only Angelica, the Factory Man mocked me.
“What now? All the women protecting you are gone.”
“It’s fine. You can't beat me anyway.”
Why is this "Make Akito Look Good" event happening here?
Since Barbat seems to want this anyway, I might as well fight once and show off my skills to reduce future headaches.
As I stepped onto the center stage, the woman in the turban I’d seen when we first arrived approached with an excited voice and set up a barrier.
“A spar between Yggdrasil and Lapenta! How exciting. I expect great things from both of you as representatives.”
Acting like it’s a coincidence when you clearly planned it.
She even meticulously prepared bracelets that alert you when your mana barrier is in danger, just like during my spar with that Under-the-Bed guy.
“Go for it! Kill that bastard!”
“Hey! You’re from Yggdrasil, you should be rooting for me!”
“Shut up! I want to see you get flattened!”
Do I really have that little popularity?
I guess I was pretty sneaky during training. But it’s not like I never lost. I worked my ass off because I had to face Akito every time.
I don't know if pretending to have a harem with Angelica, Shizuka, Yu-jeong, and Chika acted as a global taunt, or if I’m just genuinely unlikeable, but quite a few Yggdrasil students were rooting for the Factory Man.
“Hahaha, are you an outcast?”
“You’re a grown man, and you’re talking about being an 'outcast'? You sound like a child. Let’s just get this over with.”
When I beckoned with my finger, the Factory Man smirked and transformed his stick into a curved sword.
Ooh—it looks cool, but dual-wielding? You really are destined to be fodder for Akito.
“Go ahead and attack. I’ll give you the first move. I won't dodge; I’ll take it head-on.”
“Ptooey!”
I spat toward his face, and the Factory Man recoiled in horror.
“You filthy bastard.”
“I thought you weren't going to dodge? Didn't you say you’d take it head-on?”
“That’s not an attack!”
“Are you stupid? Is there a specific list of attacks? If it causes distress, it’s an attack. Now, it’s your turn.”
I spread my arms wide, inviting him to attack as much as he wanted.
“Unlike you, I’ll actually let you hit me. Give it your best shot.”
“Ptooey!”
“Gah! You dirty prick!”
“I thought you were going to let me hit you?”
I can't believe he copied me immediately. This guy’s pettiness is top-tier.
The Factory Man grinned, then shouted that this time it was for real as he lunged at me.
And I spread my arms, welcoming his assault.
I’m going to wreck you just like I did Under-the-Bed.
“…Are you kidding me?”
The Factory Man stopped his blade right in front of me and frowned.
Ugh, stop being annoying and just hit me already. I have to get hit so I can beat the crap out of you.
This is the downside of being a masochistic HP tank.
“I said hit me. Don't worry. I won't resist, so just wail on me. Isn't this what you wanted?”
“…”
Seriously, just hit me. What are you waiting for?
The Factory Man stared at me intently before lowering his sword.
“Are you trying to shame me through non-resistance? No… you’re delivering a harsh lesson to Lapenta.”
“…?”
Can anyone translate what he just said?
“No, just hit me—”
“I admit it. Yggdrasil got one over on us this time. To see through everything and even have the audacity to lecture me…”
“If I’m being audacious, then just hit me—”
“I’ve acknowledged it, so you can stop that clumsy acting now.”
“Just listen to me for a second…”
The Factory Man nodded with a self-absorbed expression, reverted his weapon to a stick, and walked off the stage.
…Is he insane?
He was the one picking a fight, so why is he suddenly acting like an edgelord who’s attained enlightenment?
This is the problem with this game.
Characters start out as generic bullies with cookie-cutter lines, but once they get "educated" by an Akito-punch, they suddenly change and start acting all cool and profound. The Thug is a prime example.
“Now, since everyone seems to have become friends, I’ll escort you to the prayer room next.”
As the Factory Man stepped down, the Turban Woman I’d seen earlier came up and stood beside me, addressing the crowd.
I missed my timing to leave the stage.
As I tried to sneak away, the Turban Woman looked at me and whispered.
“You’re quite something. Did you hear that from the Yggdrasil staff? Or are you just that wise?”
“…Let’s go with wise.”
I did notice something, so let’s call it wisdom. Even though I still have no idea why the Factory Man left after spouting those chuunibyou lines.
“Fufufu, this is going to be interesting.”
Only her eyes were visible through the turban, but her smiling eyes and excited voice told me she was genuinely enjoying herself.
Um… I don't think she’ll harm Yggdrasil, but I should probably keep in mind that something is definitely up.