A Stubborn Heart
By the time Bai Jingyan returned to Qinghui Garden, changed her clothes, and made her way back to the Fifth Madame's courtyard, Madame Jie had already come out of the birthing chamber.
Having seen the baby's face with her own eyes, Nanny Zhang boarded a carriage and returned to the Imperial Nunnery to give her report to the Grand Princess.
By now, the Fifth Madame was leaning against the headrest of her bed, sipping her lactation soup in small mouthfuls.
Lady Yu glanced once at the deeply sleeping infant, then stepped onto the footstool of hongmu wood and settled herself on the edge of the bed, her gaze settling on the bowl of soup in Madame Jie's hands.
"You truly mean to nurse the child yourself?"
Though she had only just given birth, Madame Jie was in fine condition. She turned a smiling face toward her daughter sleeping at her side, and a soft smile bloomed across her features.
It was a grace bestowed by heaven. Though her husband and two sons had all been taken from her, heaven had sent her this darling little girl in their stead.
"Yes. After all, this child is all I have left now, for the rest of my life. I want to do everything for her with my own hands."
With the rims of her eyes reddened, Madame Jie bowed her head and took a few sips of the tasteless soup. Then, with a slight crease between her brows, she steeled herself against the discomfort and drank a few more.
When a servant outside announced that the eldest, second, fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh young ladies had all arrived, Madame Jie passed the bowl to Nanny Di and dabbed her mouth with a handkerchief.
After offering her greetings, Bai Jingyan gazed at her eighth little sister sleeping soundly beside the Fifth Madame. Then, smiling, she told Chun Tao to set the gem-studded golden rattle — her gift to the newborn — beside the child. Her eyes brimming with tenderness as she looked upon the tiny life, she spoke softly.
"Little Eighth. I'm your eldest sister. Thank you for coming safely to the Bai family."
Bai Jinxiu, too, laid down her congratulatory gift with a smile, studying the newborn with grave attention.
"She's so precious and beautiful."
"Her nose looks just like the Fifth Madame's!"
The fifth young lady, Bai Jinshao, laughed as she looked toward her twin sister, Bai Jinhua.
"Doesn't it?"
The seventh young lady, Bai Jinse, peered at the baby for a long while before speaking up.
"I think her mouth looks like Fifth Uncle's."
"I don't know about that. However long I look, all I see is a little monkey."
Bai Jinchi stared for a good long time before delivering her verdict.
The Third Madame, Lady Li, marched over to her daughter, gave the girl's forehead a forceful push with her finger, and shot her a glare.
"All babies look like this the moment they're born. She's far prettier than you were! When you came into this world you were all wrinkled and dusky — a genuine monkey if there ever was one."
"Mother, how could you say such a thing!"
Bai Jinchi flushed scarlet.
Seeing her daughter's fury, the Third Madame could not hold back — she covered her mouth with her handkerchief and burst out laughing.
A gentle smile suffused Bai Jingyan's face.
The Fifth Madame, wearing a faint smile, looked upon the composed and gentle Bai Jingyan and spoke in a small voice.
"I wish to name this child Bai Wanjing. So that she may grow up sturdy and strong, like her eldest sister. And so she may become a person as fine as her uncles."
Bai Jingyan started in surprise. She would readily admit that her younger brothers were all fine men, but she had never imagined that in the Fifth Madame's eyes she was someone so firm and unyielding.
Lady Dong stroked Bai Jingyan's hair.
"Before you and Jinchi came home, your Fifth Madame told us she was thinking of this."
Bai Jingyan nodded. Then she bent her head and gazed at Bai Wanjing, the baby smacking her tiny lips in her sleep.
"If Fifth Madame likes it, then I like it too."
Bai Jinxiu leaned down with a smile to look at Bai Wanjing as she smacked her lips.
"Wanjing, I'm your second sister."
"And I'm your fourth sister!"
The seventh young lady, Bai Jinse, who had sprawled herself across the foot of the bed, prodded at the pink-swaddled newborn's face with her small fingers.
"At last I'm not the youngest anymore!"
It seemed as though the heavy shadow that had hung over the Bai household was fading away with the birth of the eighth little sister. The warm, amber glow of the lamps filled the room, and for the first time in a long while, the people of the Bai family laughed brightly as they talked.
Early the next morning, word spread throughout all of Dadu that the Fifth Madame of the Bai family had borne a daughter.
The first to arrive were the Jie family, the Fifth Madame's own kin. Not only Lady Jie's two sisters-in-law, but her brother himself came in person.
Yet the brother of the Fifth Madame did not enter the courtyard at all; he was being received in the study at the front of the residence.
After a while, Old Taijun Jie wiped her tears with a handkerchief, tucked a blanket around Madame Jie, and earnestly admonished her daughter to rest well. Then she took her two daughters-in-law and withdrew from the room together with Lady Dong.
Old Taijun Jie clasped Lady Dong's hands, a smile upon her face.
"Madam, I would like a word with you in private. Might I impose upon you for a cup of tea at your quarters?"
Lady Dong was a perceptive woman. Whatever the Taijun wished to discuss, it would surely concern Madame Jie.
"How could one such as you, Taijun, ever need to ask for tea? If it would not trouble you, please allow me to escort you to my courtyard. The honor would be entirely mine."
Lady Dong replied in a soft voice, with a manner neither excessively humble nor proud, while never once losing the kindly warmth owed to an elder.
Smiling, she led Old Taijun Jie and her two daughters-in-law toward the courtyard. Nanny Jin served the tea, but the Taijun did not touch it; lowering herself to the utmost degree of deference, she begged Lady Dong to send the servants away.
Only then did Lady Dong understand. So she wanted the letter of repudiation.
Every man of the Bai family was gone; as the eldest daughter-in-law, Lady Dong now decided the household's affairs. Aside from the Grand Princess, she alone held the authority to do so.
Only Lady Dong and Old Taijun Jie remained in the room. Nanny Jin escorted the Taijun's two daughters-in-law outside and served them tea in the outer chamber.
Before she could even begin, tears spilled down Old Taijun Jie's cheeks.
"Madam, the reason I so shamelessly asked to speak with you alone is this — I have come to beg you to release my daughter with a letter of repudiation."
Just as she'd thought. Lady Dong kept her gentle smile throughout, waiting for the old woman to go on.
"Do not think me heartless. My own son and daughter are all I have in this world, and ever since I sent my youngest away in marriage, I have lived in constant dread. All this time I dared not breathe a word, for the child carried the blood of the Bai family in her womb — but now she has given birth, and I ask you, please, let me bring her home."
Lady Dong's own mother, Old Taijun Dong, had likewise wished her to return to her maiden home. Any mother worries for her child. As a daughter, and as a mother herself, Lady Dong could understand Old Taijun Jie a hundred times over.
She asked in a quiet voice.
"Taijun... is this the wish of my fifth sister-in-law herself?"
She asked even though she already knew it was not.
Old Taijun Jie shook her head.
"That foolish girl will not listen to reason. But she is still so young — can she truly live alone like this for the rest of her days? It would be as good as taking my life. Before coming here, I already discussed the matter with my son. We need none of the dowry she brought into the Bai family. If you will simply let us raise Wanjing in the Jie household, we will never forget that kindness for as long as we live.
But if the Bai family cannot send Wanjing to the Jie household, then I shall leave my daughter's entire dowry to my poor little granddaughter! If, when she has grown, my granddaughter wishes to keep ties with the Jie family, I will gladly treat her family as my own in-laws, and I will cherish that child and give her everything I could never give her mother. But if — if the child cannot accept this grandmother of hers — then this stubborn old heart will simply have to pretend she does not exist in this world!"
With those words, Old Taijun Jie was so overcome with guilt toward the newborn granddaughter she had yet to hold that she began to weep softly. It felt as though her chest were being consumed by fire.
She hastily wiped her tears, bowed her head to Lady Dong, and thanked her through her sobs.
"Your Fifth sister-in-law and I are mother and daughter, yes — but more than that, we are both wives of the Bai family. She is a woman who bowed to heaven and earth beside her husband and swore her vows. In life and in death, they promised to remain together. And she has only just given birth! What manner of person would tear a mother from her newborn daughter?"
"I will never leave the Bai family!"
Madame Jie's voice rang out suddenly from behind the folding screen, and both Old Taijun Jie and Lady Dong jumped in alarm.
"You...!"
Old Taijun Jie pushed herself up from the table.
"Have you lost your mind! You are still in your confinement — why have you left your chamber?"
Lady Dong hurried around the screen at a brisk pace. Madame Jie, dressed in thin garments, her face drained of all color, had thrown only a single cloak over her shoulders. She stood with her fists clenched tight, and behind her, her maids stood with their heads bowed low, their faces frozen in fright.
Lady Dong steadied Madame Jie by the arm, then turned her head and called out sharply.
"Where is Nanny Di? How can you leave the Fifth Madame out in the cold like this! Nanny Jin, bring my cloak at once! And light a brazier in this room!"
Madame Jie did not stir from her place; she gripped Lady Dong's hand tight.
"Elder sister, for me to have come to your courtyard even in the midst of my confinement is already rudeness enough. I won't go inside."
"What nonsense are you speaking! We are family — where is there room for such things!"
Grieved to see her so careless of her own body, Lady Dong scolded her with a stern face.
She drew Madame Jie inside, seated her on her own bed, and wrapped her in a padded quilt. Then she rounded on Madame Jie's maids once more.
"How do you people serve your mistress? Is there a single one of you who doesn't know the Fifth Madame is in her confinement?"
"Elder sister."
Madame Jie tugged at Lady Dong's sleeve, the rims of her eyes red.
"It isn't their fault. When they told me Mother had gone to see you, I couldn't rest — I was afraid she would secretly beg you for the letter of repudiation, so I followed her here."
As she spoke, Madame Jie looked toward the Taijun.
Tears streamed unending from Old Taijun Jie's eyes. She pressed her handkerchief hard against her chest, then collapsed onto the cushioned seat by the wall.
"And whose doing is all of this, that you say such things!"
"Mother! I have told you plainly enough. I will never leave the Bai family, not for as long as I live — setting aside even my feelings for my husband, and my daughter who has only just come into this world. The loyal souls of the Bai family gave their lives for the people of Jin. How could I ever let the world watch a family like ours be torn to pieces before their eyes!"
Madame Jie's eyes burned dry and hot. Her voice was resolute.
Long ago, she had chanced to overhear a conversation between her elder sister and the Taijun — the mother of the elder sister — and in that moment, she had been moved to the depths of her heart.
Hearing her daughter's words, Old Taijun Jie's mouth fell open, and in the end no sound came out. She pressed her fingers against the lacquered black table and held her silence for a long while, until at last she could bear it no longer. Covering her nose and mouth with her handkerchief, she began to weep.
For she knew now, in her bones, that she would never take her daughter home.
Even if she begged the Empress, even if she pleaded with the Empress to loosen her grip, her daughter would never return. This girl of hers had firmly resolved to put down her roots in the Bai family.
But the Taijun had only one daughter in all the world.