Backstage (5)
So everyone already knew. That's what this was.
Lee Junseo slowly swept his gaze across the staff on set. The director, the assistant director, the writer — every one of them had known about Yoon Jay's plan from the start.
The staff who had once grumbled about Jay playing favorites had always harbored a quiet what if in the back of their minds, and the moment they saw how Junseo's acting transformed, that misunderstanding dissolved on its own.
Come to think of it, he never outright ignored me.
Junseo stole a glance at Yoon Jay, who was deep in conversation with the director. Jay hadn't staged a proper ostracism; he had simply treated Junseo with cold professionalism. When Junseo had truly needed help, Jay had given it — in fact, it was Jay who had ended up isolating himself because of the strange tension between the two of them.
Junseo's group, INB, was famous worldwide, and so everyone adored him. From day one, people had been either warmly disposed or scrambling to get close — and Jay alone had held to a so what are you, exactly? attitude the entire time. Which meant Junseo had pushed back, at least a little, on purpose.
I'm going this far, and he's still going to brush me off? A stubborn little defiance had taken root, too.
"Hyung, aren't you done yet?"
"Done with what?"
Yoon Dojun, who had read Junseo's heart like an open book, was growing visibly irritated.
"My brother, I mean. How long are you going to make him keep apologizing?"
"And give it up when watching you squirm is this entertaining?"
"Wh-what?!"
Fleeing from Dojun, Junseo mulled it over.
Mmm... maybe it's time to stop.
Thanks to Yoon Jay, he could finally understand Seo Jihu completely. His acting was deepening by the day.
Even the agency director who had come to watch him on set was stunned into praising him — the same director who had frowned on Junseo's acting gamble and never once paid it any attention.
He'd gained a great deal from all of this. Craning his neck as he searched for Yoon Jay, Junseo finally spotted him off in a corner, a hand pressed over his mouth. The atmosphere around him was nothing like usual.
Huh?
Is something wrong with that hyung?
After Seo Geonwoo stormed out like that, Seo Jihu received a message from him.
And so Icarus made their way to a nearly empty tent bar. Even once food and drinks had been set in front of them, nobody said a word. Their smartphones had been confiscated too, so they couldn't even distract themselves with something else.
After a long stretch of side-eyeing one another, it was Seo Jihu who spoke first.
"Do you remember when we first met?"
He remembered their trainee days, brimming with dreams. Back then, the others' eyes weren't these dead fish stares. They had all been sprinting toward a debut — and even after debuting, there had still been hope that they'd rise together.
So how had it come to this? Sitting in a cheap tent bar, eating the cheapest food and drinking the cheapest liquor, either lamenting their lot or picking fights with each other. On the TV bolted to the wall, idols who had already made it were in the middle of a dazzling stage.
"Not really."
"Well, I do. Kim Yunjae, you thought I was your hyung and used honorifics with me for three whole months."
"Ugh."
"I remember it clearly. Why didn't you just ask how old I was? Too shy, little country boy?"
"That's because you look old for your age, that's why."
Kim Yunjae raked a hand through his hair, mortified.
"And you — didn't you whine about never having practiced? Flat on the floor about it? I thought you were drunk out of your mind that day."
"Ugh."
"And Cha Noah, why are you edging away? You used to—"
"Ha, seriously. Stop talking!"
Suddenly it was a full-blown battle over everyone's most embarrassing history. Amid the bickering, Seo Jihu burst out laughing.
"It was fun, wasn't it. It was good."
"......"
"Wasn't it like that for you too?"
The memories they'd built together were still there. The other members' expressions softened as well.
"It's not like I have no love for this group, you know."
That was Cha Noah. Ambitious as he was, he had been the first to launch solo activities — and even while pursuing them, he had stubbornly kept introducing himself with the group name attached.
"The group name was the problem from the very beginning. Icarus? Come on."
In the myth, Icarus glided free as a bird — until he drew too close to the sun and plunged.
Was the sin daring to touch the sky? Was it daring to dream at all? They had dared to dream and fallen, ending up exactly like the group they'd been named after — dropped into the sea.
"The truth is..."
Lee Taein picked up the thread. The reason his fan service had always been so poor: at his very first fansign, a fan had sexually harassed him. When the other members learned the truth, they were speechless with horror.
"Why are you only telling us this now?"
"I did tell someone. The manager hyung and the director, back then. But they told me to just put up with it..."
The company had never protected him. It had festered into trauma, and from then on, the moment he stood in front of fans, his whole body went rigid.
And then their past came pouring out. Kids who had left home for Seoul as children to chase a dream. Contracts signed without understanding a single clause. Extreme diets, and the school classes and field trips sacrificed to prepare for debut.
Their school days, their youth — none of it was ever coming back.
"...I didn't want to live like this either."
"Yeah. I wanted to be good at this, too."
Kim Yunjae and Lim Doyun groaned about it all. These two used to be genuinely talented. Agencies had courted them from every direction, but they had stayed for the members they loved — and that was how Icarus came to be.
"So what do we do now? We never even finished school — who's going to hire us?"
"My draft notice already came ouuut~ If I want another deferment, grad school is the only way, and when am I ever going to..."
"Hey, you win."
"How is winning at this supposed to feel good? And besides, once I go in, you're right behind me."
"Haaaah..."
The sight of them sniffling through their complaints would have wrung anyone's heart. The live reactions exploded.
Word of the drama was spreading, and just like stanning real idols, fans began to gather. Even Lim Doyun and Kim Yunjae — who had spent the entire broadcast run stacking up unlikable images — started drawing warm responses.
"Finished your little chat?"
"Yah! You scared me!"
When Seo Geonwoo's voice suddenly cut in, the sniffling members flinched. He had arrived early and been sitting directly behind them the entire time.
Seo Geonwoo wedged himself into the cramped seating. The members were gloomy, yes — but having laid their hearts open, they somehow looked lighter, and he studied them one by one.
"The group name. Yes, it was a mistake. But do you know what became of Icarus in the myth, after he fell?"
"...What?"
"The sea where Icarus fell was named after him."
The name remained. Precisely the kind of name they had wanted to carve into the public's memory as idols.
"The sea means disaster, death, and banishment — but it also means healing, rebirth, and resurrection."
"......"
"Bring this to a proper close. And then dream new dreams, all of you."
"Can we really?"
"If you set your minds to it."
With the conflict resolved, all that remained was a future as wide as the hope they were carrying again.
Their old agency, seeing Icarus's debut land far softer than expected, had withdrawn all support for their activities afterward.
That albums kept coming out at all was thanks to Seo Jihu's producing. Since all the company had to do was tack its name onto what he had scrounged together, the agency had settled into a fine, release the album stance.
( Midday Talk Show — Today's Guests: Icarus )
( NEXT COMEBACK STAGE — Icarus )
The opportunities Seo Geonwoo had wrung out through threats, persuasion, and plain scheming showed their effect almost immediately.
Above all, Seo Jihu's long, lonely grind finally shone. The content he had kept producing for the group, refusing to give up, began climbing its way back up the charts.
Cha Noah, who had been quietly plotting his early exit but had still racked up plenty of solo work as a group member, drew attention as well. And Lee Taein revealed an unexpected gift for acting.
Lim Doyun stopped appearing on internet broadcasts, gradually learning to run every sentence through his brain before letting it out. Kim Yunjae practically moved into the practice room, sharpening the dance skills that had once earned him rave reviews.
With capital and devotion deliberately poured in, the polish showed. The handful of fans who had never given up on Icarus could no longer tell dream from reality.
Of course, the moment the buzz started to build, their old words and past mistakes resurfaced.
"I knew this would happen."
The members paced and fretted over what to do, but Seo Geonwoo himself was utterly unbothered.
"Only the kind of people who live in internet comment sections ever see reactions like these. So you — go win over the public."
"Sorry?"
"How?"
The members, who had been hanging their heads like convicted criminals, looked up.
"Figure that out yourselves."
"What..."
They had braced for some grand pronouncement, and the disappointment showed on their faces — but Geonwoo trusted these kids. Even without him spoon-feeding them, they already knew the answer. They simply couldn't see it yet.
"Be sincere with people. Not with tough-guy posturing and empty swagger — show them what you've been carrying inside all this time."
Baring your emotions for all to see doesn't get you far in society. But sometimes, it is exactly what moves people.
Seo Geonwoo looked at Lim Doyun and Kim Yunjae, who still hadn't caught on at all.
With their comeback just around the corner, Icarus took to the streets to promote themselves.
And on top of everything, the situation Seo Geonwoo now found himself in... Having heard all of that, there was no way they could just calmly keep their noses in practice.
"Our Icarus album drops tomorrow!"
"If you enjoyed the performance, please buy an album! Thank you!"
They returned to the spot where they had once done street busking, throwing themselves into the performance with everything they had — a presence entirely unlike their old selves. Little by little, the crowd gathered.
"Is that him? That guy?"
"Yeah, it is."
Among them were young kids swept up in the online uproar, and Kim Yunjae knew perfectly well when they meant him.
Kim Yunjae was the member with the fiercest pride and the thickest stubbornness. What did giving your all actually look like? He hadn't understood back then. Now, he did.
So this is what it feels like — a stage this joyful.
Far more people had gathered than he'd imagined. In this moment, it didn't matter one bit that the stage wasn't a broadcast set but the bare pavement.
This was the picture he had dreamed of. He had wanted people to stop mid-step because of them, their eyes locked on Icarus and nothing else.
Fine. I'll take their pity if that's all there is. With a thud loud enough to turn heads, Kim Yunjae dropped to his knees on the ground. The other members panicked.
"Hey, what are you doing?"
"The ground's freezing. Get up."
"We... this is it for us!"
But Kim Yunjae didn't rise. He had done nothing for the group all this time, and all he had protected was his own face. Kneeling for the friends he'd spent years beside — that much didn't hurt at all.
"I know I've given you plenty of reasons to be disappointed in me. But... this is our last one. Our final promotion, ever!"
"What?"
"Whoa. Did his knees not crack?"
People murmured, pulling out their phones to search the group's name. And soon, Lim Doyun knelt down beside Kim Yunjae.
"Please help us bring our last chapter to a good end!"
"......"
"We're begging you!"
One after another — Lee Taein, Cha Noah, and at last Seo Jihu — they all knelt.