The Weight of "Nothingness"
From the old woman's muttered words, an ominous weight hung in the air. Woojin asked cautiously.
"Nothing?"
"Just as it sounds. If you fail to fulfill the contract, everything turns to nothingness."
"It sounds like you're saying there was once an actor named Baek Woojin... but in the end, there never was."
"Heh heh heh. It's a simple, natural truth. This new life was created through a contract from the start—it must follow its course, don't you think?"
"……."
Woojin was at a loss for words. Thinking it over, he'd almost forgotten amid his busy days. The fundamental premise of this current life was that it had been granted through a contract with some unknown entity... no, with the grandmother standing right before him.
The old woman's low voice continued. "Heh heh heh. No need to worry, my child. It doesn't mean the existence of Baek Woojin will vanish."
"So the existence remains, but something else disappears?"
"That's right. Everything you experienced and remembered in this life will be as if it never happened."
Only the experiences from this life would vanish, while the 'self' remained intact... Wait, something felt off about that. In other words,
"Does that mean... I'd go back to being the Baek Woojin from my original life?"
Woojin's trembling voice settled quietly in the old woman's ear. In response,
"Heh heh heh."
She simply stared at his face, saying nothing.
"……."
Anyone could see that silence as affirmation. 'Ah...!' A sigh escaped him involuntarily.
Soon after, "Heh heh heh. Do you remember the day we first met, this old one and you?"
She spoke again. Woojin nodded. How could he forget that night? It wasn't just because a miracle had occurred. It was the day despair had overwhelmed him so completely—the first time in his life he'd wanted to abandon acting, his everything—and he'd even resolved to do so. That made the memory burn even sharper in his mind.
The more he recalled it, the more a desperate refusal to return to that time filled his heart. Imagining going back to that Baek Woojin without these current memories was horrifying. The original Baek Woojin, after that day, would have lived a life where the words 'actor' and 'acting' were erased entirely. It would be a hollow shell of a man, alive on the outside but dead within.
"Yes, I remember it vividly."
"Recall it. How does it feel?"
"It might sound extreme, but it's a memory I'd rip out of my brain if I could."
Woojin met her gaze squarely as he answered.
"Our meeting meant that much to you? Heh heh heh."
"Ah, no! I mean... the moments before I ran into you that day."
"Heh heh heh. I know. Just teasing."
Even now, jokes... As Woojin drew a short breath to sigh,
"Heh heh heh. Is it because your current self is the polar opposite of that pitiful original you?"
The old woman's blunt question struck him like a blow.
"You've tasted fame and fortune you never had before. Why would you want to go back? Heh heh heh."
"……!"
Her words hit hard. Woojin's expression hardened without him realizing.
"It's not about what you mentioned, Grandmother!"
He gritted his teeth and shouted. The old woman's eyes fixed on the bristling Woojin.
"Money and fame mean nothing to me. Take them back right now if you want. I have no greed or attachment to them."
"Then what is it?"
"...Acting."
Her eyes flashed.
"In my original life, no matter how hard I struggled, I could never do acting properly... But now I can do it freely, so I don't want to go back."
Woojin swallowed dryly and added,
"For 15 years, I went to 500 auditions, trying my best, but I never grasped that one chance... I just couldn't reach it. I don't want to return to a life where that damned opportunity never came."
There wasn't a flicker of doubt in his eyes. The old woman, gazing steadily into Woojin's eyes, saw her wide eyes crinkle into a smile. A satisfied aura emanated from the laugh lines around her eyes.
"Heh heh heh. I knew you'd say that."
"Pardon...?"
"Didn't this old one tell you I've been watching you for 1,123 days? Heh heh heh."
She chuckled slyly.
"I already know how madly devoted you are to acting—how you don't get swayed by riches or fame."
"Then why...?"
"I wanted to confirm it myself. Isn't that why you dive into the virtual world each time—to experience and verify the script analysis you've done?"
"Yes..."
"Thinking is one thing; seeing and hearing it firsthand is another. Isn't that what you said?"
Ding. A faint smile finally touched Woojin's lips. Embarrassment flooded in belatedly.
"Ah..."
Woojin let out a sigh of a different kind, and the old woman shrugged her frail shoulders. She's so sincere... unpredictable as a rugby ball, this mischievous grandmother. The thought of Teacher Lee Jae-soon flashed through his mind, unbidden.
"Heh heh heh."
"No more teasing, Grandmother..."
Woojin whispered with a pout. The old woman waved it off in reply, then sobered.
"Don't dismiss it as mere jest. This old one needed your sincerity."
Another meaningful statement slipped from her lips. Woojin wiped the smile from his face and turned serious once more.
"Your words, born from that clear, upright gaze and heart matching what I've observed all this time—they ring true. But human hearts can change anytime, so I can't fully rest easy."
"I won't change. I'll diligently complete the remaining missions. You're the benefactor who gave me the chance to act, so I'll do my part."
"Heh heh heh. I hope so..."
The old woman trailed off. It felt like she'd stopped herself from saying more.
What is this lingering unease? She'd watched him for three years—why no full trust?
"Heh heh heh. It's not that I don't trust you."
She must have mind-reading powers; I've been thinking it since earlier.
"Didn't I mention your nine predecessors?"
"Yes."
"Some reacted just like you, of course. Vowing never to change, to repay the grace, and so on. Plenty spoke beautifully."
The old woman spoke of those who'd come before. All who regressed via the diary completed missions initially, and by 20-30% progress, they'd established themselves as successful actors. The diary's gifts were priceless to any performer—turning an ordinary person into a skilled actor instantly. Failing with it would be absurd.
The problem was...
"That's where it ended. No further progress."
"What? Why?!"
"How should this old one know?"
She gave a wry smile and continued.
"Remember when I said you were the fastest? Shall I tell you why?"
Before he could answer, she explained.
"You're the first."
"Pardon?!"
"The first contractor to reunite with this old one. Out of ten, you're the first."
No one before reached 50%? Woojin's eyes widened.
"You're the most trustworthy contractor I've had, but that's why I had to tease you just now."
"All nine failures stemming from one cause... Amazing. So they're all..."
"Living the barren lives you said you'd never return to—the originals without that chance."
"It makes perfect sense. Thank you, Grandmother."
Woojin bowed deeply. He appreciated her honesty, even on unnecessary details. A warning not to lose one's essence despite success via the diary—and it fueled his acting passion further. He had no such intentions anyway.
"Grandmother, one more question?"
"Speak."
"I understand if the contract fails, everything returns to nothing. I'd lose all memories and revert to the 35-year-old nameless actor Baek Woojin. But those are losses from my perspective..."
Woojin posed a razor-sharp question.
"What about the impact on you?"
It pierced to the core, startling her.
"Heh heh heh. Just like I've watched, checking every detail meticulously. You must know exactly how your roles felt."
She chuckled heartily, her wrinkled lips moving.
"You lose your memories, and this old one..."
She uttered three stark words. An immense pressure emanated from her presence once more.
A single drop of sweat trickled down the back of Woojin's neck with a soft slide.
The very next day, after swimming through the sea of information beyond the diary, entertainment news portals were flooded with articles.
tvKR's Wednesday-Thursday miniseries Justice drew its curtain with a dazzling finale. The last episode clocked 35.6% ratings, proving Woojin's nickname "The Trailblazer" still held true.
With Justice's triumph, a new trend brewed in broadcasting: cable dramas surpassing terrestrial networks' averages. This shattered the old notion that cable always lagged behind, erasing unspoken hierarchies among channels.
And the pivotal benchmark in this shift? 2010's tvKR .
A syndrome meant industry insiders and audiences alike felt the buzz. The renewed scramble for Baek Woojin castings burned hotter than ever.
"...The chains that kept this old one from appearing and sharing info sooner—you broke them. Now I can appear before you anytime. Not just today—call on me whenever questions arise."
"……."
Woojin lay on the sofa, replaying last night's talk with the old woman. Her every word flashed through his mind. Lost in thought while staring at the diary for a while, he
tap.
soon picked up his phone.
"Yes, this is Baek Woojin. I have something to discuss."
He sat up.