The Bumbling Heroes (2)
The first instanced dungeon of Fantasy of Galicia.
The Forest Where Wolves Roam.
In the main story, it was the place you visited to search for traces of the missing goddess Se-rin — a dungeon that unlocked after clearing an easy, one-time, solo-only instance.
Players naturally learned of its existence through the main story, and anyone with an appetite for gear farming could linger a little longer before moving on.
Which meant there were people curious enough to try party play at least once.
And as the saying goes — curiosity killed the cat.
"Aaagh! It's biting meow!"
"Tank. Can you please drop that goddamn cat-speak?"
"No meow! Aaah! I'm dying meow!"
Rewinding the clock for a moment…
Se-rin had been an old-school gamer long before she became a developer. The game she had played the longest and the deepest was Eye Storm's MMORPG, World of War.
Naturally, her experience as a player had seeped into her philosophy as a developer and director. So the dungeons she designed carried that classic flavor — especially in their structure.
The prime example was path-clearing.
By planting monsters along the route to the boss, you forced players to carve a path through the so-called trash mobs before they could reach the boss room.
Trash mob placement generally came in two flavors: monsters fixed in set positions, and roaming monsters that followed predetermined paths.
So the classic instanced-dungeon path-clear loop went like this — the tank pulled a pack, everyone else poured on the DPS, rinse and repeat. For a little variety, you might throw in a mid-boss: not quite a full boss, but an elite strong enough to make things interesting.
As the first dungeon, that classic atmosphere came through in full.
And now, back to the present.
"Come at meow!"
MeowMeow Girl, the main tank, was sprinting around like a cat chasing a laser pointer, raking aggro off every monster in sight.
"M-my mana's running out… p-please go easy…"
The timid-looking healer couldn't get a word in edgewise and was squeezing out every last drop of mana to keep heals locked exclusively on the tank.
"That crazy bitch, aargh!"
The mage — who seemed to be real-life friends with the tank — was busy swearing nonstop while sprinting away from the wolves that had bounced aggro onto her.
And the remaining party member?
"No! I'm doing my best too! You saw me crit that wolf and one-shot it earlier, right? I'll show you again, I'll prove it…!"
Instead of coordinating with her party, she was chatting with her viewers — loosing arrow after arrow with a hit rate south of ten percent.
In her prime, Se-rin would have typed "uninstall, you absolute morons" and coolly left the party. But…
"Se-rin, what are you watching?"
"Come watch with me. This is hilarious."
She had graduated from being a player.
And once the dungeon run passed the thirty-minute mark, she finally switched into full spectator mode, enlightened by their antics.
There was a certain satisfaction in watching a fixed raid or regular group execute tactics with mechanical precision. But watching a pickup group of absolute weirdos who'd just met? That had a flavor all its own.
Crunch.
Popcorn melted in Se-rin's mouth.
Another hour later.
The popcorn was gone, and Se-rin had started grinding the leftover kernels between her teeth. Fortunately, being a goddess meant her teeth wouldn't take any damage — and the small consolation that ZeroIsGood's viewers were sharing the same suffering.
This time, the obstacle was…
"This way is right meow!"
"No, we already went that way."
"I-I-I think we should turn back…"
"Everyone, do you know the right-hand rule? You put your hand on the wall and— oh. There are no walls here."
The path.
It wasn't even that complicated. Sure, a degree of procedural map generation had been implemented — an algorithm that tweaked the dungeon layout for a touch of randomness — but how complex could an early-game dungeon really get?
The four heroes assembled here simply lacked the INT to handle even that mild complexity.
Of course, the power of collective intelligence should have gotten them through ages ago, but…
"Guys, you know the rules about bad language, right? We're all newbies here, me included. I can find the way and carry us. Mechakucha kamejang super pro. Collected 296 of those things. Who am I? The god of hide-and-seek, Zero, that's who. Alright, I'm done roasting — time to get serious."
Streamers tended to enforce a "no backseating" rule, which meant even Lee Han-byul's ability to pull carry power from her audience was sealed off.
Chat participation has been restricted.
You may participate again in 472 seconds.
Se-rin herself had finally snapped and thrown out a backseat tip — only to get chat-banned for her trouble.
Even Elisha, who had been complaining about being full from all the roasting, had left, saying she'd rather go hang out with the players than sit through this.
Se-rin watched the deranged foursome lose their way yet again, bloodshot eyes fixed on the screen.
At this point, it was pure spite.
I am going to watch you reach that boss room if it's the last thing I do.
I am going to watch you shit the bed in that boss room if it's the last thing I do!
And then, by chance, a piece of information caught her eye.
Nickname:Seonyeokmeut
Classes Held:Cleric Rank 1, Priest Rank 1, Alchemist Rank 1
Classes Active in Combat:Cleric Rank 1, Priest Rank 1
…
Piety:76
The timid female priest who hadn't been able to voice her opinions this whole time.
A female priest who, in a remarkably short span, had already stacked up a Piety score comparable to the guy who'd nearly sexually harassed a goddess statue.
Lightning struck in Se-rin's mind.
A goddess… giving a backseat tip — no, an oracle — to a devotee…
That wouldn't break RP, would it…?
The hesitation lasted only a moment. Action came fast.
"Uh, uhh?"
The female priest, Seonyeokmeut, startled at the sudden voice ringing in her head and tilted her head in confusion.
Pouring genuine overinvestment into every telepathic line, Se-rin gave her fingers a gentle wiggle.
A halo of light began to bloom around Seonyeokmeut's body.
"Huh?"
"Priest, what's going on?"
"There's light all of a sudden…"
The party members murmured among themselves.
Having thoroughly seized their attention, Se-rin wrapped up the revelation in a deliberately flickering, fading voice — as if her ability to communicate were growing weaker by the second.
Then she peeled the halo off Seonyeokmeut's body and drew a line of light across the ground.
"Uh, um… I-I'm not totally sure either, but… s-suddenly there was a voice in my head… telling me to follow that path…"
A sudden anomalous phenomenon. And a sudden burst of initiative from a priest who had barely asserted herself all run. The party's eyes locked onto her.
So they had no choice but to trust her this once.
And then—
"It's the boss!"
"Finally!"
"Gonna wreck it meow!"
They successfully arrived at the boss room.
One could fairly call it a miracle of the goddess.
Clearing it, of course, was another matter entirely.
(Screenshot of Lee Han-byul looking shocked as Seonyeokmeut radiates a halo on stream)
(Clip of the party following the path formed by the dispersing halo and walking straight into the boss room)
They couldn't clear the first dungeon for almost two hours and just kept roasting, so I gritted my teeth and stuck around to see how bad it could get
Then the cleric suddenly awakens and shows them the way
Looks like some assist system for people with no sense of direction, it's hilarious lmao
Se-rin was slowly starting to accept reality.
It was currently 10 PM.
Barely ten hours had passed since closed beta launched, and yet…
"I get it now… your skill level…"
A more generous assist system was needed. Frustration might forge a man, but if a game piled on too much of it, players wouldn't overcome it — they'd just quit.
Further subdividing the difficulty so that challenges came with fair rewards, and letting light users enjoy the game at their own level, was important work too.
But this was also her first time properly leveraging a full virtual-reality environment, so this was just another part of the trial-and-error process.
"Time to rest a bit…"
Having keenly experienced that even a goddess's mental fortitude could crack, Se-rin decided to grant herself a break after the long day.
Ever since closed beta began, time in the continent of Galicia and on Earth had been flowing in sync.
Whoosh!
Figuring she might as well shed the goddess robes that had been hanging off her all day, Se-rin returned to Earth.
Growl…
"Ugh."
On Earth she was still no different from a human, so hunger hit her all at once — but that actually made Se-rin a little happier.
Going without eating, drinking, or sleeping for too long left her feeling like her humanity was slowly wearing away. She needed to refill it somehow, even like this.
So, thinking she might as well order delivery, Se-rin fished around in her pocket and pulled out her smartphone.
And froze.
"Huh…?"
What she held was the smartphone registered under Kim Ji-hyun's name.
And on it…
An avalanche of unread messages was pouring in.
"…What the hell?"